▶︎ DANCING WITH THE DEVIL. [Sunghoon.]

Abstract: You've always felt it in your guts that something is off about the campus heartthrob, Park Sunghoon. Being more of a rational person however, you tried to bury such gut instincts, chalking the dislike towards his wealth and pretty privilege instead. Not that your feelings matter though, you two are two world's apart, which means you two are bound to never get any closer. That is, until an ill-timed encounter with him at a party seemingly have led your worlds to collide because since then, he grew into a looming presence in your daily life. He was always around and always watching. The more you tried to avoid him, the closer he got and eventually you were forced to spend more time with him than you ever wished to. The more time you spent with him though the more you discovered that he was far from the arrogant airhead you pictured him to be, he was in fact, smarter and more diligent compared to the average Joe. In other words, your negative impression of him all these while had never been more wrong. Or so you thought. Because of the rare times your gut instincts turn out to be correct, it was actually for this one too -- but by the time you realize it, you already had your guards down.

Genre: vampire!sunghoon | horror | thriller | fantasy |||| wc: ~21.1k

Warnings: blood; slight suggestiveness; mentions of crimes (missing persons, murder, serial killings); manipulation.

Taglist: @axartia

“He’s staring at you again,” Sunoo, your bestfriend, whispered, “Park Sunghoon, I mean.”

You followed Sunoo’s gaze and indeed staring back at you from across the lecture theatre was the campus heartthrob, Park Sunghoon, with gaze unflinching even after you had caught him staring. What a psychopath, you thought to yourself when suddenly, as if reading your thoughts, one corner of his mouth lifted forming a coy smirk, catching you off guard and forcing you to break the eye contact.

This was in fact not the first time that he had seemingly engaged you in some sort of silent unprovoked and unsolicited rounds of staring contest. It was the third time for this week alone. So far however, you hadn’t been winning — not especially when his stare had always have this sort of unexplainable intensity that pierces right into you, in spite of the distance, as if threatening to bore holes into the back of your mind. Perhaps that is what people were talking about when they harp about just how ‘magnetic’ or ‘hypnotising’ his gaze are. Though to you they felt rather unnerving and invasive. Like that of an old painting whose eyes seem to follow you wherever you move in the room.

“it’s all in your head Sunoo,” you replied dismissively, shifting your attention back to the board where the professor had just written down some important takeaways from last week's reading on Hobbes' Leviathan.

“You wish it was. Pretty boy is still staring by the way,” Sunoo clicked his tongue, “at this point, either you had crossed him or he’s got a crush on you.”

“That’s a whole load of rubbish,” you elbowed Sunoo, trying to get him to shut up so you can continue concentrating in class and stop hearing anything about Sunghoon especially when you already get an earful on the daily from his horde of fangirls who are always singing praises about his looks, his stature, his manner and his wealth. Unlike the rest of the campus though, you have never had a good impression of Sunghoon. Born with both good looks and wealth, no example best display wealth and pretty privilege better in campus than him and his pretty friends who struts around in campus clad in all designers with special parking spaces reserved for their Teslas, Benz and Beemers while also having a whole room in campus dedicated for their hangouts like some sort of a secret student society.

Now and then though, in between the blind praises, you can hear wicked rumours spoken in whispers about these boys: their underground and political connections; all the drugs and booze; nepotism; and the list goes on. It’s unsurprising just how rumour-abound these boys are though. Afterall, not much is known about their families except that they are rich and powerful that no one in their right mind would dare to cross them. Legends are abound of what befell those who did cross them or their family, none of which end well: they either fall to the bottom rung of society or disappear off the face of the earth.

“And he is still staring, go figure,” Sunoo scoffed, leaning back on his seat with arms crossed, looking offended as if he had been the one getting the stare down, “You sure you haven’t done anything y/n?”

“Dude, what could I possibly have done when all I do is stay cooped up in the library or at home?” you retorted as a matter-of-factly. That was however a lie — though only partially. Truth to be told, you had a vague assumption as to why Sunghoon has been shooting daggers through his eyes at you. You believed it could be traced back to a party hosted two weeks ago by Jay Park, one of those influential one in Sunghoon’s circle, which Sunoo had dragged you into.

Long story short, in an attempt to escape the rowdy crowd, you wandered around their bachelor pad in search of quieter corners only to stumble upon Sunghoon making out with the Cheer Captain in one of the empty living rooms upstairs. You remember scoffing at the sight, suddenly reminded of all the A’s Sunghoon has gotten for all his Economic modules despite his absences in classes. Well, that’s a no brainer since he’s dating the Faculty Head’s daughter, you thought to yourself, still grimacing at the sight of her straddling his lap with her head thrown back as he feverishly buried his head on the crook of her neck.

Sunoo would have loved a shot of this for his gossip column, you thought to yourself when suddenly you feel something shifting in the atmosphere. The next thing you knew, Sunghoon had lifted his head up, his eyes meeting yours immediately and directly in such a chilling precision as if he knew exactly that you had been standing right there and watching. In that instance, you swore, you felt the temperature in the room drop while the lighting around the hall grew dimmer. You remember swallowing thickly and backing up slowly, feeling small under the weight of his intense gaze and what seemed like an inhuman glint in his eyes which had sent shivers down your spine. You took off not long after, out of the hallway, out of the loft, not even bothering to tell Sunoo that you were leaving early.

That was when it all started, you reckoned. Because since then, you turned from seemingly being invisible to him to being in his radar. Whenever your eyes accidentally landed on him in campus, you’d find that he was already staring but unlike any normal person who would have immediately stared away, he would maintain the eye contact as if wanting you to know that he had been meaning to stare. His lips would then often twist into a wry smile as if taunting you. It was as confusing as it was annoying because with all the stare down, it was almost as if you had witnessed him murdering the girl rather than making out with her.

“I have a really bad feeling about this though,” Sunoo grumbled, interrupting your train of thoughts.

You scoffed, “I’ve told you a million times before that his vibes are always off — not that you’ve ever believed me anyway.”

Whatever, it will pass, you reassure yourself.

Except it didn’t and nothing could have prepared you for just how badly things would unravel with Sunghoon.

“I just saw the announcement on the board earlier,” you said the moment you took a seat next to Sunoo the next day in Macroeconomics class, “the cheer captain got replaced?”

“Whoa whoa whoa, who are you and what have you done with y/n? She would be caught dead reading announcements from that corner of the hallway — if anything she’d be frequenting the notice board next to the City Hall instead — the one with the missing people and whatnot,” Sunoo remarked sarcastically before schooling his expressions after you shot him a glare, “I’m sorry. I repent.”

“Anyways, as I was saying, isn’t the match coming? Why is she suddenly getting replaced?” You repeated, taking your laptop out as more students rushed into the lecture theatre, filling it up with cacophony of noises.

“Well, the official story is that she fell off the pyramid and broke her leg. Since the match is coming, they can’t afford a limping captain can they? So off she went,” Sunoo answered sassily before smirking, “would you like to hear what I heard through the grapevine instead?”

“No-“

“Heard girlie is pregnant,” Sunoo cut you off, flashing a triumphant grin.

“Dude,” you gasped, looking around to make sure no one had heard it, “what did I say about rumors — if you don’t see it with your own eyes or hear it with your own ears, you pipe it not spread it.”

“Uh, if the shoe fits,” Sunoo quipped with a shrug, “Also, come on. I write one of the most highly-demanded columns in our campus newspaper so my sources are reputable.”

“Define reputable,” you answered sarcastically but Sunoo just ignored you as he began again, “As I was saying, she has been acting all sorts of weird lately — lethargic, forgetful, dazed — well you name it. She hardly attended practice and when she did, she could not execute her moves well at all. The next thing you know, she fell off the pyramid and broke her leg. Since the competition is coming up, they can’t be waiting around for her so they decided to swap the cheer captain. Must be devastating for her though — girlie is so ambitious to top everything, the cheer, and social circle and well, it’s all dust now. Doubt Sunghoon would stick around anymore, that boy got the hots only for the IT girls and well, she’s a has been now.”

“Good morning class,” the professor entered the room, silencing everyone almost immediately, including you two. All of sudden, the image of the cheer captain feverishly making out with Sunghoon from the other night popped into your mind. Your eyebrows knit in disgust at the memory.

“Anyways, maybe that’s why Sunghoon has got the hots for you as of late,” Sunoo giggled, jutting his chin out forward, beckoning you to follow his gaze. To your horror, sitting across of you in the front row, at the opposite side of the theatre, was Sunghoon, already staring back at you.

“I just realised that he has been taking front row seats too as of late, just across of us. They have always sat at the back, or just didn’t show up at all. Coincidence? Me think not," Sunoo winked at you, smirking mischievously.

“Can you stop? He is not staring at me," You rolled your eyes with disdain, "and I don't know why they have started to sit at the front. Maybe they've come to their senses and have started to realise that they should work hard in classes like the rest of us instead of bloody buying their way in all-”

“Y/N.”

You jolted slightly in your seat, startled, eyes wide like a deer in headlights. You bit your lower lip anxiously, wondering if the professor had called your name out to reprimand you for talking in class. Fortunately, that was not the case. Instead, you became this week's victim for his usual surprise Q&A, "Last week we spoke about policy dilemmas especially in this era of new normal. Based on the reading I have asked you guys to do, what do you think is the best policy prescription that countries can adopt now considering the persistency of volatilities?”

“You got this girl,” Sunoo quickly whispered while giving your hand a quick squeeze for support. You squeezed it back, before standing up to answer the professor's question, "At this stage, whether we like it or not, fiscal stimulus is highly needed because the inflation represents like a double-whammy to a the battered society. If we don’t help protect people’s rights to an adequate living standard in light of current situation, not only will their welfare be heavily compromised but the economy would slide into a recession due to the stalling demand which would leave the government with more thorny problems to solve.”

The professor nodded in agreement. As he opened his mouth to praise your answer however, another hand rose up from the crowd — it was Park Sunghoon.

“Sorry Professor, I’m sure that that is indeed a true solution for certain times but we are potentially entering a new era in which inflation levels might stay elevated so if we continue to cater for the masses through fiscal stimulus — we’d be chasing pavements especially since the problem are also heavily driven by supply-side constraints. If anything, I believe it is time to pull back on the demand-side to lessen the pressure on prices,” Sunghoon explained, his eyes fixated on you throughout as if it had been a two-person debate with you instead. As soon as he finished, the corners of his lips twisted into a smug grin as if proclaiming victory. Unlike other times when you stared away, this time you held his gaze. Your brows furrowing in vehemence as this had been the umpteenth time that he had raised his hand to counter your points.

Normally, you wouldn’t even bat an eye to it. After all, you love listening and engaging in healthy debates. But with Park Sunghoon, it felt oddly personal, like he was trying to one-up you at everything — as if he had got a personal vendetta against you. Just like his unsolicited staring contests, he had begun countering any points you present forward, turning a simple Q&A from the professor to you, into a debate between you and him — an unsolicited debate, that is. Regardless of the modules, he would always find a contrasting argument to yours — trying to beat you as if someone was keeping score.

Calmly you argued back, “I agree that that is a good argument against the use of fiscal stimulus but we are not facing just another one-off policy problem. We are also in a crisis. If we don’t protect people’s pre-crisis living standards, not only will their welfare be heavily compromised, demand could plunge and pull the economy down the recession rabbit-hole. So until the economy is decisively restarting, we need fiscal stimulus to continue fuelling the gears of the economy. Then we can wean them off it and tap on other policy tools like monetary policies. Not to mention the use of fiscal stimulus can also help address some of the supply-constraint problem that drove up inflation in the first place as it could also be channeled towards re-employment, investment, expansions and so on.”

“Wow,” the professor gave an applause, a proud smile adorning his lips, “You two indeed have showed the crux of the policy dilemma that countries face. While in normal times, both of your policies are perfect solutions — in crises, they can become a double-edged sword. So the answer is often in weighing the risks carefully — to weigh which policies should be leveraged more on further, for how long and how to ease it off in the mid-long term to prevent adverse implications from fossilising. Good job you two. I haven’t seen such contentious debates in a long time — I can die peacefully now.”

The class roared in laughter along with the professor as you two sat back down, eyes still on one another, the smirk never leaving Sunghoon's lips and the scowl never leaving your face. At this rate, it really did seem like he was one-upping you. That he had a bone to pick with you.

As soon as the class ended, best believe Jay was the first to poke fun at Sunghoon’s active participation in the lecture. With a sharp-angled jawline that looked like it could cut glass, and sharp deep-set eyes that are well-framed with strong arched brows — Jay is very masculine-looking and can come across as very intimidating. Despite that however, he is actually the social butterfly and the jokester in Sunghoon’s little clique. In other words, if you get pass his intimidating looks, he is actually the easiest to befriend and get along with.

“Are you trying to switch your reputation from being the campus heartbreaker to the campus nerd?” He raised his eyebrows as he sat on the table, waving at some of guys and girls that passed by who greeted him before they exited the hall, “You have been on a bloody roll in lectures and seminars these days. At this rate, you’ll end up as the teacher’s pet. Unless of course, that’s what you wanted, wait— is there a MILF that you’re trying to impr-“

“I’d wash your mouth with bleach if I could,” Jake smacked Jay by the arm. Jake, the blonde one, with the chiseled face, wide smile and plump lips, on the other hand, looks like the easiest to approach as he gave off Golden Retriever vibes though he is actually one of the most cunning one in the group with a penchant for flirting. “Nothing is hotter than a man with both looks and brains so whatever shit Sunghoon is trying to pull, I’m pretty sure it will bring more girls which translates to, more meals,” he added, snickering.

“Yeah, your mouth will get half of that bleach too Jake,” Heeseung chided, taking a jab at Jake as he joined them, “what did I say about being less explicit and crude when conversing? Do I have to print out a proper glossary for you guys? I have a reputation to uphold as part of the Student Body remember?”

Heeseung is the oldest one in the clique, the one that is pretty much the boy of every parents’ dream: handsome, an honor student, head of the Student Union and pretty much an ace, being able to master almost anything he decides to dabble into. Being the ”oldest“, he takes it upon himself to make sure the boys behave and do not step out of line.

“Pfft, loosen up,” Jay sneered, “most of the suspicious things we say are taken as innuendos anyways so we’re good. Had this been the 17-18th century however, we’d be burnt at stake.”

“That’s because your crowd are mostly those kind of people-“ Heeseung rolled his eyes at Jay before noticing Sunghoon spacing out next to them, “hey pretty boy stop staring at her, you’re burning holes.”

“Right… what is up with you lately,” Jake elbowed Sunghoon, “Found a new potential toy? A meal?”

“Might be a pest but I still can’t decide yet,” Sunghoon answered flatly, arms crossed as he leaned against the table behind him, eyes fixated on you.

“Well for a pest, you sure are taking your sweet time brooding over it,” Jay mocked, “Have the accident with your most recent toy gave you some sort of trauma?”

“I wish I had made it into a real accident myself, then I wouldn’t have to deal with her calls,” Sunghoon scoffed, seeing his phone lit up for the umpteenth time from the same person this week: the Cheer Captain.

“Can’t you pick up her call at least once?” Heeseung sighed, “you owe her that much after ruining her life.”

“Don’t be overdramatic, it’s just a broken leg,” Sunghoon’s lips curled into a wry smile, showing a lack of remorse, “Also, how is that my fault? It occurred like a few days after that night so it’s all on her. She should’ve gotten a transfusion or get an energy drink if she feels lightheaded or weak.”

Heeseung sighed. This is the thing about Sunghoon — he has no tact at all which sometimes meant that Heeseung has the be the one cleaning up some of the little mess he stirs up. But then again, it is still much better compared to the mess that Jay and Jake stirs from being the more flamboyant, reckless and hot-blooded ones in the group.

When Sunghoon looked back up from his phone, you were already done packing your things up, sharing a hearty laugh with the pale guy next to you as you two made your way out of your row. Sunghoon grabbed his backpack, looking like he was about to walk up to you. He was a step too late though as a red-haired guy beat him to it, greeting you loudly with a dimpled smile. He recognized the boy since his face was always plastered over the University’s notice board and paper. He’s the campus Taekwando champion, Yang Jungwon.

“Tonight?” Sunghoon heard him ask you. You nodded, answering, “Yep, same place and time yeah?”

With that you headed out of the room, paying absolutely no attention to Sunghoon, as if he did not exist. Sunghoon scoffed, that was one of the growing list of things that irked him about you. The fact that you never showed him any other expressions than that of disinterest and contempt — the latter of which has to even be purposefully elicited from you such as by publicly countering your points in class and whatnot. He didn’t know why this irked him so much when he is already smothered with so much interest and attention already on a daily basis from half of the uni’s population, and you’re just one person, of no significance to him.

Whatever it was, he did remember when it all started though — it was the night of the party. As if imprinted into his brain, he remembered your expression of disgust during that night. The way you scoffed and rolled your eyes when you saw him with the Cheer Captain. He knew full well that you did not clearly see what he was doing but the expression struck a chord in him.

He was getting sick of the Cheer Captain and her constant need of attention and affection. His mind was also starting to tread dangerous waters, thinking of how unfair the relationship was on him. After all, she got everything and anything a human could possibly want in a relationship by dating him: a hot boyfriend with looks, brains and wealth, which in turn also shores up her reputation as the IT girl in campus. But there was honestly nothing to be gained for him from dating her, except for making him appear more humane, in Heeseung’s words, and perhaps to satisfy his carnal desire, though he hadn’t even have much of that to satisfy in the first place. She would go through lengths though to make sure it is fulfilled but at the end of the day, it still felt lacking for that was not the hunger and desire that he really needed to satiate.

Unbeknownst to him, his head had travelled down her neck, triggering his own hypersensitivity towards the blood that was coursing through her veins. In the dangerous cocktail of thoughts and proximity, his throat dried up and his mind went on free-fall as soon as he sank his teeth onto her neck. He could feel himself losing control but he didn’t care, he was really getting sick of her, of everything — he could take care of another dead body easily so he thought, why not?

So he did. The euphoria, especially after depriving himself of fresh blood for a long time was off the charts. But it did not last long for he felt someone else’s presence nearby. As he lifted his head up directly towards the direction of that presence, he met your gaze, your face already contorted in a grimace at the sight. Being quite a prideful as a person, he did not take the your look of disgust well — not when it came from a mere mortal whom he could have killed in a heartbeat. But of course, that was not the sole reason as to why Sunghoon got so worked up. See, Sunghoon was always praised for his ability to restrain himself from devouring human for their blood. Unlike other vampires, he actually preferred to stick to bagged-blood diet for sustenance instead of hunting or preying on mere mortals. Other vampires might see this as discipline of the greatest form — something exemplary and someone worthy of utmost respect especially since times have changed which forced them to be extra cautious at liberally hunting human just for their blood.

But the real truth is actually not so rose-tinted though it is something that only Sunghoon himself knew. Despite Sunghoon being amongst the elite of the vampire classes — the one with the pure-blood lineage, old money, and diverse and high education background — deep-seated within him was a hatred of his own nature. He loved control and order. With his wealth, intelligence, looks, charisma and magnetism — it was not difficult at all to either maintain or gain such control and order. The only thing that he failed to control was his thirst for blood when it does dawn. For a being that is supposed to be one step higher than mere mortals, the sight and smell of blood can immediately deprive his kind from any sense of rationality and free will — the satiation of which turns even the most noble into a beast, basically no different than an animal. Him notwithstanding. He hated that feeling — of losing control, of letting his hunger overthrow his rationality and consciousness. The disgusting aftermath of which serve as a reminder just how much of an animal their kinds can be. It all just feels like a vulnerability to him. Hence, he begun to depend on bagged-blood instead. Aside from being fuss and mess-free, a plus for a rather fastidious lad like himself, he won’t lose control. The constant uptake of which also help keeping him well-satiated which in turn helps him to withstand any direct exposure to human blood. But then again, he is loaded with lots of connection so it is relatively easy for him to source them. For other lower-class and average vampires however — they have little to no choice. Of course, he has not completely abandon such dietary needs yet. He still prey on people if they are easily accessible to him, which is pretty much all the time, given how people just buckle easily under his charm, wit and personal magnetism without him having to do much. It’s like they just willingly serve themselves on golden platter for him. Still, compared to other vampires, he always displayed more class and restrain when hunting/preying which explains his rather low body count.

This is therefore why your expression of disgust that night, when he had lost control of himself in what he would have described a ‘moment of weakness’, struck a nerve in him. It was as if you were taking a jab at his deep-seated inferiority complex. You, a mere nobody and a mere mortal. Anger thus immediately rose within him at that time, as evidenced by the the drop in temperature and the dimming of lights in the room which reflect the sudden shift in his energy. Long forgotten was the limp body in his embrace for all he saw was you. Vexed, it occurred to him there and then to hunt you down and make you the next cold case in town though Heeseung came in just in time to warn him that he was almost draining his trophy girlfriend bloodless, kicking some sense into himself and stopping him from preying on another poor victim.

Ever since then however, he cannot help but pick you out in the midst of the crowd, only realising that you two shared a few modules together as if you are just destined for him to mess with. He ran with it. Without realising however, in the midst of the constant in his life that was becoming boring, you somehow became a new point of interest in his life with your quirks and habits. Like a scientist fixated on a specimen, that is. Not to mention, he was beginning to enjoy the micro-change in your expressions which he can elicit from you just by staring you down or engaging you in a debate.

“Well, if you need a new toy,” Jay slung an arm over Sunghoon’s shoulders, transporting him back to reality, “I know one that is just as perfect as your previous one. I happen to know that the new Cheer Captain got the hots for you — how does a new trophy girlfriend sounds like? She is also hosting a party tonight so you know…”

“You can take her,” Sunghoon cut him off, shoving Jay’s arms off his shoulders, “I’ve got more interesting thing to do.”

“You’re early.”

You hear soon as the door of the personal study room you were in creaked open behind you.

“You mean, you’re 5 minutes late?” You retorted as you swivelled around, expecting to see Jungwon, your partner for your Macroeconomics project. Instead of the red-haired cat-eye lad however, you were greeted by Park Sunghoon — the last person on earth you would expect to bump into in the library.

“You don’t look very happy to see me,” he said flatly as the door closed behind him, “I’m offended.”

“Uhh, this room is occupied and booked — in case the sign outside isn’t clear enough,” you replied curtly, “I’ve booked this room a week ahead already so you can’t just barge in and take this room okay? Follow procedures for once.”

“Well, someone already has a clouded opinion of me apparently,” he smirked, grabbing the chair that was across of you to your side, “you should consider being nice to me now. I’m your new project partner afterall.”

You stared at him in disbelief as he calmly sat down, “New partner? No, that can’t be right. It’s been 3 weeks, why would the professor suddenly change my partner?”

“Well, it’s not like the assignment of project partners have a statute of limitations,” Sunghoon shrugged before propping up his chin with his elbow on the table, facing you, “Regardless, I’m your new partner so get over it. I’m Sunghoon by the way.”

“Um duh, your notorious reputation precedes you, I know your name,” you replied as a matter-of-factly, flipping the pages of your notebook.

“I’m touched,” he smirked, “I know yours as well, it’s y/n.”

“mmhmm,” you gave him a quick glance, looking uninterested and unimpressed, before your eyes travel from the mind-map in your notebook to the opened email app in your laptop, “Let’s just crack on then. So, Jungwon and I have already discuss the potential structure and have also divided the tasks between ourselves. The parts highlighted in turquoise are his and in yellow, are mine. So far we have been doing the groundwork research for our respective parts. We are meant to meet again next week to piece them all up together and see what kind narrative we can go for in response to the question. But now that you’re here…” you drummed your fingers against the table, assessing the mind-map of work division on your notes, “the most straightforward way to divide the task between you and me would just be for you to take up Jungwon’s share and just continue where he left off. But I can see how that can be unfair since you weren’t the one agreeing to those share of subtopics in the first place so if you find any of the topics that I am currently doing more easy or comfortable to venture into — feel free to take them, I’ll switch them with yours. Don’t worry, I’ll hand over all the research and analysis I have done so far so you can build on it should you wish to pursue them.”

You looked up, slightly startled to see his face so close next to yours as he peered over to see your notes while calmly reassuring you, “don’t worry, I’ll take his share. You can just continue with yours.”

“If you say so,” you nodded in acknowledgement, quickly scribbling some notes on the mindmap, “Moving on. Like I said, we were meant to meet again next week to piece it all together. But, since you’ve just jumped in, I would have no problem postponing that — just let me know whenever you’re ready. Maximum by the end of this month I guess? So that we can have the structure and a definite direction ready at least.”

With a smug grin, he leaned back, “Oh please, no need for that. I’ll get it ready by next week. It would be as if nothing had changed.”

“That’d be perfect then,” you replied before shutting your laptop close, “I’ll email you the materials, template and some references.”

“That’s it?” he raised his eyebrows, watching you pack up.

“Unless you have any questions?”

“Not really,” he shrugged, “just thought we’d be doing it together.”

“We will. But at this stage it would be more efficient to do some of the deep research individually since there are so many grounds to cover,” you explained, “And since it’s individually done at this stage — we don’t have to stay together. I’m pretty sure you’d rather be anywhere but here and be with anyone but me anyway.”

“That’s not true. I could have just sent you a text or an email if I didn’t want to spend time with you don’t you think?”

You scoffed, slinging your backpack over your shoulder as you headed for the door, “See you next week, just email me if you have any questions or anything.”

Without sparing so much of another glance nor a wave, you exited the room.

“How annoying,” he muttered as soon as the doors close. Though seemingly looking calm and unperturbed, his clenched fist and the slight twitch of his eyebrows indicated otherwise. Suddenly, the lights throughout the library flickered, startling everyone including yourself, who had just exited the lift. Only when he unclenched his fist did the lights stop flickering. He does not really like using some of his powers as it drains him easily especially in the absence of fresh blood but as of late — he had found himself uncontrollably tapping onto them.

No cross that, he thought, you made him resort to them.

“Told you we would find our boy in the library,” the blonde boy, with the golden-retriever energy, exclaimed as soon as he reached the top of the mezzanine floor, skipping happily towards the lad who was all hunched up over his desk at the corner. Sunghoon did not even bother looking up, knowing exactly who the owner of the voice was — it was Jake.

“Hi buddy,” Jake grasped him by both shoulders as if trying to scare him, not that Sunghoon budged. The lanky guy, with sharp eagle-like eyes, Jay, joined not long after, scoffing at the sight of all the works messily strewn across Sunghoon’s desk as he picked up one of the books on his table, “Really? You’re putting a massive blow on our image Sunghoon. I mean even the official nerds aren’t in the library at this hour.”

“Can’t you read the sign? This is the quiet zone,” Sunghoon emphasized, snatching the book that Jay was holding up, “Oh wait, I’m talking to the guy who kept on flunking his classes from one century to the next.”

“Hey, I still score higher than you for Politics and History okay,” Jay retorted, “Also, I mean — come on, you’ve excelled in almost every classes in every century — how many more do you want? Are you not bored yet chasing such trivial pursuits like these mere mortals.”

“I don’t think the grades are his endgame,” Heeseung quipped, joining the boys last, jutting his chin towards the side of the ground floor where you were seating at, totally oblivious of the ruckus over the mezzanine floor.

Recognising the girl to be the one always in a heated debate in lectures with Sunghoon, Jay rolled his eyes, “Seriously dude? If you have a bone to pick with her just finish her out quick. You act as if you cannot just easily take her out. Why are you playing some cat and mouse game with her? Are you that bored now that your trophy girlfriend isn’t around?”

“Maybe our little prince here is loving the chase,” Jake touted, grinning mischievously, “We are predators after all — the chasing part of which can get even the sanest of us high. That is, if hunger does not overtake it.”

“Look, I don’t mind your little games,” Heeseung interjected, resting his hand on Sunghoon’s shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze which felt far from comforting but more like a warning, “but you should be careful. You have been unnecessarily reckless as of late. First, the cheer captain then the taekwando champion — two important people in campus, two ended up hospitalised. If people around here were any smarter, they could’ve sniff out some similarities between the two cases which could put us in danger. This is no time to be playing around when beyond campus, missing people cases are already on the rise.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sunghoon shrugged Heeseung’s hand off, looking up at him with an almost taunting stare as he sneered, “Didn’t you hear what they all say? The cheer captain fell off the pyramid whilst Jungwon passed out from severe anaemia.”

The grin on both Jay and Jake’s face immediately dropped with the former almost gasping out loud, “shit that was you? Wait — if you’d been that bold and reckless as of late, you should have no problem preying on her. Instead you’re resorting to some lame cat and mouse game with her.Geez, what is wrong with this lad.”

Indeed, like a true predator, he could just make things easy for himself by preying on you at your most vulnerable, which is pretty much most of the time for you. After all, you frequent quieter hallways, spaces and streets; you stay until graveyard hour at the library; you go home at the dead of the night and you’re pretty much alone half of the time he saw you in campus. Basically he had plenty of opportunities to do so. But he never did. Instead, he just observe you from afar or tail you — as if you’re a specimen, not a meal.

“Did she hit a nerve with you?” Heeseung raised his eyebrows, noticing the slight twitch in Sunghoon’s eyebrows as soon as he said it which confirmed his allegations. You can always leave it up to Heeseung to hit the nail right on the head. Sunghoon suddenly remembered the look of disgust you flashed him the night of the party. The contempt he felt never went away, it builds up the more he sees you. Most of the time, you act like he doesn’t exist — not even paying him the slightest attention unless forcefully elicited through some prolonged eye-contact or public debates. But even during those times, you either immediately stare away as if he was not even worthy to be stared at. Lately, in fact, you even purposefully avoided him. If he was in your lane or in a room you were heading, you just turn around, as if he’s a plague. Without realising, his hand was already curling into a fist, a glint sparking in his eyes as it stayed lock on you over at the ground floor. It was all painfully noticeable to Heeseung who then cautioned him, “You better nip the obsession in the bud Sunghoon. Don’t drag it out or else I’d have to take matters into my own hands.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Sunghoon murmured, the corner of his lips lifted, forming a wry smile, “I’ll let her stay on her high horse for a bit — let it get higher, even. That way, when I push her off it — it would be one. painful. plunge.”

Heeseung sighed, shaking his head dismissively, “You’re calm and disinterested most of the time. But when not, so vengeful and obsessive.”

“Explains why no one dares to cross him,” Jake shrugged, “Anyways, we didn’t go all the way here to study or chit chat. We’re here to drag you to the party Sunghoon. So come on, pack up and-“

“Told you guys I wasn’t joining,” Sunghoon replied nonchalantly, brows furrowing when he spot your friend entering the study hall, skipping happily towards you.

Jay chuckled as he stood next to Sunghoon, as if rejoicing the fact that nothing can be done on Sunghoon’s part anymore, “Well, not much you can do tonight it seems — girl is occupied now. So, what do you say? Shall we head to the party? You’d be obsessing over the missed opportunity all night so better drink it all up tonight, no?”

Sunghoon glared at Jay before exhaling sharply, “Fine.”

Over at the side, by the bannister, Heeseung stayed silent as he watched Sunghoon, his eyes looking stern. Noticing his grave expressions, Jake approached the older guy, trying to lighten up the atmosphere for him, “Sunghoon has been so disinterested with life for quite a while — the change is kind of exciting to see no?”

“I’d rather he turn her into the next cold case in town than let him play mind games with her,” Heeseung mumbled, face impassive, “He can grow too obsessive to the point of irrationality that it can put us all in trouble.”

“Oh lighten up hyung,” Jake nudged him, “He’ll probably get bored of her soon.”

Except, Sunghoon never did for it became a new habit from then on, to stay until the dead of the night at the library just so that he can be around you. He was not really sure why he would do such a thing for there never really had been any plan in mind. He just saw you walking to the library one day, followed you, saw you stayed and decided to stay as well. He kept himself occupied too while at it since you spent ingloriously long hours in the library and he cannot just sit around and watch you all night. Since he had always loved being alone, the dead silence of the library during graveyard hours provided him just the respite he needed from the all the ruckus he had to face from being the campus heartthrob. He is quite intelligent and cerebral too so doing work for real in the library did not felt like a chore — it was rather enjoyable to him. He was able to see how theories and schools of thoughts that rose to prominence during 'his time', now dismantled by another school of thought. So feeble, he thought, the ebb and flow of human life and thoughts.

Now and then however, whenever he glanced up from his work, he would find his eyes landing on you over at the ground floor. Like gravity always pulling things back to earth, his eyes just always find you. Sometimes he would feel compelled to just walk up to you, strike a conversation or just bother you but somehow whenever the desire to do so was the strongest, the pale guy that was always with you would appear. He noticed the guy would often come by around midnight, skipping happily across the carpeted floor, and not long after, you would pack up and leave the library with him. It was as if he came by just to fetch you — like a parent or a guard dog, he thought.

Tonight however, your little guard dog was nowhere in sight. As if the stars were aligned for Sunghoon too, you had somehow dozed off in your study carrel — giving him an easy excuse to come up to you in case he needed to justify himself. He carefully approached you as the clock chimed, noticing the way your shoulder rise and fall with every breathing, the look of ease that spread across your face, the way your hair softly fell over the side of your face and the fact that you were still holding onto your pen, the ink bleeding onto your notes as it stayed on spot for who knows how long.

As if there was a magnetic force in between, his hand had already reached out towards you, gently tucking strands of hair that had covered your face, behind your ear. The warmth of your skin electrifying against his freezing hands, it was almost comforting. Instead of stopping, his hand continued travelling downwards, from your cheeks, to the side of your jaw then to your exposed neck. Suddenly he can feel the shift within himself. With his senses heightening, he was now becoming hyperaware of your beating pulse, which he could feel right under his fingertips, and the blood coursing through your veins. He swallowed thickly, feeling his judgements starting to become clouded when suddenly your eyes fluttered open. Startled, you jerked backwards in your seat in surprise, smacking his hand away in the process, “The fuc—“

He stared at you, deadpanned, as if he had not just done anything remotely suspicious nor invasive, “Are you always this jumpy?"

“I- well what were you doing anyway?” you asked, flabbergasted, your heart still hammering against your chest. You realised that the place was empty save for both of you.

“I wanted to wake you up, it’s midnight,” he answered as a matter-of-factly.

“Oh,” you took a quick glance at your watch, suddenly feeling embarrassed that you were thinking so negatively of him, “yeah, you’re right. I must have dozed off. I should pack up. Sorry about that—”

“No… wait—” he held onto your wrist gently, stopping you, “Stay for a bit. I have something to ask.”

You looked around, wary of the security guard who should be doing his rounds by now. It was already half past two. By then the security guard would have lost his composure if he found out you guys were still in the library when you guys should have long packed up and leave as the library should have been closed 30 minutes ago, “I- uh, I guess we can do a quick one before the guard comes.”

“Oh don’t worry. He won’t,” Sunghoon muttered quietly. You gave him a quick side-eye as you sat back, wondering how can he be so sure but decided not to ask anyway. Truth is, he had made the security guard doze off earlier so that he can spend some time alone with you. But you did not need to know that, he thought, smirking to himself.

“So,” he began, placing his laptop on your desk as he lowered himself down your level, “You said, we could use these sets and these right? Perhaps we can add another? As a dummy variable? I’ve selected some years where like absolutely nothing out of norm happening. And then, I’m also thinking that we can trial 1980s data sets, it has similar noise to your 1950.”

