Latest Posts by rabbit-with-a-grapefruit-spoon - Page 7

how some of the LU boys vent headcanons but in fic form

okay so a while ago i was really angry about something and cracked open botw to fight some guardians with only melee weapons and i kept getting viciously blasted to the ground and set on fire every time i tried to do anything and i was like MOOD but then i realized something. link always gets back up. immediately. you don’t even have to hit a button. he gets knocked down, and then he gets back up again. over and over for the at least a half an hour i was playing. and then that gave me feelings so i started writing.

this goes completely off the rails very quickly and is ridiculously self-indulgent but it was fun to reread so *gestures vaguely* now you get to see it. fair warning that even though it’s presented in a very video-game-mechanics way, wild is talking about serious self-endangerment so be warned if you’re not up for that. anyway, enjoy!

(2.4k words)

“You know what I do?”

“What?”

Hyrule turned around from where he sat keeping watch by the fire, startled by Wild’s sudden question. Or at least he’d been trying to keep watch, stabbing a stray piece of kindling into the sand at his side over and over again and trying not to think too hard about—well, he was trying not to think about it. Wild stared up at the clear desert sky, deep with unfamiliar stars, laying on his back in his bedroll with one hand stretched above his head, fingers splayed. Hyrule hadn’t even realized he was awake.

“When I’m angry. You what what I do when I’m just so frustrated and furious and filled with rage and I’m caught halfway between breaking something’s bones and breaking down and all I want to do is scream but I don’t even think I have the strength to speak?”

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Ghost Wind AU

part 1 || part 2

These heroes can be real idiots sometimes, Wind thinks dully as he watches yet another poorly concocted plan pan out exactly as terribly as he had foretold it would. This one even involves explosives for that added spice of death.

“For Hylia’s sake,” he says out loud as Sky throws his sailcloth over Hyrule’s hair which is literally on fire.

“Well done everyone,” Time praises once all flames are successfully smothered. They look a mess, the lot of them. Hyrule’s hair is missing chunks and still smoking a little bit, Wild is sporting both a wide grin and a broken arm and Legend is noticeably limping as he joins the rest of the group where they’re congregated.

“I would say that was a pretty successful ambush. We managed to take out all the enemies—”

“And half the mountain,” Wind adds.

“—we may have to work on bringing down casualties on our side, but that’s something we can talk about for next time. Right now, I say we take a well-earned rest. Sky, can you distribute potions to those who need them, please?”

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Literally nobody asked, but I really like the idea that Hyrule was the first of the chain to be brought into the whole adventure.

I know a lot of people hc that Wild is the last to join the group, and my brain adores the symmetry of having Hyrule be the first link in the chain. Because his game was the first released and Wilds game is the last.

I can totally imagine that at some point a few of them, prolly Wild, Wind and maybe Warriors out of pettiness, went around whatever Hyrule they were in and ‘tested’ a bunch of doors to try and find a superior door to Legend’s. (spoiler alert they can’t it is after all the Master Door) Legend just sits smugly in the background cause while he may not be happy about the door and resulting teasing he’s sure as hell gonna take pride in having the best door.

(@technicallya1manband @tortilla-of-courage @sky-squido)

in reference to the chain fic

just realized that when Ravio returns home to find the door gone and multiple items missing from Legend’s house, it’s going to look like some one robbed the place

Please, PLEASE expand on the Kafei being Terminan (?) Link idea. I have already drawn fanart of it--

Ravio, Kafei, and Link are all part of a matched set; each of them possesses the spirit of courage that rests within their world, whether or not they realize it.

Ravio, we've already been shown, mirrors Link in his origins.

In A Link Between Worlds, he serves as Lorule's hero, under its princess. He collects items across the world in the hopes of aiding Hyrule's hero (for a price, of course. Loruleans need to secure their own safety before others), and he refuses to betray the trust of innocent people for his own gain.

The main difference between Ravio and Link is the Lolian's personality.

While Link is usually quiet and reserved, Ravio is loud, outgoing, and...brutally honest about himself. He admits that he's a coward, that he's not cut out to be a hero like Link is. A stark difference, but one we most often attribute to Lorule's sorry state rather than to a fault of Ravio's. After all, we've seen Thieves' Town; we know how bad the world he lives in can change a person.

But why is this important for dear Kafei?

