and very, very often, self care is not plants and ice rollers and fluffy blankets of peace.
it’s standing over your kitchen sink and crying while doing the dishes because you just want to go back to bed but the dishes need done. and you don’t know why you’re crying but you're trusting you need it. and you aren’t listening to the music that pulls you into a spiral; you’re listening to some cheerful shit your friend sent you. it’s getting up and staring at your fridge and closing your eyes and then cooking yourself food even though you hate it and it’s miserable. because you know that you’d cook for your friend, and you are trying to befriend yourself. it’s dragging yourself into the shower because you know you’ll feel better afterwards. it’s doing mundane tasks with patience, cursing under your breath, trying desperately to give yourself grace. grace is the beginning of care. care is the beginning of love.
we think it’s supposed to be peace and yet the most powerful self care moments are when we hate everything but especially ourselves. and life does not feel worth the loving. to look into that pain and yet choose to care for yourself in however many pieces you are — that is care. love. grace. trust. belief. it hurts because it’s love where there was no love before. it heals because it believes there will be love, one day, soon.
what is HAPPENING
She actually says this out loud. I'm not joking.
Post rage regret. 🥺
SITH! AHSOKA & ANAKIN SKYWALKER | WHAT IF? STAR WARS BY ME. "YOU FAILED ME! DO YOU KNOW...WHAT I'VE BECOME?" "I GAVE YOU A CHOICE". This is not dark against light. This is more personal. It's not even master against apprentice. It's more than that. It's brother against sister. It's Anakin against Ahsoka. Face to face.
let's face it, Obi-Wan is only a stickler for the rules in comparison to Anakin. this guy thought lightsaber nunchucks were cool as a teenager and jumping out of politicians windows was cool as an adult. he regularly sasses the chancellor of the republic. he saw Anakin and Padmé being super obvious and decided it was none of his business. he sits pussy facing the world in important meetings. hes's a lonely single in your area. he won one (1) fight against a sith lord and decided they were his speciality despite getting his ass handed to him by Dooku multiple times. he's annoying on purpose as a battle strategy. every man he meets desires him carnally and he doesn't notice. he puts one foot on Han Solos ship and is like "damn bitch you live like this" despite having spent 20 years in a desert hole. he gets himself killed to one-up Vader one last time. he's winning the idgaf war
NEED!
Twitter OP is the one making them, by the way.
Within the first hour or two of playing:
Micah broke his stereo
Cain ran away and made everyone continuously sad for three days
Arthur was the only one who could hold down a job
Micah walked around naked. Constantly.
Dutch discovered a passion for cooking
Micah discovered a passion for mixology
Kieran was cooking on the BBQ and got so flustered when Arthur flirted with him that he set himself on fire. Twice.
Micah got pregnant with Dutch's baby after woohooing in a bush
Kieran became self aware and just stood staring at me like this
@sporadicboinglerstealer2000 and I both need eyebleach.
“You were sloppy as Jim Milton. Now look where it got you. You led Ross to you after you killed Micah.” “You would of done the same damn thing, Arthur.” … “You know you ain’t making it outta this, John?” “I know. I guess I was a fool for trusting them to hold their end of the bargain… I failed in the end.” “You still made it out, John. Dutch. Bill. Javier. None of them can hurt anyone no more. And Jack has a real shot at a future, now.” … “Arthur… do you think I did good?” “Of course, John. All we can do now is hope Abigail keeps Jack from going down the same path, now.” “You’re right…” “It’s time, John. They’ve gotten far enough.” John takes a deep breath, and blinks. With that, Arthur is gone. He takes one last peek between the barn door, seeing the dozen+ armed soldiers, rifles pointed at the door. He steadies himself, at peace in a way. Thinking to himself all the things he hopes Jack will accomplish in life. How he never truly made it up to them. How uncle died for this. How if he really redeemed himself. And with that, he opens the doors, ready to face the music.
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, to listen to doctors and get my flu vaccine and any shots i could because they remembered Before.
then they started fighting Covid precautions.
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, that the ozone was disappearing and the earth was dying and we needed to recycle and save the planet.
now my parents think climate change is a myth.
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, that racism was a plague, that we had to love and accept everyone, that we should never judge before walking a mile in their shoes.
then they told me that protesting for my Black siblings was wrong.
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, that we needed to give to the poor. working at soup kitchens. making quilts. collecting food and money and supplies. building houses. because it was the christian and just plain right thing to do.
now they look at me, on food stamps with their grandchildren, and lament the "welfare state".
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, that it was easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven and that any rich man, especially an immoral one, should never run our country.
you can guess who they voted for.
i remember adults telling me, as a kid, so very much.
when did they forget?