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Yes

That is the cutest name for orc ever

Another chapter of my "The Waynes on Twitter" work on AO3

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28 - Human Disaster Bruce Wayne

When I tell you I snorted!

It would be hilarious if villains loved Nightwing and were terrified of Officer Dick Grayson.

Dick Grayson- who is used to open spaces and adrenaline- being stuck in a boring bleak office, surviving on shots of coffee and red bull with caffeine that would make Tim concerned.

The thugs soon realised that unlike most of the other cops - Dick was from Gotham.

No one fucks with Gothamites.

Villain *shooting at Dick with machine guns*

Dick *appearing from the shadows behind him*: Boo.

Villain: THIS IS A FIVE STOREY BUILDING HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET HERE

Or

Thief *throwing a counting down bomb at Dick*

Dick: *catching and tossing the bomb at a safe distance before turning round and shooting it so it explodes mid air while running after thief*

Thief: .. what the actual fuck

Dick: Gee look at all that time you had! Shame you threw it away :D

Thief:

Dick: I’m from Gotham

Thief *realising they fucked up* : Please don’t steal my bones

OR

Shooter: *sets elaborate booby traps throughout the houses in an active hostage situation*

Dick *using his training as robin and inhuman flexibility to surpass them with ease*: Ah been a while since I got to have a nice stretch thank you.

Shooter:

Dick:

Shooter:

Dick: .. Hi :)

Shooter: Are you Satan?

AND

In interrogation room

Murderer: I think I’ll take your eyes and add them to my collection

Dick *running on spite and caffeine that could give Superman a sugar rush* : Funny.. I was going to say the same thing to you

Murderer: .. what

Dick: I wouldn’t take your eyes though.. they look like the inspiration behind the whole Medusa’s “look at it and you turn to stone” thing-

Murderer: Hey! Take that back before I gut you

Dick *smile stretching wider without blinking* : oh? Or what? I know everything about you. Who says I can’t kill you and walk out with everyone being none the wiser? I know how to kill someone too..you aren’t special.

Murderer:

Murderer: I’m scared for my safety.

Because the thing is, Nightwing is who Dick really is. It’s who he can be free as, be himself as without red tapes and regulations. Where he can give as good as he gets, and he’s kind and empathetic. He gets to help the downtrodden and goes easy on most of them if they give up right away, not to mention the fact that he never causes permanent damage.

But officer Dick Grayson is a different story. He runs on sleepless nights and no self preservation. Seeing an officer with an uncanny skill set they’re scarily good at, not to mention the cheery attitude he always has scares the shit out of criminals. Cuz no way in hell is a smiling Gothamite not a deranged one. He chases crimes like a bloodhound, and isn’t afraid to make good on threats he makes to ensure they never hurt anyone again.

Bonus if the batfam doesn’t know about this.

Red hood: Shit I can’t believe we ended up in Bludhaven

Red Robin *tying up the corrupt politican* : Since this is a sensitive case, we need someone we can trust to make sure it is seen through.

Red hood: .. So we paying a visit to Officer Grayson?

Politician *screeching* : NO NO NO NO! PLEASE NOT HIM!! JUST KILL ME INSTEAD AND TAKE ALL MY MONEY I CANT DEAL WITH HIM!

Red hood: .. is he fucking serious?

Henchmen: Sir he is. And we agree. Please take our bones and kill us but don’t take us to Officer Grayson.

Red Robin: Wait what did he do?

Henchman 1: He asked boss if the hat was sentient.. and said that if it was would it make that hat the top and boss the bottom.

Henchman 2: Last time we met I tried to shoot him but suddenly my gun was blank and he raised his hand and let the ammo drop

Red Hood: Well even I could do that-

Henchman 2: They were my bullets. I had selected the colour personally.

Red robin *growing concerned*

Henchman 3: He sang a lullaby to a child when we were holding the station hostage, and replaced the people with my family members. He even sang their social security numbers!

Henchman 4: He’s the most dangerous of them all. I ain’t shitting ya when I say he’s as scary as the bat from Gotham.

*all nodding in agreement*

Red hood:

Red Robin:

Red hood: Nah that doesn’t sound like Dick

Red Robin: Agreed. Let’s go there Hood.

*villains’ sobbing intensifies*

Aaron Horkey

🗡𝐹𝑜𝓁𝓁𝑜𝓌 𝔇𝔲𝔫𝔤𝔢𝔬𝔫𝔩𝔲𝔰𝔱 𝑜𝓃 𝒯𝓌𝒾𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓇 & 𝐼𝓃𝓈𝓉𝒶𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓂

Star Wars is making me delusional for happy endings more than ever and unfortunately I still don't have regrets. The absolute ache my heart goes through every time I stop and think about it in its entirety is phenomenal because how dare these characters from a galaxy far, far away give me pain

Sure we've got the Force and lightsabers and shiny armor and beautiful planets and I'm tickled pink by it all but no one warned me about the tragedy that threw me off the fucking rails with the speed of light