You looked closely at the data sets he highlighted which indeed showed similar contexts, “That’s true. They were indeed times of distress which could serve our narrative well. Wow, I should’ve thought of that. But anyways, yeah sure we can add a dummy variable and trial that one period. They seem to be highly correlated which can help us support either arguments. I actually, saw some similar arguments from these authors —”

But Sunghoon was not listening at all. As you were busy raising some important points, his attention had long darted away from the project, to you. From the way you gesticulated to make your point; the way your eyes sparkled as you explained your points thoroughly; to your plush lips; then down to your exposed neck and collarbone — suddenly reminded of the warmth of your neck and pulse that he could feel right underneath his fingertips just moments ago. Without realizing, he found himself slowly leaning in, getting delirious from the thoughts which were further intoxicated by the captivating and alluring smell of your perfume — a delicate blend of green, citrusy, and woody notes.

“You smell nice,” he murmured, his breath tingling against your skin, sending shivers down your spine.

“Excus-“ you turned to face him, about to shoot him a glare, only to suddenly get caught off guard by the proximity between your faces. His stare was deep, almost sultry, as it bore onto yours, making you gulp nervously as you backed away slightly. The proximity and the uncalled-for comment was really triggering your flight response but as he had placed one hand on the edge of your table and the other on your seat’s headrest, you were effectively caged in.

He, on the other hand, was unflinching as usual and as if he could read your mind, you notice the slight twitch on the corner of his lips and eyebrows — looking as if he was satisfied seeing you flustered. Snapping out of it, you pushed his laptop and papers back towards him, “do you not have any concept of personal space? Move back. You’re hogging my share of oxygen.”

Grinning coyly, he straightened back up. He knows not to push buttons too far. Not this early at least, "Why? Did your heart lurch?”

“No, but my hands were just about to had you gotten any closer,” you deadpanned, rising up from your seat, realizing that he might have had underlying intentions —whatever it was, “Anyway, sure. Trial them. I’ll add on with the justification if the results are favourable…” you continued as you pack up, “We’re done right? I’m heading home.”

“I’ll walk you home.”

“There is absolutely no reason to. Dont you live like at the high street or something — that’s the opposite way,” you countered, throwing your backpack over your shoulders and making your way towards the door.

“Which is why I have a car,” he emphasized, following closely behind you, “I can drive you. The bus doesn’t run anymore at this hour right?”

“Doesn’t really matter, my accommodation is still within walking distance,” you maintained, suddenly wishing that the guard would show up and interrupt you guys. Sunghoon was getting really pushy and considering all the weird moments you two shared, you were starting to get really uncomfortable.

“Haven’t you heard of the rising cases of people going missing? it’s not safe to be out and about alone.”

“I’d rather be caught dead than be caught riding your Benz,” you scoffed as you reached the lobby, “You should go home too. Your pretty face is a better catch than me in its entirety.”

He smirked as he outpaced you, grabbing the door handle before you could, “well, not all predators target the same prey.”

You looked up at him quizzically. Leaning down, he whispered in your ear, “be careful then", before pushing the door open for you, gesticulating that you are free to pass through. You wanted to reply him, to have the last word but decided against it. So far, any small talks with him will just snowball rapidly into something else, just like a trap, so without wasting any more time, you brushed past him, putting your headphones over your ears as you walked down the tarmac path towards the main road. As you walked though, you could not help shake the feeling that there was a slight edge in his voice when he cautioned you earlier.

The end of another week rolled by. End of weeks are kind of special for you and Sunoo because if you guys plan to walk home together, you guys would make sure to take a slight detour to the 24-hour bubble tea shop in the city centre as a little reward to yourselves for working hard in campus all week. That was indeed the plan for tonight too but you have just received a text from Sunoo earlier to not wait up. He was told that his dance club was suddenly invited to perform at a big event next week so he would have to practice until much later from tonight onwards. Thus with no one to remind you of the time, you got so engrossed in your work at the library. Not to mention, the guard, yet again, was nowhere in sight so you overstayed your time.

“Where’s your little guard dog?”

You jumped in your seat, startled, “of course, it’s you,” you huffed, hands flying over to you chest in an effort to calm down your heart that had almost leapt out of your body. It was Park Sunghoon, again.

“For someone who is kind of fearless, you really are jumpy,” he mocked.

“Excuse me, you’re the one who snuck up on me,” you retorted, “Also what guard dog?”

“You know, the pale dude who is always with you,” he replied as he casually pulled one of the empty chairs and dragging it to your side, “the one who looks like a fox."

“His name is Sunoo and no he is not my guard dog,” you corrected.

“I hope not your boyfriend either?” he quipped, eyebrows raised, lips curled into his usual playful smirk.

“What is it to you anyway?” You shot back, eyeing him suspiciously as he took a seat beside you, placing his bag between your seat and his, “Also, what do you want from me this time?”

“Geez, you’re always so friendly,” he remarked sarcastically.

“And you’re always up in my business,” you replied sardonically, plastering a fake smile, “no seriously though. If you need anything from me, just shoot now. Before the guard comes, we are like overstaying our time here again. If he sees us, he’d go ballistic.”

“Don’t worry about that,” he grinned coyly, “I know for sure he won’t.”

Your brows furrow over his overconfidence again but decided not to think much of it, again. It has been 3 weeks since you guys started working together and naturally, since you two had to meet once or twice a week over it, the animosity between you two, or rather from your side, have slightly dissipated. All the contemptuous debates and snide remarks have been replaced with productive discussions and playful banters. That being said, you still maintain an arm’s length with him. Nothing good comes from getting close to a heartthrob, you reasoned.

“Did you see my email?” he asked.

“Oh sorry, I haven’t. Wait a sec,” you turned to your laptop, downloading the attachment, “Oh, so you’ve done preparing your parts already?” you mumbled, scrolling through his part of the slides that he just proposed to add a week ago, “this is—”

“Good?” he interjected, grinning smugly.

“Yeah,” you nodded, giving him a quick smile — probably a first, he thought.

“Well, you look very surprised I’m almost offended,” he propped his elbow against the table, his chin resting on his palm, “You must’ve thought there is nothing going on for me except for my looks huh?”

“And your wealth too, I might add,” you replied nonchalantly, typing away, “To be honest. I didn’t think you were going to do your part. In fact, I was so prepared to pull the all-nighters to pull off your parts in case you bail.”

“Wow,” he bemused, “You sure are colder and more tactless than you look. Thought we just needed some time but it’s still very business-like between us.”

“Well, I mean the only thing that holds us together is this project so -“

“So, let’s change that then,” he cut you off as he rose up, suddenly packing up your books and notes that were strewn across your table.

“Uh, what are you doing?” you looked up at him quizzically as he picked up your backpack from the ground and put the books and papers into your backpack as if it was his.

“I want us to be closer,” he winked before slinging your backpack over his shoulder while carrying his own backpack over the other shoulder.

“It’s 3 AM,” you protested, trailing behind him as he marched for the door.

“So? You usually leave late from the library anyway.”

“Yeah, studying,” you emphasized, trying to snatch your backpack away from him but he was too quick in dodging you. With a triumphant smile, he walked in a backwards manner, “come on, just some late-night snacks and some chit-chat that’s not macroeconomics. Don’t you think I deserve just that much considering how good of a project partner I’ve been? Even Jungwon can’t do half as good of a job.”

“I’d rather you be one of those freeloading group mate then,” you folded your arms, annoyed.

“Why do you hate me so much?” he finally asked, head cocking to the side.

“I don’t.”

“So you like me?”

“I also don’t.”

“Ouch.”

“Just give me my bag back,” you extended your hand, beckoning him to return your backpack.

He stared at your extended hand for a few seconds before grasping it instead, “Not a chance.”

“Hey-“ you shrieked as he pulled you along and exited the library. You sighed, relenting, letting him drag you towards the corner of the street just outside campus where a few food stalls were still opened, “What would you like?”

“Wait...” you stared at him in a mixture of disbelief and amusement, “The Park Sunghoon eats at stalls?”

“What?" he teased, "You weren’t expecting a Michelin-starred restaurant were you?”

“Of course not. I’m not you,” you scoffed, shaking his grasp off of your hand, “I’m just surprised you’re not as out of touch as I thought you were.”

“Trust me, I’m full of surprises,” he winked.

You rolled your eyes though you immediately changed your expressions as you turned towards the seller, beaming, “Can I get 2 Bungeoppangs please? Thank you.”

“Make that 4,” he added, offering the lady a wad of bills, beating you to it, “Oh it’s on me — I mean I’m the one who dragged you so late at night.”

Not a fan of being indebted, especially not to this Golden spoon , you quickly slip your money into his pocket, “Oh please, I’d never let you have that pleasure.”

“That’s fine,” he clicked his tongue, “I’ll just keep on dragging you for midnight snacks until you let me treat you. Here you go,” he grinned as he handed you the paper bag containing your orders. You scoffed realizing that he had just trapped you.

“So,” he started, beckoning you to join him to sit at the stairwell nearby which was looking out towards the distant cityscape — its lights twinkling like stars, “since you’re so hell-bent in showing that you don't like me, would you mind enlightening me on what you honestly thought of me?”

You stared at him in confusion, wondering what he was planning up his sleeves this time. Wiggling his eyebrows, he reassured, “oh trust me, you can’t hurt me so shoot away.”

“Fine,” you shrugged, “I thought you were a good-for-nothing airhead who floats through life all thanks to winning the genetic lottery and daddy's money."

He snorted before pressing his tongue against the inside of one cheek, staring at you with a look that seemed either he was proud of you or he just didn’t believe how vile your words could be, “Wow, and I thought I was tactless. You’re worse.”

Truth to be told, that initial negative impression of Sunghoon that you had, have already begun eroding the more you interacted with him. Instead of the arrogant, good-for-nothing airhead that you pictured him to be, Sunghoon turned out to be a smart, diligent and an agreeable lad, making you feel like a total prick for thinking otherwise. Not that you want to admit that to him though. His self-ego was already so inflated as it is.

“Don’t worry, this level of unbridled tactlessness is only reserved for those deserving of it — like you,” you plastered a smile before taking a bite of your food, surprised by how good it was.

“Well, it must have have hurt your pride to know that I am not just wealthy and handsome but also,” he paused for extra emphasis, “brainy and competent in, I dare say, everything.”

“You’re shameless,” you scoffed but the corner of your lips were uncontrollably lifting into an amused grin.

“Hey, being humble isn’t my thing,” he clicked his tongue.

“Yeah I mean, being humble isn’t on-brand for you. I guess some people are just born lucky to have the whole package.”

Suddenly, with a slight glint in his eyes, he uttered in a low voice, “if it’s of any consolation, I do have a major weakness. Would you like to know it?”

You held his gaze, unsure of whether he was serious, he was flirting or he was messing around, “I am pretty sure there is a catch to that.”

“Of course, you’re a good economist so you’d know that there is no such thing as free lunch,” he grinned smugly, leaning in closer, his lips just inches away from your ear, “it would cost you your life.”

“Wouldn’t even be interested in it even if it is free,” you whispered back.

With a grin that was unreadable, he leaned back, propping his back with his hands on the ground behind him, "you're like the personafication of the Great Wall or something, so hard to break.”

You just gave him a slight smile before continuing to stare at the view ahead, not minding his words. Sunghoon, on the other hand, had his eyes on you. Thinking quite literally of how hard it was to break the invisible barrier between you two. Sure, you were not as prickly as you initially were but it has been almost a month and the pace at which it was all developing was too slow for him. Just then his phone buzzed as a text had just come in.

Sir. It has been done. I’ve coaxed the tourism committee to give the spot to your university's dance society. Had to double the amount offered though. -Mr. Han.

Sunghoon was going to ignore the text but then another thought dawn on him, I should kick everything up a notch, he thought, as he fired a quick reply to Mr. Han:

That's fine. Need you to do something else asap. Will call you soon.

Patience was, afterall, never part of his virtue.

“I’m sorry,” Sunoo cried out for the umpteenth time over the phone, “I know I promised that tonight would be my treat but the head of the dance team isn’t satisfied with our performance so he’s making us practice until dawn. AGAIN.”

“Dude, it’s fine,” you reassured, making your way down the sidewalk, past the bus stop, “this could be your time to shine. There might be entertainment companies there so you might get scouted. All the more reason to practice hard until dawn.”

“That would have made all the all-nighters worth it,” he sighed, “Anyways, alright I won’t hold you any longer or else you’ll be going home even later. Point is, get a taxi okay? Don’t walk all the way back. You heard the news lately.”

“You are worrying about the wrong person,” you sung, “alright then, I’m going to cross the street now. See you in class tomorrow!”

Oddly enough while it was only 12 AM, the streets were already so eerily empty tonight, the silence of which was deafening. In fact, even after having walked for almost 10 minutes by the main road, you have yet to pass by a single vehicle nor person and it was beginning to fill you with trepidation. Perhaps the rising number of missing cases were really starting to instil fear and paranoia amongst the townsfolk, you thought.

While that has never deterred you from going home late or being alone since you were never the type to get easily scared, something felt awfully off tonight. Besides your neighbourhood resembling more and more like a ghost town the farther you walk, it was just too still, too quiet. When you reached the end of the alleyway that you usually use as a shortcut, you threw one last glance behind you, trying to make sure that no one had been following you. Thankfully, indeed no one had — filling you in with relief but making you feel stupid for being too paranoid. When you turn back around however, you almost bumped into a tall figure, all clad in black. “It’s awfully late to be walking all alone don’t you think?” he asked mockingly in a gritty voice.

Before you could even react however, his hand was already on your arm, his sharp nails digging into your skin. The next thing you knew he had dragged and yanked you to the side, into another darker alleyway where the dumpsters were. Pain shot all over you as you got hurled onto the hard gravelled path. Looming before you was the man, laughing deviously as he lowered himself. He was probably around 25, pale and gangly, with a rather sinister wide smile plastered over his face and an inhumane glint in his eyes like that of a cat's tapetum lucidum, glowing especially in the dark.

With adrenaline and fear now on overdrive, you sprang to your feet, ramming him out of the way with as much strength as you could muster, sending him tumbling backwards with a loud groan. Without sparing another second, you sprinted off, taking every turns you can take in the hopes that the non-linear path you had taken would have thrown him off your trails. For a moment it seemed to have worked for you did not see a hint of him when you looked back nor do you hear other footsteps beside yours.

You were in fact only a few meters away from the nearest exit when suddenly you felt someone grabbing you by the shoulder, pulling you with so much force to the side, before throwing you harshly against the cement wall. It was the maniac from earlier, still grinning like a Cheshire cat as if his lips had been permanently sewn to stretch that wide. With both hands on your collar, pressing hard against your neck, you can feel the air being squeezed out of your lungs as he was choking you, "I could've made it so painless but well - you decided to play around..."

You wanted to scream but with his hands pressed up on your throat, nothing came out. You thrashed wildly, hitting him wherever your hands could reach though nothing seemed to have worked. Gasping for air, you were so sure that you were going to die in a matter of seconds. Just then you saw another dark figure looming behind the maniac with his hand raised upwards, holdimg what seemed like a bat or a plank. Within seconds the bat or plank hit the maniac squarely on his back causing him to double down in pain. With his grip loosened, you fell harshly to the ground, the pain shooting everywhere but at least you were finally able to catch your breath. Though still light-headed from the lack of oxygen and still coughing and wheezing from being choked earlier, you spared no seconds to drag yourself away from the maniac.

You turned your attention to the other man, who was standing next to the maniac with the bat or plank still swinging in his hand as if he was deliberating on whether to deliver another blow to the maniac. But then instead, he turned towards you. While indeed he had saved you, your flight and fight response was still on overdrive and you backed away instinctively as he trudged up towards you.

"y/n, it's me."

You stopped retreating, recognizing the voice and the silhouette as he came closer.

"Sunghoon...?" you called out though still uncertain. Only when he lowered himself down to you level, his face catching the lighting from the other side, did you exhale a huge sigh of relief for indeed it was Sunghoon. Never had you ever been so relieved to see someone. "Sunghoon, how did-" you croaked but stopped as you noticed the maniac earlier had already gotten up and had started to sprint away. "the guy- the guy-" you stammered, voice hoarse.

Sunghoon cussed as he watched the man slowly disappear into the dark, "Just let him y/n. I can’t leave you alone here.”

“But—“ you stammered, as he helped you get up to your feet, “what if that man is behind all the disappearances? He might just move on to some other victim. We need to-”

“y/n,” he reassured, gently rubbing your shoulders as if comforting you, “Calm down okay? I hit him pretty hard on his back, I doubt he would continue tonight. I’ll also make sure to go straight to the police later alright? Come on.”

He draped your arm over the back of his neck while placing the other hand behind your back, trying to hold you steadily as you walked. While you tried to walk as normally as possible, the pain over your knee and hips grew with every step that you cannot help but wince.

"You're hurt," Sunghoon murmured, "Its' better if I carry you-"

“No,” you protested, “it’s okay, I can walk.”

“Your knee will bleed more with all the limping and hobbling,” he replied as a matter-of-factly. You looked down at your knee, only then realising that blood has streamed down your calves, staining your white socks red, “I’d piggyback you but you’d have to bend your knees and it would just hurt more so I’ll just carry you okay? Bear with me.” You suddenly feel his other hand behind your knees, the other wrapping itself over your back, before he pick you up in one effortless and swift swoop. It was embarrassing, you thought, but there was not much you can do.

Within a minute, you two finally got out of the dark alleyway as it opened up into a brightly-lit street, the corner where the 24-hour convenience store was. The harsh white fluourescent lights, which you have always hated, suddenly becoming a source of comfort and safety. He gently set you down on the bench just outside of the store, “I’ll go and buy you something to treat your wounds with alright? I’ll be quick, don’t worry. I can assure you, he won’t come back.”

You nodded weakly. Truth to be told, you didn’t want to be left alone. You were anxious that the man would just pop out and drag you again like he just did. Not that you said anything though. True to his words, Sunghoon appeared back not long after, running towards you with a plastic bag full of first aid kit items and some drinks, one of which he had taken out and opened up in advance for you, “Drink up first.”

You muttered a thanks, dawning it — not realising just how parched you were.

“Want to tell me what happened?” he asked as he watched you rummage to the plastic bag for the appropriate medication to apply.

“Had the misfortune to run into a crazed dude, that’s all,” you mumbled, taking out a bottle of alcohol disinfectant and some cotton swabs, then trying to open the seal of the former, “Thank you for earlier. Really thought I’d die.”

“Let me,” he offered, taking the bottle and swabs away from your hands before kneeling in front of you. You protested, telling him that you can do it yourself. He gave you a small smile, “your shaky hands indicate otherwise.”

You furrowed your brows, “no they’re not, lo-“ you grumbled bringing your hands up to show him. Unfortunately for you, Sunghoon was right, they were. Not to mention, you had scraped your palm pretty badly from the fall as well.

“As much as you try to put up an unfazed front, the body keeps score,” he muttered calmly as he gently apply the disinfectant on the cuts over your legs, “Don’t worry though. He won't reappear. Not when you’re with me out here.”

You winced as he moved on to apply the disinfectant on the big scrape over your knee, “Hold on yea? You took a really nasty fall with this one.”

As Sunghoon continued to patiently treat your wounds, you couldn't help but observe his every move and his every features — the only time you had ever actually properly looked at him. You realized then how large his hands were, how slender his fingers were and how meticulous and gentle every move and touch was as if you're glass and he was afraid to break you. Every now and then he would look up, meeting your gaze, giving you a quick reassuring smile that contrasts his usual smug grin.

Suddenly, you felt guilt creeping up. This was the guy whom you thought was an asshat. The guy that you, despite all that he had shown to prove otherwise, still had zero faith in. The guy that you refuse to give any time of the day except when necessary. Yet there he was, having saved you from death and as if that wasn't enough, was currently kneeling on the dirty pavement in his expensive get-up, just to tend to your cuts. It occured to you then that perhaps you should swallow your pride and accept the fact that you were the one who had made unfair judgements about Sunghoon. That your gut instincts were wrong. That he was indeed a good person, happen to be born with a golden spoon in his mouth.

Perhaps, you thought, you should also stop lying to yourself and admit that you have actually begun to not just not mind his presence around you, but actually enjoy it. That you were incredibly thankful and grateful that he was there right where and when you needed someone the most. Yet, steeped in pride and naturally unable to express your innermost emotions, all you could mutter was, “Your hands are freezing.”

He chuckled as he gazed up while holding your hand to apply a bandaid over the scrapes on your palm. With a gentle smile, one that is wide enough for you to notice that he had a dimple on his right cheek, he muttered, "well, yours aren't warm either."

For the first time ever, you did not find his smile to be annoying nor did you feel like smacking his hand away when it lingered too long on your skin.

Jay tiptoed across the wooden flooring that night, looking around to make sure no one caught him slipping in so late. After the number of missing persons cases, and of course after Sunghoon’s little stunts, Heeseung imposed some sort of hunting ban on them at least for a few weeks. Him sneaking around late would’ve earned him an earful from the elder considering how he is the most flamboyant and easy-to-tempt out of the bunch.

As he was about to take the stairs, he noticed the living room door, which was usually closed, ajar. The room was dark but through some momentary flashes of lightning outside, he noticed something suspicious on the floor in that room. He approached it slowly, noticing that they were empty blood bags which, as he followed, were leading up to Sunghoon, who was at the end of room, sitting on the ground with his upper body leaning against the couch. With his head thrown back against the seat cushion, Sunghoon looked almost lifeless had he not just opened his eyes to mere slits at the sound of Jay’s footsteps.

“DUDE! WHAT THE HELL!!!” Jay exclaimed, aggressively hitting the light switch in the room to turn it on, causing Sunghoon to groan over the sudden brightness and throw his arm over his eyes.

“You eat human blood for breakfast, what are you so startled about?” Sunghoon grumbled lethargically.

“I thought you got killed or something! This place looks like a crime scene! You look like a crime scene,” Jay complained, staring at him incredulously as he looked at all the emptied blood bags strewn beside Sunghoon’s body, “Were you starved or something?! I mean, look at the amount o— wait, did you take some of my supplies too?!”

Sunghoon scoffed, “I’ll repay you twice as much, don’t worry.”

“Forget about that,” Jay plopped himself on the couch, arms crossed, “I just hope that you have a good reason behind all of these uncivilised mess you’re creating.”

“Uncivilised?” Sunghoon chuckled drily, letting his arm fall to his side, eyes blankly staring on the ceiling, “Would have been even more uncivilised if I allow myself to lose it earlier.”

Jay rolled his eyes, “Hey, stop speaking in prose.”

Sunghoon sighed, “I almost lost it earlier. But I didn’t. And now, I’m paying the hefty price of suppressing it.” He swallowed thickly, the scent of your blood still so fresh in his mind. It was so enticing and intoxicating, he was starting to see red. Thank goodness, he had diligently been satiating himself daily with bagged blood. If not, he would have immediately lost it while tending to you. He planned on driving you back home but he knew he wouldn’t be able to withstand it any moment longer, especially not in such an enclosed space. So he sent his chauffeur to drive you home, telling you that he wanted to head to the police and quickly lodge the report before the maniac gets away far.

“Don’t tell me it’s that girl again?” Jay sighed — the silence of which just confirmed it.

“It’s weird though,” Sunghoon mumbled, “With all the blood I’ve drank tonight —“

“You still want hers?” Jay interjected, “Boy, I guess you’ve just found blood that is likely to be exactly your taste. You’re in trouble now — that hunger, if you don’t tend to, can fester in uglier ways. You got to-“

“Is it you again?” Heeseung suddenly barged into the room, his voice booming. Throwing a piece of shredded muddy black cloth on the ground, he glowered at Sunghoon, “the bloodless dead body in the river. Is it your doing?”

Sunghoon just sneered, knowing exactly who Heeseung was referring to, “that guy was the one causing ruckus as of late in this town, aren’t you glad that I caught him and put an end to him?”

“It could have been handled better by the elders. Who are you to take matters into your own hands instead?” Heeseung fumed, “Not that you did a good job anyway since you’ve drained him completely out of blood.”

“I know you didn’t kill him out of some noble reason Park Sunghoon,” Heeseung continued, lowering himself to Sunghoon’s level and grabbing a fistful of his collar, “You tempted him didn’t you? I heard it from Mr. Han. You told him about some girl being within the vicinity? All just so you can play hero for her so that you can tilt whatever game you’re playing with her in your favour, huh?”

“To be precise, I did not tell him that that girl was a meal,” Sunghoon emphasized, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, “I told him to scare her, that I’d offer him blood bags in exchange. He was more than eager to take it up for he was a starving mess. But well, apparently he was that parched, he went rogue and attacked her for real. If you consider that too, wouldn’t you say that I have saved another fellow human then?”

Heeseung scoffed, pulling the younger by the collar towards him as he glared menacingly at him, something unusual for the doe-eyed eldest to sport, “I told you stop playing games, didn’t I?”

“Guys, please,” Jay interjected, noticing the tension in the air, afraid of what were to come next, “We’re like fossil-aged, way past the time to be brawling. Heeseung, let him go -- for tonight at least. He's out of it right now.”

Heeseung pushed Jay’s hand away, harshly letting go of Sunghoon’s collar, “One more reckless move and I’ll take that as a your death wish Sunghoon.”

“I know I should be happy that you’re getting close to the guy of every girls’ and boys’ dreams,” Sunoo sighed, gesticulating wildly as you two walked towards the library the next evening, “but I have a bad feeling about Sunghoon.”

“He isn’t actually that bad,” you muttered quietly causing Sunoo to stare at you in aghast, “Okay okay, what happened to y/n? Did she get swapped with a double?”

“Stop overreacting,” you rolled your eyes, “It’s just because the deadline is approaching that we are spending more time together. Pretty sure we’ll be back to strangers after this.”

“I sure hope so,” Sunoo emphasized snidely, eyes narrowing into mere slits as if he was judging if there was any grain of truth to what you had just said. You shook your head dismissively as you two reached the entrance of the library door, “Alright, here’s my stop. Have a good practice tonight Sunoo.”

“Will do,” he pressed his lips together, forming a tight-lipped smile, before suddenly holding on to your arm stopping you halfway from passing through the library main entrance, “Wait… Just… Be careful okay? I know being alone is dangerous but… I feel like he’s not exactly the best company either.”

There was genuine concern in Sunoo’s eyes and voice which confused you. He was not always this protective nor paranoid especially when he has always been the one egging you to go on dates and talk to guys. You were going to say something when you felt someone standing behind you. “Oh sorry-“ you apologised as you turned your head, thinking you might have blocked someone’s way. But it was none other than Sunghoon who had just wedged himself between your back and the door as if holding it for you. He looked down at you, beaming, his dimples peeking through, “Hi — I was getting worried since you haven’t showed up.”

Noticing the unnecessary proximity, Sunoo protectively pulled you slightly to the side as he scoffed, “Don’t be dramatic. It’s only what? 10 minutes past 8 PM?”

You gave Sunoo a quick glance, signalling him to stop acting so sassy for no reason but he just ignored you, choosing to shoot daggers at Sunghoon instead.

“Well, she is never late so my worries are justified,” Sunghoon calmly remarked, “even more so when she’s just had a run-in with a maniac yesterday.”

Sunoo chewed the inside of his lower lip in guilt. While he did feel guilty about it all day, offering to treat you to the most expensive restaurants in town, and even planning to march to the police station to demand quick action, you were quick to calm him down by reassuring him that you were completely alright. That the maniac had not hurt you. That all the cuts and bruises are merely from, you lied, having clumsily fell to the ground while running away and not because you got thrown to the ground. But now, the guilt was creeping back up. Especially with the way Sunghoon said it. Had this been any normal day, Sunoo would have definitely retorted a smart comeback at Sunghoon but the guilt lodged his throat up so he just stared away, turning to you instead, plastering a fake smile, “Well, I’ll go now then. Don’t go home too late and call me when you get home later yeah?”

You nodded, smiling back as a reassurance, “same to you Sunoo. Text me once you’re home.”

Sunghoon’s smile faltered seeing the genuine care you two shared. He hated seeing the way you softly beam at Sunoo, the way you gently speak to him, the way you two touch one another so casually.

He wanted to be in Sunoo’s place.

You two ended up staying until midnight at the library, too engrossed in building perfect arguments for your respective parts — one another sometimes taking on a contrarian role to find each others’ loopholes. This goes on since that day, eventually becoming the norm as of late: you and him alone in the library together — three odd combinations that no one would believe unless they see it with their own eyes. You two no longer sat apart, you two were always next to each other in the library. All the heated debates from past weeks had now evolved into productive ones. All the glares and sneers turned to genuine awe, nods and even laughter. All the snide remarks turned to playful banters. It was weird, you thought, how this had all turn out and how quickly it progressed between you two.

“You were right, there were inconsistencies, I’ll fix it then,” he nodded, scribbling some points on his printed draft.

“Sorry,” you muttered sheepishly, worried if you’d been too overcritical.

“Don’t be. Better to be pointed out by one another than by the professor don’t you think?”

You find your lips curling into a smile almost automatically, impressed at just how cool-headed he was. Usually you would have to be extra careful of being critical of your partners’ work lest they become offended nor defensive but Park Sunghoon was different. He does his job and not only that, if he indeed saw how valid your criticisms were, he willingly accept it and gladly revise it. Feeling your smile stretching wider than you would have liked, you turned away, your eyes landing on the big clock near the door, “Oh shit, it’s 4 AM.”

Sunghoon looked up nonchalantly, shrugging, “Well, the guard isn’t around to bark at us, might as well overstay.”

“Well, if he comes out, he’ll definitely do more than bark at us. The library should’ve been closed 2 hours ago!” You panicked, packing your things up. Sunghoon extended his hand over to yours, stopping you, “trust me. He won’t be around. For a little while at least.”

You narrowed your eyes at him, “Did you make a deal with him or something? Why are you always so confident about this?”

He grinned coyly, “Not exactly a deal but I am definitely sure that he won’t be coming around.”

You shook your head dismissively, slipping your hand off his grasp, “Whatever it is. It is late and I should head back soon.”

The smile on Sunghoon faltered, visibly disappointed but he followed suit anyway, packing up. As you two walked towards the exit, the guard was indeed nowhere to be found but it was something to be grateful for anyway especially when you have overstayed your time so you didn’t think much about it.

“What are you doing?” you asked as you two were outside, noticing that Sunghoon was still walking beside you towards the direction of the road leading up to your area, instead of the other way where his car was usually parked.

He stared back nonchalantly, shoving his hands into his pockets, “walking you home duh.”

“Um don’t,” you stopped, “our places are like the opposite way.”

“As if I’d let you walk home alone after what happened the other day,” he scoffed, shaking his head.

“So you’d rather walk me back?” you raised your brows quizzically, “it’s going to be a 45 minute return journey for you to go back here.”

“I can take the taxi afterwards, or we can take the taxi now,” he shrugged, “Well, it will all be easy if you just swallow your pride and let me drive you back home but you were dead set on not wanting to ride in my car.”

You scoffed. Sometimes, talking with Sunghoon really felt like engaging in mind games — like he knows just how to frame the issue to make you feel bad or to make you pick the choice that would make him win. “Fine, I’ll save you the troubles then,” you heaved a huge exasperated sigh, “Just this once though.”

Sunghoon smirked, nodding and mouthing a ‘sure’, before he led you towards his G-Wagon.

“I can’t believe I have become another statistic,” you muttered to yourself as you entered his car.

“Of?”

“Of the girls that rides in Sunghoon’s car,” you grumbled, slightly struggling with the seatbelt when suddenly you saw his hand reaching over. You turned, about to protest, but was quickly shut up by how close his face was to yours with his body just mere inches away from yours. He pulled the seatbelt over you and as the seatbelt clicked, his eyes flitted away from the seatbelt to your eyes, darting momentarily to your lips before reverting, causing your heart to skip a beat, “You’re the first actually.”

Your eyebrows twitched in disbelief as he backed away, grinning smugly as if he knew the effect the move had on you. You cleared your throat, trying to sound unfazed, “with the amount of girls you’ve dated — you should’ve chose a better lie to tell me.”

“Believe it or not,” he shrugged while firing off the engine, “people usually want me more than I want them so I'd get driven around instead. That, or I'd get my chaffeur to drive me around using my family's usual chaffeured car."

“Still not having any faith in that,” you maintained, “but if it is true, then I don’t know if I should feel bad for ruining that clean streak or feel triumphant that I am the one ruining the clean streak.”

“It’s up to you,” he clicked his tongue, pressing on the gas pedal, “Let’s just say, if I wanted to. I could’ve called my chauffeur to drive us in the usual car or called up a private taxi.”

You stared at him, wondering what was he getting at. He gave you a quick glance as if trying to emphasise his point, “But I didn’t.”

It felt like he was trying to smooth talk his way to your head but you thought skeptically that he had no reason to so you decided to just ignore it, looking out of the window instead. While a few days have passed since that night, seeing the streets and alleyway where it happened always brought the terrifying memories back. You gulped, staring away immediately, squeezing your hands to calm yourself down. That apparently did not go unnoticed by Sunghoon, “You okay?”

“Yeah, of course,” you answered immediately, trying to think of other things than what happened the other night.

“I guess you were still affected by it?” he asked. Suddenly you feel his free hand enveloping yours while the other stayed on the steering wheel. His hand was cold but somehow it still gave some form of comfort, “regardless of how you try to mask it, your body keeps score y/n.”

You stared down at the way his big hand enveloped both of yours, slightly irked by the fact that you let him and also slightly irked by how comforting and calming it felt. Despite that though, unlike the usual times when you would have definitely moved your hand away, this time you didn’t. Even when his hand was freezing cold to the point that it was quickly seeping any little warmth your hands had.

You guys finally reached your place in about 10 minutes time. You muttered a quick thanks, suddenly remembering that you had wanted to give him something as a token of gratitude after incident the other night. You deliberated for a long time on what to get this cocky, rich kid, thinking that whatever he really wanted you probably couldn’t afford. Noticing how he always drank Americano in campus, you decided to get him a one-month worth of coffee voucher from the campus cafe.

“Seriously?” he looked up from the voucher to you, eyebrows raising quizzically.

“What? Not enough?” You answered blankly, slightly worried.

“Not that,” he sighed, “I just… I don’t need material things like that.”

“Thought this would be the best functional gift that won’t cost me my liver,” you said jokingly, “I mean, you drink Americano all the time, right?”

Yeah, because it’s so dark-coloured it hides any traces of blood I usually sneakily put in, he thought to himself when you asked again, “Well, anyway, I still need to thank you though so tell me what you want Sunghoon? Anything within moral bounds and within my tax bracket, that is.”

With an eyebrow twitch and a playful smirk that, by now, you are able to interpret as him having a rather cheeky idea in mind, he said, “I haven’t had a home-cooked meal in a while. How’s that as a token of appreciation instead?”

You paused, blinking confusedly. He raised his brows, “you live alone, you should know how to cook right? Unless of course, you’ve been living off meal replacements or deliveries.”

“No of course I know how to cook. I’m not rich to be able to conveniently live off deliveries” you replied dismissively, “but, really? Home-cooked meals? That’s uh-“

“You said anything I want,” he cut you off, “that’s all I want. Simple isn’t it? I didn’t ask for no Michelin-starred dinners nor a Balenciaga.”

You sighed, relenting, “Okay okay fine. I can’t promise that it will taste as nice as restaurants though. When do you want it? I’ll send it over to your place or something.”

