People Who Only Use Conventional Social Media Are So Funny Bc They’ll Casually Be Like “can I See

"defend your thesis" why are you attacking my thesis

Bitches will be like "prev tags omg" on my post and I check the preg tags and it's like "blorbo from my shows"

- Louise Penny

NO LITTLE GERMAN BOY DON’T GO INTO THE LONELY

oh mein gotten zis beach is full of foggensadden

Why do I love Tumblr? Because if I go on Twitter and say "I hate washing dishes" 12 guys will show up to lecture me about germ theory and 56 will tell me to buy a dishwasher, but if I go on Tumblr and say "I hate washing dishes" the responses will mostly be "I too hate washing dishes" except for that one person who has a Supernatural meme queued up for just this occasion.

ok so I really love conversations on tumblr and wish to god I could tell u but the problem is I cannot ever be arsed to use any sort of measuring device, so my baking has like 50-80% recipe accuracy and a 8/10 success rate which is a risk I am willing to take (but my friends do frown upon I must add).

I think this one turned out dry once and really good once and kind of bleh once but because I had less bananas and used yoghurt instead that time?

so this was under a banana bread recipe I just used

bringing this to the tumblr crowd. please read the whole post before voting

Some additional info from the comments:

- noone's recording. If any of the car salesmen try they're instantly disemboweled

- the billionaire expects six minutes of cuddling (with the bear) after you're done

- if you and the bear both cum at the same time your earnings are doubled

- bear is 24 years old

Dracula: does not eat or drink

Jonathan "it's probably fine" Harker: He must be a very peculiar man!

Dracula: has no reflection

Jonathan "probably nothing" Harker: that was startling

Dracula: literally lunges at his throat

J. "Crucifix Beads" Harker: !?!?!??