Because can you imagine cutting off the limbs of someone closer to you than a brother and a lover, the other half of your soul, and turning your back as he burns because you can't bring your lightsaber down and end his misery, you can't kill him, you spent years protecting him, fighting for him, keeping him close and not-close so he can find his happiness that the Code you are both bound to cannot give him as you willingly turn a blind eye, only to turn around and find that he has drifted too far and already completely out of your reach, and all you want to do is go back to the time when it's just the two of you, growing and learning together, watching each other's backs against blaster fire, when it was you and him against the world, not you and him against each other. You spend the next 19 years watching over the two stars that are the only parts left of the man you loved from different ends of the galaxy and learning to love them as themselves even as you see him and her in them and it makes you ache, makes you wish for simpler times as you stare down the red blade into red lenses hiding yellow eyes and you are tired, so tired with longing and pain and guilt for the monster you unknowingly helped create

And on the other hand can you imagine finding the child you thought you had lost along with the love of your life, the very people you burned the world for and you thought burned with it? The decades of anguish and anger all culminating to this moment, and instead of the joyous reunion you have always imagined in your weakest moments, it’s her familiar, beloved eyes doused in the color of the desert skies glaring at you with hate and fear as he hides his arm you ruined with your own Force-damned hands. You have loved this child from when he was just a dream whispered underneath the stars, feeling the warmth of twin suns burning in you as you imagine the weight of him (them, you are a father of two) in your arms, incandescent with the promise that you will protect the family you made, all the while forgetting the family you already had. Then you are on your back, electricity still crackling underneath your skin and robbing you of strength as you look at him with your own eyes for the first and last time, and there is forgiveness you didn't know you were looking for, and when you wake up again on the other side of the veil you hope you can find forgiveness there too

I watched return of the jedi for the first time in 4 years and here are my thoughts:

I know the line between sci-fi and fantasy is already super blurry but Star Wars truly feels like a fantasy movie. It’s in the costumes, the worldbuilding, the vibe, the odd encounters, palpatine’s entire character. And while there is futuristic tech the world of Star Wars doesn’t feel particularly Futuristic™️, if that makes sense.

There’s this one imperial officer Bacar interacts with at the start of the movie who acts his ASS off. Seriously give this man an Oscar. The fear!! The subtly!! The little gulp he does before facing Vadar!!! The palpable terror at the idea of the emperor coming there!!! This dude single handedly sets up palpatine as a threat

PRACTICAL SETS!!! All the practical sets!!! There’s so many sequences, especially in jabba’s palace but they’re throughout, where the characters casually interact with the world around them, and it’s such a small detail but it means so much to me. They really feel like they’re part of the world. My favorites were the Hall of Horrors C-3PO walks through in Jabba’s palace and Luke interacting with his x-wing on dagoba

It’s not all this great though, the green screen to the sarlack pit was awful. I found it endearing.

Also I love how there’s so much this movie doesn’t explain to you. There’s this weird robot spider thing in Jabba’s palace that we see when R2 and C-3PO walk in!!! What does it do!!! There’s a guy who’s super upset when Luke kills that monster!!! Who is he!!! And a bunch of other weird little things that just aren’t elaborated on. On top of that there’s just all these strange aliens just chilling, living their lives, some of which I don’t think we see again. It all comes together to make the world feel so much bigger than what we see.

I’d heard the analysis that Luke wears black in return of the Jedi to allude to a possible fall to the dark side, but that analysis hadn’t really clicked for me until this watch through. Like dude’s introduction was him force choking someone

Honestly like has this kind of subdued confidence this whole movie and I love it. He knows he’s good but doesn’t need to flaunt it.

Like his grin when he says “you should have bargained jabba. It’s the last mistake you’ll ever make” I love it

Luke is actually really subdued this entire movie, which tracks with all the internal conflict he’s dealing with. The biggest displays of emotion we see from him are when he’s reuniting with friends or when he goes OFF on Vadar at the end for threatening leia

Chewbacca and Han’s reunion 😭, they care so much about each other, chewy pets his head

In general everyone is so happy to see each other in this movie, every time someone shows up after being separated everyone is so excited to see them. There’s so many hugs. You can really tell they care about each other.

Due to some of the framing, I don’t think leia slaughtering Jabba was part of the plan. I think she just saw an opportunity and took it. Girlboss.

I noticed Luke’s fighting style with his lightsaber is much tougher around the edges, it’s less elegant, which tracks with him having much less official training with it. I like it

Yoda trying to use dying as a way to avoid Luke’s questions. Iconic.

Yoda’s choked out dying words of “there is another skywalker” become so much funnier when you remember he becomes a force ghost. The man could just peacefully pass then come back 10 minutes later and continue the conversation, he doesn’t need to try this hard to get the words out. Then again that would take some of the drama out of it.

Han is just so great in this movie, he’s got a reputation for being this suave sarcastic outlaw, which to be fair he kind of was in new hope, but here he’s just so sweet. He’s the one telling Luke to be more optimistic! When lando gets his promotion to general he doesn’t tell him about his own, and looks genuinely bashful when it’s brought up in front of the group! He goes to check on leia after she talks with Luke! He gives lando the falcon because he knows it’ll help him even though the ship means so much to him and is scared of it getting destroyed! When he thinks leia has feelings for Luke he offers to step aside and not get in the way! This man cares about his friends!