“You can just cook it for me live,” he deadpanned.

“So you want to see me cook it too? You’re so demanding,” you grumbled.

“Better to eat it fresh, no? Plus we get to bond more,” he quipped, “Well, if you’re uncomfortable of having me in your place then you can do it at mine?”

“Dude, both are just as questionable,” you objected.

“I can hire a kitchen space then if you like,” he offered.

“Damn, golden spoon kids are really of a different breed altogether,” you scoffed, “fine, just this once. I guess, I can let you come over.”

You grimaced just after saying that. You’re a pretty closed-off person, preferring to set boundaries on things including your personal space like your home so having to let someone breach that, especially that someone being Sunghoon was such a blow to you. But he did save you, so you definitely did owe him big time.

“If you’re not too tired, can I ask for it now?” He smirked.

You raised your brows, looking at your watch, “It’s almost 5 AM now.”

“Yeah, we both haven’t had dinner,” he nodded as a matter-of-factly, “also I heard your stomach rumbled a few times earlier.”

“Oh shut up,” you chuckled, ruminating for a bit, “I guess. I mean, it’s Sunday now — so I can just sleep in in the morning.”

Hence, that was why Sunghoon was at your place at the crack of dawn, looking around your humble accommodation with stars in his eyes. “I don’t know whether to be offended or not by just how much in awe you are of my place considering how you live in a mansion,” you shook your head.

“Your place is so warm and cosy — and I mean it in the best way,” he replied, looking at the books that filled your shelves up to the brim, “my place is just cold and empty. Even when it’s designed and filled with everything anyone can possibly want.”

“First world problems huh?” You remarked sarcastically at him as you opened your fridge which you had thankfully stocked up yesterday.

“You’re very well-read aren’t you,” he asked, his fingers tracing the spine of the books he knew well for he, too, loved reading during his spare time. In fact, he was already born when some of the classics which you have in your shelf were first printed.

You shrugged, “just felt stupid most of the time so I have to constantly read up on things. I enjoy them too so it’s a win-win.”

He scoffed incredulously, “you’re one of the smartest person I’ve personally known, you shouldn’t put yourself down like that.”

Noticing you staring at him, he just smiled, wiggling his brows, “what?”

“You really need to drop all the sweet talks,” you shook your head disapprovingly as you switched on the stove, “it may work on others but not on me okay? Not when it comes from you.”

“They’re not sweet talks,” he gave you a quick playful glance before sitting on the stool near you, observing your every move, “so nothing to drop right?”

You exhaled sharply, deciding to ignore him again. He smiled to himself, enjoying the sight. Everything just felt so warm and cozy — literally and symbolically. It was a feeling he hadn't felt for a long time since every thing always felt too distant, too cold and too empty for him — be it places or people.

Obviously, being a vampire, food offers no satisfaction nor satiation at all so he never liked doing it. But he thought it was the perfect way for him to linger around you a little longer than usual, a perfect way to get a little deeper into your life which to him was still shrouded in so much mystery. Usually he would have to spike his food with blood just to get the eating part done and over with but with you, over stories, jokes, laughter and banters, he gobbled it up without, not even realizing that so much time had passed and that the sun have already risen.

“Let me,” Sunghoon muttered when you gathered the plates by the sink, about to wash it once you guys finished your meal. You shook your head, “no don’t worry about it.”

You then felt his body against your back, his hand reaching over to grab the dishes you were rinsing in your hand, his head leaning low towards your level. Suddenly becoming hyperaware of the way his chest was pressing against your back, you were forced to acquiesce, suddenly feeling shy, “Sure, just don’t break them.”

You scooted to the side, taking a nearby clean cloth to dry out the plates that he had just washed, “Wow, I’m surprised you know how to do the dishes.”

He chuckled drily, pressing on the dish soap dispenser, “it’s not rocket science. I know how to do the laundry too, would you like to see that?”

"No thanks," you shook your head dismissively, "Pretty sure other girls would die for a shot of that though."

“You should stop trying so hard you know,” he mumbled suddenly.

“Huh? At what? The project? We’re this close to-”

“No,” he deadpanned, “At keeping me at arm’s length.”

You gave him a momentary glance which he took as an affirmation so he continued as he dried his hand on a napkin nearby, “Can’t you see that maybe our fates are meant to intertwine? If it’s already fated, you can’t outrun it no matter how fast you run. So might as well just go with it.”

You didn’t reply to that immediately as what he had just said was indeed something that floated in your mind once or twice over the past few weeks. No matter how hard you try, especially given how you have a very risk-averse and rather preventative attitude, he was just always around that your efforts just end up futile. Sometimes you wonder if perhaps you are indeed destined to get closer to him, to be friends instead of just course mates? But then again, regardless of that and your gradually improving relations and perception of Sunghoon, you can never fully shake the nagging feeling at the pit of your stomach. That everything is just too good to be true that it almost feels like a set up. Like you’re a rat in a maze.

“I’m not keeping you at arm’s length,” you finally said, "I just take a long time to warm up."

"Ages," he emphasized, "Thank God, I have eternity."

You scoffed thinking that he was being sarcastic when he had actually meant it literally that he had eternity.

“So we’re friends?” he asked, leaning against the counter next to you. You shrugged, “I guess?”

“Then would you let me crash on your couch?”

“You are really shameless aren’t you?” You scoffed. He chuckled as he walked towards the living room and plopped himself on the couch, “just until the sun’s up high. I’m on a food coma right now and I’m a bit sleep-deprived lately, I don't think I can drive safely.”

You opened your mouth to protest, feeling slightly uncomfortable at the thought but considering the risk of him driving while having no sleep and having just eaten made you think twice. You reluctantly agreed, “I guess. No funny business okay?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he nodded, before the usual smirk starts enveloping his lips, “For safety measures just lock your door alright?”

“You’re relentless,” you scoffed, throwing the cloth at him as you switched off the lights in the kitchen. “I’ll head to my room alright. Just lock the main door when you leave later. No need to inform me or anything.”

Already laying down on your tan couch, he flashed his thumbs up. He watched you walk past the hallway into your bedroom thinking just how far he had gotten just from saving you, from making you feel indebted. Should have done it way back, he thought to himself, would have saved some time.

Obviously, being a vampire, he would never get food-coma nor would he feel sleep-deprived so indeed they were all just excuses. Excuses to stay around longer. Unknowingly a smirk was enveloping his lips as he placed both hands under his head in a leisure manner. If only you knew just how much danger you were putting yourself in right now, he thought. The smirk faltered the longer he stared at your closed door, boring holes into it as he felt something within him brewing. Suddenly, the memory of just how intoxicatingly tempting your blood had smelled like resurfaced, causing his mouth to water. Such a perfect timing, he thought, you and him alone, in the dead of the dawn. No one to hear you scream, no one to help you. As such thoughts brew into the usual toxic mix, he can feel his throat drying up, suddenly becoming so parched, while his gums tingled — signs that the his fangs were unfolding into its full length.

Shit, he thought, he was going to lose it soon. He immediately got off the couch, summoning every bit of strength and rationality he had to fight his carnal desires to not just break your door and attack you. In a frantic hurry, he left your apartment, got on his car and fired on the gas pedal as if the cops were after him. Jay must have been right, he thought, there must have been something about your blood that really piqued his senses since he has not even tasted it and yet this was how far and low it had driven him. He scoffed at himself, clutching the steering wheel.

That aside though, what is still mysterious to him was why he even stopped himself. Everything was falling into place so impeccably like he always wanted: he got your guards down and he got you to trust him — it would have been a perfect opportunity since it was at your own place too. Like inviting a lion to your own house, it would have been the ultimate “I told you so” to her. And yet, instead of doing just that, he ended up fighting every last bit of rationality and conscience back there, to not let his predatory self took over and lay a hand on you.

Perhaps, he wanted to taunt you a little longer, he thought.

Or perhaps, he had grown to enjoy your company.

“Oh my God, that clicks!” Sunoo exclaimed, gasping as he shuffled through the wad of papers on his table, “look, it’s the same like what you saw! Tall guy, clad in all black, gangly, mid-20s, eerily wide smile, a disturbingly gritty voice, bony hands, and glowy-ish eyes!”

“I guess,” you shrugged, taking another bite of the matcha brownie that Sunoo just got you from the cafe beside the Press Society Club Room. You had some time to spare after your last seminar class so you decided to give your bestfriend a visit. That being said, instead of some meaningful catching-up, he was busy badgering you with questions about that night when you were attacked — bribing you with your favourite matcha brownie and coffee, “I mean — since you’ve gotten all these info from these witnesses, don’t you think the police are already on his tail investigating this or something?”

Ni-Ki, the other guy in the room who was busy toggling with his DSLR, scoffed, “If the police are even a fraction as useful, you wouldn’t end up running into that man at all because some of these witnesses have reported their encounters like as far as 2 months ago.”

Ni-Ki is Sunoo’s close friend, a polar opposite that he got quickly close to given their similar hobbies which made them members of the same clubs: Dance Society and Press Society. Ni-Ki is skinny and tall, with pouty lips, sharp eyes, and deep voice. He wasn’t the easiest to approach given how he has a rather intimidating resting face but whenever you bump into him, he had always been very cordial: greeting you first and engaging in conversations with you. You clicked your tongue, “shit, you’re right. So what are you guys planning then? I mean all these reports, the articles, the pictures — that’s not just prep for some 1/4 page feature.”

“Bingo,” Sunoo snapped his fingers, beaming proudly as he tapped onto the mountain of papers in front of him, “It will be the next hottest special article from us. After that scum tried to kill my best friend, best believe I won’t stay put.”

You gave Sunoo a small smile, one that shows how appreciative you were but also one that was slightly concerned by how ambitious it all was, “I mean not to doubt you two since you guys have co-authored some of the best articles ever written by the School’s paper but what could the school paper cover that hasn’t been in the official press? And like what could a school paper do with its limited exposure anyway? Wont you guys just be, I dont know, fear mongering?”

“I knew it, if anyone would raise these kind of questions, it would be my smart bestie,” Sunoo smirked, as if already expecting the question and already having the answers prepped, “First things first, the press have done a shoddy job at reporting these cases — like all the alarming facts were just glazed over, no connections were made, no alarms were sound — nothing. It was weird, it’s like they didn’t care or something.”

“If you ask me, I would think that both the police and the press were eating from the same hand this time,” Ni-Ki chimed in, eyebrows wiggling as he mouthed the word “corruption”.

“Anyways,” Sunoo continued, “as I was saying, basically we had to do a lot of digging because apparently not a lot of news covered the important details such as the autopsy report, God knows why. We found that some of these bodies are reported to be almost bloodless, with some odd cuts over their necks but even that wouldn’t have been enough to leak that much blood out of the human body. Even bizarrely, there are no traces of their blood around the area which then brings the assumption that this was a rather well-planned murder, not a spur of the moment one, because it is likely that the body has been taken elsewhere, drained of blood then dumped elsewhere. In other words, with more than one killings being like this, we are definitely not dealing with just any normal murderer."

“Sounds good,” you nodded in agreement, pondering over the papers sprawled over the counter, “You guys will also be putting a question mark on a story, it will definitely get people talking-“

Your phone suddenly rang. You stared at it quizzically, trying to figure out who the unregistered number belonged was but decided to just take it, “Hello? Who is this?”

“Not sure if I should feel offended that you don’t recognise my voice or that you’re not here right now when we’re supposed to meet?”

It was indeed a very familiar voice. You pored your head over who that voice could belonged to and who could you be meeting with at almost 7.30PM. “Oh shoot, right Sunghoon sorry. I’ll be right there in 5-10 minutes.”

It would actually be the last night that you and Sunghoon would be working together since the deadline of your work will be by 9AM tomorrow. All hunched up in the usual desk by the large windows of the East Wing in the library, you felt a hint of pensiveness at the thought. Working with Sunghoon, have after all been such a breeze: he was smart, accommodating and cooperative — everything you could ever want from a project partner. Not to mention, as much as you didn’t want to admit, what made your time with him a little bit enjoyable and memorable than you expected was the fact that he turned out to be a decent person. Full of wit, charm, playfulness and worldliness — which you never expect someone with a pretty and wealth privilege like his would ever possess.

Deeply concentrating in finalising your joint-work, you didn’t even realise that midnight had rolled in until your concentrations were abruptly halted by the guard roughly knocking both of your tables. You jumped in your seat, realizing that this had been the first time you had seen him in quite a while, “Sorry guys, didn’t you see the notice outside? We’re closing at 12.30 AM tonight due to some maintenance work. Go pack up now.”

You heaved an exasperated sigh as you reluctantly closed your laptop shut, “we were so close though.”

“We can continue some place else,” Sunghoon answered calmly as he packed his things up.

“You’re right,” you agreed as you slung your backpack over your shoulder and walked next to him down the aisle, “Do you know any cafe that closes late nearby?”

“Bars do,” he grinned as he propped the door open, beckoning you to pass, “I wasn’t thinking of cafes by the way.”

Suddenly he grabbed the backpack that was loosely slung over your shoulder, slinging it over his instead, “I was thinking of my place.”

You paused, blinking quizzically at him, trying to process if you had heard wrongly.

“You didn’t hear wrongly,” he uttered as if he could read your mind, “Why? Are you scared?”

“I’d rather go to the bar.”

He snickered, “yeah right. Come on, my place is only 5 minutes away and our deadline is 9 AM tomorrow.”

“What about your housemates?”

“Not to brag,” he smirked, “but I was talking about my other house, my own personal apartment where I usually stay at if I need some time alone.”

You pondered as you trailed slowly behind him. Indeed, he has by then proven numerous times just how much of a decent person he was which meant that being alone with him in his place should not be an issue. That being said, you still have this nagging feeling deep seated within you that still seemed to be warning you to not let your guard down — to stay away. But then you thought about how you guys were like only a quarter away from being done with the project and that you had spent countless times alone with him during which nothing happened so you just chalked up such feeling into irrational paranoia, yet again.

“I guess,” you acquiesced, “Just until we finish our work.”

Sunghoon’s apartment differed vastly from the bachelor pad he shared with his little clique. Located at the top floor of the most expensive apartment complex in the area, his penthouse which was designed in an industrial architecture style, was spacious and had a dark colour scheme throughout — almost monochromatic, giving off a rather clean and sleek look but a bit too dark and cold even for someone like you who had always gravitated towards darker colours schemes.

“Okay, I mean I know you’re rich but this is just on a whole new level. Now I’m even more offended at the way you stare around my place in awe last time. You must have felt like a tourist — exploring how the average Joe lives on a student budget,” you blabbered, swivelling around slowly to take a good look at his lofty penthouse. Its curtains automatically drew open as you approach the floor-to-ceiling windows of the open space, revealing the glorious view of the city and a nearby river at night, “If I were you, I’d rather live here than that rowdy bachelor pad of yours with your little clique.”

“I overthink a lot so I need their rowdiness in my life to drown it.”

You looked at him beside you, detecting a slight sad undertone, “You have everything anyone could possibly want and you’re still overthinking things?”

“Oh trust me, not everything,” he turned towards you with a small smile, “would trade all I have for that one thing to be honest.”

“Is this the same with your weakness?” You raised your eyebrows, “the one you told me would cost my life?”

“Yeah,” he nodded with a sly grin, “they’re kind of related. So? What do you say? Want to take up the offer?”

“No thanks,” you shook your head dismissively. Setting your backpack on the counter nearby, taking out your laptop and notes, “let’s get working, I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

“Oh please, you can overstay all you want dear,” Sunghoon answered in a sing-song voice. You shot him a glare over the last word to which he just winked at. Sunghoon initially recommended that you two work in the study room or lounge room, where it would be more comfortable but you insisted to stay in the living room — actually feeling more comfortable in the open space area, closer to the main door, rather than anywhere deeper and isolated. You two immediately got immersed in your work, not realising that time flew by across all the debates, discussions, amendments, revisions and banters. Only after having amended and revised the paper almost a billionth time now did you guys finally run out of things to amend.

“Or maybe our brain is just too fried for this already,” you heaved a heavy sigh as your scrolled down the 15-page report, “Shall we?”

“After you, you’re the main Architect,” he gesticulated for you to press the submit button. You dismissed him, grabbing his hand, “Hey, I do love to play Sherlock but for this project, there ain’t no Watson. We are both the main architect of it. We are both Sherlocks.” You assured, beaming as you placed his hand on the mouse and then yours on his, guiding the cursor to the ‘submit’ button through his hand and clicking it after you received his final nod.

“Okay…. Now I can just hibernate,” you heaved a huge sigh of relief as you leaned back against the couch with your head thrown back, eyes closed. He stared at you all slumped on the couch, finding himself smiling as if endeared. He plopped himself next to you, his body facing you while his head rest on his palm with his elbows propped against the head rest. Though his eyes immediately fixated itself on your exposed neck, it was also increasingly distracted by your face. At your lips to be precise, which were parted and looked plush, looking almost inviting. He swallowed thickly, feeling some sort of gravitational pull all of a sudden.

“Stop staring, I can feel you burning holes,” you grumbled lethargically.

“You were, too,” he replied. You can hear his smirk from the tone of his voice. You opened your eyes, slightly startled as it immediately met his gaze. He was, as usual, unfazed, “At Jay’s party. You were gawking remember?”

“Okay first things first,” you straightened up and then turned to him, “I was not gawking nor snooping around. You were the one making out in a rather public space. You can’t blame me if I walk into you. I mean if you’re so shy about it, you should’ve made out in one of the rooms.”

“Did you like what you see?” He grinned slyly, “because you were staring for quite a long time.”

“I was not,” you retorted, “okay maybe I did stare for like just a second too long. But that wasn’t because of you guys making out — I was just thinking — “

“That Sunghoon bones the Cheer captain for grades?” he interjected so casually.

“Exactly. You took the words straight out of my mouth,” you said dryly, “Are you a mind reader or something? How is it that you can always tell what I am going to say.”

He shrugged with a smug grin on his face, “I just have a long experience with a lot of people. That and an unhealthy liking for Psychology.”

“Ah, that explains your penchant for mind games.”

“Well, it takes two to tango,” he said, biting the smile that was blooming on his face, “you’re good at it too.”

You were going to reply him with something but suddenly you became hyperaware of the way he was staring into your eyes. While getting stared at by Sunghoon was nothing new to you, the way he just kept gazing into your eyes as if trying to probe the depth of your mind was starting to make you feel self-conscious. There was almost this dopey, dreamy and dazed look to it which Sunoo had always told you is a warning sign to look out for. It’s kind of the look of awe and if you let it linger for a second longer, that gaze would probably change into something else — one which just screams that they want to get in your pants, Sunoo explained once, earning him a loud smack on the back by yours truly. You gulped, eyes blinking nervously as you start to feel something shifting in the atmosphere. While you were sure that seducing you would be the last thing in that campus heartthrob’s mind, it did made you feel nervous so, while feigning nonchalance you rose up and start to pack, “well, since we’re done, I should get going.”

“You can just stay,” he prompted ever so casually — which should be unsurprising as he has probably said that to other girls like millions of times (or vice versa). Standing by the counter where your backpack was, you begun shoving your books and stationaries inside, mumbling “Don’t be silly. The sun will be up in about an hour and a half.”

“Exactly,” he emphasized. You feel him coming up behind you, his body just mere inches away from your back, making you slightly nervous, “stay until sunrise then. There are no buses at this hour and taxis would just rip you off.”

“In a place so luxurious like this, I’d sleep like a baby and end up missing my 2PM class later so it’s a hard pass,” you rambled, saying absolutely anything out of nervousness. You slung your backpack over your shoulders and turned around, ready to leave but he didn’t budge and when you were angling to walk past him, he extended his arm, resting his hand against the counter behind you, blocking you, “why the haste y/n? Anything wrong?”

You would have stuffed up another lie but you find yourself instantly silenced when you looked up at him, meeting his gaze that had by then changed into something more unnerving. Long gone were those soft gazes. Perhaps it was the fact that he towered over you and was looking down at you but his hooded gaze was so intense and almost domineering, slightly sultry too, that it felt almost invasive and unsettling.

Sunghoon however felt the opposite, if his expressions and body language hadn’t given that away already. While staring at you was nothing out of ordinary for him to do, perhaps the way your relationship had progressed made the feat all the more addictive — as if your eyes were hypnotic or something. As if it was an ocean and all he wanted was to swim in it. He didn’t even notice that a thunder had just struck outside for all he see was you.

“It’s the crack of dawn Sunghoon,” you tried to diffuse the situation, feeling the tension in the air getting heavier, “I don’t have the bandwidth for your Mind Games.”

“We can always cut the chase,” he drawled, gradually lowering his face down, inching closer to yours. You noticed his stare flitting from your eyes to your lips, then back again with his gaze multiplying in intensity each time. You suddenly feel his other free hand come up to your shoulders, grasping the strap of your bag.

“What are yo-“ you fumbled, about to shove his hand off but his other hand was quick enough to grab your hand away as the other pulled your bag strap down your arm, letting it drop to the floor. He then took a few steps closer towards you, forcing you to retreat back. “Sunghoon, stop it-“ you cautioned. There was no mistaking his intent now as he placed his hand on the counter behind you, resting on either side of your waist, completely trapping you.

“Your guard dog is always this close to you, why are you suddenly shy when it comes to me?” He egged.

It would be a lie to say you weren’t unnerved but you weren’t one to just easily show any sign of fear nor vulnerability so you curtly replied, "I thought you said you’re good in Psychology but you seem to not know the difference between shyness and disgust.” you replied curtly as your mind went on overdrive, piecing puzzles of your past, specifically all the moments with him that seemed too inorganic to be coincidence and too good to be true. From Jungwon getting hospitalised suddenly; him becoming your new project partner; the security guard being missing most of the time; the maniac; him saving you; and now, it all culminated, to this. You swallowed thickly, still not wanting to believe that he could be this devious and manipulative — that it’s all just you and your usual unreasonable cynicism.

Sunghoon scoffed, pressing his tongue against the inside of his cheek as his lips slowly curl into a wry grin before it all faltered. With a twitch of an eyebrow, he inched his face closer to your level, cautioning you in a low voice, “you should be careful with your mouth — you think you can win a game with the person who created the playing field in the first place?”

With that, it all then fell into place. You weren’t too cynical nor paranoid. Your gut feelings had indeed been right all along — as if it was warning you of the malice he is capable of, of the malice he will do to you. But it was too late for you have willingly walked into the tiger’s dent. “you call that a game? It was just child’s play,” you spat, “All of your orchestrations, all the effort — they’re not working. Because if they did, I’d buckle right now for you — like all the other girls. But that isn’t the case is it? All I feel right now is an ever-greater contempt and disgust for you, in case you’re socially inept to have not picked that up from my facial expressions and body language.”

You feel a sense of triumph when you see his smug grin faltered within seconds, eyebrows twitching as if your words had seared exactly where his pride was. But such sense of triumph was short-lived. You can see now that that apparently was not the wisest move for his eyes darkened in a mixture of vehemence and lust — a concoction of thoughts and feelings rarely felt in tandem for him. He hated your guts but the intensity of the vehemence was somehow fuelling his existing attraction towards you — it was like a vicious self-reinforcing spiral.

Now, Sunghoon wasn’t one to make rash moves. He was always so cautious. Every moves are often well-calculated and schemed. But at that time, it didn’t matter anymore. All he saw was red and all he wanted right now was to shut you up — in a way you loathe the most, of course. Wrapping his hand behind your neck, he crashed his lips onto yours, the warmth of which was gradually enveloping all his senses, pushing it into new highs, making him hungry for more. You froze, unable to immediately register the sudden unexpected move he had pulled. Only when his other hand slipped itself on the small of your back to pull you even closer, leaving minimal to no spaces in between, did you finally snap out of it and react. While you tried to push him off with as much strength as you could muster, he did not budge at all. He was after all bigger than you and stronger so any push or punch you threw were futile against him.

If anything, it seemed to embolden him even more with his kiss growing more intense and fierce. All the frustrations, contempt and attraction that was building up to this moment, was fuelling his hunger and desire even more that it was almost carnal as he pushed his body up against you, pressing you uncomfortably against the countertop. With flight and fight response now on overdrive, you balled your hands into fist, hitting him wherever your hand could land which forced him to loosen his restrains on you as he tried to take your hands away. This gave you the opportunity to peel yourself away from his grasp especially since he was getting too delirious.

“you fucking prick.” you spat, managing to free yourself and immediately rushing to the other side, all breathless. You harshly wiped your throbbing lips with the back of your hand, feeling disgusted and slightly dazed.

Sunghoon smirked at the sight. You looked as ruined as he wished you to be: lipstick smudged, hair slightly dishevelled, and your shirt was sliding off one shoulder as the top button came undone in your struggle earlier. “You see, I’m not a patient person,” he took a step towards you, “but I’m glad I’ve dragged this whole thing out. The look of betrayal and disgust on your face — it’s so…. gratifying to see.” He chuckled menacingly, suddenly reminded of the look of disgust that you flashed at him at the night of the party.

Your brows knit in alarm and disgust. Sensing another danger coming as you see the hunger in his eyes emblazoning, you made a dash towards the main door.

“I’m not done with you!” you hear him scream across the hall as you grasp the large handle of the door, feeling hopeful that you could make it as the sound of his voice indicated that he was still in the living room but to your horror, just within a few seconds of opening the door, it shut back close with such a force. You didn’t know how he had got to the door so fast but you can feel him behind you, his large hand resting just above the handle, preventing you from reopening it. You feel your breath hitch as you feel his breath on your ear, “I said I’m not done with you."

“Let. Go. You. Fucking. Scum.” you seethed. You were going to elbow him right in the ribs, which could’ve bought you time to escape, but unfortunately this was Sunghoon you were dealing with. Not only did he manage to block your blow but as he grasped your arm, he harshly spun you around, slamming your back hard against the wooden door — his large hands pinning yours against it.

“Playtime’s over dear,” he drawled menacingly, his gaze now steely and cold — sending shivers down your spine. He thought he smelled something and he was right: your blood. He scoffed as his eyes zeroed into your lips where blood had formed on the crack at the centre of your lower lip. What a fucking perfect timing, he thought to himself, as he felt the hunger within him deepening.

Suddenly you can see an inhumane glint in his eyes as he tilted his head. It then struck you that it was the same glint that you saw from the maniac who had attacked you just a week prior — the glint of which, now you belatedly realized and remembered you first saw from Sunghoon that night during Jay’s party though you had made yourself believe at that time that it was merely your eyes playing tricks on you.

“I actually wanted to be gentle with you, to drag it all even slowly. You’ve made this hunt so enjoyable, I thought you deserve that. You know as a gift,” he said in a sing-song manner before hissing in a low voice, “but you’re making it fucking hard.”

You swallowed thickly, realising that no amount of strength you had put was enough to even shift his grasp over you by a bit. I’m done for, you thought in horror. As if that was not horrifying enough, you noticed how Sunghoon’s canines, which were already so pronounced to begin with, seemed to have grown longer. While busy scrutinising his changing features however, Sunghoon had moved to recapture your lips into yet another needy kiss, but now sloppier — reflecting the hunger that had grown so entrenched and urgent within. You feel his tongue brushing over your bottom lip, making you wince, before sending you thrashing harder when you feel him softly nibbling and sucking on your bottom lip. You turned your head away trying to free yourself and catch your breath but to your horror, Sunghoon had begun to trail open-mouthed kisses down your cheek then down your neck. You feel his tongue brushing against a particular spot on your neck, sending shivers down your spine. His teeth then grazed your bare neck — the sharpness of which was alarming for a normal human teeth, “I’ll try to make it quick but let me tell you, it will only hurt more if you struggle,” he murmured and not even a second after, you feel a sudden prick of pain over the area.

“What the fuck, Park s-“ you cussed, brows furrowed in a mixture of alarm and confusion, did he just bite me, you thought. You can feel something warm gliding down your neck. You didn't know what it was but suddenly you feel slightly light-headed. You wanted to yell and scream but your voice were all choked up, energy suddenly draining that you could not even push Sunghoon off even when he had let your arms go, his hands now grasping you by the back of your head and back while his head was buried even deeper into the crook of your neck, his body pushing you up against the door. Whatever was gliding down your neck had now begun dripping onto your right hand, as it was laying limp beside you. You summoned every last bit of strength to lift your hand to see what it was. To your horror, it was blood. But it was too late. Way too late. You had no strength left and your consciousness was hanging by a thread. Your visions were getting dimmer by the second and your senses were growing num.

Suddenly it all seemed to click: the inhumane glint in his eyes; the otherworldly charm and ability to read mind; the Cheer Captain’s accident; Jungwon being hospitalised from sudden anaemia; him saving you from the maniac; his shrouded background — it all formed one big shocking picture that tied so well into the context of the rising cases of missing persons and bloodless murders beyond your town: vampires. Though it still sounded silly in your head, what is for certain is that Sunghoon happened to be one of them. But none of all that mattered because it was too late. You would probably die soon, you thought, and that meant the truth will die with you.

Within the last moments of your consciousness, you realised that you had indeed been nothing but like a rat in a maze — stuck only to traverse paths he had designed for you. You weakly scoff at yourself. You should have trusted your gut feelings. The bad vibes you sensed — it wasn’t just paranoia nor prejudice, it was your inert self sensing danger. Just like how certain animals have overdeveloped their senses to better protect themselves from predators, your gut instincts was trying to do exactly that. But this time, you decided not to listen — the price of which you’re paying with your life.

A/N: YASSSS I’ve finally finished it phew. I hope you like this as much as I did. It took so long to make — sorry for that but I hope the wait is worth it. Please let me know how I’ve done with this one — so much effort has gone into this, I’m drained of any creative juices now. I’m sure you’ve seen millions of writers posting just how valuable comments are. Whether they're praising us or giving constructive feedbacks, they do so much for us. Basically just, feedbacks <3 while likes and reblogs are much appreciated too, it is the feedbacks that keeps us going — telling us that all the sleepless nights, hunched on the table were worth it. So with that, I shall bid you adieu. Hope you enjoyed it :3

▶︎ [update: Part 2 is up - click me !]

Masterlist

falling alone ✩ l.hs [teaser]

✩ series m.list

✩ synopsis: cold cases were heeseung’s specialty, and he cracked every single one. cold hearts were your specialty, and you have yet to make a single chip in your husband’s.

✩ genre: established relationship au | hurt-comfort

✩ pairing: lieutenant!lhs x housewife!reader

✩ word count: 2k | [full fic: tbd]

✩ rating: 18+. minors dni.

✩ warnings: mentions of disappearances. some slightly suggestive themes between husband!hee & wife!reader (nothing explicit), uhhh that's it for now i think!

friday, 9:23pm.

"late night?"

your voice has always been a comfort to him.

the way you cooked dinner every night, the way you washed his hair for him, the way you laid in bed with him – it was all comforting. your soft eyes, eyes that had never seen an inch of a crime scene. your gentle hands, hands that would never cock a gun and aim to kill.

you were home to him, and he hated that he couldn't leave his work at the precinct. he always brought it with him, anywhere he went...anywhere you were.

"not really. caught a session with dr. bahng. i'm sorry about dinner." he loosens his tie, trying to ignore the way your eyes follow his fingers. he takes his wedding ring off for work – insisting it snags on the gloves when gathering evidence, that he never wanted to sully it with such grime. "how was your night?"

your sigh may be inward, but his eyes catch everything. every frustrated twitch of your brows, the way your nose crinkles at the half-assed apology. your eyes linger on the linoleum floor, and he fights the urge to pull you into his arms. he fights the urge to show any weakness to your feelings, because he can't let go of work. he has to be strong, he has to be coarse, he has to be cold.

"it was...fine." you wave him off, moving to take the full plates off the table. only then does heeseung notice that you're still in your jeans, your white top neatly tucked into them. your feet are clad in fresh socks, almost as if you were about to go out when he arrived. his eyes scan you as you move around, pulling his tie completely off and bunching it into his pocket. "are you going out with your friends?"

you don't reply as you scrape the cold food into the trash can, and he focuses on the sound of your bracelet lightly clinking with the handle of the fork. your shoulders sag, soft curls of your hair sweeping over your face as you move to place the dishes in the sink. he sighs, before his legs move him behind you. "why are you upset, honey?" "i'm not, i'm not upset." you scoff, turning the tap to hot when you feel heeseung's hands ghost over your waist. you knew better than to attempt to hide anything from him, especially with the way his brain was literally trained to analyze your every movement. his lips press softly to your cheek as his fingers untuck your top, "i know you better than that."

you're silent as his fingertips trace the soft skin of your stomach, his chin resting on your shoulder. he's going to wait until you decide you want to talk, despite knowing it will be the same argument you have every single week.

the same argument that always ends up unresolved as you kiss in your bed, sheets tangled between your bodies. it's enough to hold off on actually talking about it, it's enough to semi-satisfy the lack of attention you got from him during the week. it wasn't enough to feed his unvoiced, almost insatiable hunger for you, and how he wished he could just douse you in his love and affection until the sun rose. it wasn't nearly enough, because he'd still have to pry himself from the comfort of your warm embrace to step foot in the precinct and inhale the stench of evil in the world.

he felt awful, really. that he could never truly show you how much he loved you, how emotionally constipated his job made him...how his sessions with dr. bahng were no longer of much help. "leave work at work, lieutenant. you have the love of your life waiting for you at home." he had it memorized at this point.

"it's always the same thing, don't worry about it." you turn the tap off, feeling the guilt about wasting water seeping into your stomach. you weren't going to wash the dishes, you knew you weren't. you just wanted to lay down in bed with your husband, basking in the few minutes of attention he'd be able to give you before falling asleep. "baby."

you wince at the pet name, one so foreign on his lips. one you so rarely heard, long lost in your college memories. you grimace as you turn in his hold, his hands now resting on your hips. "don't baby me, heeseung."

"don't heeseung me, y/n. i know something is bothering you, and whether it's tonight, tomorrow, or next week – i'm not letting you go to bed like this." he looks at you through tousled locks, his eyes speaking for him. just talk to me.

you shake your head in subtle disbelief, attempting to push past him when he pins you against the counter gently. "let me go, heeseung."

"not until you tell me what's going on." his voice is harsh, one he also rarely uses with you. heeseung was always gentle, soft-spoken. "i've been at work all day, dealing with shit i can barely stomach. i just want to come home and spend time with you. what's wrong?" he's starting to whine, and it does nothing but make your heart ache and your eyes sting with tears.

"i just want to spend time with you, without having to beg for it." you breathe out, squeezing your eyes shut to avoid his gaze. "you remember everything, hee. i know you had to remember that tonight is date night." sighing, you peel your eyes open to a guilty husband watching you with his own tired ones.

"i'm sorry, honey. it really did slip my mind. let me...let me take a shower and we can go have a night on the town, okay?" he starts to walk away, fingers pulling at the buttons of his shirt when you clear your throat. "it's fine, heeseung. let's just go to bed." "no, let me fix this. we haven't had dinner, and we haven't spent time together in weeks." he slips his dress shirt off as he leaves your line of vision, and you just slump against the counter. he was right, and you hated that you knew he was. heeseung was always this way, though, shouldn't you be used to it by now?

yes, he was gentle and soft-spoken, with a touch of dirty humor and thoughtfulness that always made your heart race a little faster. your relationship was built on a lot of comfort and deep talks, ones that usually involved you unraveling yourself entirely just to get a taste of his own secrets. the two of you had met in college, about three days after the disappearance of his childhood best friend, cha soyoung.

heeseung was even more cold and stoic then, and wasn't interested in so much as even befriending you. he didn't really speak, which according to hs friends, was unnatural. they wound up being close friends of yours as well, thanks to park sunghoon. the seven of them also ended up working at the same precinct.