Because Kafei mirrors the opposite part of Link. He has a different origin, but the same personality and knack for dungeons.

Allow me to explain.

When we first meet Kafei, he's—according to Anju—been missing for a month, Skull Kid having cursed him to revert back to when he was younger (Terminian time exists somewhat outside of Hyrulean; we've got enough headaches with the extended timeline as it is without adding to the mix).

Already, we see an eerie parallel to Ocarina of Time. A force of good sealed Link away for seven years, while a force of evil clocked back Kafei for his own seven.

On top of that, Kafei here wears the Keaton mask, which we later receive from the guy he's been boarding with. The Keaton mask is the very first mask you get in Ocarina of Time, from the Happy Mask Salesman’s doppelganger.

Our next hint at their connection comes from their faces. Kafei's face, when revealed, looks strikingly like Link's adult face.

The biggest differences, apart from color palette, are that Kafei's hair is wilder and his eyebrow shape is inverted from Link's. But even if we consider the colors...we get some interesting results.

It's impossible to get real gold with the weird highlights Kafei's hair has, but if we focus on the darker parts, changing them to gold turns Link's hair bluish purple, while nearly perfectly inverting the two's eye colors and tunics. They have a tweaked palette inversion, with the exception of their skin tone.

And then we have the true show of Kafei's claim to heroism in his quest.

We chase Kafei into Satou's hideout, where the Sun Mask he wants to exchange with Anju lies.

He steps on a pressure plate as he tries to get it back, and the security measures Satou left behind take effect. But Kafei doesn't panic—he starts ordering Link around.

He knows puzzles. He knows exactly how these work, despite their being a product of Majora's influence.

Not only that, but we get to control him. For a brief moment in the game, he is the hero, with the same movements and techniques that Link has.

He even does the same victory pose when achieving his goal.

But the final thing, the one that sealed his role in for me, was his reaction to the end of the world.

The moon is falling.

Clock Town is crumbling around them.

And yet Kafei runs home to Anju, despite his curse, despite the fear everyone else has.

He says his wedding vows, which, to his knowledge, will be his last act living, wanting to spend his final moments with the woman he loves.

He invites Link, who is surely doomed too, to seek refuge in the comfort of his and Anju’s home. A small thank you for fulfilling his last wishes.

And he faces certain death bravely.

Because the people he cares about

Are worth more to him

Than securing his own safety alone.

Kafei shows courage when it comes to looking after those he loves.

It’s no wonder Majora wanted to get him out of the way quickly.

girl (?) talk

trying to decide if i'd rather be a tortoise or a turtle. on the one hand I prefer dry land, on the other hand turtles can breathe out of their cloacae so. it's tricky

I love that the internet saw people comparing women and other alienated groups of people and went, “they’re dating,” and, “they support each other.” We’re improving as a society.

if a girl tried to sacrifice me to the old gods that would be totally fine and I would submit but if a guy did that I would fight back a little

Does anyone else feel like every possible star wars ship is kinda dumb or boring in some way

I know darth vader telekinetically choking out a subordinate is supposed to emphasize how he is a scary and cruel and powerful Villain but all I can think is. if I had the power to asphyxiate people with my mind I would spend all of my energy CONSTANTLY resisting the temptation to make people around me shut the fcuk up.

I have a hc that mob eventually picks up on some reigen mannerisms... hes not sure how to feel about this development

crazy how the sun rises every morning. every. single. morning. never takes one damn vacation day. Bitch

so athena burst out fully born from zeus's skull, right?

Krrt: Why do you rub your eyes?

Steve: Idk. To refocus them I suppose

Krrt: Re— what now?

- - - - - - - - - - -

Rachel: Howdy me comrades I just want to say daddy moi adore ya fucks

Krrt: -softly- what the fuck

Steve: -whispers back- i dont know about this one either

Irwn: Ignore her please. Apparently she drank concentrated caffeine from the lab

- - - - - - - - - -

Rachel: -dying screech of stress-

Steve: mood

Irwn: You can understand her?

Space Orcs and the Myth of Harmless Prey Animals

Human, talking to Alien about a bully: So, what you're never going to fight back?

Alien: I am of a prey species, we are not capable of fighting back.

Human: So, what? You'd just stand there and let something eat you??

