I Feel Confident Enough To Post These Now. A Collection Of All The Existing Posters After Some Edits

Gem Cities by Neave Bozorgi

ice skating

"flying a b-17 is a lot like playing jazz" —rosie rosenthal, probably

High quality fatherly advice.

DROP HIM, DOOKU, DROP HIM AND RUN

my partner is only 40 but nestled within him is the soul of an elderly man

Tolkien: “Sauron was a victim of Morgoth’s corruption who, then, got high on power trips. When his master was defeated, he truly regretted everything that he has done, but was too proudful to return to Aman in humiliation and face the judgement of the Valar. He wanted to heal Middle-earth and create perfect order and harmony between its people but his bounds to Morgoth were too strong, and he fall back into evil (= became a tyrannical dictator). BTW, Gandalf with the One ring would have been far worse than Sauron himself.” 

Dudebros: “Sauron is the Satan of Tolkien lore!” 

Tolkien: “Galadriel is a proudful and power-hungry elf princess with a “Amazonian disposition” who wanted her own kingdom on Middle-earth. She rebelled against the Valar, and got banished from Valinor for it. Her character arc in “Lord of the Rings” is that of a “repentant sinner”. She’s only pardoned and allowed to return to Valinor after she resists Frodo’s offering her the One ring on the Third Age.” 

Dudebros: “Galadriel is the Virgin Mary of Tolkien lore!” 

“You are shipping Satan with the Virgin Mary, you blasphemous heretics!”  No, we are not.

You really should stop calling these idiots “lorebros” because the “lore” isn’t in the room with us.  

Mar's BBC vs Book Canon Musketeers Assession: a Short Yet Comprehensive Guide

(read under the cut!)

bbc d'Artagnan: baby. has not done anything wrong in his life ever, actual angel, just very stupid.

vs

book d'Artagnan: has the power of god and anime on his side, most annoying little bitch you'll ever meet, broke, has a stupid horse, perpetually single.

*

bbc Athos: depressed older brother figure that's not-so-secretly very soft and loving of his found family and would die to protect them, also still horny for one Milady de Winter. Carries the communal garrison braincell.

vs

book Athos: drunk misogynist who yearns for death and whose only reason to live is his son Raoul. All his braincells have committed self-murder.

*

bbc Porthos: feisty ray of sunshine who has never had a single evil thought in that silly head of his, actually quite clever, complicated and emotional, deserves the world.

vs

book Porthos: vainest person you'll ever meet, doesn't know when to shut up, sugar baby who cares only about himself (and maybe Aramis), has not had a single intelligent thought in his entire existence.

*

bbc Aramis: cinnamon roll, golden retriever, actually quite clever, troublemaker who can't keep it in his pants, lovable self-sacrificial idiot who would get himself killed in a heartbeat to save his loved ones, brightest smile in all of Paris. Invented bisexuality.

vs

book Aramis: mean, edgy, probably secretly a vampire, would sell you to satan for one (1) corn chip, one bad day away from going on a murder spree. Also invented bisexuality.

*

bbc Treville: exasperated dad.

vs

book Treville: extremely exasperated dad.

*

bbc Cardinal: genius evil mastermind played by Peter Capaldi.

vs

book Cardinal: genius evil mastermind sadly not played by Peter Capaldi.

*

bbc Rochefort: worst person you'll ever fucking meet, arguably the only downgrade in the show.

vs

book Rochefort: sneaky lil bastard that's also the bestieTM, we stan.

*

bbc Constance: feminist icon, beautiful queen I'd kill and die for, gaslight gatekeep girlboss.

vs

book Constance: she's just there and then she dies ig.

*

bbc Milady: my cunning evil murderwife, would die for her, deserves the world.

vs

book Milady: actually I believe Athos should have strangled her with his own hands, fuck her.

*

bbc Bonacieux: evil greasy little man, fuck him.

vs

book Bonacieux: he's just... kinda... there I guess? Idk man Dumas looked at the Bonacieuxs and went "nah".

*

bbc Louis: annoying little shit but he's kinda cute and nice sometimes

vs

book Louis: manchild, just There ig.

*

bbc Anne: radiant angel who has done nothing wrong in her life ever and she's also perfection itself.

vs

book Anne: literal drama queen.

*

BONUS ROUND- GRIMAUD

bbc Grimaud: hot evil emo dude, idk what his problem was tho

vs

book Grimaud: actually he just doesn't get paid enough for this shit so if he wanted to murder Athos like in the show I'd understand that lmao

Du Lac de Lioncourt fam I miss you

(Prints available check desc.)

the fall guy + letterboxd reviews