"heeseung talks...a lot. not as much as jay, but he's just going through a hard time right now." sunghoon had said as he sipped his drink, carefully chewing the tapioca pearls as the two of you walked. "it's not everyday your best friend of twenty years goes missing, you know?" you had shrugged, not really understanding what it was like. your parents had moved you around a lot as a kid, and it was hard to make friends until they finally settled when you got into your last year of high school. you had met sunghoon there, but only met the rest of your friends through him that following summer – except heeseung. he'd gone home with soyoung for the summer, returning to seoul for the fall semester at decelis university with her and your other friends. you still never spoke, until now.

you and sunghoon were swinging by his dorm to help pass out flyers.

"hey, hoon. y/n." heeseung spoke quietly as he opened the door, his eyes nearly swollen shut from crying for the past three days. your jaw dropped as you looked at his face, not at all recognizing the boy in front of you. sure, you'd only ever seen picures of heeseung but you knew enough to know that this...wasn't him. neither you nor sunghoon spoke as heeseung moved for the two of you to follow him, shutting the door behind you.

"how are you feeling?" sunghoon asked as he trashed his drink, your own now sweating on a coaster on heeseung's coffee table as the man gathered things around his dorm. you stood awkwardly as you swung your backpack onto the couch, opening it for heeseung to slide the flyers in when you saw him shake his head. "i don't feel much, actually."

sunghoon glanced at you, but your legs moved before you could think. you rounded the table to heeseung, who looked at your extended arms and empathetic eyes with cold ones. he'd set down the papers in his hands, fingers splayed across them momentarily before turning back ot you, awkwardly entering your embrace. your fingers easily found the nape of his neck, and his rigid form quickly softened as he breathed shakily into your shoulder.

"m'sorry." he mumbled as you felt a few tears soak through your shirt, and you just shook your head.

sunghoon also wound up wrapping his arms around the two of you. something about the way that heeseung's fingers clawed at your sides, and the way that he sobbed into your shoulder made you wonder how long he'd needed someone. someone to ease the knot in his stomach, someone to help him see that this was something that would be solved and everything would be okay again. someone to help him hop along until soyoung was found, and someone to leave when she inevitably took her place again.

that was six years ago.

you and heeseung began dating a year after that happened, a couple of months after the anniversary of soyoung's disappearance. the police stopped looking, ruling her case as a runaway. you and heeseung never stopped searching – you frequently asked cafe owners if you could pin missing posters on their corkboards, and even went door to door every few evenings asking if anyone had seen soyoung.

heeseung had made it to the side of the law, and often reviewed the case to see if he had missed anything. he never had – you had all hit a dead end. everyone's hope began to dwindle, but heeseung never let that sway him. he even asked the forensics department to make age-progression posters, and they did. you'd pinned those up, too.

he was strong willed, he was diligent, he was determined. you love heeseung, you love the person he is...

...but you hate that he can't leave his work at work. you hate that you get a crumb of his affection every few nights, whether it's his lips pressed against your cheek after dinner or his teeth nipping at your clavicle while hovering above you in bed. you hate that you find yourself longing for him even more than you did in college, despite now having him in the deepest way – as your husband, the person who loves you.

the man who shed a singular tear as he watched you walk down the aisle, the man who supported you when your career wasn't what you expected. the man who endlessly told you he loved you in ways that weren't so evident to the naked eye – like leaving the warm water for you and showering in the ice cold, leaving the last slice of cake for you. rubbing your feet while watching law and order with you on days he didn't work (read: on days you pried him out of the home office.)

heeseung loves you, you know that. you just can't shake the feeling that it won't be for much longer.

taglist [those in red could not be tagged!]: @thesassy-mia @starfallia @ramenoil @hoonieversies @wintabite @shnnzsworld @eneiyri @jjongsha @ilovejungwonandhaechan @oopshee @capri-cuntz @thenastone @marimariiiiiiii

975 notes View Post

silcry

1 year ago

right where you left me — p. jongseong

pairing / non-idol!jay x fem!reader

genre / angst, a bit of fluff at the very start, lovers to strangers, forced marriage au :(

warnings / like, one cuss word..., usage of y/n, i think that's it^^

synopsis / jay always said he'd marry you one day, until suddenly he breaks it off claiming he 'found someone else'. months later, on the day of his wedding, you find a letter slipped under the door of your apartment from none other than the groom to be himself.

author's note / dedicated to my jay obsessed best friend!

“I’m going to marry you one day,” your boyfriend, Jay, said softly with a smile on his face as he shifted in his position lying down together with you on his bed to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.

You and Jay have been together for almost two years, and it’s been nothing short of pure bliss. Sure, like any other couple, you two would have the occasional arguments — but rest assured Jay would come knocking on your door with a bouquet and stuffed toy in hand while he asks for your forgiveness.

You let out a light laugh before pressing your lips into a tight smile. “As if your parents would allow that,” you told him as-a-matter-of-factly.

Jay was rich, to put it short. His parents were CEOs of different companies that their parents before them passed down for multiple generations. You, on the other hand, lived a normal and comfortable life. But apparently, it didn’t seem to be enough.

After you met his parents, Jay assured you that they just put up a cold front. Both of you knew he was lying through his teeth.

Jay shook his head. “I don’t care about them. I only want you,” he said before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

A tear rolled down your face as you recalled this memory. It’s only been a year since that sweet exchange of words that you thought secured your relationship for good. You hate how you were wrong.

You let out a dry laugh. “I— I don’t get what you’re talking about. Was it something I did? Come on, Jay. We can talk this out,” you sounded desperate as you shook your head, tears threatening to fall down.

Jay shook his head silently. You thought you almost saw tears pooling around his eyes as well. But to even think that seemed delusional. He seemed so deadset.

“I told you, we just can’t be together anymore,” he still wouldn’t look up to meet your eyes.

“I know, you told me that. But why?”

“It’s not you, it’s me,”

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Jay,”

“We just can’t,”

“A reason. You owe me that much—”

“I found someone else,” he said with a tone so final, though the crack in his voice almost made him sound hesitant.

A silence filled the air.

You knew nothing lasted forever. A part of you knew that what you and Jay had going might have shattered one day.

But he always sounded so sure that you two were something permanent. Something written in the stars. So you pushed that part of pessimism in you to the back of your mind.

Now here he was, taking everything he said, the promises he made, the sweet nothings you shared, and twisting it all around. The part of you, the ugly voice that didn’t believe in the timelessness of the love you and Jay shared mocked you as it boomed with laughter and insults.

“Oh,” you breathed out.

A man in a black suit approached your table in the privately booked restaurant and tapped Jay’s shoulder.

“Sir, it’s time to go. You’re going to be late for your meeting with your parents,” the man hesitated as his stoic face held a hint of sympathy when he glanced at you.

“I’ll be right there,” Jay replied as he picked up the coat from behind his chair.

For the first time in this meeting you two had, he managed to look you in the eye before turning his gaze back downwards.

As he turned around and walked away, you mucked up the courage to ask him a question.

“Do you love her?” You asked, suddenly standing up.

Jay turned around and met your hurt gaze. His stone-cold expression melted slightly at this. He paused for a while taking in your presence with a look that almost seemed pained.

He nodded once his eyes traveled back to meet yours once more. “Yeah,” he breathed. “More than I can say,” he paused before turning back around and leaving.

It’s been five months since you and Jay broke up, and you’ve managed to stop breaking into tears at every reminder of him after the first three.

There was no contact between you two. And it was easier to keep him out of your thoughts that way. But that didn’t mean you stopped thinking about him. It was hard to do so.

You were scrolling through social media on your phone as you rode the elevator going up to your apartment. You exited the lift and got your keys ready with one hand while you kept your phone in the other.

You stopped in your tracks after seeing a headline on twitter.

‘Heir of Park Enterprises, Park Jongseong and daughter of the CEO of Hwang & Yoon Law Firm, Yoon Jiwon: Everyone’s Favorite Newlyweds!’

You took in a sharp breath. You’ve managed to steer clear of any news and media about the couple for a while until today. You pressed the power on your phone to turn it off before making your way to open your apartment door.

As you shut the door behind you, you noticed a cream colored envelope facing downwards with your name and address written on it.

You placed your work bag down before picking up what seemed to be a letter, sitting down on your couch and opening it.

As you unfolded the crisp paper, your eyes landed on the first few words. And you immediately knew who wrote it. The handwriting was one that you could recognize as easily as your own.

Y/n,

I’m writing this the night before my wedding. And you’re all that my thoughts consume. The day we fell in love, a part of me knew that you were the girl of my dreams. The girl I wanted to see once I walked up the stairs to an altar. And tomorrow, that girl isn’t you. I’ve thought about how we broke up, how I left you, every day since it happened five months and fourteen days ago. I never wanted to leave you. But when my parents first gave me the instruction to do so for them to be able to set me up with someone else, I showed apparent impertinence by not following their words, and they were angry with me. They told me that you were a bad influence. That the reason I kept disobeying them was you. So they told me that if I refused their instructions once more, they would’ve done something terrible to you and your family. I couldn’t risk it. I couldn’t hurt you like that, yet I still ended up causing you pain. I thought that if I said I found someone else and treated it like a normal falling out of love instead of saying the contents of the previous paragraphs, the hurt would last shorter. I proved myself wrong with that. It pained me either way. I hope you move on from me. You deserve better. You deserve someone who would protect you and your loved ones instead of giving up. I’m sorry I couldn’t be just that, and I should’ve. I question myself everyday why I wasn’t. As for me, I know I will never find someone as good as you. Everyone else will always fall short. A part of me has loved you since I first met you, and since then I’ve only fallen in deeper. You’ve consumed my heart and my soul. I love you, Y/n L/n. And I don’t think I’ll ever stop. By the time you read this, the ring meant to be yours settles on the hand of another. But it will never be truly hers. One day, I hope you can find it in you to forgive me for the hurt I’ve caused. Maybe in some other universe, I never would’ve had to leave.

Yours, Jay

You finished the letter with a hand clasped to your mouth in a failed attempt at stopping yourself from crying.

You thought the wound was just starting to scab only for it to turn raw once more.

Jay was right. Maybe in another universe.

author's note / lowkey got emotional writing this ermmm.....

134 notes View Post

silcry

1 year ago

Fetish

Rating: 🔞

Summary: Sunghoon likes being in an on again, off again relationship. It's like a game to him. It makes him feel powerful. Especially with a woman so in love with him, that she is willing to come running into his bed whenever he beckons her.

Warnings: SUNGHOON IS A TOTAL DISASTER OF A MANIPULATIVE DOUCHE AT FIRST, SMUT, PETNAMES IE; PRINCESS, BABY, DARLING, ANAL PLAY, SPITTING, ACCIDENTAL PREGNANCY

Notes: this is loosely based on fetish by Selena Gomez. I don't feel like proofreading yall. Please, it's not that serious. Btw this is quite possibly the most toxic thing you'll ever read lol but I just gotta get it outta my brain

Power.

It was addicting. Enchanting. She gave herself over to him without so much as a second thought. Released every coherent thought from her mind to give him her full submission. She trusted him, too much perhaps, with her body. Her love, her heart. No matter how many times he pushed her away, she always came crawling back to him, desperately in love. Ready to do any and everything to please him.

"Take it or leave it. Baby, take it or leave it. But I know you won't leave it. 'Cause I know that you need it..."

He sickened himself with the way he'd mock her.

"Back already, Doll? Can't get enough, can you? It's been how long? Two days? That's a new record. Are you that obsessed with my dick?"

Sunghoon hated himself sometimes. Because despite his actions, he really did love her. But this cat and mouse game, this torture he put her through, had become almost a form of foreplay to him. He reveled in the way she cried and begged him to come back to her. The way she fell completely apart in his absence. The longing for him in her eyes when he returned. She'd sit obediently at his feet. Naked, wet, and begging for his attention. His affection. Anything. His trapped little mouse.

His love was consuming. Unique. An experience that she knew no one else could give her. It felt like ecstasy shooting through her veins and like a noose tightening around her neck. Like warm rays of sunshine and cold, dark, thunderous clouds. She knew she could never live without it. But she also knew that love shouldn't feel like this. She tried to have more respect for herself. She needed it, actually. Especially given the news she had just discovered this morning... She tried to leave. But she could never seem to stay away. She found herself pondering over this very fact as she lay in his bed, listening to the harsh droplets of rain beating against the window.

"Come here, baby. You were gone a whole week this time. I missed you." He nuzzled his face into the crook of her bare neck, giddy with the elation of having fucked her into oblivion for his own selfish satisfaction. She was almost able to convince herself that this was a normal and healthy relationship.

"Don't wait so long next time."

Next time.

Next. Fucking. Time.

She knew what that meant. It meant he'd get bored within the next week or two and tell her it was over once again. It meant that he'd leave her there, her heart bleeding out from his emotional torment while he disappeared completely unscathed. Only to return with a pretty smile and a hard dick, enough to make her forget all of the pain he put her through.

Something snapped inside of her.

She promptly sat up, untangling herself from within his long limbs. She swung her legs over the edge of the bed, bristling when she felt the length of his finger trailing down the curve of her spine.

"Oh? Have I struck a nerve, darling?" That damned condescending tone. She could hear the grin in his voice.

"There won't be a next time, Sunghoon. This is it. I'm done. I get to leave this time," She tried to keep her tone even and stern. She knew that if he heard even an inkling of wavering, he'd overpower her, turn this whole thing around and have her begging for him like the pathetic slut he made her.

She was taking his power away. Protecting her sanity and mental well-being had never been as important as it was now. He was equal parts amused and alarmed internally. Since when did she get to change the rules of the game?

"Then go."

He knew she wouldn't. Couldn't. Calling her bluff seemed like a smart idea at first. After all, they both knew how desperate she was for him. He didn't think he could lose, but as she stood up and began gathering her clothes, his hands began to shake. Could it be that he had finally pushed her just a bit too far?

"It's late, darling." She frustratedly tugged her sweatpants on, hopping on one foot as she jammed her socks on as well. "And raining. You're terrible at driving in the rain." Why was it so hard for him to ask her to stay?

"Like you care," She scoffed to herself.

She decided to forgo the bra, yanking his her hoodie over her head and storming out the room without as much as a goodbye. She was doing everything in her power to convince herself that this was it. That she didn't need him anymore. He tugged on his briefs and followed behind at a lazy pace, resting his forearms over the railing as he watched her from the top of the staircase.

He watched as she yanked his door open, heart pounding, as he anticipated her next move. She stood, seemingly frozen for what felt like an eternity. A depraved smile spread across his face as she slowly shut the door, unable to even cross the threshold. Her head thudded softly against the door as her frame shook from quiet sobs.

"I'm not surprised. I sympathize. I can't deny, your appetite. You got a fetish for my love. I push you out and you come right back..."

Just as he suspected, she was too weak, too in love, too powerless to leave. He hated how much he loved this. He took his time descending the stairs.

"I thought you said you were leaving? Change your mind?"

"Why?" She hiccuped. "Why can't you just love me the way I love you?" And why was she so weak for him? This was not the time to fall for his charms again. Life was forcing her to make a choice. But maybe she could have just one more night....

"I do love you, Darling-"

"You don't! All you do is leave me. And push me away. All the time. I have no idea where you go the majority of the time. Or who you're with. You could be out fucking who knows how many other women. And I'm just the only one dumb enough to keep crawling back to you. I'm such a fucking idiot." The feeling of his lips pressing gentle kisses into her neck made the hot tears roll down her cheeks more profusely.

"I don't appreciate you suggesting that I'm out fucking other women. Because I'm not. And you know I'm not. And again, if you're so unhappy with what I do, then leave."

"You know I can't, Sunghoon," She whimpered feeling absolutely pathetic.

"And why not? I want to hear you say it."

"Because. No matter how bad this hurts, I love you too fucking much to leave you."

"That's right, baby. Cause you love me too fuckin' much."

"Reaching your limit. Say you're reaching your limit. Going over your limit, but I know you can't quit it..."

Her breath caught in her throat as she felt his long fingers hook into the waistband of her sweatpants. He eased them down her legs, along with her panties. He gripped a handful of her fat ass, before spanking her harshly.

"Get your pretty ass back up those stairs." She sniffled and wiped her tears before turning to walk back up the stairs.

"No, sweetheart. I want you to crawl for me."

That shit eating grin on his face made her want to kill him and marry him at the same time. Nevertheless, she maintained eye contact with him as she sunk to her knees and began crawling. It was degrading and humiliating and it was making her tight little cunt uncomfortably wet. She could feel his gaze on her as she crawled up the steps, his eyes drinking in her clenching anal passage and the small, gushy hole of her pussy.

"What a good girl. Crawling for me. With your pretty little holes on display, just waiting for me to use them. You look so fucking pretty, Doll." His cock twitched when he saw the way she was clenching and tightening in excitement. It felt like it took ages for them to reenter his bedroom.

"Up. Up on the bed." She scrambled to comply, lying flat on her back and spreading her legs wide for him to settle in between. But he didn't. Instead he sauntered away into his closet, only to return with three small boxes.

"What do you say.....we try something new tonight, my darling love, huh?"

"What's that?"

"Toys," The wolfish grin on his face meant trouble.

"What kind of toys?"

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Safe word?"

"Red."

"Good," Before she could ask any further questions he was opening up the first box and pulling out a pair of handcuffs.

He had restrained her plenty of times, so she barely raised a brow at the sight of the cuffs. He tossed the box to the side, hovering over her and raising her arms above her head. He tugged her hoodie off, leaving her naked beneath him, a familiar and welcome position for him. He intertwined their fingers, leaning down to rub his nose against hers in an Eskimo kiss. He leaned back half an inch, staring deep into her eyes. For a split second she thought she could see the same love she had for him reflecting back at her in his gaze. The clinking of the cuffs closing around her wrists brought her back to reality. He placed a single chaste kiss to her lips before continuing to kiss down, stopping at her neck.

"You know, sweetheart, I really do love you." He was pressing open mouth kisses along the length of her neck, stopping when he got to that one spot that made her shiver.

"I don't want you to ever feel like I don't. Because I do. I just happen to also really enjoy our little game." His lips closed around her sensitive spot, nipping and biting to form a bruise.

He pulled back with a wet pop, continuing his trail of kisses to her chest. He took in a nipple, softly suckling, just the way she liked it as he looked up at her. Brows furrowed and lips set in a perpetual pout, she was so fucking cute it made Sunghoon sick that he had ever hurt her.

"You're so fucking cute. Spread your legs, baby. Wanna play with you." He mumbled around her tit.

She complied, the sticky wet lips of her cunt flowering open as she spread her legs wide. His fingers danced down her abdomen, causing an eruption of involuntary giggles to bubble out of her, and Sunghoon found that her giggles sounded way sweeter to his ears than her sobs. The cold tips of his fingers ghosted over the place she needed him to touch most, her aching, slick covered clit.

"Look at me, my love. I want you to watch me while I pleasure you." Her eyes were still teary when they met his.

He watched as they went hazy and unfocused, her entire body shuddering as he dragged his fingers teasingly up and down the length of her gash. Sunghoon could feel her excitement dripping down his fingers, gathering and spilling out of his palm as he pushed his middle and ring fingers into her pussy. She instinctively clenched around his digits, a whimper escaping her as she felt his fingers crook, massaging her g-spot.

"I have to tell you, honey... I don't take too kindly to you threatening to leave me," She gulped in a mixture of nerves, excitement, and anticipation.

"Let's be honest here," He continued, "You and I both know that I'm it for you."

"I mean... do you really think you'll ever be able to find another man who can touch you like this?"

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, his fingers were abusing her g-spot like never before.

"Something about me got you hooked on my body. Take you over and under and twisted up like origami..."

She wanted to reply. To give him an attitude - no, to give him hell, but the way he was curving his fingers within her core made her brain go foggy. A funny feeling was quickly beginning to bubble up in her stomach. Like butterflies and warm kisses and also a bit like needing to pee. She opened her mouth to warm him, but all that came out was a helpless squeak. The feeling was mounting within her, overwhelming and intense. She wanted to reach out for him, to hold him as she shuddered through what she was sure was about to be a very wet orgasm only to be reminded of the cuffs around her wrist. It was all happening too quickly for her to process, her eyes falling shut and a desperate moan escaping her as he touched her with an expertise that only he possessed.

"I said look at me, slut. You're gonna watch me make this pathetic fucking pussy squirt. You're gonna cum for me again, and again, and again. And you're never gonna threaten to fucking leave me ever again. Because nobody can make you feel as good as I do."

Sunghoon's ego inflated ten fold when he felt her cunt lock tight around his fingers. His chest swelled with pride at the sight of her eyes rolling back, pussy squirting a glimmering arch of clear juices as she screamed in euphoria. He brought his other hand up to toy with her spasming clit, chuckling to himself as it made her squirt another small stream. She was shaking like a leaf, desperately closing her thighs in hopes of getting him to stop overstimulating her.

"N-no! No more, baby, please," She gasped.

"Oh, Sweetheart. We're nowhere near stopping."

He pulled his sopping fingers out of her cunt, smearing her juices across her face before forcing his fingers past her lips.

"Suck."

She complied immediately, taking his long pale fingers into the back of her throat and suckling sloppily. The sight of her plump lips wrapped around his fingers made his dick twitch, a moan escaping him as he pushed deeper into her throat.

"You gonna gag for me, pretty girl? You know how much I fucking love it when you gag," She did exactly that, throat contacting around his digits as her mouth filled with saliva.

"Mmm, just like that. Who's my good girl, baby?" His deep baritone demanded an answer.

"Me," She garbled out around his fingers, drool dripping from the side of her mouth. "I'm your good girl."

She felt a fresh wave of juices oozing out of her as he sensually slid his fingers out from her lips.

"Now that you've got my fingers good and wet, I can prep that pretty little asshole for our next toy." Her eyes grew wide at that. Sunghoon grabbed the second white box, opening it to reveal an anal plug with a cute, pink, heart-shaped crystal on the end.

"What color are we feeling, baby?"

"Y-yellow," She had never been nervous enough to say the safe word before. They had also never explored beyond fingers and the occasional tongue anally.

"Yellow? OK, sweetheart. Tell me what you're thinking. What's going on inside that pretty head?" He set the box aside in favor of soothingly massaging her thighs.

"I guess I'm just nervous."

"It's normal to be nervous when experimenting with new things. But I'd never make you do anything you didn't want to do. We can stop right now and just cuddle if you want. Or we can go slow and see if we like it or not. It's up to you. So, do you want to stop, or do you feel brave enough to try?" There was no judgment in his voice. No disappointment or anger. On the contrary, his gentle tone relaxed her enough to want to try.

"Can we take it slow?"

"Of course we can, Doll. My brave girl," He kissed the inside of her thighs sweetly, his lips lingering against her warm skin. His kisses trailed inwards, eventually landing him at her soft, wet mound.

Now that he knew she was feeling a bit uneasy, he watched her like a hawk for the first sign of discomfort. He placed open mouth kisses against her smooth skin, lips moistening with her sticky juices. He reached a hand up to grip around her waist as his tongue slid down to toy with the hood of her clit. Her hips bucked into his face, still highly sensitive from orgasming twice just moments ago. The scent of her pussy seeped into his nose, making him throb within the confines of his boxers. Her taste quickly spread across each and every one of his taste buds, intoxicating him like an aphrodisiac. He sucked her swollen pink bud into his mouth, groaning as he rolled his tongue over her most sensitive spot repeatedly.

"Fuck, that feels so goood," She moaned out, hips rolling into his mouth.

Whilst she was gyrating and distracted, Sunghoon took the opportunity to push his first digit inside of her winking rim. He pulled back from her clit, spitting a messy wad of saliva onto her bud before slurping it back into his mouth. She was squirming now, head thrown back as she dug her heels into the bed.

"Fuck, please, Sunghoon. Please, baby. I-I need..."

"What do you need, love?"

"Dick." She groaned.

"What an ungrateful little whore," He couldn't hide the grin in his voice. "Here I am. On my fucking knees for you. Eating this fat, juicy little cunt just the way you like... and all you can think about is dick." He didn't miss the way her asshole fluttered around his finger as he degraded her.

"You'll get my dick when I feel you've fucking earned it."

With that said, his second finger pressed inside of her rim to join the first, and he went back to lazily lapping at her quivering bud. At this point, she was so gone that she was attempting to push her asshole further down the length of his fingers, whimpering in need.

"I feel so fucking empty, Sunghoon. Please. Need you to fill me up, baby," She whined breathily, only to be ignored.

The gentle nibbling of his teeth made her withe against his sheets, her thighs closing around his head. With her plush thighs simultaneously plugging and warming his ears, he listened to her muffled sounds, his dick feeling like a steel rod in his briefs as she called out for him over and over in a preorgasmic daze.

"I love you. Love you so fucking much," He murmured into her cunt, removing his fingers and replacing them with the tip of the plug.

Her juices were flowing copiously from her pussy, providing more than enough lube for him to begin easing the toy past her rim. She keened in pleasure, wiggling impatiently until Sunghoon gripped her sternly and held her down still. He returned to sloppily suckling at her clit as the widest part of the plug stretched her tight ass open. He pushed it all the way in, his own hips beginning to buck impatiently into the mattress at the sight of the pink crystal shining enticingly as the plug fully sank into her virgin hole.

"Shit, baby. So fucking sexy." Sunghoon was mesmerized at the sight, blindly reaching for his phone as clear beads of her arousal began to ooze and drip all over her pretty new plug.

"I'm gonna take a picture, baby. Cause this is too fucking pretty to not capture." Tears of desperation and horniness were welling up in her eyes as he spread her cunt open with his fingers to take pictures. The rattling of her cuffs as she absent-mindedly tried to free her hands broke Sunghoon out of his stupor.

"P-please?" This is what Sunghoon lived for. The desperation for him, her willingness to submit herself to him for his pleasure and his pleasure only.

"Have I earned it yet?" Oh, did she.

"I dunno, baby. You think you deserve my cock?" She had more than earned it with her trust and bravery.

"Y-yes?" She thought she might orgasm completely untouched as she watched him push his briefs down his legs and kick them to the side. He crawled back between her legs, her entire body shaking in anticipation of what was to come. He dragged her closer, the bottom of her thighs resting over the top of his as he reached for his third box.

"I think you deserve it too, my love. You've been such a good girl for me, hmm? Such a good girl, thaaaat... I'm gonna give you exactly what you've been begging for."

He leaned over her on his fists, capturing her lips in a toe-curlingly passionate kiss as he teasingly ground his length into her pulsating snatch. She stopped breathing entirely as the wide, pinkish red tip of his dick kissed her entrance. As he pushed in, she heard a small click before a buzzing noise filled her ears. With one thrust, he was bottoming out inside of her and a brand new sensation, of vibration, was surrounding her throbbing clit.

She didn't last two seconds longer.

Her back arched painfully hard, her thighs instinctively closing, which made the sensations of vibration, of Sunghoon stretching out and fucking into her hole, of the anal plug so much more intense. A tortured scream echoed off the walls, followed by pleasure filled sobbing as she writhed and bucked and rolled her hips in tandem with the waves of pleasure. She was dying, he was absolutely killing her with his perfect dick, her cunt squeezing and creaming and gripping his length as she nutted all over him.

"Fuck, yes! Nasty little cunt is fucking milking me so good. Keep creaming on my dick, baby. That shit feels so fucking good. I love you, pretty."

"L...ove.....y.....y-ou," She slurred, dick drunk out of her mind.

"I know you fuckin' do, baby. Love me so fuckin' much, huh? You want to turn around for me, Mama? Let me hit it from the back?"

"Fuck yes!" He never stopped thrusting as he unlocked the cuffs around her wrists, only pulling out long enough to flip her onto her knees and readjust her vibrator before he was pistoning away inside of her again.

The harder he fucked into her, the deeper her back arched, until she was laying on the side of her face, watching him fuck her in the mirror across the room. The sight of her fat little ass boucing and jiggling with each thrust, his throbbing shaft soaked and coated in her gooey cream was straight out of his nastiest fantasies. The pink crystal of her plug was calling out enticingly to him. He gave it an experimental tug, moaning loudly as it made her clench viciously around his dick.

"You like that, don't you, you fucking slut? Like having something up your tight little ass, don't you?" He pulled her plug out, spitting a wad of saliva onto her ass before pushing it back in and fucking her with it.

"Fuuuuuck, Sunghoon! You're gonna make me cum again!" She moaned.

"Go ahead, baby. Cum for me again. Get that pussy nice and fucking wet for me."

He could feel her walls starting to spasm around him again. He watched in awe as the arch in her back deepened impossibly further before she was rolling her hips back to meet his every thrust. With every thrust, he could feel her dripping down his balls, soaking his inner thighs. When he heard her start to whine with the onslaught of an impending orgasm, he turned her vibrator up a setting, moaning as it made her body go rigid. Sunghoon was captivated with the way her entire body froze, unable to do anything except surrender itself to him. He placed a firm hold around her waist, fucking into her with deep, slow strokes as she started to orgasm around him. It nearly knocked the wind out of him when he felt the first wet clench of her walls suckling and swallowing his dick. She was milking him, eyes rolled back in her head, fingers strangling his linens. He couldn't help but observe the way her pussy was convulsing and tightening around his cock, creating a frosty white ring around the base of his cock.

"Thank you," She whimpered brokenly.

"Shit, baby. Pussy looks so pretty cumming on my dick."

"Yeah?"

"Mhmmm. And who does this pretty little pussy belong to, Princess?"

"Pussy is all fucking your's." She was shuddering now, shaking in the aftermath of orgasm.

"Yeah? This pretty little pussy is all fucking mine? Say it again, baby," Sunghoon moaned, head rolling back onto his shoulders.

"My pretty little pussy is all your's."

He groaned in response, pulling out and repositioning her onto her back. He turned the vibrator off, chucking it to the side and bringing her ankles up to rest over his shoulders. He pushed back inside of her heat, overwhelmed by the snug fit. He rested the weight of his body on top of her, wanting to feel as close to her as possible. His deep, slow strokes resumed, stoking the fire burning in the pit of his stomach. No woman had ever showed him euphoria the way she did. And as he rode her sopping cunt, staring deeply into her eyes, he knew he was just as obsessed and in love as she was. A moan slipped out of his mouth, a shiver racking his body as he felt the mushroom head of his cock twitch and leak against her cervix.

"Open your mouth." She complied immediately, his dick stiffening even more if possible as he spat a wad of spit onto her waiting tongue. She swallowed it down, amused at his antics.

"You're so fucking nasty," He smirked.

"You love it."

"I do. I love everything about you..." He trailed off, her eyes getting that dreamy look in them as his thrust became more intense.

"Love the way you feel cumming on my dick. Love your pathetic little moans and cries. Love the way you love me."

"You got a fetish for my love..."

She tangled her manicured fingers through his dark locks, pressing a chaste kiss on his lips as the room echoed with the sounds of their fucking. This was truly Sunghoon's favorite position, not to fuck, but to make love in. She felt so warm and tight and good in this position, and he had been holding out for so long. He could reach the deepest depths of her cunt, his balls aching at the feeling of his tip drooling precum all over her cervix. He could touch her all over, his hands occupying themselves with both a handful of ass and a handful of her bouncing tit. He could lean down and kiss her (or spit in her mouth). But most importantly, he could see her. Stretched out across his bed. So submissive, so good. Just for him, only for him. Letting him take her over and over again. In whatever position he wanted, as many times as he wanted, whenever he wanted.

Because she was his woman.

The thought alone was enough to send him into orbit.

"I'm gonna cum," He grunted. "W-...where?"

"Cum inside me, baby." He laced his fingers through hers, as her other unoccupied hand continued to tug and stroke through his hair.

"Shit. I love you so fucking much."

She couldn't ever recall Sunghoon repeating the phrase this often before. But there was sincerity in his voice. And an urgency, a desperation in his love making that made her feel for once that maybe he did love her the same way she loved him.

She was enthralled as his eyes grew glassy and unfocused, his breathing deepening as pitiful cries escaped his pink lips. And suddenly, his hips began to rut into her shakily, losing any and all sense of rhythm as he impatiently approached his climax. She felt his hard cock pulsating within her before his head dropped forward onto her chest and he whined out in a long, weak moan. Warmth flooded within her as he erupted, his aching, swollen dickhead painting her cervix white with his cum as he shook powerlessly in her arms. She yanked his head back so she could watch his face contort in brain numbing pleasure, his fucked out expression stroking her ego. She ground her hips up into his pelvis, delighted to see his eyes rolling back in his head, mouth falling open in a silent scream of ecstasy in response as he suffered through the peak of his climax. She fucked him through it, gently rocking against him to help him come down from his high.

She stroked a hand up and down his sweaty, shivering back as he panted, limp and exhausted. Laying on her chest made him feel relaxed and lethargic in the aftermath of the single greatest orgasm his body had ever been made to endure. He laid there until he could feel his legs again, shuddering as he pulled out of her. He placed a tender kiss on her lips before walking to the bathroom to get a warm rag to clean her up. When he returned with the rag, he was surprised to see her already up and tugging on her hoodie once again.

"Why are you getting dressed? You didn't even let me clean you up, Pretty."

"Sunghoon. I um... I'm not going to do the whole aftercare thing tonight. I meant what I said earlier. This is it for us. So I'm just gonna leave."

"What are you talking about? Leave for what? Just spend the night with me, babe."

"No, Sunghoon. I can't. This relationship was doomed from the start. And starting right now, I have to move on."

"Is this about what I said earlier? About you not staying away so long next time? Because if that's what's got you so upset, then I'm really sorry. It was a dumb thing to say. But it's hardly worth losing our relationship over." He could feel his pulse staring to race as she calmly stood up and began dressing.

"It's about more than just that, Sunghoon. I'm... it's just time for me to grow up and move on."

"But I love you. You can't just leave me."

"It doesn't feel good, does it?" She couldn't help but snap.

"So this is just you trying to get back at me?"

"No, Sunghoon! Just drop it, and let me leave." She gathered the remainder of her things and headed towards the door only to be stopped by a hand around her wrist.

"No! You say it's time to grow up, so we're going to talk this out. Like adults."

"Sunghoon, just let me-"

"No, you're not fucking leave me."

"Sunghoon-"

"Just stop it, you're not going anywhere!"

"I have to-"

"NO!"

"I'm pregnant! Ok?!"

The only sound in the room was the raindrops hitting the window. The now cold rag slipped from Sunghoon's fingers, hitting the hardwood floor with a wet splat.

"P-pregnant?"

"Yes."

"... For real?"

"Mhmm."

"Like... with a baby?"

"Yes, dumbass." Sunghoon ran a shaky hand through his sex tangled bed head.

"When did you find out?"

"I had a doctor's appointment this morning."

"I missed our baby's first appointment?!"

"No, it was just a regular check-up, and I had some blood work done. That's how they found out that I'm carrying."

"Do you know how far along you are?" His heart was beating so loud he wondered if she could hear it.

"Six weeks."

"...We're having a baby?" He whispered almost as if he was too afraid to say it out loud.