Alien, flapping its flipticles in helpless anxiety: What else can we do? We are not born with the ability to do harm. We are plant-eaters.

Human: What's that got to with it? The most dangerous animal on Earth is a herbivore and it's a bulletproof tank of pure bloodlust.

2nd Human, who was listening in: Also most herbivores can and will eat meat if they get the chance to scavange on smaller corpses.

Alien: how are you doing that task with your eyes closed?

Human, knitting with their eyes closed: muscle memory.

Alien: muscle what now?

Human, opening their eyes: our muscles learn how to perform tasks without us thinking about it. So I can close my eyes while I knit because I know how a stitch should feel, and my muscles can do it with very little visual supervision.

Alien: you can do regular tasks without seeing what you're doing? You just do these tasks automatically? Because your muscles have their own brain?? That's terrifying!

Human: that's not quite...

Alien: fucking terrifying

Human: OK yeah sure that's how it works. Why not.

Had a humans are space orcs thought

So you know how humans almost universally like to pet animals no matter the size. (Yes I might want to pet a lion and I am not going to apologize for that. Well what if that is a trait that is unique to us/our planet?

Bounty hunting alien group with their new human crew mate lands on a planet to secure their target. After a brief search, the group encounters a guard dog... of sorts. A beast taller than a moose and built better than a bear snarls and growls, bearing its fangs. All members of the group back away slowly and ready their weapons. All, except the human who suddenly gets excited.

"Oh you're so vicious aren't you? Who's a vicious beast? Whose a vicious beast? Yes you are." The human says.

The rest of the group stares in disbelief at the human, who must have lost his mind. Wondering if they should intervene, but also kind of terrified of both the beast, and now, the human.

The beast leans in, inches away from the humans face, letting out a deep growl. The Human reaches up to pet the it, who quickly leans away, wondering what the furless bipedal is up to. Determined to pet the new animal, the human continues. His hand catching up to its head, he starts to scratch behind his ear.

The beast relaxes, experiencing a joy it never thought it wanted. A few minutes go by, and the beast lays down, relenting to the humans pets. Before long, it shows its stomach, not knowing why just reacting to a primal instinct it did not know existed.

"You want some belly rubs!" The human exclaims, rubbing the beasts belly.

Leg kicking away, the beast gets lost in the bliss for a few minutes, until the alien captain finally speaks up.

"Human, What are you doing. That beast is dangerous!" The captain barks.

"Are you a dangerous beast? Whose a dangerous beast?" The human exclaims, continuing to pet the beast.

"Human!" The captain shouts.

"It's fine! See he likes it." The human defends.

Not believing what they are seeing, the rest of the party continue on to find the target, leaving the human to bond with his new pet.

deep cove

Sans sweep was so powerful the residual shockwaves accidentally killed the fucking queen

An Update:

Also, happy Antifa mob anniversary

Okay one shot/prompt idea, so you know hanahaki disease and how if affects people who are victims of unrequited love but what if they just couldn’t believe it was requited So a person so hopelessly in love with their partner but they have such low self esteem that they simple can’t believe that this amazing beautiful human loves them back and so they end up developing hanahaki because even though it is requited they just can’t believe that. You’d end up getting this really depressing story of a couple so ridiculously in love with each other but one can’t believe/understand and ends up dying.

OOOO or you could do it of having a widow or something and develops hanahaki because their partner is dead and so their love is now one-sided and they end up suffering alone because nothing can fix it

Sometimes I pause and wonder why I like childhood friends to lovers tropes so much especially when there’s mutual pining involved and both of them kinda just not saying anything but still not dating/sleeping with anybody else either even when they think they have no chance. and that’s when I remember I’m Demi-aro and ace no fucking wonder I like that trope, its almost as if it’s the exact situation in which I would ever be in a relationship but nope I have not a clue why I like it, none at all.

tommorrow? tomororw????? tomrow? hEH?????  its such a stupid word like why are there so many letters and i swear half of them are in the wrong place. we should just spell it tmaro and leave it at that, it too fucking long

starting one some of the ace headcanon art! and @pencil-pilferer​ THANK YOU, you get me, Asterix occupies a very special and specific “indisputably ace no you cannot change my mind” box in my mind

I saw this meme and I just had to jump at the opportunity.

Asterix fans, I had an idea...

discuss.

Presented without comment.

Asterix and Obelix beloved