Ughhh Fine *experiences Emotional Growth*

1202

i want to grow out my eyebrows and become the jellyfish woman with a blowfish tongue. i want to be the yellow teethed sun, smiling back at my own anger. i want to use my tears as a blanket and drape them over every heartache i have ever felt until the colors of my pain dilute into a disgusting brown puddle. then i will bathe in it. when i was sad about how slow i was moving through life i found comfort in the late-blooming trees, until i read that they are not really at a disadvantage compared to early-blooming trees. then i got mad. i had a dream of chopping off all my hair and leaving it on your doorstep. i want final proof that loving me never even crossed your mind. i want final proof that i will drive away the wrong people by being as ugly and loud as possible. i want to protect myself from becoming someone's saint.

I love it when an artist puts out a concept album and the concept is that they had a mental breakdown

₊°｡❆ Winter digicam nostalgia ₊°｡❆

My apathy is bc it costs 1 billion dollars for everything but its all simulacra of real things clothes haven’t been clothes since 2009 food is fake weird protein surrogate for real icecream everything is hollow and ugly and spiritually bankrupt but more expensive than ever and you have some clown on the internet talking about how i should go into debt for hailey bieber x dunkin donuts bukkake babe lipliner collab

Benno Kögl

it’s nothing a fundamentally different life couldn’t fix

you might not ever forget, but you will become okay with remembering.

some things that i like in no order:

-milk tea and taro milk boba

-pixel art, the smaller the better

-collages

-those transparent pngs of random trinkets and stuff

-cute press on nails

-looking at all the different trees and bushes and the little berries on the bushes when i'm taking a walk in nature

-dreaming of being a fairy

-sky sky sky sky sky

-fall and spring weather

-laughing with friends

i'm miserable because i keep pulling in people who take risks and live in uncertainty to achieve their goals. well i'm not like that and i never was. i like safety. i like stability. i'm not obsessed with reaching some big goal in life. i just want to live in peace. and i'm tired of constantly being made to feel like that is somehow not the right way to live. that i should be wanting more. i come from generations of women who had to live in uncertainty. who had to run away, who had to stretch the horizons of their lives not because they wanted to, but in order to survive. silence and peace. i want nothing more. and if i never find someone who shares this wish with me, then i'd rather just be alone for the rest of my life.

‘this made me smile’ ☆ taken on june 4, 2011

by sarahxcaulfield on flickr