"No, I'm having a baby."

"Fuck's that supposed to mean?"

"It means I'm pregnant, I'm going to have this baby, and I'm going to raise it. Alone."

"And where the fuck did you get the idea that I'd ever let that happen?"

"Sunghoon, I love you. But you're not dependable. Kids need stability. And I refuse to let my baby see you come in and out of our lives like a revolving door for your entertainment."

"Our baby."

"What are you not understanding?"

"Our. Baby. Whether you like it or not, that baby is just as much mine as it is yours. So you don't get to just cut me out of the picture. I know I haven't been the most... stable. But I'm begging you to give me a chance. Let me prove to you that I can be a father to our baby."

"Sunghoon.... I don't know."

"Please," He pulled her closer to him before slowly letting his hand creep down to caress her stomach.

"Give me a chance. It's not like we aren't in love with each other, or we're strangers or something. It wasn't intentional, but we made this baby together out of love. And he or she deserves to grow up with both parents. Under one roof. As a family."

His eyes were watery with emotion. And again, Sunghoon hated himself for making her feel like she needed to protect herself, to protect his own baby from him. He felt like he was finally being forced to deal with the consequences of his actions.

"I don't want you to be with me out of obligation. Just because I'm pregnant. I want you to be with me because you love me."

"Do you think I'd be begging for a second chance if I didn't love you? Do you think I'd be pleading with you not to leave? You know I love you. And you're carrying my child. That only makes me love you more. Knowing that there's a little piece of me, of us, growing inside of you... I understand why your first instinct was to leave. I know you want to protect our baby. But I promise you, if you give me just one more chance, I'll show you how dependable I can be. I'll stick by your side forever. I promise. I'm gonna mess up. I'll probably say some dumb stuff every now and then. We'll piss each other off and argue occasionally. But I'll never leave you. Neither one of you. Ever again." She had never seen such determination in his eyes. Everything in her was screaming at her to leave. To create distance. To run away before he could.

"Let's just try, baby. Please?" The tears that were shimmering in his eyes began to spill over onto his pale cheeks.

In a flash, she imagined how her life would play out if she said no. It was a safer route to take. Looking at him, though, in this moment, in his bedroom while he fought for his family with tears in his eyes, she knew she couldn't leave.

"Promise? Promise you won't leave us?" As soon as the words came out of her mouth, she could see the weight of the world lift off of his shoulders.

"I promise!"

"....OK, Hoon. Let's just try."

He enveloped her in his arms tightly, molding his lips to hers like he'd never get the chance to do it again. And as he dragged her back to bed, a protective hand resting on her stomach, on their baby, she knew she made the right choice.

Don't kill me yall🫢🫣. I'll go back and edit later. Also the end is kinda blah but its whatevs. Anyways, feedback is appreciated. Toodles 🫡

my love (mine all mine) ☆ jake sim

☆ non-idol! jake x fem! reader ☆ summary: after years of abuse, jake is afraid of love, so why do you have to be so warm? ☆ genre: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, implied adult! au, very domestic ☆ warning(s)? domestic violence and abuse, poor parenting, 1 mention of self harm, implied mention of suicide, kinda indulgent sorry ☆ word count: 1.5k

The earliest memory that Jake had was the sound of porcelain plates crashing against the tiled kitchen floor, and the wails of his mother.

For a period of time, it was all that he could remember: going home to a cold house, hand-in-hand with his older brother, his heart pounding in his chest as his young mind wondered if Dad was going to hurt Mom again, or if they'd go back to loving each other tonight.

He couldn't have been any older than nine when he experienced the wrath of his father first-hand, when he came to school in May wearing a long-sleeve shirt and long pants as if the early-summer weather wasn't rising, the scent of citrus filling the air. Sure, the bruises, and later scars (because of course, his father just had to try to stab him with a broken beer bottle), hurt, but nothing would compare to the silence that rang through the house after a screaming match. It would pierce his ears every single time, so loud that it was deafening, yet so silent that Jake could hear every single breath that his mother took as she pulled at her hair, driving blades into her skin, ignoring the quiet rumble of her child's stomach.

He'd gone to bed hungry many times. Too many times.

But, perhaps the worst memory that Jake had was the morning after his seventeenth birthday. Jake spent his birthday outside the house, not wanting to be suffocated by the taste of salty tears and domestic violence in the air. He came back late, much later than he should have.

Thank god, neither of his parents were home, and his brother was already off to college by then. When they weren't screaming at each other, physically assaulting their son, or neglecting him, his parents were either off to work, or hanging out with their sketchy friends, drinking all of their responsibilities (like their children) away like nothing else mattered.

Or so he thought.

Because the next thing he knew, his mother was shrieking at him, hitting him with the same hands that should have been cradling his face. And when his bastard of a father heard the commotion, it was almost like he was excited, excited to have an excuse to put his son in a chokehold. It seemed like the only time that his parents wanted to agree with each other was when they could hurt him.

As his lungs closed in on him, his choked breaths gasping for air while Jake tried to pry his father's hands off his neck, he felt light-headed, a fuzzy feeling filling his head until his body lost all its strength.

Jake swore that he would have died that night, if it weren't for the barks of the family dog.

If his perception of family, love, and marriage wasn't already warped, that early morning of his seventeenth birthday did.

He vowed to himself then and there, that he would never get married, nor would he ever start a family.

Yet, as you held him in your arms, enveloping him with warmth as hot tears streamed down his face, Jake could feel all his resolve slipping away.

Indeed, his vow held up. It held up all throughout college and for years into his adulthood. He became known as the "single friend," the friend that was always the designated driver because he'd rather die than consume a drop of alcohol.

But then you pranced your way into his life.

You, with your beautiful face. You, with the brightest smile that he'd ever seen. You, with the softest, most gentle touch.

When you wrapped your arms around his torso, pressing tender kisses against the nape of his neck as you giggled a soft,"I love you," Jake's heart pummeled to his stomach.

It was suffocating.

His hands were clammy, so moist with sweat that he had to wipe his palms on his jeans. His chest would pound, loud enough for it to be the only sound filling his ears. His stomach twisted, a hot coil curling in his abdomen. It was nauseating.

But the worst was what he felt in his throat.

Something wicked— Something overwhelming and painful— clambered up his throat. It wrapped itself around his neck, pulling tight like the noose his mother threatened to put around her own neck. When it crawled up to his mouth, Jake nearly threw it up. He tried to swallow it down, but he gagged.

And it was already too late.

He'd already muttered the words, "I love you, too" back.

Love was terrifying. If he loved, what would happen? Would he get married, and enter a life of pure misery?

And what if he had kids?

When Jake was angry and he looked in the mirror, he hated the way that all he saw was his father's eyes staring back at him. His mother always told him that he looked like his father anyway.

Jake knew he wouldn't. He would never lay a finger on another person, let alone his own kin. But as days and years passed, his voice only sounded more and more like his own father's. He couldn't help the way his expressions scarily resembled his mother's, the same ones that he'd seen contort into fear, wrath, and indifference.

But here he was.

In the dark, his face was buried in your shoulder, the same ones that he'd kissed. You patted his back as he let out sobs, wet and salty tears wetting your skin.

It was another night, where you and him would hang out and flirt in your apartment, maybe do a little kissing.

Maybe he shouldn't have laid down with you. Maybe he shouldn't have let you put your fingers in his hair, stroking it gently as he laid on your chest. Maybe he shouldn't have listened to your every word as you traced his face, muttering to him everything about him that you loved about him. He shouldn't have, he really shouldn't have. Especially when you ended it all with a kiss to his eyelids, whispering into his ear, "I can't wait to marry you one day."

Jake always did his best to contain his emotions. After all, he'd learn to do it so well because of his home life. No one had to know about his struggles.

Yet he couldn't help the wave of emotions that crashed down on his shoulders. One moment, he was smiling in your kiss, the next his face was wet.

It didn't help when you were so warm to him. You cradled his face, kissing his tears away, hands holding him like he was a piece of glass.

"I'm scared," was all he could say.

Because that was all he felt in that moment.

Fear.

Fear, because he couldn't figure out why he was crying.

Fear, because now all his emotions were spilling out.

Fear, because you said you wanted to marry him.

Fear, because he, too, wanted to marry you.

You didn't let him go that night.

You stayed there with him, letting him cry into your shoulder until the sun rose. You didn't know why exactly, but the way he gripped your waist like you'd leave him was enough to tell you.

"I know, I know," you'd whispered into his ear. "I know, Baby."

All he did in response was pull you closer, and chant your name like it was a prayer, like you were his god and he was your worshiper.

Jake's favorite memory was the sound of wailing.

Not the wailing of his mother, not the wailing of his older brother, but the wailing of the child in your arms.

He could only watch with misty eyes as the small newborn clung to your chest, loud crying filling the hospital room.

"Jakey," you said weakly, flashing him a smile. "Look what we made."

We.

That's right.

This child was his and yours. As he held the baby, being careful not to do anything stupid, Jake stared into its crying eyes (as if his eyes weren't crying, too).

When Jake looked at his child, he saw his eyes. He saw the same eyes that his own father gave him. He wasn't filled with fear, or anger, or guilt— he felt love.

This child didn't have his father's angry eyes, the eyes that Jake spent his entire life believing he inherited.

No, this child had Jake's eyes, Jake's eyes that were filled with love.

You giggled softly as you watched your husband's intent and utterly fascinated gaze at your child. He snapped his head up at you.

"I love you," he blurted. He didn't say it a lot. It felt like poison on his tongue when he did, something unnatural and not meant for him. But in that moment, it felt like his entire being was made to say it. "God, I love you so much."

Yes, Jake would run.

He'd run, and run, and run, from love.

He'd run as far as he could, until his legs gave out.

He'd run for eternity, because he knew that one day, he'd walk to you.

2K notes View Post

silcry

10 months ago

Behave.

A/N: idk even waht to say shes finally here lOL

Word Count: 3.5k

Synopsis: Dilf!Sunghoon x Reader (there’s a sixteen year age gap saurrrrrr; reader is like 21ish)

Warnings: i legit don’t remember so, uh, Sunghoon is a very mocking dom but it’s him so we expect that, lots of teasing and degrading in a soft pillow princess way, sex ofc, i mean it’s me yall know how I am by now

Please leave feedback! When people say nothing I can’t tell if people like it or not and likes don’t tell me anything ;-; <3

_________________________________________

Sunghoon eyebrows rose when he opened the door, yet to be lit cigarette dangling from his mouth when he saw a girl who looked to be about ten to fifteen years younger than him.

She immediately got flustered and her face turned beet red, fiddling with her phone.

“Sorry I think I got the wrong address,” she rushed out, Sunghoon cocking his head to the left.

“Given your age I think you’re looking for my neighbor,” he replied, nodding before shutting the door. He heard another knock from next door followed by your voice, Sunghoon sitting down on the sofa and lighting his cigarette.

He took a drag before letting out a long breath, eyes rolling when he heard your voices through the thin walls….

“Have you seen your neighbor?” your friend exclaimed as you opened the takeout containers, eyebrows raising at her statement.

“Well he does live next door to me yes.”

“And you didn’t tell me he was that hot???!?!?!? Are you even my friend?!?!?” She exclaimed, waving her hands around for extra dramatic measure.

“He’s sixteen years older than us. He’s practically ancient and collecting dust.”

“He isn’t that much older! And you know what they say….older men do it better….”

“If he can still even get it up,” you retorted back, sitting on the sofa and gesturing for her to the same. “Now hurry up will ya, I’ve waited long enough to watch this with you”

Sunghoon gritted his teeth and went out to the balcony instead, not wanting to hear anymore conversation.

If he can still get it up…

“Probably has only fucked guys that couldn’t make it past one round,” Sunghoon scoffed as he looked out onto the city, hoping that with each drag he’d let go of such a simple statement….

Keep reading

958 notes View Post

silcry

1 year ago

── to all the boys i've loved before

you write a letter when you get a feeling so intense that you can’t hold it in anymore. these letters are your most inner, personal thoughts that were kept safe in a little blue box that you stored in the top of the shelf. so how is it that heeseung convinced you to fake date him, jaeyun wrote your letter back, sunoo came out to you, and jungwon stop talking to you?

the blue box is missing and so are the four letters that you stamped and wrote their addresses on.

casting: reader as lara jean, heeseung as peter kavinsky, jake as john ambrose, sunghoon as reader's older brother, jungwon as josh sanderson, jay as greg, sunoo as lucas, ni-ki as kitty | ft... yunjin as chris, chaewon as gen

directors' note: hello everyone! we are proud to announce that @j4keluver and i are doing a collab!! we will be making a series based on netflix's "to all the boys i've loved before" series. disclaimer: this is not an accurate representation of the series, we try to incorporate many details from them. this is our version of the series :) so we hope that you enjoy reading this as much enjoyed writing it <3

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀 𝗶'𝘃𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝗲𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲 | wc: tbd

when you were a little girl, your mom would tell you the classic old tale bed time story of “princess and prince happy ever after.” she would talk about how lovely it is once you find “your prince,” the one who truly loves you for who you are. ever since then, you were hooked on romance novels - and finding the picture perfect boyfriend.

your older brother sunghoon, would roll his eyes at you, stating that “all men are disgusting shits and the only boy you can talk to is me.” you would just wave him off and stick your tongue out that him, saying how he’s just mad that he hasn’t gotten a girlfriend and he mumbles a “whatever.”

the only issue with trying to find a boyfriend was that you DID NOT know how to express your intense feelings. so that’s when you started to write letter. these letters were the most intimate things you’ve probably ever written in your life besides smut on tumblr. there were four of them in total.

lee heeseung, your 7th grade crush and first kiss

sim jaeyun, your partner in model UN

kim sunoo, from homecoming

and

yang jungwon, your next door neighbor

play...

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀: 𝗽.𝘀. 𝗶 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 | wc: tbd

after the whole fake dating fiasco, you and heeseung seem to be doing perfect until it wasn’t. a new problem snakes its way into you and heeseung’s relationship; jaeyun wrote back. yeah, remember the letter you wrote years ago but was sent out by your little brother who thought was doing you a massive favor? yes, that one. you had no idea THE jaeyun would write back. you really did not need this right now especially since you and heeseung are in a good place.

there was two ways you could deal with this; respond to the letter or ignore it and pretend that it doesn’t exist. the two options lead to one option for your relationship; don’t tell heeseung. it’s not that you didn’t want to but everything was so good right now. why ruin it with a letter that probably only talks about jaeyun’s acceptance into NASA as a quantum physicist… right?

play...

₊˚⊹♡ 𝘁𝗼 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝘀: 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 | wc: tbd

your recent trip to korea made you realize two major things; you have go to start learning more korean besides duolingo and you can’t be away from heeseung too long. the countdown till graduation has started and with college decisions coming around the corner, life was falling into the perfect book ending.you knew heeseung’s dream school was stanford; it’s always been stanford. with his good GPA, athletic abilities, and extracurricular, it’s not shock that he gets accepted. you get ready to open your letter. this was it. you guys were going to be high school sweethearts that turn into college sweethearts that turn into husband and wife.

that whole image comes crashing down when you see that you’ve been rejected and the only thing on your mind is how are you going to tell heeseung? heeseung keeps pestering you about your status until you do what you do best when nervous : lie. he’s bouncing off the walls when you tell him, it’s all he can talk about. he starts to plan how much to deposit for your shared apartment on your senior class trip to new york city !

whoopsie, how are you gonna tell him that you DIDN’T get accepted into stanford and that nyu, a college almost 3,000 miles away, is becoming your dream school?

play...

this is a work of fiction. it does not depict any of the artists in any way, shape. or form. ©luvj4key and j4keluver, all work is written by us. do not copy or repost

211 notes View Post

silcry

10 months ago

I fw Angst sm

wanna be yours 2.0 // ln4 social media au // part one

pairing: lando norris X american!reader / mclaren photographer!reader and slight pato o'ward X reader

warnings: swearing

summary: a remix of my fic wanna be yours in social media au form. or basically lando and the reader both being in love with each other but being too stubborn and scared to say anything so they suffer in silence until one finally crumbles.

contains: best friends to slight strangers to lovers, pining, angst, jealous!lando, asshole!lando, clueless!lando, and perhaps a little lando or pato? situation.

masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

may 5th, 2024

Wanna Be Yours 2.0 // Ln4 Social Media Au // Part One

liked by landonorris, y/bsf, oscarpiastri and 100,000 others

y/n.jpg: miami baby! i think the guy in the second pic won some kind of race involving super fast cars but i could be wrong.

landonorris: who is that guy???? he's really good looking...

↳ y/n.jpg: i think his name is lando onewin.

↳ landonorris: bye. that doesn't even work.

user1: you always take such good pics of lando.. thank u queen

user2: lando always being the first to comment. dude's down bad lol

y/bsf: the kids miss you. please come home.

may 6th, 2024

may 8th, 2024

may 9th, 2024

liked by landonorris, mclaren, patricooward and 200,000 others

y/n.jpg: back at the mtc today for a very special reason! everyone was there to celebrate my amazing photography skills and editing on all the pictures from the season so far! lando was even kind enough to show up with a trophy to give to me! i love my job <3

in all seriousness. could not be more proud of you lando!!! it's been a long time coming, but we both know it's only the beginning!

landonorris: that awkward moment when you tried to take the trophy from me....

↳ y/n.jpg: DON'T SAY THAT PEOPLE ARE GONNA THINK IT'S TRUE.

↳ landonorris: i'll make sure they engrave the next one with your name too.

↳ y/n.jpg: ok but as long as my name is listed first.

mclaren: our favorite photographer ❤️ -liked by author

user1: ok but where is y/n's trophy fr??? she's hands down one of the best photographers in the game rn.

user2: y/n and lando you are so dear to me

user3: pato in the likes??

↳ user4: y/n used to work for arrow mclaren before working for mclaren f1. also pato is literally the reserve driver for f1 this season... honestly the web that is y/n, lando, and pato intertwines so much it's kinda crazy...

may 11th, 2024

may 14th, 2024

y/n.jpg added to their story

landonorris replied to your story

↳ WHY WOULD YOU POST THAT??? IT'S MORE THAN A JUMPSCARE!

oscarpiastri replied to your story

↳ why do you always catching me folding in front of lando like that :/

may 15th, 2024

may 19th, 2024

liked by y/bsf, oscarpiastri, patricooward and 100,000 others

y/n.jpg: imola 2024.

y/bsf: best photographer in the world. i love you!!! -liked by author

user1: not even a pic of lando's car.... oh no :/

user2: no funny caption... no lando like or comment... guys we are in the trenches

user3: we love you y/n! -liked by author

may 21st, 2024

y/n.jpg added to their story

landonorris replied to your story

↳ what the hell?

2K notes View Post

silcry

1 year ago

I will kms this is too cute, it's 5:13 am rn omd 😭

୨ৎ — With Love, Sunghoon

pairing: non-idol!sunghoon x fem-reader

synopsis: Almost is sometimes never enough, Sunghoon needed a tutor and Y/N needed the extra credit. What happens when two failed lovers meet again after years of running away and misunderstandings?

w/c: 23.3K :o

tags: teacher x teacher, first love, baby baby (?) angst, sunghoon kinda a dick, then he turns into a loser LOL, lots of gussy gussy fluff at the end, niki and jungwon cameo as hoon’s gremlins. And yes hoon blonde obsession.

a/n: oh em gee, its been MONTHS. been so busy with irl stuff and other responsibilities I've neglected dazed-hee </3. BUT pls expect more content to come out soon because I am stressed and writing helps me destress HAHAHA. ending is not how I would like but I honestly did not want to scrap this fic and start a new ): this is little fic was supposed to be a present for my hoon girlie @hoonvrs AND IT STILL IS! i hope everyone enjoys and pls lml what you think! ALSO With Love Series going on mini break bc I have so so many ideas I want to write about I can't be limited to this series ASDAKJSD

likes & reblogs are encouraged thank you!!

“So class I’m happy to say you don’t have any homework this weekend.” You sighed, placing all the files you went through from the past hour on the side as the class cheered lightly, some even clapping at the thought of a free weekend mixed with fun and more studying..

“But—” you interjected, biting back a small smile as some of them instantly stopped cheering; some even holding in groans while you pointed at the calendar on the wall.

“Don’t be surprised if you walk into class Monday with a quiz on your desk about cell biology and functions.” You hastily announced, a slight grin on your face finally hearing the groans and complaints travel through the room, quickly turning around you began cleaning the whiteboard while bidding goodbye to your students.

“Hey be happy it wasn’t a real pop quiz— and I told you what unit it’s going to be about!” You reasoned out loud in the hall, smiling at some of the girls in your class who argued it was guys in the back doing most of the complaining. Compared to the other teachers you felt like you were quite lenient with the students, making class and learning as interactive and fun as possible. Being one of the youngest teachers you made it your job to sympathize with the students since you were in their position not that long ago.

“Ah wait–” You called out, grabbing onto two sneaky individuals hiding behind the girls on the way out.

“I need you two to stay back for an hour of tutoring starting next week. If you don’t you won’t have a passing grade for eligibility.” You warned.

“Ms.Kim please our coach moved practice to after school hours and he’s been really strict about being there.” the boy plead, his eyes glistening brightly looking down at you.

“Well Jungwon maybe we shouldn’t have failed the last unit exam and for you Niki— start doing corrections you’ll earn half your points back.” You nodded toward the other who was sulking softly. You knew the pressures and tight schedules student-athletes went through and you honestly felt bad, the two weren’t even doing terribly you just wanted to make sure they had leisure with their grades when it came to eligibility check.

“What about I have a talk with your Coach and have him push back practice by an hour or something, I’m only doing this for the two of you; trust me I know what it feels like.” You sighed patting their shoulders as they nodded to your offer. Heading to the faculty room you were greeted by other teachers finishing up for the day, you weren’t sure who this new coach was but practice usually took place early mornings. Partly so it doesn’t run into afterschool activities and studying sessions but also because the weather was more favorable most of the time.

“Ms.Kim, how are you today?” Your boss greeted you by the printer, greeting her back with a smile you saw the way some of the female coworkers were actively glancing out the window, chatting amongst each other with shy grins painting their lips.

“I’m doing good Mrs.Go, just printing out a few practice sheets for tutoring starting soon.”

The older lady nodded at you with a warm smile, when you first got the job a little over two years ago Ms.Go stepped up as the new principal from her vice position. You’ve always felt welcomed because of her and she always had nothing but good and encouraging things to say to and about you.

“I’m glad you’ve found your pacing with the students, I get nothing but compliments from them and their parents— keep up the good work.” she rubbed your shoulder softly bidding you goodbye. Shaking out a small sigh you stood tapping the table as the beeping of the machine printed what felt like endless amounts of pages.

“Oh my god he’s so good-looking.”

“Did you see when he was running with the students earlier?”

“I heard he’s the new literature teacher who’s also coaching the basketball team.”

Gathering your things you acknowledged your coworker's excited expressions; curiosity overtaking as you made your way to the window to see what all the fuss was about, all you could see were the student-athletes running back inside towards the gym. A flash of blonde catches your eye before forcing yourself to peel away knowing there were lots to do and students to expect soon.

Seeing a few students greet you on the way back to class had your shoulders high in pride at the familiar faces of kids you’ve tutored before. Many of them respected you as a teacher but also saw you as a friend— well most.

“Ms.Kim!” turning at the group of boys your brow raised as a few of them offered to help carry the stack of papers you were gripping back to class, their shoulders bumping against each other to gain your attention which only prompted a short scoff under your breath. Being one of the younger teachers you also noticed the uncanny amount of attention you received from students, girls asking for advice about dating and what to look forward to in college while the boys were being— well boys.

“Coach is looking for you guys, something about wanting to run another lap.” cutting between them you were glad Jungwon showed up when he did, brows furrowed slightly at some of them murmuring lowly to each other. After everyone left the boy greeted you with a dimple, one you saw frequently in class from what you recalled.

“I talked to Coach and I don’t think he’s willing to push back practice.” You heard him sigh, placing the stack of paper he insisted to carry on your desk as you pushed your fingers into the back of your dress pants.

“Well I would love to talk to your Coach, he knows if you and Niki don’t qualify for eligibility you won’t be able to play till the next check, right?” Your voice confused with shock seeing the boy nod with a conflicted expression on his face.

“Where’s Niki?” You asked softly sitting at your desk checking the time on your wristwatch knowing students were going to show up anytime soon.

“He’s distracting Coach Park while I’m here.”

“Well tell Coach Park, when he’s done with practice to come to my class.” You ordered him, filing some notes in the file cabinet before standing up heading to the lab stations. With a nod Jungwon left swiftly, his sneakers squeaking against the tile floor as you leaned against the table, appreciating the evening sun seeping through the tall windows lining the class walls with your eyes closed.

A knock on your door pulled you from your thoughts realizing some of your students came for their quick tutoring session. “Alright, should we get started?” You greeted them, a feeling of sentiment washed over you.

It was bittersweet in a way.

“Ms.Kim we’re almost done with the worksheet!”

“Okay once you’re done just leave it on my desk and you three are free to leave.” You nodded, going back to the rows of beakers and test tubes you were prepping for the planned lab on Monday. You’ve always loved science, being a biochemist double major in college, you’re practically a pro at handling bunsen burners and microscopes. You weren’t sure when you decided to be a teacher and to be completely fair, you’ve never thought to be one when asked about your future endeavors as a kid.

But maybe it was from the multiple classmates you’ve tutored as a side job and extra credit, you found you had a talent for working with others and teaching them what you’ve mastered best. The satisfaction of seeing others click with the information and concepts you present always made you proud, proud that they could grasp complex ideas, and proud that you were an influence and part of the reason why. Nostalgia overtook your thoughts recalling back about your college days, from friends to strangers and those in between.

Brushing your fingers against the clear tubes absentmindedly, a bitter smile took your lips— almosts were never enough sometimes. It was nearing five in the evening and you were finishing the final touches to each station carefully, making sure all the lab equipment was properly placed for the students, by now the ones who came have left and you were here alone in your thoughts.

“I heard you wanted to speak with me about something?” You heard someone call from the door, slightly muffled as you were quickly packing up the mess you made from preparations into the table cabinets below.

“Yeah actually, it’s about your afternoon practices—” You replied slightly vexed, none of the other coaches have changed their practice hours so you weren’t sure why the basketball team in particular did.

“I won’t be able to change or push back practice since that’s the only time that works for us.” huffing out a sigh you quickly set the extra box of test tubes back into their protective cases in the lower cabinets.

“Okay well, you know if your athletes don’t qualify for eligibility they won’t be able to play correct?” confused as to why you weren’t getting a response you stood up with a huff. Your eyes widened while your words jumbled to get out, realizing who the new coach was and who you were talking to.

It’s been a while, years to be exact since you last had eyes on him. He was blonde now, and it fit him well; just as tall as you remember taking in the way he was leaning against the door frame with his hands shoved in track pants. His slightly raised shoulders and wide eyes told you he was just as surprised to see you, a stoic expression overtaking his shocked one when he straightened his posture.

He was exactly the same as he was before, but so different.

“Sunghoon?” his name became foreign to you over time, like a bitter fruit you bit into and wished to forget. A wave of emotions swirled across your face you were sure of it. His eyes flickered around the classroom and a small sigh could be heard through the thick tension that had formed between you two.

“Looks like you’re doing well,” he mumbled jingling the keys in his pockets as he watched your frown deepen further.

“I’m not changing practice times Y/N, don’t ask me again.” his voice was firm and cold, you saw the way his eyes flickered over you once more before turning to leave.

After your brief conversation with Sunghoon, he left you standing there questioning if what just happened— really happened. With both of your hands gripping the table behind you, the sound of him making his way through the hall confirmed that it was indeed Sunghoon.

Park Sunghoon whom you fell in love with in college, Park Sunghoon who also broke your heart as well. It was him. He was the new coach that is already causing trouble the same way he did back then in your mundane life.

“Alright and the enzymes only react during the active site, get it?” Tapping your pen against the desk you sighed out of relief seeing your classmate nod enthusiastically finally understanding the unit concepts from the past lectures. It was warm, with the University library lined with large windows you wouldn’t be able to get a good nap here without the bright sun bearing down on your back, that’s why people nap in the reserved study rooms instead.

“So if the enzymes are heated or enter a different pH environment what happens then?” You asked carefully— there was no hope for the kid but for extra credit, your professor offered you to tutor students. You could only hope a higher being blessed you with the ability to input knowledge into these empty vessels because fuck; how were people this bad at studying?

“They become unnaturalized?” She answered unconfidently, eyes lighting up seeing how your head tilted giving her a slight sound of approval. It was wrong but at least it was close.

“Close, denatured,” closing the workbook you nodded slightly acknowledging this was a lot better than when you first began tutoring her. “Keep studying like this and you’ll be caught up before the final in no time.” You smiled softly as she quickly packed her things.

Oh, the things you did for extra credit, from extra lab hours to volunteer research assignments you needed every single point you could gain to balance out the fact you had no extracurricular and social hours to back up your pretty GPA.

“Thank you Y/N it feels so good to finally understand what’s going on in class.” she gratefully thanked you, gripping the extra workbooks you recommended to her enthusiastically. With a smile, you bid her goodbye before peering back down at your laptop to see what you had next— a meeting with your professor.

“I must say the classmates you are tutoring have been improving quite a bit, slowly but surely.” Your professor said looking at his notes with a satisfied nod. It was true, it started with your friend Naeun who was failing before despite passing with flying colors now. You now tutored kids who weren’t even from your own lecture, some in different years even.

“If there are any other students you need me to tutor I’ll be more than happy to take them during my free time.” You added quickly, rubbing your palms against your jeans to mask the shake in your leg from his peripheral.

Before he could answer, a knock on the door caused you to turn as a rather tall boy came in with a guitar case in one hand and a packet of papers in the other. With his hair messily put together he looked like every other boy in your class, but the moment his eyes met yours you quickly shifted back into your seat; trying your best to avoid the heat running through your face.

“Professor Lee I’m here to talk about my exam..” he announced demeaningly. You could only watch as the older male stood up, pulling the boy to sit beside you in the empty seat while you shifted looking at the grade on his recent exam.

Yikes.

“Sunghoon this is Y/N she’s in your lecture and also one of my tutors.” you reluctantly nodded toward him in acknowledgment as he did the same. “She’s one of my best students and I’m asking her to tutor you in hopes it’ll bring your grade up so you can pass the class.” With wide eyes, you glanced at Sunghoon, a hand rubbing the nape of his neck assuming he was weighing out the options he didn’t really have.

“And you know you need to pass the class to graduate Sunghoon, I advise you to do your best with Y/N or you’ll run into big trouble once finals come.” He sighed, gathering his things while glancing at the clock on the wall. While bidding the two of you goodbye, you faintly heard him whisper to the boy a small ‘be nice to her’ before the door closed shut. Picking up your bag you pulled your phone out looking at your rather busy calendar for an open spot in your schedule.

“I’m free every Tuesday Wednesday and Friday in the late afternoon, just pick two days and let me know before next week. Or you could tell Professor Lee and he’ll relay the info to me.” you could only give him a shy smile despite him sitting there blinking at you. With an awkward nod, you gave him one last forced grin before making your way toward the door.

“Wait!” His sudden exclamation startled you slightly, a quizzical stare greeting him while your fingers were already grazing the cold door handle.

“Where are you going right now?” He briefly asked, adjusting the grip on his guitar case while stuffing his exam back into his backpack.

“The library.”

“I’ll come with.”

Your solo studying session today suddenly turned into a plus one, watching as your new friend pull his things from his bag, you failed to hold the slight snicker earning his curiosity. Shrugging at his raised brow, you opened your laptop pulling out a practice workbook with a smile.

“Could’ve fooled me with that study setup if you never told me you were failing Biology.” You nodded at his set of pencils and eraser neatly placed in front of him, his frown turning into a grin knowing you were right, unfortunately.

“Listen I’m good at everything but science, it might be hard to imagine but I’m a TA for my English professor.” he boasted proudly, sitting up in his seat as you smiled humming in acknowledgment.

“Oh and to answer your question from earlier, I’m able to do Tuesdays and Wednesdays, I just finished an important project so I should be available a lot more often now.” He politely added, taking in your gaze as you nodded slowly before turning back to your workbook.

After an hour of studying you noticed Sunghoon was actually quite diligent, not getting distracted by his phone nor did he daze into space even you’d catch yourself doing at times. If this was your conclusion then you weren’t sure where his problem was that had him failing— terribly.

“That’s wrong.” You softly stopped him, pointing at the question he’s been working on for the past couple of minutes after seeing the frustrated expression overtake his face promptly.

“I’m not good with genetics, I get the whole structure and basic….stuff, but once it gets to this I get lost.” He admitted running his fingers through his hair. Peeling your gaze away from the mole beside his jaw you coughed before opening up your notes.

“From what I see you're making it way more difficult than it should be—” You started, pulling your chair beside his before sliding your tablet across the table with a holistic breakdown of the concepts you took notes on for the genetics unit. After a few minutes of explaining and correcting his question, you allowed him to scroll through your notes a little longer, grinning at the fascinated look in his eye as he complimented the way your notes looked.

“I can send you the notes later if you like them that much.” You chuckled, scooting your chair back after feeling his elbow graze your own, a little too close you figured. Hearing no response your eyes naturally found his again realizing he was looking between you and the space now in between. Once he realized you were waiting for a response, he pushed your tablet toward you quickly, his pen tapping against the table softly with a nod.

“Please if you don’t mind, I don’t know how you have time to do them like that they’re really nice.” He complimented, checking his phone before handing it to you with the contacts app opened. “Well I don’t do much of anything else so I have a lot of time to spare.” You snickered.

“Oh come on, nothing? Like nothing seriously?” He asked you again, holding back a wide grin noting your name displayed on the screen along with your number. “Why do I look like I do a lot of stuff?” You questioned, his nod surprising you somewhat.

“Yeah I mean, our classmates always say how fun and nice you are to be around so I just assumed,” he explained truthfully, from what he’s heard, a lot of your classmates had nothing but good things to say to you.

“I only go out with a few of my close friends from time to time but seeing that you pretty much—” glancing at his duffle bag you assumed was for whatever club he was a part of and his guitar case beside it; you could tell he was a busy man. “ —you literally do everything, it could look like not much for you.” You smiled genuinely.

“Well trust me when I say I rather have a few things to focus on over this,” he emphasized, nodding toward all his things, earning a wholehearted laugh from you quickly disagreeing.

“Yeah? I really wish I could put myself out there like that, I’m tutoring to make up for the fact I don’t do anything else but study.” You shook your head, playing with the pen between your fingers with your gaze set on the sunlighy shining on the table.

“Well I wish I didn’t do all of–”

“Don’t lie.” You cut him off, turning towards him quickly causing the both of you to laugh softly, your lips turned into a grin as you forcefully peeled your gaze away from his dimple that caught your eye. Sunghoon could only admire you from the side, smugly grinning at how you’d get so shy from meeting his gaze while your fingers busied themselves playing with the pages from your notebook.

He understood why all the guys on the team wanted you as their tutor, what was better than a pretty girl spending her evening with you in the library or cafe? Your cute flustered expression when he smiled at you or when he caught you smiling back, it all made sense to him. Sunghoon made a mental note to inform the others you weren’t looking for any more tutees, and he only hoped they will believe him.