Speaking of that moment with leia after Luke leaves, that’s the one moment we see him being a dick, he lashes out with “but you could tell Luke? Is that who you could tell?!” But then immediately apologizes and comforts her when she asks for it. He loves leia so much and it’s so obvious the entire time

My man thought he was in this love triangle and was doing his best, and was fully prepared to step aside and let leia be happy with Luke. And the face journey he goes on when leia tells him luke is her brother. It’s gold. It’s that math meme but even better.

For the mission to endor, Luke and leia are both in these camo space ponchos and helmets but apparently Han’s outfit was to iconic to change because he just puts on a camo trench coat over his usual outfit

The first speeder chase through the woods of endor struck me as much more low key then it would have been if it was made today. This isn’t a bad thing, but I know if it was made today it would have been much more dramatic, a set piece

When leia goes missing Han, Luke, and chewy immediately peel off from the group to go find her. Good friends but you are LEADING THE MISSION

Leia meeting the ewok is a fun sequence and it’s funny how she just rolls with it. She does not question it, just accepts this little guy is here now and starts following him. It’s funny to contrast this with when Luke, Han, and chewy rescued her in a new hope and she fought every step of the way

In general the Ewoks are such a strange and whimsical inclusion. Like this is part 3 in a space opera and a huge chunk of it has these little furry dudes who live and fight like the lost boys from Peter Pan that we’ve literally never seen before. It’s weird

Luke is so delighted by the Ewoks, from his little smile when the first surround them to trying to hide his laughter at them thinking C-3PO is a god

Also we should not ignore how hilarious his idea to scare the Ewoks into listening was. And the man knew it too, you could tell from his smile. The little shit.

The storytelling sequence!!! I love it!! I love how C-3PO uses the sound effects! I love how everyone is huddled together! I love how we the audience can tell what’s being said from context clues even if we don’t understand all the words!!

Luke peacing out like “it’s time to angst😔”

I do think the bridge scene between luke and leia could have been done a bit better but it wasn’t bad, just a bit flat for the gravity of what was being revealed. Leia and Han are great though

I love luke and vadar’s back and forths even if they can get repetitive

The writers really used “search your feelings” or “your feelings betray you” as shortcuts to avoid hard writing huh

The emperor was such a little gremlin, he did nothing but talk about how luke was going to fall to him, how he knew everything was gonna happen and it’s all according to his plan, he really didn’t do anything but talk shit until the very end with the force lightning

To be fair, Vadar didn’t do anything until the force lightning either

Neither of these points are complaints, palpatine is supposed to be a shadowy scheming villain that others do the dirty work for and the really pull it off. And vadar’s passivity in this movie I think demonstrates the conflict he’s feeling. Despite his words about how he must do his emperor’s will, he’s not really doing that right now, is he? He’s not really defying orders either but something is different

Something I noticed!!! When Han’s team first make it in to the back door, off in the corner as they go inside we see a storm trooper adjusting his armor and taking his position again. One of the rebels stole the storm troopers armor and took their place. This doesn’t lead up to anything but it’s SUCH a cool detail

The true hero’s of this movie are the Ewoks, palpatine had Han’s team captured and the air fleet on the ropes before the Ewoks stepped in and saved Han and co. Palpatine would probably have won if it weren’t for them. It’s great.

I really love luke so much, he’s just so compassionate. For his friends, for his father, for everyone. This is the trait that makes him a hero. It’s literally what palpatine tried to use to turn him, the anger he’d feel at watching his friends die because he loves them so much

“No, you’re wrong. I am a Jedi, like my father before me” not gonna lie, this was kinda hot. It’s that quiet confidence I was talking about earlier. Also the way he nods towards vadar when he mentions his father

“….so be it, Jedi” THIS!!!! THIS!!!! I love this so much!! Because the entire movie palpatine has been talking about how Luke is going to fall to him, how it’s inevitable, how Luke is foolish to think otherwise. But this moment right here, is him acknowledging he’s wrong. He won’t be able to turn Luke, he failed. Luke truly is a Jedi and even palpatine cannot away him. It’s so fucking good

When vadar lifts up palpatine to stop him, we get a reaction shot for Luke who just looks so confused. Appropriate reaction.

As luke is dragging vadar to his ship we see imperial officers and storm troopers running around to try and escape and I just want to know what the fuck was going through their heads when they saw Luke and vadar

I know the falcon surviving doesn’t make sense but it makes me happy

Something important I realized towards the end: AT NO POINT IN THIS MOVIE DID ANYONE TELL HAN VADAR WAS LUKE’S DAD

CHEWY AND LANDO WEREN’T TOLD EITHER FOR THAT MATTER

THEY DON’T KNOW

Presumably they were told later but holy fuck why is no one talking about this.

Again….those reunions, hugs all around, everyone is so happy and relieved and I love it

I know it doesn’t end here, which makes be kinda sad, because this is such a beautiful and hopeful ending

All in all, with all the Star Wars fatigue and what Disney has been doing, this really reminded me what I love about Star Wars. I felt like I could appreciate the movie a lot more on this watch through and had a wonderful time