The Labyrinth Streaches Infront Of You. You Are Lost. Which Way Do You Choose?

I'm already 3 months on hrt but I need more friends to forcefem me in like. Mundane ways.

Learning how to use a round hairbrush to give my hair volume. how to dress cute/flatteringly for my body shape (tho its probably gonna change soon). I've never worn makeup before and that needs to change. Forcefeed me my estradiol/anti-androgen medications (don't forget my vitaminD). Please help me figure out the products I need for a proper skincare routine.

I'm dying out here. Being a first time girl on her own requires so much research. Though it is so rewarding

I’ve been on HRT for over five years now, and while my life may not be perfect, it brings me immense happiness that I’ve been experiencing the joy of being a girl for so long.

So the moral thing to do is find others to grant that joy to, right? They’ll thank me eventually!

Yeah!! Exactly!

I visited a market yesterday and picked a card from the Tarot that a vendor had splayed out at her table. I tried for the card most hidden, and eventually picked the second of two cards that were stuck together.

I flipped it over for the witch manning the table. She read it aloud. "The Candelabra." She thumbed through the pages of a Tarot meanings pamphlet, and continued her reading. "This could mean Crossroads. A Junction. Paths. A Journey. Whatever that may mean to you."

I don't take much creed in the magical, but sometimes it's fun to indulge. And I wanted to indulge. I didn't speak of it, but to me 'Crossroads' meant the choice to come out to my family that night. To do it, or not to do it. 'A Journey' meant that I was ready to take the path. Ready to tell them what and who I am.

I was excited, to say the least. My parents had invited my Husband and I over to watch TV that night. My whole family would be there, it would be perfect.

But it wasn't. My husband and I got home after a big day at a local comic convention and we were exhausted. We fell asleep.

It's now 11 after midnight. The next day technically. I know that the Tarot has no real hold over my life and the path I take, but it feels like I missed the opportunity. I didn't tell my family. I missed my exit off the highway, and I'll need to wait for the next turnoff before I can circle back. I felt so ready but I'm not so sure anymore. I've felt so euphoric lately but now all I feel is dread.

Maybe I should give it some time. That readiness will come back soon.

I have my own Tarot deck at home. It may be time to open it up and do my own readings. Maybe it'll tell me the proper time to do it, or maybe I'll decide against whatever doomsaying it tells me and I'll do it anyway. Whatever. Sounds fun.

Any tips for personal tarot reading?

So satisfying. Can't wait to see more of that guy's work

When I started my transfeminine adventure I was mostly happy with how I dressed, I didn't care. I enjoyed dressing like Adam Sandler every day. Now I stress about outfits for hours before going out, and wearing my old clothes makes me sick to my stomach.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I enjoyed the way my hands looked. I enjoyed that they are scarred and covered in lines like utterly shattered glass. Now I'm exceedingly jealous of online hand models.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I didn't think about my skin, but now I worry about developing a habit of a skincare routine.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I enjoyed going out in public wearing my trans pride pin, but now I'm increasingly aware of the unwelcome stares I get - more than I've ever got in my life.

When I started my transfeminine adventure I wasn't so afraid.

During your exploration you stumble upon a shrine.

The electricity fills the air.

The Deity is present.

Would you like to leave an offering?

A sweet treat from a friend.

A paper star.

A broken pencil.

A piece of lint from your pocket.

Blood.

No.

Lamia 5e Player Race

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I have this arbitrary line I need to cross before I can congratulate myself and come out as trans to my friends and family. I just need to think im pretty for longer than a fleeting second. I need to live a day feeling pretty and go to sleep feeling pretty and wake up again to feel pretty again. And then maybe I'll be able to say "I'm ready".

But what if that agency is taken from me? What if I am pushed before I'm comfortable. What if my breasts grow too large to keep hidden. Or my parents ask me about my girlish tendencies before I even begin to think about how to discuss it with them?

I dont know what to do then. I'll bumble through it and need to live uncomfortably until I hit that arbitrary milestone that dictates when I can be myself, unapologetically, anywhere and everywhere.

It hurts being called a son. A boyfriend. A nephew. A grandson. Referred to as a "Lord" at a renfaire instead of a Lady. It makes my heart sink and my gut wretch. Whatever positive energy I have flushes away.

But I can't bear the discomfort of living my truth in a way that makes myself cringe, because if I cringe others will too. It's silly. So many braver souls do it, and with such confidence that I am jealous and dream fantasies where I live their lives.

It's fine. I'll manage. Someday I'll meet my arbitrary milestone. One day my mother will have a daughter.

Rant about feeling guilty about ranting.

Do you ever start to type a rant or a vent post and just... delete it all? "It's not worth making a fuss," or "you don't need to air your dirty laundry." Fuck. I want to just talk about my worries and frustrations without feeling upset with myself. I promise I'll actually post this one. I deserve to speak about my feelings, but sometimes it's hard to prioritize my own feelings over someone else's comfort. Stupid.

Love realizing things like this, I’m not far ahead enough in the books to know abt this but hell, can’t wait to see it in the future.

Random Horus Heresy thought: The HH book series imo is a terrible quagmire of mystery destroying over explanation. However… it gave us two amazing things. 1. The death of the ‘Dark Angels are traitors” meme, via the canon that The Lion is loyal to the point of being clinically insane about it and gives anyone not as loyal the side eye of suspicion.  2. That Perturabo is not some jealous do nothing, but is in fact a PTSD riddled super genius who embodies the line “YOU HAD ONE FUCKING JOB!” after watching the other 17 dickheads fall over themselves for daddy and gods. 

Adventurous Locale - The City of Sunsets

Adventurous Locale - The City of Sunsets I came up with a sort of trade hub for the Upper Planes and wanted to get my thoughts written down somewhere - why not here? #ttrpg #dnd #planescape

I’m trying to get a few new ideas written out and somewhere visible for people to give me feedback. This is the first one. Somewhere close to one of the Upper Planes of existence sits a strange and unnamed demiplane – a world sandwiched between two impenetrable stone disks. Around its edges slowly pass falling reddish stars, giving the world a sunset glow at all times; once one star dips below…

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