When he was called into the professor's office he really thought it was the end for him, with graduation around the corner and a science class holding him back from sweet victory; nervousness was an understatement. Shitting his pants would’ve been a better way to describe the feeling pooling in his gut when he saw a big red 43 plastered on the recent unit exam. But when he saw your small confused face peering up at him he knew he lucked out this time.

You were known to take kids who look like they don’t have a single thought behind their eyes and tutor them into high B passing students. He was sure anyone else tutoring him would’ve helped with an extra brain processing his mistakes, but he was glad it was you.

Third week of tutoring and you noted Sunghoon worked hard— and worked harder when he knew there was a reward for his accomplishments. A coffee stop before class or a meal before practice, you kept your promise and rewarded him for the commitment you knew he put in. What started as a reward for his improving quiz grades turned into what you felt was a normalized occurrence.

‘Wanna grab a meal from the cafeteria? I’ll drop you off after.’

‘Let’s meet before class for a bit, I want to see you.’

‘Are you free later today? We should go watch that new movie you were talking about.’

He explained it was just the athlete in him addicted to the dopamine he got when he succeeded, specifically doing good in class; but you argued it was just a way for him to trick you to agree into doing things he wanted. Hell he didn’t even know how dopamine worked up until last week’s study session.

“Sunghoon you can literally ask for anything else, I’ll even buy you dinner again just not this.” You sighed, holding up the singular ticket he presented you as his wish for earning a 90 on his exam; the highest he’s received yet.

“Y/N you said I can ask for whatever I wanted.” he pointed out, tapping the back of your seat with his fingers watching you groan at the thought of attending this weekend.

“This is seriously what you want?” watching his court nod your lips pressed in a tight line before sighing in defeat. A promise is a promise, and you were one to keep promises.

“Fine just please study this well for the next exam coming up.” You didn’t earn a response, but the cheeky dimple and upturned brows told you that if studying well meant pulling you to do things like attending his game to support him— Sunghoon promised to turn into Einstien. He’ll be reborn as Issac Newton himself if that’s what it took.

“Oh and—” turning back to him your eyes widened slightly feeling his fingers graze against your back, a simple action you still haven’t grown used to lately. “Sunghoon, no.” you refused shaking your head wholeheartedly, seeing him pull out a jersey from his duffle bag with a smirk on his face as he laughed to himself.

“You didn’t even let me explain.” He reasoned, eyes twinkling watching you continue to disagree, mumbling about how ridiculous this was since you already agreed to even go in the first place.

“Y/N how weird would it be to show up and not show off who you’re supporting?” He hummed, pushing his jersey from last year over to your side. “Hoon I think people are gonna think it’s weird regardless.” You whispered, knowing the type of people he was around would already view it odd you came in the first place. Sunghoon was someone you thought you’d only admire from afar, his likable personality and seemingly good looks made a memorable first impression not only on you but apparently to every living— breathing eligible girl on campus.

The looks and whispers anyone with a working brain would dread were to be expected if you walked into that stadium with his jersey, you were already getting looks from simply walking with him to class.

Sunghoon was just someone you weren’t supposed to mingle with, as crazy as it sounded; opposites weren’t supposed to attract. There were plenty of girls in his social circle you knew were interested in him— it just felt wrong, scary even that you and Sunghoon were this close.

“Hey…don’t think like that,” He reassured you, brushing a few strands of hair away while you stared at him, admiring the pinches of electricity shifting across your cheek when his fingertips grazed against your skin. In the many weeks you and Sunghoon have hung out, you realized he was a lot different from what you assumed.

He was sensitive; you concluded that when he received his first quiz two weeks after your first session. His grade wasn’t— what the two of you were aiming for, and it was evident in his expression how disappointed he was in himself. After your constant reassurance that learning was about process and progress; not instant results, you grew to appreciate his soft grin and high shoulders that were filled with confidence and motivation.

But he was also very attentive, even on days you didn’t feel your best Sunghoon was always understanding without having to say anything. And you were grateful, you tend to hold back and push through with plans even when you didn’t feel in the best shape, especially for your tutees. Sunghoon didn’t jest around much on days he saw you weren’t responding how you usually did, and he still managed to find time to ask if you were okay. Cheering you up in ways that had your cheeks flushing and heart racing.

It was like skinship came naturally for the two of you, what started off as friendly nudges and taps on the arm shifted to his hand casually drawing lines on your back, your fingers tracing the veins on his arm or your shoulders casually touching while sitting beside one another. Things just felt comfortable with him, you realized that the one day the two of you were at his apartment, the library was starting to become a distraction but looking back— you weren’t sure if his place was much better.

While working on genomes and thermodynamics the two of you often shared snacks with one another, however when your eyes caught his pink lips around your bottle of coke you realized then and there that you and Sunghoon were more than tutor and tutee, more than friends. He made that known when you felt the same pink lips press a kiss on your temples after bidding you goodbye, making sure you made it inside your condo before he left, a small pep in his step noted while catching one last glimpse at him.

“Just think about it, hm?” he nodded toward you, bottom lip pulled between his teeth watching you roll your eyes before stuffing the jersey in your bag, ushering him to continue studying much to his resistance.

“So are you gonna wear his jersey?” your friend sang with a smirk ghosting her lips, watching you hastily fix your hair in the mirror that she quickly helped you with not that long ago, fixing the top you picked to avoid that exact question purposely. It was the day of his game and you were already running slightly (really) behind schedule from a last-minute tutoring session you were asked to do despite making sure to state this weekend— you were unavailable.

The game started a couple of minutes ago and it would take almost thirty minutes for you to get to the arena.

“Do I look good?” You asked her nervously, palms clammy against your jeans realizing what you got yourself into.

“You look cute babe, Sunghoon is gonna miss every three-pointer with you in the crowd.” She joked, yelping in response when a dry shampoo bottle was thrown her way. “Naeun I’m serious, people are already gonna look at me weird for being there— the least you can do is make sure nothing is stuck between my teeth.” You whined, checking yourself in the mirror again out of pure paranoia.

“Y/N the only reason why they’ll be looking at you is because the Y/N is there for Park Sunghoon, so go! You’re late already.”

“Your seat is in row 4, enjoy! Go Cougs!” Awkwardly grabbing the ticket you were greeted by rows and rows of students cheering for the ongoing game, it was almost halftime and the team was a little under fifteen points. Excusing yourself through the crowd— you realized where exactly Sunghoon’s extra ticket landed you.

Maneuvering through, you did your best to ignore the glances from some of the girls you recognized, they were people who frequently hung around the team; people whose crowd you weren’t a part of. Gratefully you weren’t seated beside any of them but figured this was the guest section for the team, you saw both students and family seated in the area.

“Oh? Are you here for Sunghoon hyung?” A voice pulled you from your observation, glancing down you noted a younger boy looking up at you; dressed in your school colors with a sticker decorating his rather full cheek— a slushy in one hand and a pretzel in the other. He was cute, his wide eyes waiting for your answer as you smiled at how adorable he looked.

“What made it obvious?” You asked him in a whisper, giggling slightly when his eyes crinkled in a smile pointing back at you.

“Y/N!” Sunghoon’s sudden voice made you snap your gaze to the court, your eyes meeting his almost instantly. Breathing was human nature, a biological process of the body responding to your blood oxygen levels with an automatic retort that you’re born with instantly; yet somehow when you see Sunghoon every now and then, you forget how to breathe sometimes.

The few strands of hair sticking against his temples distract you from his absolutely dazzling smile and shining eyes that grew in size making you smile shyly. Glancing down, you coughed awkwardly, feeling his jersey's smooth fabric against your fingers. Before heading out the door, the white jersey caught your eye and had you changing in the livingroom before leaving.

You were here for Sunghoon and you wanted him to feel like you were too, and by the deep dimple showcasing on his face, you knew you made the right decision.

Raising your brow— you quirked your head towards the scoreboard, you didn’t need to say anything because Sunghoon knew exactly what you meant from your expression alone.

‘You invited me to your game just to lose?’ snickering at the way drops of sweat shook from the tips of his hair, you scoffed watching his shoulders raise proudly when a few of his teammates noted your presence in the crowd. You were never one to be interested in sports, but after another quarter into the game; you were one of the many that were standing in your seat, watching the tick of the clock count down and the score narrow with each pass on the court.

“Sunghoon..” You whispered, fingers clutching in anxiety noting the clock hitting the twenty-second mark, he needed to shoot a three-pointer for the team to finally take the lead and ultimately win the game. With his eyes darting across the court Sunghoon has never felt this much pressure in his whole entire life. The game was whatever, he had plenty more games to play and win, but the past few months have been hell for him.

With graduation around the corner, he didn’t really have any more time to ‘play’ on the court, plans after graduation? No clue. Did he have enough credits to actually graduate? Another problem at a later time. Was the girl he’s been dying to ask out finally warming up to him? Well...

Meeting you has been one of the best if not the best thing that has happened to him in a while, not only were you practically carrying him to the graduation finish line, you seemed to make even the unexpected— exciting, comforting even. Things just got more bearable for him since you’ve been around.

Even now with the whole fate of the game twirling between his fingers, he couldn’t help but smile knowing you were there in the crowd, there for him. The moment he saw you sitting in his jersey he knew these feelings weren’t just mere lingering feelings that come and go, what a plot twist you were.

“Sunghoon!” Your voice always caught his attention, even now in a crowd of roaring support or those who wished for the opposite, it was like he could only hear you. He wasn’t sure what to expect when he first walked into the professor's office that one day, but he wouldn’t wish for it any other way.

“Sunghoon shoot the fucking ball?!” Blinking at your unexpected exclamation his body automatically did what he did best, react in stressful situations— muscle memory from what he recalled you teaching him. With the sound of the ball rolling around the rim, Sunghoon could only let out a sigh of relief when the roar from the student section doubled, quadrupled even after the basketball bounced on the court after scoring the final basket.

They fucking won.

Jumping from excitement you finally understood why people attend games in person, the experience was so different, exhilarating. It was like regardless of who you were, everyone was there cheering for the same thing, even the girls who were looking at you earlier were cheering with you, bright smiles filled with pride and joy despite how indifferent they were to you earlier.

In the midst of the crowd, you made your way through the bodies of people making sure to say goodbye to the small boy who accompanied you during the game. You were grateful he made sure to explain the rules of the court— it only made things easier to catch on. Gasping in shock, you felt someone grab your wrist stopping you hastily, Sunghoon.

“Congrats on winning Hoon!” You cheered, smiling widely as other students and teammates congratulated him with pats on the back and chants of victory. “It’s hard not to when someone yelling at me from the stands, ‘Sunghoon shoot the fucking ball!’ ” he mocked jokingly, his fingers finding the slim of your wrist after you brought your hands up to push his shoulder. With your eyes glued on each other, you couldn’t help but grin softly as you felt his fingers melt down your wrist and between your own. Even with the chaos around the two of you, with him, things felt like the way they should be.

A comfort you never felt with anyone else in midst of what used to be unfamiliarity. You found yourself following Sunghoon to the celebration after, your laughs filling the night sky as the two of you sat on the rooftop of the science building; looking over a lit-up field filled with Uni students drinking in victory. The cool breeze tickled your lashes as you took in the smell of flowers and plants that lined the railings and wooden pergola that was decorated with string lights. You’ve been here a few times for a couple of labs and projects, legs dangling over the side admiring the sound of distant music from the field afar.

“You take all girls you talk to here after your games?” rolling the bottle of beer between your palms, you raised a brow when he hesitated, his dark ones furrowed as a contemplating hum left his lips. Gapping you slid over slightly, mumbling in disbelief ignoring his chuckle promising he was just joking.

“You might be like…the third?” He continued, scratching the nape of his neck watching your eyes double in size before you nodded to his honest answer. “So, who was it?” You asked nonchalantly.

“To be honest I don’t think Sieun counts if she was my lab partner last semester, right?” he sighed, attempting to grab your hand only to be pushed away quickly. Sunghoon loved this part of you, trying your best to hide the relief in your eyes by shaking off the hand he purposely placed on your shoulder. It was cute, your slightly upset expression and groans accompanied by puffed-out cheeks, he loved it all.

“Sieun?” You repeated, recognizing her as a classmate from your past Chemistry course. You didn’t notice but his eyes were trailing across your shoulders that rose absentmindedly from realization, taking the chance to move closer his lips bit back a smile— glad that your eyes were finally looking up at him.

Turning away with a cough, you were able to catch yourself before falling right into his little charm, if it wasn’t Sieun there was still another girl who was here before you he hasn’t mentioned. It seemed stupid really, what were you expecting— someone like Sunghoon had girls waiting for him around the corner at every class, he was different from you. It was stupid for you to ask the question knowing you weren’t going to like the answer.

“I guess Professor Oh doesn’t count either— she was the one who lead us up here for the whole experiment and all.” he finally stated, with a sly smile his chuckle rang in your ear watching you realize he was messing with you the whole time. Much to your horror you were glad that was the truth.

With your legs swinging over the side, you flinched slightly when the breeze blew against your skin. It was pretty chilly that night and in a rush you forgot to grab the jacket you had laid out on the couch. The sound of Sunghoon shuffling pulled you back into the moment as you watched him shrug off his varsity jacket, placing it over your shoulders much to your dismay.

Muttering a small ‘thanks’, you giggled when Sunghoon nudged your side with his elbow, making it annoyingly obvious he wasn’t going to move away anytime soon, you were used to this, his little antics that always had you smiling to the point the apples of your cheeks ached. “Thanks for coming today Y/N— I mean it really.” he softly muttered meeting your eyes that smiled back at him.

“Of course, I came— I told you I keep promises.” You whispered back, your smiling fading slowly feeling his finger slowly grab onto yours.

“So if you promise to keep coming to my games…you will?” he challenged, gripping your hand softly as you nodded firmly.

“And you promise we’ll keep studying together, even after the next exam?”

“Only if you want to Hoon.”

“Then can you promise—” he paused; bringing your intertwined fingers up to his lips, the glint in his eye shining brighter than the string lights that could be mistaken as fireflies above you. It was a feeling you’ve never felt before, you wonder at times if meeting Sunghoon in these circumstances was a coincidence, maybe if you weren’t so different from him you wouldn’t think this was all a mistake. But in moments like this, when it was just the two of you in each other’s ambiance and warmth you hoped those mistakes only took you to the right place— with Sunghoon.

“Promise we’ll stay like this.” his words echoing as the two of you sat gazing at each other intently, his thumb rubbing circles around your skin as you nodded softly with a small smile. How strange was this you thought, sitting here with him felt like a dream— but you were wide awake. Feeling him lean in slightly; your fingers gripped his as the warmth of his sigh cascaded across your cheek, his bangs tickling your forehead feeling his nose brushed against yours softly. Inhaling softly you gasp when his lip touched yours ever so gently, his mole you’ve only glanced at when he wasn’t looking was staring right at you.

“Yo Sunghoon! You going to that party later this week?” A sudden voice surprised you from down below, pulling away quickly you chugged a gulp of beer eyeing the frat symbol on the jacket the boy was wearing. “Yeah, it’s Jay’s birthday, right? Think I promised a friend I was going.” he huffed out, slightly unamused from the disruption leaning on the side with one hand.

“Hey Y/N…” the guy greeted, his smile hinting a teasing tone before walking away quickly back towards the field. “You should come this weekend it’ll be fun, promise?” You heard him whisper, his lip brushing the shell of your ear softly and you had no choice but to nod.

And you truly wished you didn’t.

The weekend came in a blink of an eye and you found yourself surrounded by classmates you’ve seen around but never got the chance to mingle with. You would’ve never guessed you’d be asking Naeun for help picking an outfit for tonight but you found yourself not believing in a lot of things when it came to Sunghoon.

“Waiting for me?” You heard someone say from behind, his familiar warmth spreading across your back as a smile made its way to your lips. “Sunghoon.” You whispered, turning to embrace him as you admired his styled-up hair and simple grin.

All sense of insecurity washed away feeling him pull you in a hug, greeting his friends passing by with a bright smile as you held your drink over his shoulders; a red cup in one hand while the other patted him softly. You couldn’t help but laugh feeling him turn you in different directions to say hello to everyone greeting him. He was here with you, and he made sure to make that painfully obvious.

Since that night on the rooftop, neither you nor Sunghoon addressed the almost kiss the two of you shared—embarrassment on your part and your gut, more like Naeun’s input, told you it was gonna happen tonight…something was. At this point, it’s been a few months since you and Sunghoon have grown close, and your feelings have grown over time and so have his affections around you.

Sunghoon wasn’t afraid to make it known you were with him, whether it be holding your hand as the two of you walked on campus or stopping by classes to pick you up after lectures. He’s made a home in your apartment and you could only wonder where things would lead for the two of you if he just popped the question.

“Sunghoon the girl you showed up with just ran out.” You heard his friend whisper, his eyes suddenly darting around before pulling out his phone. You knew Sunghoon came with a friend, and you couldn’t help but worry as well seeing how panicked he was scrolling through his contacts. You’ve seen her around before, a music major— you guessed the two of them knew each other from a class or club.

“Hey can you stay here and wait for me? I’ll make it quick I promise baby.” You heard him hastily whisper, leaving you standing there nodding absentmindedly as he made his way through the crowd.

When twenty minutes turned into an hour, you found yourself sitting on the couch, checking your phone in hopes of seeing his name pop up asking where you were in the unfamiliar place. Your heart immediately jumped feeling the buzz of your notification ignoring the way the people around you were wondering why you were suddenly sitting alone, silently alone after socializing with others not that long ago.

“Naeun?” You answered quietly, digging your fingers into the fabric of the couch as you tried to tune out the mix of music and voices you couldn’t seem to understand from around you.

“I’m at the party waiting for Sunghoon but—” You flinched; yelping when someone jumped over you— laughing a hasty ‘sorry’. You reassured her you were fine but by the way your voice was trembling, she knew you were lying.

Biting your lip you could hear her concern laced voice asking you again if you were okay. Naeun offered to come along but you assured her Sunghoon would take care of you, Sunghoon would be here for you, Sunghoon—-

“Hey you’re here with Park right?” an unfamiliar voice pulled you away from call, a faint ‘I’m on my way’ brushing past your ears. Nodding, your eyes widened in realization it was Sunghoon’s friend from earlier. Naeun had hung up long ago and despite ignoring the male trying to pull you into a conversation, your mind couldn’t help but drift wondering where Sunghoon disappeared off to.

“I’m honestly surprised Sunghoon kept you around for how long he did.” Snapping your attention back to the man, your furrowed brows were enough to tell him he finally piqued your interest. “Sunghoon left a while ago with some girl, she wasn’t the one who he showed up with but he seemed pretty happy to leave.” The male shrugged, your head shaking in disbelief taking another look at your phone still cleared of notifications.

“No he said he was coming right back— he promised.” You argued softly, tensing when you felt him throw an arm over your shoulder before a red cup disrupted your view.

You weren’t sure how many cups you’d had since then, the colored lights blurring together while your cheek was leaned against whoever the fuck was closest to you. Naeun was nowhere to be seen and you could feel the alcohol hitting your system harder than it ever had before. Sunghoon still wasn’t here, you didn’t want to believe he left you here for another girl— but with no text and no sign of him anywhere, maybe it was true. His friend from earlier seemed to have disappeared as well, your last memory of him was asking you to take another shot before someone else piqued his interest.

“Y/N. Y/N stand up.” Shaking your head you threw your arm over the familiar girl who mumbled to whoever was next to you in annoyance.

“Sunghoon—”

“He’s not coming let’s go.” You heard her firmly say, dragging you carefully out of the house with your feet tripping over themselves down the stairs. Catching a brief view of the clock you realized it’s been four hours since Sunghoon said he’d be back.

“Naeun let go he’s coming back!”

“Y/N he’s not! I asked around while looking for you and they said he fucking left a while ago, he’s not coming so snap out of it.” she struggled to say, her teeth gritting together from dragging you to sit on the curbside watching the realization settle in your eyes he really did leave with someone else—when he promised.

You were prepared for this, sort of, someone like Sunghoon was just never made to be with someone like you, it was too good to be true.

You ready for this,or so you thought, the utter realization that maybe this was all fun and games for him until he got bored and moved onto the next.

You expected this, though you wished for it to never happen, yet somehow it still hurt.

“He promised.” You whispered, a tear escaping down your cheek as Naeun stood there in pity, slowly engulfed in the cloud of grief overtaking your eyes and mind— and all she could do was hope the pain would go away, or so she promised, but since that night you weren’t too sure about promises anymore.

“Ms Kim!”

“I’m so sorry, is everyone done with the quiz?” You asked while standing from your desk, smiling at the students who nodded in unison as you collected the sheets of paper passed to the front in stacks. You’ve had a rough weekend, on top of preparing for the upcoming faculty meeting you were still processing the reality that Sunghoon was indeed the new teacher in the literature department—and the new coach. With the bell ringing you dismissed everyone who seemed to be in high spirits after hearing that you weren’t assigning any homework for today.

Sitting back down you hummed in acknowledgment seeing both Jungwon and Niki by your desk, the coffee you had earlier cold in your palms grinning at the both of them shifting in their place nervously. After your talk with Sunghoon last week, the boys told you he was adamant about practice hours— being that stubborn you didn’t expect anything less.

“So can I expect to see the two of you later for tutoring? Or am I going to stop by practice to pull the both of you out myself?” Arduously looking at the two boys, you knew the answer was the latter; by their tight smiles, they didn’t have much of a choice.

You were hoping— slightly hoping Sunghoon had it in him to not be an asshole making you walk all the way to the gym where practice was being held, especially not in your stilettos. He’s always been this way, the first couple of days the two of you studied together you concluded he wasn’t much of a listener nor much of a compromiser.

And when it was time to start after school tutoring, you could only tap your heel as it’s been ten minutes since you were scheduled to start.

“Mother fucker.” You hushed under your breath, shooting up in your chair hastily, you did your best to ignore the looks from your students waiting for tutoring to start at their desks. With your heels clicking against the tiles you quickly found your way to the gym, the sound of whistles and basketballs bouncing against the gym floor echoed through the opened doors as you walked in.

It was a familiar feeling, quite familiar noting Sunghoon from across the court with a clipboard in one hand and a whistle in the other. You weren’t sure what overcame you, but you found yourself bee-lining towards the blonde— his brow quirked up from your sudden appearance.

Switching practice times was something Sunghoon just— felt like doing, well not really. Seeing you here was one of the last cursed encounters he expected to face after the last time the two of you met eyes years ago.

When your widened eyes greeted him that evening, something instantly sparked in him, nostalgia? He wasn’t sure if it was the good or bad kind yet— it felt surreal in a way. The one girl he wished he met sooner back in college was the science teacher at the new high school he was transferred to for the spring semester.

You were different, so different from the last time he’d seen you. Your usual smile that warmed his heart back then was now replaced with an unfamiliar one, a tired gaze that seemed so distant from the ones that used to look up at him in affection. Your hair was longer than before and it was weird to see you dressed in business attire when he only remembered your casual ones.

And then it hit him—it has been a while.

He liked to believe things stayed how they were before, he hoped they did— and maybe they were.

“I told you to change practice hours, how are you a literature teacher who lacks comprehension skills?”

Well, it wouldn’t be the first time he was wrong about something.

Practice was going well today, the students were finally back into a healthy energetic mindset after weeks of exams. He was aware of the eligibility rule and your request but seeing how tired most of them were, he knew it was important to let his athletes have that extra three hours of sleep. As a former student-athlete, Sunghoon knew how important it was for rest and recovery, he’ll do what he has to do to ensure his students got just that.

“You said I lack comprehension skills?” he huffed amused, his eyes on your figure recovering from walking across campus, your face visibly flushed from being winded and irritated.

“Ms.Kim this is a closed practice, does that mean you lack common courtesy to follow rules?” he argued back, roughly shoving the clipboard to the assistant without hesitation– earning a surprised grunt from the poor man.

You could practically feel your eye twitch watching the smug look overtake his features, enjoying the frustration seething from your eyes in real time.

“Maybe don’t leave the gym doors open next time if it’s a closed practice, plus Coach Lee let me in.” You grinned phonily, your upturned smile dropping instantly pushing past him as your eyes scanned the court for Niki and Jungwon. Many of the students greeted you politely despite being in the midst of drills and training. Calling their names they immediately ran towards you, a conflicted expression painting their face as a whistle was blown directly behind you.

Flinching you were greeted with a now annoyed Sunghoon eyeing the two boys behind you who were ready to leave with their things.

“Move and I’m not going to repeat myself, Mr.Park.” You exhaled tremulously, your words not really reaching his ears after noticing exactly how close you were after turning to face him.

“Don’t disrupt my practice again or I promise you’ll be dealing with a lot more than conflicting hours,” he whispered, his brows furrowing at the way your pupils wavered softly. You almost scoffed really, here you were face to face to Park Sunghoon after a long time.

You had every right and opportunity to confront him, yell at him even; asking why he left that night and why he never bothered to call or text after. The two of you after that party went back to how you were before— strangers.

Instead here you were merely inches away staring at the mole beside his nose you remember clearly. His minty breath fanned your lashes after the huffed out a sigh of disbelief. He could have ended up at any other high school, why did it have to be here?

“I don’t think you’re someone who should be making promises Sunghoon.” You sneered in a whisper, his eyes widening slightly before dropping the silver whistle from his lips. Scoffing softly you called for the two to follow you and thankfully, they did. With your heels clicking against the court, you did your best to ignore the burning sensation spreading through your chest, nodding at the students bidding you goodbye with a smile.

“I guess your talk with Coach didn’t go well the other day.” You heard Jungwon whisper, a small chuckle to lighten the mood which you appreciated. “Let’s just say Coach Park and I know each other well.” opening the door to the class with a huff, you apologized to the other kids with a smile.

“We can come every other day— if that’s okay,” Niki suggested, setting his bag on the floor taking a seat next to his teammate.

“Is he going to allow you to come every other day?” You asked with a raised brow, seeing the both of them nod genuinely you heaved a sigh and smiled softly. And to your surprise, they did come every other day, you haven’t seen Sunghoon since then, and thankfully so.

Making sure to ignore him in the faculty lounge during lunches— you even committed to coming early hours in the morning to print all your things just to avoid him in the storage units. It’s been exactly four days since your heated argument with him— Naeun saying it was fate when you mentioned it to her over the phone.

“Fate my asshole.” you cursed, gripping your shoulder bag as you got off the terminal making your way to work. It was the day of the faculty meeting you’ve dreaded while preparing for— Ms.Go appointed you as the new head of the science department at the last meeting and not many people were too fond of that. Greeting your other colleagues your eyes trailed over those who were smiling while greeting you a hello. Some were your friends and seniors you looked up to while others were just those who respected you and your efforts for your job.

“Someone is sitting here—from my department.” Blinking at the women your gaze settled on her hand blocking the chair you were going to pull out to sit in. That was a lie, you knew it was. With good people also came the ones who weren’t that nice when the news dropped that you were appointed to the new position. Nodding an apology you couldn’t help but chew on your bottom noting the only other seat left unoccupied.

Slowly setting your bag on the floor you pulled out all the paperwork needed for the meeting starting soon, ignoring the obvious stare on your right as you huffed out a sigh. Not able to ignore it any longer you gave the blonde a curt nod, brows furrowing as he didn’t acknowledge your greeting at all.

“Oh? Y/N!” A familiar voice caused you to look up from your files, grinning at the familiar smile walking back to his seat with a cup of coffee.

“Coach Lee!” You snickered softly, eyeing the extra cup of coffee he pushed towards you trying to ignore the looks from some of the older ladies down the table. Jeno was another Coach at the school for the soccer team who was also head of the math department. Being similar in age the two of you got along as assistants when you first started.

“Thank you..” giving him a soft whisper, you admired the swirls of creme floating on top of the expresso, a sigh escaping from you feeling the warmth spread between your fingers. After a couple of savoring sips, you paused as something—more like someone, was bothering you. You could only watch as Sunghoon glanced between you and the cup of coffee between your palms. His dark brows in a stern frown before scoffing and fixing his tie; it was the first time you had a good look at Sunghoon outside of his baggy sports attire after so long.

His tall nose and pushed-up hair perfectly enhanced his face while the white dress shirt snugged nicely against his shoulders. He had grown into his features, that boyish charm now replaced with a cold stare and small frown.

What was his problem? It wasn’t like you wanted to sit here in the first place, sneering slightly you took one last sip; purposefully glaring at him when your eye caught his gaze once again.

“Are you ready for the presentation? I know it’s your first one since becoming the head of your department.” You heard Jeno ask you, nodding you smiled glancing at all the paperwork you were able to compress into a ten-fifteen-minute presentation.

“I’m not going to lie I had some trouble since there’s so much to talk about but— I think I did good.” You nodded, catching his smile as he pulled out his own set of notes. “Well, you ever need my help you can always ask me, you know my hours and my email.” With a thankful nod, your smile dropped hearing someone scoff beside you— a little too loudly you noted, glancing at the blonde with an irritated glint.

Before you could ask him what his problem was Ms. Go entered the room as everyone stood to greet her respectfully. As she caught your figure her smile widened in acknowledgment that you knew many people took note of, with everyone taking their seats you could feel your palms grow clammy as each department presented one by one. Jeno’s bright smile and convincing talk about changing the math curriculum passed quicker than you expected which meant one thing, it was your turn soon— next actually.

“Ms.Kim you’re up.”

Heaving out a shaky ‘yes’ your legs felt like jelly as you gathered all your notes, glancing at the other teachers in your department giving you an encouraging smile as you passed them walking to the front. The sound of your heels clicking against the floor seemed to be the only thing echoing in your thoughts as the gazes and judgmental stares seemed to have filled your vision making you visibly tense. It was true, there were many teachers here with way more years of experience and opinions but Ms.Go and the board choose you for a reason— that’s what you kept telling yourself. After a brief introduction, you noted Ms.Go’s intent gaze causing you to stutter slightly.

“After working with the students and seeing the science program here, I have some changes that I believe would be beneficial.” Despite the scoffs heard from a few, you could feel the relief wash over you as Ms.Go nodded writing down some notes. “Looking at the curriculum a lot of the lesson plans are very outdated and don’t tend to the needs of the students now— I suggest we change our approach on what we expect from the kids. Things have changed in the new age which makes it only appropriate to change how we teach as well.”

“And we trust the kids in your hands why?” Trying your best to hold back the frown leaking through your stiff smile you turned to Ms.Jung who was part of the literature and linguistics department, honesty you were expecting this type of question to come up somewhere in your presentation. However, when some of your other colleagues began dabbling in the conversation, you couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed at the amount of unwanted opinions directed towards you and the other teachers in your department.

“Why would I take your word when I’ve been doing this for as long you’ve been alive.” Ms.Jung scoffed– her face clearly satisfied by the mess she caused making you look down in embarrassment.

“What type of meeting is this if no one listens to what is being presented.” The sudden silence was caused by Sunghoon’s slightly irritated tone, his brows in a deep frown while tapping his pen against the desk in a steady beat.

“Who do you think you’re talking to young man? I heard you’re new here and that’s how you treat your seniors—”

“What kind of seniors treats their younger colleagues that way? Ms.Kim is obviously really passionate and good at her job if she’s the science department leader… I think she knows better than anyone here what to do with the students,” he interjected, observing the way Ms.Jung looked taken aback by his sudden comment, a smug look casting over his face.

“It’s true since Ms.Kim became one of the main teachers— our science sector has seen tremendous amounts of improvement in overall scores and individual performances.” Ms.Go added with a nod, a small genuine smile making its way to your face with a humble nod.

“Working with Ms.Kim I trust her enough to listen— I hope everyone can as well.” Surprised, you gave Jeno a grateful grin before you continued your presentation, your eyes catching Sunghoon’s deepen frown making you look away confused every once in a while. He was the one who helped you in the first place so why did he look so upset?

However, you were unaware that his frown wasn’t directed towards you— but instead to Jeno who added a comment earlier he considered unnecessary, very unnecessary.

After the meeting ended you searched for Sunghoon who already made his way out of the faculty room. You wanted to thank him for deescalating the situation earlier but he never gave you a second glance the moment you sat down again beside him. Making your way through the crowd, your eye searched for the blonde male making his way down the hall before pausing at your voice calling for him.

“Hey.” You huffed fixing the bag on your shoulder, awkwardly glancing down to his hand gripping his own bag beside him. The cold air blowing from the conditioner made you shiver, you didn’t realize but your voice came out a lot softer than you expected. “I just wanted to say thank you— for earlier you know.” You could only watch as Sunghoon stared down at you, his head nodding in acknowledgment before turning away slowly.

“Wait!” You didn’t know what prompted you to grab his blazer, maybe it was the way you haven’t heard his voice in so long, but all you wanted was to savor this moment with him a little longer.

“I’ll buy you a coffee, my treat.” the offer quickly slipping from your lips.

“This wasn’t what I was thinking.” You heard him scoff beside you, leaning against the counter with his arms crossed as you mixed coffee and some milk from the faculty vending machine. With a grin you shrugged your shoulders, ripping some sugar packets before whisking with a spoon, a drink that you often had going through hell and back since working here.

“Well Coach Lee and I would whip this up for each other ever since the both of us started as assistants, it’s my treat so be grateful at least.” You mumbled, throwing away all the trash while admiring the way the coffee swirled from the momentum of your mixing. His expression still cold as he pulled his phone from his pocket ignoring your statement.

You didn’t know why but this was making you slightly annoyed— hurt even. The two of you were colleagues now and you were doing your best to extend an olive branch despite what happened in the past. The least he could do was—

Your eyes widen slightly at an unfamiliar scent mixed with the bitterness of the coffee, lashes fluttering as you felt his arm brush your chest faintly. Grabbing the cup of coffee from your grasp, you could only watch as Sunghoon took a sip from the drink, his furrowed brows relaxing softly seeing you look up to him in a daze.

“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to drink it— jeez.” Taking another long sip, your lips lifted slightly seeing him finish the drink in one go.

“The coffee isn’t going to run away from you Mr. Park slow down.” You huffed, picking up your bag before making your way to the door; a slight warmth spreading throughout your chest hearing him call out your name as you didn’t bother turning back.

Since then none of the other teachers have bothered you in and out of the faculty meetings, you weren’t sure if it was because of Sunghoon or the fact they’ve accepted your new position— but it was one less thing to worry about. And to your surprise since your little barista session, the two of you kept it respectful and greeted each other whether it be passing in the halls or coincidentally seeing each other in the storage room; it was better than acting like each other’s existence didn’t matter because deep down— you at least knew it did.

“Right, so you need to move all the pH variables to this side and—” While helping some of the kids, you were interrupted by the sound of your door opening hastily. Immediately fixing your posture, your eyes widened at the sight of Sunghoon standing at the doorway with Niki and Jungwon. His gaze looked around the room almost in embarrassment with his hands shoved in his track pants. It was the first time he was in your class after your first encounter at the start of the month.

“I forgot it was your day with the kids— here.” You heard him say, pushing the two who were still dressed in their athletic clothing as he huffed a cough from your soft greeting towards the both of them.

“Well they’re doing really well recently so I wouldn’t have minded the two of them staying with you.” Pushing your hands into your back pockets, you stood next to Sunghoon after giving Jungwon a small pat on the back with a sigh. With the first big game against the rival school coming soon— you understood the need for practice on the court.

