Mildly Stubbing My Toe:

.♨️♨️♨️

Just a quick note that neurotypicals base most of their lives around lying in various ways to various people but if you try to replicate the way they do that and fail they'll punish you and if you don't try to replicate it they'll also punish you. So if you're autistic and are wondering why life seems like a bit of a living hell that might be why

Since Jazz can do the whole Massive Monstrous Wolf thing, do wolfback rides ever happen?

Self-explanatory

reblog to fucking bite the person you reblog from

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

:3

do wish there was more trans media acknowledging that like.... when you probably didn't even grow up as a feminine boy (although in my case compared to a lot of guys I was cus i like....cook and clean and tidy up and stuff) and so the trans feelings kinda just come out of nowhere and overwhelm you and all the realising stuff is in hindsight. like in hindsight i always wanted to dress a certain way or be called a girl but i absolutely didn't know it at the time. like not everyone is that stereotype and a lot of the time you were basically a bit of a lifeless husk before realising you're trans and that makes it so difficult to navigate. like you have no aspirations, maybe 3 friends all of who suck and suddenly you're realising you wish you were a girl. semi related to how vitriolic people are about the very concept of trans girls who used 4chan and stuff. it's like... I guess a lot of people's ideas of what trans women are and were like is very different to a lot of our lived experience.

like a lot of the time, pre transition gender and personality looks like a mattress on the floor, instead of cute feminine always wanted to be a girl always played with the girls sorta thing (again, complicated in my circumstances and a lot of it was essentially not being raised as a Patriarchal asshole)

hi this is a comic about me please be nice

hey

hey robotgirls

*pops your casing open and blows you out with an air duster before swabbing you down with isopropyl alcohol*