Sigh…i Came All The Way To Sephora But I Don’t Know Which Brands Are Asexual Friendly….i Have To

Problematic Author: Thomas Jefferson

Work: The Declaration of Independence

Reason: “Met God She’s Black” t-shirt is fast fashion 

[two tumblr soldiers bleeding out on the internet frontlines]

“heh… remember strawbebby…. And ranibow spramkle… always made me laugh”

“Don’t talk like that man. We’re gonna get out of here i prommy.” [mortar fire sails overhead and land nearby] “christ its like a childrens hospital out there”

[through shallow breaths] “I always loved…… the color of the sky…………”

End scene

he's the funniest person i know

I don't give a shit as long as those in need benefit

hello skinny internet user. there is a bomb strapped to your chest. in front of you is fanart of a fat character. compliment them without using the words "soft", "huggable", or "cuddly". you have 30 minutes. if you fail to acknowledge fat people as actual human beings and not living teddy bears you will be blown up. the clock is ticking.

blood and boobs are words that scratch the same part of my brain

SCARY INMATE: welcome to the warriors prison what are you in for?

ME: flowing water, still rock. a sunlit meadow and a gentle breeze

GRUFF INMATE: she's one o' them poets! get 'er, lads!

[I swiftly dispatch them with a flurry of blows]

ME: even a delicate rose has thorns..

That post abt how tumblr wouldve gone nuts for morbius 10 years ago is sooo true like not only do they have the “””””sexy”””” matt smith shirtless dance for no reason but his character grows up with morbius as little sickly british waifs and theyre bestest friends forever but then morbius kills him because he also turns into an evil vampire and its sad because they were best friends :( (sorry for spoiling morbius) . Like do you realize how that wouldve DEVESTATED tumblr in 2012. We’re in a better timeline if only slightly