“If I didn’t know what both of you were talking about I’d assume it was about co-parenting,” Niki mumbled throwing his bag on the floor after you failed to greet him the same way you did Jungwon. Hearing a few snickers from the other students you quickly denied his statement, blinking rapidly as you moved away from an equally flustered Sunghoon who was mentioning extra laps around the track if Niki didn’t get to work.

After a few minutes of settling everyone in their seats, you noted Sunghoon still by the door, “Are you not going to return to practice?” You asked him, watching his eyes flicker back to you after gazing into space again.

“Oh— my assistant has it covered, the boys are just doing a practice game so I don’t really need to be there.” He nodded ruffling his track pants quietly. With a nod you motioned for him to have a seat at the lab tables if he wished to.

“Well you’re welcome to stay if you want to, I’m just going to go over a few topics before assigning practice worksheets.” You told him with a grin. Sunghoon obviously took the opportunity to stay as for the past couple of days; he purposely changed his route around campus to find more opportunities to run into you.

It’s just been—- so long. Hearing your voice again somehow pulled him back into this warm serenity he’s been missing for years. Your soft laugh that rang like wedding bells in his ear resurfaced drowned out thoughts and emotions that kept him up during the night and distracted him during the day. Things didn’t end the way he wished—nor did they end the way he thought they would.

He should’ve never asked you to go to that damn party, the two of you were fine before that whole hell hole. Sunghoon trusted you— trusted you when it came to tutoring him to his full potential and trusted you to be honest when it came to if his hair looked weird in the morning. But he never thought he had to question his trust when it came to your feelings towards him.

One minute he left to go find a friend who was light years braver than him when it came to words of love and confession— and the next he came back to you with another person; another man. An acquaintance, one who never really had good things to say about him. To see you leaning against him with your face cradled into his neck sharing shots together, made his stomach drop.

Dread? Sorrow? Regret?

What else was there to say, he hadn’t asked to you be his girlfriend officially yet since he was so scared.

Of rejection? No. Commitment? No, so what was it?

There he was, standing in the midst of the party seeing you slip away from his fingers in what felt like seconds, and he never looked back.

Pride? Prejudice? He was sure the english novel that was apart of his assignment at the time persuaded the labels listed but things seemed better off this way. He never reached out and you didn’t either— apart of him hoped you did, but seeing you pass him on campus reassured him that maybe he was expecting too much; and he did.

Years later despite what happened, he couldn’t help but feel a part of him yearn for that fulfillment again. To feel your hands cradling his face, your voice warming him in love and solace. But he concluded since those days being someone who feels too deeply— is just too exhausting.

“Woah—” Sunghoon mumbled out of his daze, your hand slamming slightly on the lab table startled him as the students left one by one as it’s been almost an hour since tutoring started. “Tutoring is over, you can leave now Coach Park.” holding back a grin, you couldn’t help but snicker at his flustered expression, something you haven’t seen in a while. Sunghoon stood hastily— embarrassed as his two athletes were glancing at him with slight snickers.

“Hey! Be ready for practice tomorrow, on time or I’m adding two extra sets to each workout.” Despite Niki and Jungwon’s teasing gaze towards him as they left— ones you didn’t notice, Sunghoon couldn’t help but shift in place seeing you struggle to put all the chairs on top of the tables for evening cleaning.

Moving to help you, the sound of the clock ticking and chairs scratching against the tile floor filled the unfamiliar silence that surrounded you btoh— unfamiliar in a way where for the first time in a while for you and him; the silence didn’t have to hurt anymore.

“Are you heading home soon?” You heard him ask beside you, glancing out the window with the sun setting in the distance; you let out a tired sigh with a nod.

“Okay I’ll go grab my things and walk you to the lot, meet me in front.” Before you could deny his request he was already out your door in a blink. A small snicker escaped your lips as you swiftly went to gather your things, you weren’t sure what was going through that little mind of his at the moment, but a part of you was glad he wasn’t acting like the two of you were complete strangers.

“Is your car this way?” you heard him ask, the two of you meeting outside your hall before walking to the front of the school.

“Uh— I’m actually taking the bus, my car is still in the dealer because the breaks were acting up last month.” running a hand through your hair you thanked him softly for walking you this far until you felt him grab ahold of your forearm.

“Then I’ll just take you home it’s probably on the way—”

“No! I’ll probably stop by to get dinner, it’s fine really you don’t have to.” You reassured him, doing your best to pull away from his grasp that only tightened the more you resisted.

“Then let’s just catch up.” His suggestion makes you pause in shock, “I should probably eat dinner too.” How could you say no, he was looking at you with those hopeful eyes again, a glint of excitement in them when you unconsciously nodded to his offer.

“Auntie can we have two bowls please!” you called out— greeting the workers you saw often at the local noodle shop with a smile sitting down across Sunghoon, you thanked the waiter who was placing drinks infront of the both of you.

“You seem to come here often, is it that good?” His light-hearted comment caused you to chuckle as you passed him the utensils from the box.

“Once you eat what I ordered you won’t question my taste again.” Slightly glaring at him your cheeks immediately lifted as his laugh filled the booth.

“That’s what you said about that one pizza place on campus— I’m sure you remember the fish bones underneath the cheese.” he pointed out, his foot tapping yours slightly as your lips puckered at the memory of Sunghoon pulling out a few fish bones from his slice of pizza.

It was one of your weekend dates where you offered to find a place for dinner, despite it being one of the worst meals you’ve had during college it was a sweet memory the two of you cherished.

“And there wasn’t even fish on the menu.” with your expression in a scrunch, a smile broke onto your face as Sunghoon’s dimple was full display, recalling the utter horror the both of you shared realizing the crunches on your pizza weren’t dried onions.

“Okay this does look good…”Gawking at the bowl of hot noodles in front of him, Sunghoon couldn’t help but dig in as you nodded watching him sip the broth; savoring the taste and warmth of each spoonful.

You and Sunghoon did have many cherishing moments together. Figured as time went by you could push down these memories and hopefully, they would fade away the same way your happiness did with each passing month. Maybe the storm brewing in your heart could wash away any traces of him you had left in your mind, but of course, those prayers went unanswered.

You hoped it was one of those instances where you missed the memories more than the person, but deep down you knew that wasn’t true. Just a mental coping mechanism to convince yourself the closure you never got wasn’t the one thing you needed to move on with what happened.

Why? Self-depreciation perhaps, emotions do that to a person. Maybe it clicked that you simply refused to let go of the memories— feelings you felt when things were good till they weren’t as it was a reminder that what you had was a good thing that should’ve never ended.

But maybe it needed to.

“You were right this place is pretty good.” He huffed a chuckle, watching your eyes travel back to your bowl as you scoffed slightly.

“Niki and Jungwon don’t have to come every other day anymore, they should be fine with eligibility just send them when you can.” You nodded finishing the last of your meal, Sunghoon sat watching you quietly as you hummed with each bite. You kept your habits over the years, fingers pushing your hair behind your ears ever so often to the way your eyes were unable to meet his when you spoke or caught his gaze by accident, it was all the same.

“And I know I’ve said this already but seriously thank you—for speaking up during the meeting,” pausing your eyes met his as the soft music within the restaurant feathered your words of appreciation.

“They haven’t bothered me since which takes so much stress off of me.” With a small laugh, you expected him to follow, but your expression falls short when you noted his contemplating eyes gazing down with a frown.

With the two of you here in the moment, despite the cordial decency you wanted to keep, Sunghoon couldn’t help but wish to know the truth. In the few months it took for the two of you to grow close, there was always the unknown if you would be more than friends. After being accustomed to your minuscule characteristics and habits, something never truly settled right with him about what happened.

You just weren’t that type of person.

If things never worked out between the both of you it would’ve been because a few reasons, but none of them being what he saw that night. Your slight aggression towards him now after the obvious change of attitude from that night told him maybe things weren’t the way it seemed.

“Stop thanking me, just take it as a very delayed thank you for helping me graduate.” He huffed out, making sure to keep the cordial atmosphere you tried so hard to create during work despite the curiosity brewing inside him.

“Speaking of graduation, did you miss the ceremony? I don’t remember seeing you when I went for friends who were in the same major.” he finally spit out—his question obviously making you freeze, you weren’t expecting him to bring up anything from back then.

But Sunghoon was always full of surprises.

“Uh— yeah I, actually attended an overseas internship so that required me to leave a few days before the ceremony.” Picking the vegetables in your bowl, you could practically feel his gaze burning holes into you. Sunghoon knew you were lying, but he wasn’t going to let you know that.

“Are you sure it didn’t have anything to deal with what happened?” your jaw tensed as you set down the pair of chopsticks bringing your eyes to meet his.

“And what exactly are you referring to Sunghoon?” voice tinted with anger taking in the solemn expression that suddenly overtook his face.

“Are you recalling to the fact I was in between what I wanted to do with my major so I took an extra semester to graduate or the fact the both of us just— went back to pretending like we were strangers?” You didn’t know what snapped inside you, past anger and resentment like skeletons in a closet finally acknowledged for the first time; in a long time.

“Strangers?” Sunghoon scoffed, trailing his eyes away from you to the empty booth beside you two in exasperation. “You think what happened was something that happened for the fuck of it? Is that all it was to you?” his tone cold looking back at you.

Confusion? Indignation? You couldn’t pinpoint what exactly blossomed when your eyes met, but something made his eyes turn cold as the realization settled that you weren’t the only one hurting. Eyes that once looked at you with warmth and tenderness now looked at you in vexation.

“You made a promise you couldn’t keep then left taking no responsibility like the coward you were.” slamming the money you found to cover the bill on the table, you stood from your seat in a hurry. You did your best to make things seem as if the two of you shared nothing more than a few classes back in college; normal— so why the hell did he have to show up in your life again when you were starting to realize what’s coming will be better than what was gone.

“Wait Y/N let’s just talk—”

“There’s nothing to talk about Sunghoon! You made things painfully clear that night so please just… pretend like we don’t know each other.” And with a frown you left, this whole acting normal bit was bullshit to begin with. Sitting back down in the booth Sunghoon couldn’t help but curse as the sight of your back leaving the shop quickly seemed a little too familiar.

Instead of clarity, he left with more questions to fill his thoughts at night.

“And you’re saying he was basically hinted you were the reason things didn’t work out.” Naeun pointed out; brows raised in revelation as the both of you were seated in your living room, cans of beer lining the coffee table alongside bags of snacks she prepared after asking her to come over. After your small altercation with Sunghoon last night you really needed another opinion on the situation— and a drink.

“Well, he didn’t say it but it felt like he was insinuating it— I don’t know! Either way, I saw what I saw and heard what I heard, and you did too.” whining slightly you took one last gulp from the nearly empty can before crushing it within your palm. You thought it was ridiculous how Sunghoon had the impudence to turn this around on you, but what would be the reason?

“Y/N just ignore him, it’s not worth thinking about it this much… I say you distract yourself with that cute coworker you’ve been friends with.” she chuckled passing you another can which you accepted with a frown.

“You mean Jeno?”

“Well— you said he was your type and the two of you get along well, I say why not.” she shrugged, nodding to the beat of the music playing from your speaker you let out a sigh of… consideration.

It was true, the both of you always got along well, both in the work setting and away. Maybe you were too busy with forwarding your career, but you never thought about getting involved romantically with anyone else, that’s what you told yourself.

And there was truth to it, in the years since you’ve accomplished a lot in your line of work. Aspirations became reachable goals, and you were finally at a point in your career which you considered stable for your age and experience. You wouldn’t lie and say you didn’t try to to talk to other men in these few years, but they just never worked out, they weren’t—

“Sunghoon is going to be a part of the school festival committee with you?” Blinking out from your daze, you nodded bringing your knees to your chest. “You make it sound like it’s just the two of us.” Chuckling slightly you popped open another can of beer to refresh the lingering bitterness on your tongue.

“But yes, the Science and Literature department are paired up for the festival. I’ll just do my best to ignore him but I’ll be hard if he keeps being confrontational.”

“Are you sure you’ll be fine?” Nodding at her softly you gave her a hug thanking her for coming over to make you feel better.

“Go— your clingy boyfriend is about to call me again asking if you’re coming home.” With a smile she flicked you off before bidding you goodbye quietly in the hall outside of your condo.

Naeun always found you and Sunghoon odd, how such contrasting individuals were able to grow so fond of one another, adapt to each other so quickly and willingly. You were kind at heart with a mind that was filled with never-ending dreams while he was someone who lived in the moment with a dubious reserved mind. You’d think two people of similar nature would get along much better, but once she met her own lover in her grad years, she understood that wasn’t the case.

“Yeah can I get one americano with milk please.” Glancing up from her phone, Naeun had to glance again to make sure what she saw— more like who, wasn’t who she thought it was. Naeun was here to have a drink before meeting with her boyfriend for a date to end the weekend, and the last person she expected to see was the guy her best friend was reviling last night.

“Park Sunghoon what are you doing here?” being just as shocked as she was, Sunghoon gave her an amused nod before walking over with his receipt. “She wasn’t lying when she said you were back huh, what are you doing getting coffee this afternoon.” Acknowledging his backpack she let out a hum when he told her he was here to fish a few assignments he had for upcoming lesson plans.

Shifting on his feet, Sunghoon offered for them to take a seat recognizing that glint in Naeun’s glare that he knew well from before— she had questions, and he could guess about who.

“Did you know Y/N worked there before coming?” Being thrown off by the sudden question, Sunghoon couldn’t help but choke a bit on his coffee. Americano with milk and sugar, a staple he grew to love after you made him a slightly different version a while back at work.

“If I knew she was here I wouldn’t have taken the offer.” With a raised brow Naeun couldn’t help but scoff slightly.

“Wow you really do have the uttermost audacity.” leaning back in her chair as Sunghoon stared at her in confusion.

“Listen I know you’re friends so you’d defend her despite anything and I’m not demeaning you for that—”

“And what would I be defending her for? Giving you a chance when other people were making her feel like she shouldn’t have? You broke her heart Sunghoon, embarrassed her in front of people who didn’t even know her.” Rolling her eyes Naeun was growing frustrated looking at the way his upset expression turned confused.

“Don’t act stupid Sunghoon people saw and told Y/N, people even told me that you left with some girl that night and never came back.” Sitting in silence, Naeun couldn’t help but cross her arms at the sudden quietude overcoming the table, the silent noise in the background filling the empty ambiance between the two.

“Are you finally remembering now? Because I had to show up and pull Y/N off some—”

“Wait. Who told you that, who told her that? I told Y/N I was going to look for a friend— but I never left… she knows that.” A shift in his voice was clearly acknowledged by Naeun as she sat up in her seat shaking her head.

“I don’t know it was some guy she kept saying was your friend when I found her; drunk and delirious might I add, but she trusted you.” Disappointment laced her tone while Sunghoon looked away, thoughts running miles she could see, his eyes darting from the busy sidewalk outside back to the blending of coffee beans at the counter.

“I went to go talk to a friend— who I ended up not being able to find, then I came back and she was with an acquaintance I knew…he was all over her and I don’t know.” rubbing the paper cover over his cup, Sunghoon felt the weight shifting off his shoulders being able to finally talk to someone about what happened. But when Naeun didn’t respond; he couldn’t help but look up only to be met with bundled-up tissue paper thrown at him.

“You think she would really do that to you Sunghoon? She liked you, way too much for that to happen.” Hissing through her teeth Naeun couldn’t help but let out a frustrated sigh, not at Sunghoon— but to you as well. What type of misunderstanding led to two different views of what happened?

Running his fingers through his hair Sunghoon couldn’t help but grimace at her response. “Naeun that guy she was with was someone who showed interest in her before, he was a teammate of mine and I don’t know—”

“Well that would explain why he told people you left with someone else. I found her leaning against someone else for support because that asshole got her drunk and then left to god knows where.” With his eyes doubling in size, he couldn’t exactly explain the feeling traveling through him as he chugged the last of his coffee in one go. Foolishness? He knew better than to think you would do that, a mix of internal and external variables engrained him with a different memory than what happened.

But was it wrong for him to feel slightly hopeful?

Cursing was the only thing Sunghoon could do sitting with this new information as Naeun finally understood the grasp of how big the misunderstanding was.

“Is she at home now?” His question caused her gaze to snap toward him with a nod. “Then I should go talk to her about this—this mistake.” Stopping him quickly, Sunghoon knew it was imprudent to confront you at the moment, with what happened a few days ago he could conclude you probably wanted nothing else to do with him.

“Well you see, I might or might not have encouraged her to move on and forget about you and everything that happened.” Sheepishly scratching her cheek, she rolled her eyes as Sunghoon reassured her it was nothing to be sorry for.

“And I may or may not have told her to take a chance with the cute Coach from the math department.”

“Oh.”

Naeun couldn’t help the guilt taking over her expression as Sunghoon sat down slowly with a slight frown, realization hitting him that she meant Jeno.

So you were considering Jeno all this time.

“Trust me when I say it was just a suggestion, she seemed conflicted about it first just… try to talk to her when you can, I promise she’ll listen.”

Well, she lied.

Every chance he took to talk to you never seemed to work out for him, from seeing you in the staff lounge to the storage units and printing stations— you were ignoring him, and he knew that.

Somehow you always finished lunch when it was his turn to have a break or you managed to print all your paperwork magically when he showed up to the storage units after calculating your routes in between classes. It was hopeless.

“Coach!”

“Yeah sorry, um you two not going to tutoring today?” Tapping his fingers on the clipboard, Sunghoon could only watch as Jungwon shook his head with a grin knowing he caught his coach dazing off— again.

“Nope! Ms.Kim said we’re all good with eligibility.”

“He’s only asking because he wants to walk us to class again… right Coach Park?” Grabbing Niki by his jersey, Sunghoon couldn’t help but pull him into a headlock as the younger boy laughed at the teasing. He wasn’t sure when kids suddenly became aware of feelings; especially his, but if you asked the boys they would’ve said it was obvious from the way his eyes followed you when you were around. Or the way his head turns immediately at the mention of your name by staff or students.

But if you asked Niki thinks its obvious from the way he always volunteers to walk them to tutoring, your tutoring.

“Sunghoon!” Letting go of Niki he turned to see Jeno greeting him coming in from the outside field with the soccer team. Being the main coaches on campus it was expected the both of them would see each other often— unfortunately for him, as the idea that you were somehow considering on pursuing something with Jeno did not sit well with him. Sending him a nod, he couldn’t help but roll his eyes as the boys greeted their ‘favorite’ math teacher.

“It’s not that hard to do math you know, I could help the two of you if you need it.” He sighed nonchalantly, crossing his arms as the two scoffed at him chugging their water bottles. “No offense Coach Park but why would we ask you if we have a math teacher who’s willing to tutor us?” Shaking his head Niki walked away leaving Sunghoon gawking, the whistle falling from between his lips as Jungwon shifted on his toes awkwardly.

“Coach it’s true, plus Mr.Lee is super nice don’t worry! I always see him with Ms.Kim in the morning before class starts— yeah hold up!” Grinning at his teammates he gave Sunghoon one last knowing grin before running off to the others.

“What do they know about being super nice?” He mumbled, blowing the whistle while motioning towards his assistant coach to go through with another round of cardio.

It was funny really.

“Do you know today’s date?” Glancing between you working on a few notes and the other teachers talking about their plans for the upcoming school festival, he was grateful for agreeing to participate. Despite being one of the only people in his department to take charge of the role, Sunghoon truly was here to find a chance to talk to you— even if it meant asking for today’s date.

Seeing you weren’t paying much attention to him, he made sure to clear his throat a little louder this time.

“What’s today’s date?”

“It’s the twentieth…” Dropping his pen on the table, his jaw clenched hearing Jeno answer instead, his tone slightly annoyed at Sunghoon asking you the same question repreatedly.

“I wasn’t asking you.” He mumbled quietly, causing the latter to roll his eyes as he stated the date for Sunghoon to acknowledge again.

He didn’t care.

“What’s today’s date?” Sunghoon asked again, this time directly asking you with a tint of hope in his voice.

“O-oh it’s the twentieth.” You told him with a small smile, going back to answering questions some of the other teachers had about preparation time and supplies. With a successful smug, Sunghoon glanced over at Jeno who shook his head out of bewilderment.

He found this to be an improvement, hell this was the first thing you’ve said to him since the dinner from over a week ago. “Do you need help with this?” You heard him ask, before you could answer Sunghoon was already grabbing the boxes you were carrying back to the paperwork room.

“Yeah, you can just leave them here.” You pointed out, an awkward grin on your lips knowing the last time you spoke to him wasn’t the friendliest.

“Hey I’m sorry about last time, I shouldn’t have blown up on you the way I did so I apologize—”

“No you shouldn’t apologize I sort of antagonized you so I’m the one who should be saying sorry.” He interjected, bringing his hands up in an attempt to stop you from interrupting him with a small huff.

“Sunghoon I just don’t want us to be fighting anymore, it’s been so long we should both just get over it— I’m ready to forget about it if you are.” thinking it was the best solution you huffed softly seeing Sunghoon slowly nod shoving his hands in his pockets with a slight frown.

“Is this not what you wanted?” Seeing him slowly bring his gaze up to yours, you released a relieved sigh as he nodded quietly.

“Yeah I really do Y/N.” With a small smile, you nodded as the sound of other teachers down the hall interrupted the two of you.

“Great because I’m gonna need a lot of help for the upcoming festival.” You pointed out, standing beside him letting the other staff walk into the room past you with a grin.

“And I’ll be there to help you, always.” You heard him mumble beside you, heart fluttering lightly as your fingers gripped the fabric of your pants.

You weren’t sure if your olive branch was going to do much in effort when it came to Sunghoon but— the two of you were now on good terms, really good terms to say.

Maybe it was the effort of meeting up before or after school to brainstorm ideas for the festival but apart of you felt somewhat displeased. It was stupid really, you were upset when he was too caught up in the past with what happened, but now you were slightly displeased at the fact he was willing to forget everything just like that.

Complicated— you knew.

The sudden knock against the wood door made you flinch lightly from your desk as the sight of Sunghoon made you grin. After a few hours of grading papers, you didn’t notice the setting sun and quiet halls. Sunghoon has been coming either before or after school to discuss plans and set up ideas for the festival, when you learned he out of everyone signed up to run his department, a part of you grew in excitement.

Seeing him at your door right now made you realize that, whether the halls and classes were empty in the bright early mornings or late in the setting sun, part of you felt a bit of self-sorrow.

It reminded you of the way you were back in college, waiting for each other after classes with exciting smiles and playful hands. If things stayed the way they were, would the two of you have made it this far? Even if the exciting smiles turned into tired ones, and warm hugs replaced the playful ones— you could only leave it up to your imagination.

“Hey.” You whispered, his coming figure making you drop your pen softly. Eyes widening you scoffed as Sunghoon placed a cup of warm coffee on your desk. “I figured you needed a quick coffee break seeing how you’re still working this late.” He sighed, sitting ontop of one of the desk in front of you.

“You came earlier?” His hum was enough to let you know he did as you were busy in your own world to be bother any further. “Isn’t this the coffee combo I made you before?” Your voice slightly amused as he nodded with a chuckle.

“Yeah it’s been my go-to since you made me one— I guess you just know exactly what I like.”

“So I think the class came to a consensus on their final ideas for the festival.” Changing the subject quickly, you failed to realize Sunghoon caught the sight of your eyes wavering, flustered.

“Oh yeah? What did they choose, our class came down to one as well.” Blinking quickly you did your best to remain calm as Sunghoon made his way around your desk beside you, his cologne tickling your nose while trying to ignore the obvious sound of your chair squeaking from scooting back slightly.

“I-I think they all agreed to do a snack booth.” You replied, focusing your gaze across the room to the lab tables, an attempt to prevent your cheeks from heating up in embarrassment. “The kids chose a photobooth, I think that’s a good combination for our section.” He commented earning a nod from you.

The feeling of something fluttering against your hair made you to flinch until the calluses of Sunghoon’s fingers caressing a few strands of hair came into view.

“Stop overworking yourself.” he whispered.

“I’m not Sunghoon I’m just behind on a few assignments is all.” You reasoned, leaning back into your seat as his fingers continued to play through your loose strands of hair. Being alone for so long, you often forget what it’s like to have someone asking you from time to time to slow down.

But to Sunghoon it was just one of your habits he knew you couldn’t get rid of, meticulous and compassionate to what you put your mind to, that was what he loved about you. But he knew it was important to put a limit on that habit. He knew you didn’t like people critiquing your work style as it was what you were used to— a small detail he noted back when you grew frustrated at the professor for telling you to take a break.

“Okay I believe you.” He sighed in a whisper, fingers still brushing the side of your face before continuing.

“Just remember to rest from time to time… sleep can’t wait but graded assignments can.” he reasoned making you giggle slightly at how unserious he was with a nod.

“The kids wanted me to let you know they’re expecting to see you at the game this Friday— especially Niki.” he brought up, leaning an arm against the head of your chair as you looked up at him confused. You haven’t been to any of the school games on campus, to be fair any games really since back in college when you went to support Sunghoon.

“I think it’ll be important for them that their favorite teacher is there so think about it.” you heard him say, he knew you had a soft spot for the boys and they had one for you.

And so here you were, after days of debating whether you were going to show up or not, you found yourself standing in your classroom overlooking the line of supporters outside the entrance to the gym.

The moment you step foot onto the court, you noticed the home side of the bleachers were lined with hand-painted posters and school-colored streamers hanging from the ceiling of the gym, visible around the poles of the bleachers and floor of the gym. The loud cheering from the student section and low percussion from the band brought a smile to your face, it felt familiar yet so unfamiliar.

“Ms. Kim?” Smiling at the flushed boy you waved at him as he called over for the taller one with a grin.

“You made it! I didn’t think you were coming,” Niki exclaimed with a towel wrapped around his neck.

“Of course I came! You know I have some basketball knowledge up my sleeve.” you winked as two of them laughed feeling you pat them on the shoulder in encouragement. You recognized many students from class and coworkers with anticipating expressions, being one of the biggest games this season the energy was high, high in excitement and pressure.

Trailing your eyes across the gym, it was a surprise to see so many people from the enemy team seated on the opposite side, school colors contrasting against each other as the tension grew on the court. Before you knew it, a grin ghosted on your face as your wondering gaze paused on Sunghoon; dressed in his suit with his clipboard in hand and a pen in the other. His brows were pulled into a frown behind his styled locks looking across the court to the other coach with a scowl, typical competitive Sunghoon.

You didn’t know what but something made you nervous, maybe it was because haven’t been in this type of environment in so long? Or maybe you were feeling the the stress from all the players on the sideline.

The moment his eyes met yours, it was like seeing him for the first time again at his game.

Nostalgia, you were nervous because you knew coming here would’ve made you reminisce on all the good times you had with him those years ago.

You were shown nostalgia was the hearts way of reminding you of what you once loved, what you once cherished. It wasn’t like someone told you, you learned to acknowledge it over the years.

Through your favorite song that oftened played on the radio station you two enjoyed, Goodnight Radio. Photos and scents… nostalgia seemed to have always traveled to you, leaving a bittersweet feeling as sometimes happy memories make you sad–- despite the intended meaning of those words.

You gave him a shy smile, Sunghoon’s grin widening as he nodded in acknowledgement ignoring the looks of Niki and Jungwon glancing between you two. Finding your seat amongst the students, you were happy most of them greeted you with enthusiasm, partly shocked to see you here in the first place.

“I’m surprised to see you here. Not really since I knew you’d come.” Sunghoon called out to you from the benches, yelling over the loud crowd in excitement as the band performance was coming to an end. You knew how important this was for Sunghoon, coming from a background where he was once in their position— this was a big game for him.

Sure, you knew it would reflect on him as this was his first game as the coach, but you knew how important it was to him to win, for the team and for himself.

“And who would I be not coming to support my students?” You yelled back, his smirk widening as he flung his clipboard towards the assistant coach who flinched, you figured he’d be used to that by now. His cheeky grin complimented his smiling eyes and it made you realize this was were Sunghoon belonged, on the court where he always called home.

As the game continued, you knew it was going to be an even game— with the team leading alongside a new coach, it was expected for a few mistake calls here and there. But being against a long time rival defending their wining title, everyone was tense throughout the first half. With the crowd growing weary you could see the stress seeping through Sunghoons stern expression.

You couldn’t help but dismay your feelings aside noting Sunghoon motioning Niki in with a frown, he’s been missing all his shots and making many out of play moves costing the team points and fouls. Flopping on the bench, the boy was told to calm down by Sunghoon who went back to strategizing with the team with a tight frown on his face.

With his head hung low and chest heaving— you stood up making your way down to the benches, away from the rest of the team where Niki was sitting.

“Niki.” Whispering to him, you heart melted seeing his upset expression under the towel draped around his head. He reminded you a lot of your brother back then, passionate and driven by the game but also very emotional in the heat of the moment; that could lead to some bumps in the road— you knew better than anyone growing up with it.

“Ms. Kim I keep messing it up for the team.” You heard him groan, his fingers tightly intertwined trying to blur out the loud crowd from all around.

“It’s not just your fault Niki, like you said it’s a team… you win as a team you lose as a team—and you mess up as a team.” Nodding slowly you grinned seeing him losen the tight grip on his fingers.

“You know Sunghoon only benched you because you were getting upset, not because you’re bad. The last thing he wants is for you to put the blame all on yourself….but he shouldn’t have made that three pointer call if you want to point fingers.” You chuckled, grateful to see his smile again despite the sweat lining his hair. You noted the way his eyes flickered back to the group of players— huddled together as Sunghoon was desperately trying to keep his team together.

____________

“You guys we can still win the game we just need to calm down and rethink our strats.” Sunghoon couldn’t help but feel anxious at the sight of the scoreboard before them, they were ten points down and one of his best players is sitting out for the rest of the quarter for his own sake. He knew how they felt, the pressure to perform well and to win against one of the biggest rivals this year, he saw himself in many of the players on his team.

But instead of forcing them to go through the burden and anger he grew familiar with, he knew it was the right thing to do seeing how upset Niki was getting both on and off the court.

“Coach we need Niki— he’s usually the one leading all the plays down the court, it’s gonna be hard to get past their defense.” Jungwon breathlessly stated.

“ I know but I’m not gonna force him to play when he’s spiraling, we’re just gonna have to play around not having him in the formation.” From his peripheral, his eyes caught your figure rushing back into the crowd— sitting amongst the other students and supporters with a heartfelt expression.

“Coach Park!”

Seeing Niki rush over, he was surprised to see a smile plastered across his flushed face.

“I can play Coach, I’m good.” despite his reassurance Sunghoon was still skeptical noting he wasn’t this spirited a few minutes ago. “Niki I’m not sure if—”

“Coach I didn’t come to play today just to lose.” he made sure to emphasize, and it all clicked for him— a familiar phrase that rang in his ear like bells.

‘I didn’t come just to see you lose.’

It was a joke you’ve always said to him before his games to shake the nerves off his shoulders, even through the wins and losses he knew you were there to support him regardless of the results, and a part of him missed that. It was just something that ticked his heart a bit from the memories.

Bringing his gaze to yours, despite the rather obvious intent to look away— you knew Sunghoon understood your intent; he needed to give Niki the reassurance you gave him.

“Okay, I believe in you but you gotta believe in yourself kid—all of you do.” grinning at the team, Sunghoon felt relieved to see everyone jump in excitement despite the fatigue that overtook their faces not long before this. With less than a quarter left, he knew this was the last push both physically and mentally for the boys— with the whistle blowing the sound of the crowd grew both in excitement once again.

Niki was in a whole different state of mind compared to before the timeout, with both him and Jungwon finally on the same page; gaining points back was easy. However, with the other team being the best of the best, the score was still close— too close. With the clock ticking down and the difference being two points, either the team had to score a three-pointer or prevent the rival team from tieing.

“Niki go, run!” you suddenly exclaimed, ignoring the looks from those around as you could see the thoughts running through his mind faster than his feet were. With his fingers gripping the ball, you could feel your own gripping your pants. This was it. The adrenaline, the rush, the quick silence as everyone held their breath down to the last millisecond.

This was what you missed.

A wide smile made its way to your face, seeing Niki and Jungwon jumping in both happiness and exhaustion as the students ran to the court to celebrate with them— you could only smile.

They won, despite being the underdogs; they won fair and square. Nodding in satisfaction, you gave both of them a proud thumbs up as the both of them kept waving towards you in the crowd. If you were a little younger you would’ve found yourself down there with them.

But despite the happy occasion, it felt bittersweet. You were happy, so happy for the team but you didn’t want the neglected feelings you’ve tried so hard to push away overtake the joyousness you should be feeling.

What should you be feeling?

What were you feeling?

“Y/N!” Turning towards a familiar voice, your heart shunk realizing why the dread you’ve been feeling for the past couple weeks have been eating you up inside.

“We did it! They did it.” Sunghoon grinned down towards you in joy.

You noticed it that one evening— you could still see the Sunghoon you met in college, filled with drive and passion both in basketball and life. He wanted to do a lot of things, visit a lot of places, and accomplish a lot of things. You’ve never admitted it but, it tore you up inside wondering if he ever wanted you to be a part of that.

Has he been well since then?

Did he still think of you the way you thought of him?

Were over-easy eggs with a pinch of salt and garlic still his favorite?

What you and he had, is it gone— forever? You never admitted it, but he always lingered in the back of your mind without effort.

“What’s wrong?” You heard him ask you, shaking your head you held back a small cry trying to pass it off as being emotional for the boys. Your response was hushed out by the loud crowd while your eyes trailed to focus on something else other than Sunghoon who recongized that small glint in your gaze.

“Well I think we can thank you for talking some sense into Niki.” he blurted out, making you shake your head in defiance still admiring the confetti falling from above with a small smile. Sunghoon couldn’t help but admire the way your glossy eyes shimmered from the silver confetti falling above, they looked like the stars he used name in his head while stargazing with you on the campus lawn.

“I owe you one— after this actually if that’s okay.”

What you didn’t expect was Sunghoon secretly picking you up after the game behind the school. With kids celebrating in the main parking lot and on the field, the last thing you wanted was for a rumor to start about the science teacher and coach leaving with each other after the game.

“Sorry did you wait long?” he whispered unlocking the door for you, shaking your head with a chuckle you slid in leaving your things in the backseat swiftly.

“Are you picking a place to eat this time?” you grinned softly, his laugh echoing lightly throughout the car as he quickly pulled out of the parking lot passing by familiar faces you’ve seen in the halls.

“Well it wouldn’t be much of a treat if you did all the work— did anyone see you?” He asked, eyeing you from his peripheral with a finger tapping the wheel.

“No only a few teachers left through the back but other than that just Jeno.” you hummed.

“Jeno?” he whispered, grip tightening on the wheel slightly making you bite back a grin unconsciously. “Mhm, he even asked if I needed any help going to where I needed to go.” you sighed nonchalantly, his occasional glances turning into full head turns— waiting for you to continue.

“Did you tell him you were taking the bus?” His perplexed tone makes you giggle slightly as you continue to admire the colorful lights blending outside of the window. Sunghoon could feel himself breaking out in a cold sweat waiting for your response, with your head turned the other way he wasn’t sure what to think.

“Nope I told him I was going with you,” A smile broke across his face after realization hit him that you had no problem telling Jeno who you were with, and it was with him— silly he figured but it made his ego swell and cheeks heat.

“Hey eyes on the road sir.” You playfully reminded him, pushing a finger into his dimple softly causing him to clear his throat in embarrassment —coughing nonchalantly to hide his giddiness.

After pulling into the destination, Sunghoon held a hand out to grab as you confusingly looked at him and then the empty parking lot you were standing in.

“I was planning on taking you to a nice restaurant worth half of my paycheck but I figured you would’ve liked this a lot better.” he grinned cheekily, closing the trunk with a bag of take-out in one hand and alcohol in the other. Leading you up the stairs, your eyes widened slightly taking in the bright city skyline and busy traffic.

“It’s not the prettiest but I think it’s still pretty.” He sighed, straightening a small towel he took from the locker room on one of the cemented platforms for you to sit on.

“No Sunghoon it’s beautiful.” You whispered in a hush, leaning against the cemented edge with your elbows admiring the breeze from this high up, “Seriously.” you weren’t sure why but the view brought a content smile to your lips, after working nonstop for quite a while— you sometimes forget you step back and enjoy the moment. You learned to find the small and ordinary things beautiful, the lining car lights twinkling in the distance to the cicadas singing in the breeze.

Things will continue on in the world whether you comply to that idea or not, and it’s okay.

After perfecting his set up Sunghoon was glad you weren’t too picky about the setting, but you never were. Seeing you stare out to the view in fascination was a reason why he loved experiencing new things with you, not only was he getting to experience something new— but he was able to see you do as well. He loved it.

“Yeah— it really is beautiful.” He repeated, your head turning at his agreeance only to see his gaze on you. The tip of his nose slightly red from the cold while his eyes were filled with solace as he looked down at you.

Your heart was doing that thing again….

“Um, so did you decide on takeout? How’d you find the place?” You managed to let out, walking towards the small setup Sunghoon laid out as he rushed over to make sure the towel was still flat for you to sit on. “Y-yeah the boys said it was pretty good so I thought maybe we should try it.” He explained, motioning towards the pack of beer that you excitedly opened up.

“The boys did?” kids were trendy these days and that could mean one of two things— it was gonna be really good, or just really hyped up. Surprisingly it was pretty good, Sunghoon could be a picky eater from what you remember but he was fully enjoying himself—that could also be from the alcohol.

By now you were a few shots in, a couple of beer cans opened and a whole box of fried chicken finished. With the cold breeze brushing against your hot cheeks you couldn’t help but glance at Sunghoon from time to time secretly. His styled hair was now messed up slightly from the wind and his cheeks were slightly flushed from the alcohol.

“Sunghoon.” You softly called out, eyes slightly hazed from the can of beer you chugged down wondering if this was a good idea to talk unsober. His low hum sent shivers down your spine as you stared off in the distance towards the twinkling city lights.

Sunghoon was buzzed, he knew he needed to sober up soon to take you home but the thought of you next to him somehow made him anxious— leading to one too many shots.

Maybe it was the way you were picking at the empty can between your fingers, or the blank stare off in the distance; he couldn’t tell what you were thinking and it made him wonder. Your somehow sad expression when he found you after the game made him realize one thing, with this time apart he didn’t know how you’ve been at all.

Were you and your mom still on bad terms? You’ve confided to him one night after he found you crying to yourself when you thought he was asleep, despite how well and proud you presented yourself at school; you never felt good enough which broke his heart. You were sensitive, he knew that— a person who’d rather show off only your happy and good sides despite how polar opposite you might’ve felt.

“Do you regret it?” your small voice broke his thoughts, Sunghoon wasn’t sure if he heard right, the feeling of his heart suddenly dropping along with your solemn expression showed him you were speaking as yourself right now, not as the respective Ms.Kim, not YN from college but you right now in the moment.

“Regret what?”

With a shaky sigh, you shook your head trying to mask the slight tremor in your voice.

“I-I don’t know, everything?” You managed to let out, despite everything that happened, you had more good memories to grieve over than the bad—hardly any. Sunghoon was quiet for a while, and it made the thoughts in your mind run for miles wondering why.

Maybe he did regret it.

With your mouth gaping slightly the words ‘forget it-–it’s a stupid question’ were at the tip of your tongue. But a part of you knew it wasn’t stupid, it was just closure.

“You know sometimes I think about it.” He sighed, his voice low from the unexpected question.

“Just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean you weren’t one of the best things that happened to me Y/N.” you unknowingly let out a shaky sigh, of relief? Content? You were happy to confirm what Sunghoon felt wasn’t a silly fling you tried to convince yourself he saw you as.

Acceptance? With the words ‘we didn’t work out’ solidifying your long-time question of what happened, you were somehow at the same time struggling to accept that this was how things happened.

We just didn’t work out, despite for how bad you wanted things to— they didn’t.

“Me too—” it was the alcohol. Had to be the alcohol from the way your eyes found his, looking at you with a besotted gaze as warm as the feeling pitting inside.

“You were mine too.”

Unable to process what happened next, all you could feel was Sunghoon’s nose brushing against yours while your eyes fluttered on their own.

His fingertips brushing through your hair and against your jaw had you gasping slightly— had to be the alcohol. The feeling of warmth radiating off his lips had your heart ticking to death, lips so soft you could remember your first shared kiss with Sunghoon under your covers that one night.

His blazer that was on your lap was slipping as the feeling of his chest brushing against yours made you melt inside— it most definitely the alcohol.

“I regret it.” Your eyes immediately widened, freezing in place not understanding the meaning behind the sudden change in his answer.

“Fuck I regret it so much Y/N.” he pulled away, running a hand through his locks as your hand slowly falls down on your lap, heart beating loudly from the mix of liquor and your emotions.

“But you just said you didn’t…” you couldn’t help but notice your voice coming out softly from shock and fear— fear of your worst nightmare coming true. You didn’t realize but a small drop of sadness touched the palm of your hand, a tear. Sunghoon immediately cupped your cheeks whipping them away despite you telling him to let go.

“No Y/N I meant I regret not reaching out to you after that night at the stupid party— I fucked up.” Your brows furrowed slightly not understanding his confession.

“I accidentally ran into Naeun a while ago and she told me, everything.” he emphasized, bringing the blazer that was no longer near you back to your lap in a hurry.

“I was stupid, I was lost, and I ruined everything.” he softly told you, his eyes downcasted towards your hands with remnants of tears that you collected in the past minutes.

“Did you know her?” his questioning gaze led you to clarify the question further.

“Did you know the girl you left with that night?” You whispered, playing with your fingers while the wind blew through your hair across your tear-stained skin.

“What? No Y/N there was no girl… there was never another girl—ever.” He emphasized, turning to you quickly brushing your cheek with his thumb. “I just went outside to see if my friend left and went around the block a few times before talking to Jay…” he explained, hoping you remembered his college friends from that night that could vouch for him.

Glancing towards Sunghoon your brows furrowed slightly trying to connect the dots, with his soft gaze taking in your reaction you immediately turned to face him as well.

“And when I came back you were together with Kyungmin—” he cursed slightly his eyes looking into the distance with his brows pulled together. The name was unfamiliar, but you exactly who he was talking about.

“Sunghoon no— I” you denied, shaking your head expressing that you certainly weren’t together with Kyungmin.

“I know.” he muffled, taking your hand in his before pulling to sit close, the heat from his arm radiating off onto you slightly making it painfully obvious about how close he was to you. Chewing the inside of your cheek, the urge to tell him that you missed him fell at the tip of your tongue—much to your surprise he beat you to it. Bringing your enclasped hands together, a small peck was placed in the center of your dorsal palm, your skin burning with butterflies as a small smile made it’s way to your lips.

“I missed you so much.” He whispered, his eyes meeting yours filled with solace and sorrow— the moonlight perfectly highlighting the tip of his nose and the darkness of his pupils.

“I missed you too Hoon.” your small voice making him sigh into your palm almost in content.

“Missed you too much.” You added seeing his gaze travel across your face made your throat tighten— breathing hitched as the pink of his cheeks and the deep color of his lips became more visible with each passing second.

No matter what happened you realized after meeting Sunghoon again after all these years— you will always find your way back to eachother, back to the person who was meant to have your heart. That’s just how things worked for the both of you.

Two souls such as yourself don’t find eachother by accident or coincidence.

You could say goodbye to everyone else but not Sunghoon, never Sunghoon. Not when his brown eyes were gazing like you owned his world. His lips pecking your cheek softly as you felt your heart burst in love and jolity.

And that feeling of love and jolity continued with each moment of intimacy shared between you two after that night. The secret kisses under the blanket at your condo as he stays the night after only wanting to drop you off after work— to the secret kisses inbetween classes behind the printer in the faculty room and underneath your lab tables.

His slender pinky that would hook onto yours underneath the table during faculty meeting were your favorite, it was quit obvious by the smile ghosting on your lips absentmindedly while Sunghoon swung your intertwined pinkies across his lap. With the festival coming up soon, alot of these sweet moments were limited as the both of you not only had the ending semester work to complete but also responsibilities with the school festival.

But Sunghoon never failed to call you after work, whether you were preparing dinner or getting ready for bed; the chime of your ringtone always brought a smile to your tired expression.

“Ms.Kim where do you want us to place these chairs?” Twirling the pen between your fingers you motioned for your students to carry the stack of chairs towards the otherside of the court yard. With the festival happening later tonight there were still plenty of tasked to be done and last minute details to perfect before you could call it a day. When hours became one, you were basically running around campus like a crazed chicken to find the missing signs that were needed to complete your photobooth stand.

“Shoot where the hell did I place the signs.” you mumbled, swiftly going to your class that was filled with supplies and crafts done by the students. It was a festive time for the students, exams were over and the holidays were coming up; with the new year came new things to look forward to and the festival was the cherry on top.

“Ow!” You cursed, holding onto your knee that accidentally bumped one of the desk as you rushed to the missing signs that you were looking for.

“Y/N?” Your eyes instantly darted towards the door seeing an equally disheveled Sunghoon with a box of snacks by his foot, you figured he came up to the class to get supplies as well.

“Hoon!” you exclaimed softly, getting up from your position noting that despite looking disheveled— Sunghoon was still so handsome.

“That’s gonna leave a bruise.” he snickered, eyeing the size of your christmas sweater the two of you decided to secretly match with. The memory alone made him smile, the one you initially wanted was out of stock and the next option was two times the size of what you would usually buy. But you looked adorable; slightly flushed from running around, hair was pushed behind the backs of your ears by the headband you were wearing.

“My little reindeer is so cute.” he cheesed, poking your antlers as you looked up to him with a sparkling glimmer in your eyes. Feeling him pull you into his embrace, your arms immediately circled around his wasit, face buried into the wool of his santa sweater as you felt him kiss the top of your crown, whispering a small I missed you inbetween kisses that eventually landed around your face.

“Everyone did a pretty good job setting up for the festival.” You hummed, looking outside of the window at the twinkling colored lights from down below and the line of people waiting for the festival to begin.

“Well if it wasn’t for you always on our asses–”

“Sunghoon!” You exclaimed softly, pushing him away as he apologized with a chuckle—reaching to pull you back into his embrace. With your arms leaning against the window, you couldn’t help but smile in silence, silence that was no more filled with pain or acted like a void, it was silence of appreciation.

“This is kind of familiar don’t you think?” you heard him say beside you, his elbow slightly touching yours against the window as the two of you looked off into the courtyard, a small giggle leaving your lips as he made fun of Jeno for tripping over a few boxes from behind.

Looking up you realized what he meant from his comment as your smile softened at the warm twinkling bulb lights you decorated along the upper rim of your windows.

“Yeah instead this time Jake won’t interrupt us right?” You teased feeling him wrap an arm around your frame trapping you against the window. Leaning down he hummed a thought, his warm breath tickling the apples of your cheeks— the flashes of his friend interrupting his first kiss with you making him chuckle from the thought alone.

“I don’t know wanna try?” Slapping his chest lightly, you couldn’t help but look away shyly, bitting the bottom of your lip at how flustered he was able to make you. Using his free hand, Sunghoon brought your face to look at his again, his fingers tracing the lines of your features while his eyes took in every inch of your face. The two of you gazed at each other again in silence, not saying anything; but it was the kind of nothing that meant and told you all you needed to know once again.

Sunghoon had a place in your heart you knew was always going to be there.

“Ms.Kim WOAH–”

Niki.

Pushing Sunghoon away with all your might, you couldn’t help but apologize softly at his taken aback expression as his stumbled back against the lab tables. Clearing his throat as Jungwon and Niki both came rushing in with other students who seemed to have caught the two of you by the window.

“Y-you were looking for these right? I found them lets go!” grabbing the posters you couldn’t help but curse as the students began talking over you, understanding the situation a little more as Sunghoon smuggly grinned not denying any of the accusations, rubbing the nape of his neck as he took in your flustered expression.

“Okay okay, I hope everyone here can keep a secret right?” he announced gaining everyone’s attention. Small sounds of disbelief and annoyance echoed throughout the quiet classroom, some of them scoffing at the idea of keep this big of a secret while others were still in shock about their two favorite teachers caught almost kissing.

“If you do I’ll sneak everyone here a breakfast sandwhich for the first day of school after winter break.” he sighed in defeat, grinning in relief as everyone collectively cheered and agreed as one. You quickly told everyone to go down towards the courtyard, as the lines of people began to fill going towards different booths and activities.

“And make sure no one finds out! Actually you can tell Coach Lee I don’t really care.” Sunghoon stated, earning a few chuckles from the students and a glare from you. Shoving the posters towards Jungwon, his dimple came into view as his fond eyes traveled between the you and Sunghoon; a small ‘your secret is safe with me’ making you grin halfheartedly.

While the room grew quiet, you couldn’t help but snicker slightly as Niki came running back, passing Sunghoon a poster you assumed was a draft or one that was messed up before it was finished. The two of you stood there looking at each other knowing you were caught red handed by your students, gosh this was bad if the board found out. You couldn’t help but notice his grin brightening as you began to freak out at the fact you and Sunghoon almost made out in front of your own kids.

You were getting fired. Demoted at best, but most definitely fired. This would ruin all the plains you had lining up for your career— THIS was gonna ruin your reputation and—

“Y/N.” pausing mid rant you looked at him and couldn’t help the warmth that spread throughout your chest as your shoulders relaxed almost immediately.

Of course Niki gave him that one specifically. The cutout poster that had a mistletoe drawn just above his head, small hearts and snowflakes lining the borders with the words ‘I like you, from my head to my mistletoe’ written on the bottom. Your laugh echoing through the class as Sunghoon quickly embraced you placing kisses around your face.

In moments like this is when you realized you were grateful for Sunghoon in more ways than one. When you picture yourself being happy, there are many things that come to mind. Traveling the world to places that have always been on your bucketlist, learning how to cook michelin star dishes that you’ve had at restaurants, you wanted to raise a puppy on your own and even thought about going back to school to get your doctoral degree in science.

Those were all things you want to do, things you wanted to do with Sunghoon. You weren’t going to make him your sole reason of happiness that’s a little silly, but you smiled more when you were with him, and you realized he understood you more than anyone else has. He made your ordinary moments feel magical and was the kind of person who pushes you to be better, he was your best friend.

In between kisses and embraces Sunghoon never failed to let you know he loved you both in tone and in silence, and he never failed to show you a different side of living that was of course filled with love.

Because that was just who Sunghoon was, someone filled — With Love.

1K notes View Post

silcry

1 year ago

moth to a flame | psh.

pairings: park sunghoon x reader

synopsis: like a moth to a flame, you kept coming back to park sunghoon even though his flames can burn you.

wc: 3k

warnings: smut, mention of cheating. dni.

the continuous slapping of your skins are making a sound so erotic adding to the heat you are feeling with your bodies linked together. the bed squeaked while your hand gripped hardly over the sheets. your eyes shutting tightly because of too much pleasure that sunghoon is making you feel at the moment.

“stay fucking still, pretty.” sunghoon grunts.

"oh my-" you couldn't even finish your sentence as your body starts convulsing after reaching your second orgasm. your mouth slightly hanging open, doesn’t even give a fuck if there's drool coming out. mind too clouded over pleasure as he hit it from the back deliciously.

sunghoon groaned rutting his cock even deeper to your hole as he try to catch up on you. he smirks then bit his lower lip, canine showing then slap your butt once. the view of it jiggling as he hardly thrust turns him even more. he leaned down placing a wet kiss at your shoulder before turning you around, making you lay on your back this time.

your eyes met while you're both catching breaths and the view of him staring down at you, eyes filled with so much lust, just makes your hole twitch in anticipation.

you shake your head when he shamelessly licked his hand before starting to give slow strokes to his dick, aligning it to your entrance once again. hole so wet with your cum mixed together. it felt so dirty, but for some reasons, you like it. you like it so much.

"i c-can't anymore." you whined and hand stretches in attempt to push his hand away. it was no use because he easily shoved it away, eyeing you fiercely for trying to stop him from having his sweet pleasure.

“one more, baby." he says using his husky voice and easily slides in you again, hands gripping your hips so hard that his big veiny hands will surely leave prints.

the sensation of being filled by his thick cock makes your cunt excited, squeezing and suffocating it.

"just one more..." he mumbled, like as if trying to remind himself that you two needs a break too. he follows it with a low grunt as he started to thrust harder and faster again.

you moaned, starting to feel all your energy draining out of you. feeling too much from being overstimulated and exhaustion already kicking in. you two had been at it for hours already and sunghoon's stamina is just crazy. you could never get into his level, but there’s no way to tell him off because damn, does it feels so damn good. so damn good. nothing can ever beat this feeling.

his lips searches for yours and started kissing you messily. his hand gripping tightly over your jaw making you stay still as he devoured your lips. not giving you any chance to pull away, if you even plan on doing so. he bit your lower lip, making a moan errupt softly from it.

“ugh..” lips falls open giving him a clear entrance for his tongue. he didn’t waste any time and let his explores yours, tongues dancing with each other.

sunghoon's a good kisser, very good even. with the lips so perfect it would be such a waste not to put it in good use. your makeout sessions is always great.

but whenever he's so drunk with lust his kisses became so wet and dirty, just how you both love it.

"hmmp-" moan came out muffled because of his lips still attached to yours. a knott started to form in your stomach when he kept hitting the right spots, a sign for yet another delicious orgasm.

“r-right there, hoon! ughn,” you whimpers at the feeling of exploding inside you. “so deep, so deep. fuck.”

he slightly pulls away from your face to chuckle sexily near your ears, nibbling it. "i know baby. hold on," he whispers, and gave your cheek a sweet peck.

his thick brows draws near to each other as he focused to a stable pace that made it even more hard for you to contain your moans. you are starting to see stars from weariness and too much pleasure.

sunghoon just can't stop himself. if you look this hot under him how can he ever refrain himself from burying his cock to your cunt every damn time. you are just so perfect for him, just for him.

"f-fuck, you feel so tight around me... so fucking tight." he growled lowly, one of his hand reaches over your breast fondling it before giving it a suck.

"i'm so c-close, hoon." your grip to his arm tightens.

he gave your sensitive bud one more kiss before he raises his head to look at your face. seeing your face so aroused and so close from passing out just makes him lose his mind. you look so pretty.

"cum with me, baby." and with his command you released. he didn't stopped just yet and leans down to connect his lips with yours.

this time his kisses are slow and more affectionate as he continues to slide his cock in and out of you, painting your insides with his hot cum.

he fell beside you and you're both a panting mess after that. the room fell silent and eye lids are starting to feel heavy, but you are fighting it. this isn’t the right time to pass out here, inside his room. regardless of that thought, none of you said a thing or moved. just trying to go back to your senses after a very intimate and hard fuck.

a phone ringing brought you into your right head space. hearing that it was your ringtone, you pushed yourself up from his bed and searched for your phone in an instant. the space between your thighs hurts a little, but you give it no mind and focused on finding your damn phone.

"jay!" you cleared your throat as you try to sound normal. it felt strained from all the screaming and because of being choked in bed multiple times by sunghoon.

sunghoon sat up from laying down and you can see from your peripheral that he's watching you closely. it made you feel conscious and intimidated, specially now that you aren't fucking him and yet still fully naked. he was always the type of person who makes people feel conscious of themselves. maybe because of his godly visuals or basically everything about him.

you used your shoulder to hold your phone by your ears while gathering your scattered clothes, dressing up in a hurry.

"i just finished my shift, love. where are you? let's meet up and have late dinner." your boyfriend sounded so excited from the other line.

yes, it sounded that fucked up. jay is your boyfriend and you are in bed with someone else. you’re a terrible person.

a string of guilt came into you after hearing his sweet voice. "o-okay, sure! just pick me up at the store near my apartment."

sunghoon stood up and grabbed his sweatpants to wear it. his eyes never left you, he was just silently watching. fighting the urge to talk and ruin something precious for you. he stared with dead eyes, a bitter feeling poisining his whole system.

"alright, i love you too." and ended the call before starting to get your stuff.

he scoffed and put his hand inside his pocket.

"what do you think will my brother feel if he knew you were screaming my name moments before he called you?" he asks taunting.

your jaw clenched and hand hang from getting your coat. it was knife straight towards your chest. and just by thinking about that thought already makes you tremble in fear. you are very much guilty and you know what you've been doing is unforgivable. having him say that was like a slap on your face.

it was wrong to sleep with another men other than your boyfriend, and its even worst that he was his brother. you know this is bad. like fucked up very bad, and yet you just can’t stop yourself from going to sunghoon. you can’t stop falling for those stares and his hot touch. no matter how hard you try to stay away from him, you always go back.

like a moth to a flame, he was forbidden for you. because he’s trouble and he’s bad for you. but just like a moth, you didn’t care. you wanted his fire and so you are both burning, sinfully letting yourselves enjoy the flame you’re never should have shared.

slowly, you faced him and his placid expression was so far from how he looks at you in bed. there was no emotion or anything. just blank.

"hoon, please..." he clicked his tongue at the side of his cheeks before smirking. hearing you beg in bed is one thing, hearing you beg outside of it is another. both have clear effects on him, tho. its driving him out of his mind.

"we already talked about this. we agreed on just casual fucks—" your words hang when he took a step closer to you, making your bodies almost touch. the way your heart reacted with his action like he’s the ownder of it is just crazy.

“you know that's not the case anymore. we both know something else is going on here.”

you teared your gaze away from him, couldn't stand staring at his eyes. it always has its way on you. the way it stares at you just pushed into some kind of trance, like as if you are under his spell.

"i'm leaving." you mumbled and grabbed your bag, but was abruptly stopped when he took a hold of you.

"don't go." his tone almost made you give in, but you know it will just bury you two into the sin that already eating you both alive.

you licked your lips and slowly looked at him. sunghoon clenches his jaw as he stares at your teary eyes. its odd. he never felt this way before. countless girls cried in front of him, but not once did he felt like he wanted to protect them. like he wanted be submit and just lets them have what they want. just you. only you can make him feel like this.

“i l-love your brother...”

stabbed. you are stabbing him straight to his heart, but why are you the one hurting? why does your heart ache for sunghoon? it was illegal enough to sleep with him and it will be even horrible to have feelings for him.

“you do now, huh?” he taunts and tilts his head to the side. the corner of his lips lifts up, eyes not breaking eye contact.

“so what’s this?” he asks, “if you love him why do you keep coming back to me? craving more of me? is that what you call love?” a tear left your eyes when he said those words.

“ahh,” he sighs and acts as if he just put every pieces together. “you love him but the sex is just so boring that’s why you go to me everytime he cannot satisfy you.”

you shoved his hold off of you and shoot him glares. guilty. but you will never let him win like this. jay’s the perfect boyfriend. sweet, thoughtful, loving. everything you wish for a guy to be in a relationship with, he have it. but he seems so sweet and soft towards you that sex is not that thrilling. sunghoon was right. its a little boring. or maybe because you’re just into something else and so afraid to open it with him.

sunghoon’s the complete opposite of his brother. he’s arrogant, a notorious playboy, he’s the type of guy who just a go with the flow, mischievous and always full of himself. he fucks really hard and good too. it slowly became your addiction. the one time mistake was followed by another. and then another. and another. until you had lost count of them.

“what y/n? my sweet brother can’t satisfy you so you come running to me like a slut for my dick—”

“park sunghoon!” the fact that he’s saying all these things just makes you feel even bad. you know he’s a jerk, but it seems like his attitude became worst.

he scoffed with an unamused grin. “what? i’m just telling the truth.” he tilts his head over to the side, smirk growing wider to mask his real emotions.

“he’s so pathetic and boring to the point that he cannot even satisfy his own girlfriend.”

“enough!” you yelled at him.

“you can’t keep this forever.”

“that’s why i’m ending whatever this is right now.” you looked straight to his eyes.

“no you’re not.” his gaze burned at you, jaw clenches as he grabs your arm firmly.

sunghoon wanted to stop himself from saying or doing anything stupid. he isn’t someone who let his emotions control him. when it comes to this game, he’s an expert. he’s never the one to beg or stop someone from cutting whatever this is. he usually just shrugs it off then move to another one.

so why the fuck is he holding you so tight? why does his heart aches so much just by hearing those words from you?

he wanted to convince himself that its his pride and ego that you’re stepping into. that he just really hates losing to his brother. but he knew pretty well its his goddamn heart you are crushing and he’s letting you. sunghoon gave you his heart and doesn’t even care if you stab it until you are satisfied.

you can ruin him. you can ruin everything in him, if that’s how he gets to keep you.

“s-sunghoon,” you resist from his hold which is useless as he was like a stone. its funny how you think you can even break free from him.

he shook his head firmly, “you are not leaving me. no.”

your heart aches and it took everything in you to pull your walls up. the wall you built to barricade your heart to keep it from beating for him.

“i’m so sorry.” you whispered, lips shaking. the words processed inside your mind, but it was too hard for you to say it out loud.

you know it will hurt him and that will probably end whatever this is. it will hurt you as much as it will hurt sunghoon. but you know this is what’s right and you should’ve done that long time ago. before you two gets too attached.

“i love him.”

your words cracks his heart. no, he was already broken. and now that you made that choice, shatters it. his hold from you loosen and it took everything in you to leave him. this is your chance to make things right.

you’re not really yourself while you went back to your apartment to shower and freshen up a bit. sunghoon’s scent are stuck on you, like an alpha male claiming his omega. you shoved him away from your thoughts and just focused on getting ready.

“hi,” you greeted jay with a kiss on his lips after you arrive the restaurant.

he agreed on just waiting for you here since you informed him that you’ll take a while to get ready. this is one of your favorite place to eat and jay always gets you two a reservation whenever you plan to have a date.

“you look tired, love. everything okay?” his worried eyes carefully scan you and strings of guilt once again starts to suffocate you.

a small smile is all you can give him, “just tired from work.” you lied and eyes dropped at the menu placed in front of you.

“did you order already?” you ask trying to switch the topic.

he gently reach for your hand and placed a soft kiss on it, “not yet.” then smiles warmly. his eyes still look worried for you so you tried to assure him that you’re fine.

“let’s order then?” and was about to raise your hand, but he stopped you.

“let’s wait for a few minutes.” then he glanced at his phone.

your brows furrowed, “why?”

he lifts his head and innocent eyes stares right at you, “oh, sunghoon’s around town so he told me he wants to dine with us.”

you can feel your heart thumping hard and ears slowly muffling. shivers and cold sweats runs through your spine.

“w-what?”

he ignored the look on your face and doesn’t take it as a big deal. his eyes shifted towards the entrance and his eyes brightens at the sight of his own brother, walking inside.

“hoon!” he even raised his hand to catch his attention.

sunghoon smirks as he nods his head before starting walking towards your table. you didn’t move and just sat there, uncomfortably. he grins inwardly, watching how nervous you are.

“hi y/n.” he greets meaningfully before sitting at the chair across of you.

you cleared your throat and tries to smile at the man in front of you. just by the look on his face, it was visible that he’s enjoying this very much. he enjoys seeing you so tense.

“hi.” you shortly respond.

sunghoon chuckles before he looks at his brother to greet him with a wide grin.

“it’s good to see you man.” your boyfriend says, very delighted to have a meal with his brother after a long time.

“yeah. same here.”

“you said you want to tell me something?” jay brings up that got you stoned at your position. you hitch your breath as you glance at sunghoon.

jay’s arm rested at the back of your chair and his hand casually caress your arm. it caught sunghoon’s attention and his grin fell for a short period of time. he managed to pull it back and with a clenched teeth he tries to smile.

“later. first, let’s share a meal, shall we?” and he arches his brow sexily before glancing back at you, his words giving a double meaning.

tag-list:

@jeoncarla008 @hongshuaknow

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silcry

1 year ago

Nct x Mila will be the death of me

𝕾𝗖𝗔𝗡𝗗𝗔𝗟𝗦, 𝓗𝗘𝗔𝗗𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗘𝗦 ❳ 𑁍 𓄹 𝙴𝙽

概括 › 𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 ﹕─┈ A friendly clip of MiLA and NCT DREAM go viral for not-so platonic reasons — and the ENHYPEN boys are not-so thrilled about it.

﹟ 𝘄𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝘀 ፡ ፡ dating rumours, jealousy/possessiveness, not proofread, make out sessions between [ ˗ˏˋ ★ˎˊ˗ ] borders (you can skip if you feel uncomfortable)

✩ 𝗻𝗼𝗍𝖾𝗌 ᵕ̈ ིྀ ! 💍nonnie inspired me with this and this ask so shout out to you 😘 dont know how i feel about this chapter but wanted to post it in case anyone does enjoy it… might take it down later for editing but we’ll see how it goes 🤧

part i. | part ii.

MILA WAS NO STRANGER TO SCANDALS. She had been centre of a few since debut. There was the scandal about her supposedly bullying her members, the one about her apparently copying Kiara, and that one time people accused her mother of rigging the results of I-Land so that she could debut… No matter how hard she tried to be the model idol, things didn’t always work out. No one in the industry was safe.

One of Mila’s greatest accomplishments had been that she had yet to be involved in a dating scandal with another idol — a feat in this generation of Kpop, where netizens would speculate about romantic relationships between idols for simply exchanging eye contact for more than five seconds. And while she had the few ships here and there, nothing reached to a height as it did with, say, Karina and Heeseung.

But of course, there was a first time for everything.

“I’m getting ready to head off now, Oppa,” Mila called out. Pulling her satchel over body and picking another bag full of food off from the table, she prepared to leave the Enhypen dorms.

She was on her way to the SM Building for two reasons: the first was to have lunch with Aespa, and the second was to do with the bag of food she was carrying. The food in the bag that she was carrying was homemade Chinese cuisine she made for none other than her friends in NCT — Chenle and Renjun — who were part of the group’s China line, and whom she had asked to film a TikTok for ‘Sweet Venom’ together before she had lunch with the Aespa.

Mila got along well enough with the two of them at first. For a while, they weren’t really her friends as much as they were kind and gentle seniors. They looked out for her as elder artists and a shared kinship over their motherland; and she would greet them politely whenever they crossed paths at music shows or award ceremonies. Yet there wasn’t any sort of lasting bond between them.

It wasn’t until one day when Mila had offered to make some Chinese cuisine and drop it off for them — like she was doing today — and had unintentionally broken down the wall that was between them. All of a sudden, it was like she was pulled into their bubble and made one of their people. Like a baby bird taken under their wing.

“Are you sure you’re warm?” Jay asked.

Jay ran a hand through his tussled hair after giving Mila a gentle kiss on the forehead as a greeting. Since it was still early in the morning on a day off, the others were still asleep of groggy with sleep. And so, only Mila — who had to get ready and be presentable in time to leave — was fully awake.

Mila nodded. It tended to get chilly on the early hours of the morning, and Jay knew she was sensitive to colder weather. But Mila had opted to wear a warm turtleneck and a fluffy jacket over the top, so she didn’t need to worry. “Warm as a toastie.”

At that moment, Heeseung had stumbled out of his room, looking like he might topple over and fall asleep at any second now. He rubbed his eyes, pouting as he saw Mila standing in the kitchen with her bags, ready to go. “You’re leaving already?”

“Why did you get up? You should get some sleep,” Mila said.

“I wanted to see you off.” Heeseung wrapped his arms around her in a tight hug. He leant back and placed a chaste kiss to her cheek, a light smacking sound resonating as he parted. Patting her head, he smiled at her. “Have a good day, okay?”

Mila nodded with an eye-crinkling smile. “I will.”

Mila turned to Jay and wrapped her arms around his middle. “Say good morning to the others for me,” she said, as Jay stroked the top of her head and hummed in agreement. “Sorry I couldn’t help with breakfast this morning.”

Jay smiled softly. “No, it’s okay. You just have a good time out today. Don’t worry about anything else.” Jay held both her cheeks in his hand and pressed a soft kiss to her lips, sending a wave of butterflies off in her stomach. “I love you, Angel.”

“I love you more,” Mila replied instantly. She then reached out and tugged Heeseung closer so that she was hugging both Jay and him. “Love you both so much.”

Heeseung chuckled. “Love you too, baby.”

With that, the two elder members bid farewell to the girl as she skipped out of the door, before waving one last time, and following her manager to the car. Jay closed the door behind her as she left, and then the two went right back to sleep, to make the most out of this seemingly quiet day. Little did they know at the time about the buzz that would find its way to their quaint little dorm.

‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

MILA HAD A STRANGE relationship with SM Entertainment. Briefly, she remembered an encounter she had when she was at a dance competition back home in China, at the younger age of twelve. At the time, she met a beautiful woman there, who approached Mila’s mother and handed her a card with an all-too familiar logo. She claimed to be a scout from SM Entertainment, and said that Mila had the makings of an idol.

At the time, Mila had turned them down because of a lack of interest. And it wasn’t until later that Mila would learn that her dream was, in fact, to be the idol that scout saw her being.

When Mila thought about it, it seemed SM was the first to recognise her potential. And it was strange to think about the possibility of her debuting under SM in another world — especially when she had made so many friends there.

“Renjun-gē, I’m at the company now.” Mila shut the door of her van as she hopped out, her cellphone held up to her ear in one hand as the other carried the bag of food she prepared. From the other side of the line, there was a bunch of voices overlapping each other, causing Mila to tilt her head. “Are the others with you?”

While she had originally asked only Renjun and Chenle to do a TikTok with her, surprisingly enough their company suggested having the whole group film together with her — and her alone. Mila was confused but didn’t question it, seeing as Be:Lift gave permission for it. She didn’t know why, but she started to have an inkling that publicity through interactions was one of the reasons. Similar to the way Heeseung and Sunghoon had done a TikTok with Karina and Winter not too long ago.

However, Mila had yet to be on a familiar basis with the other NCT Dream members. Since they were in different generations — despite being close in age — and were her seniors in the industry by many years, they didn’t really have many reasons to become friends. But from what Renjun often said about them and what she saw of them in their content, they seemed like a fun group of people to be with. And Mila was nothing if not eager to form new connections.

“Yeah, we’re all in the practice room,” Renjun replied. He then suddenly told Mila to wait for a few seconds and yelled, “All of you be quiet! I can’t hear!” in Korean, before switching back to Chinese as he apologised to Mila. “Sorry. They’re being rowdy again.”

At that exact moment, Mila could hear Chenle’s distinctive voice yelling in the speaker, “Hi, Mila!” only to be followed by loud screams that reminded Mila of a distressed dolphin. Mila laughed. “It’s okay,” she told him while laughing, “Me and my manager are going to enter now. See you soon.”

With that, Mila entered the SM Building, and made her way to the practice room floors. And that was how Mila and her manager ended up at one of the dance practice rooms, filled with a rowdy bunch of males who didn’t realise she was there until she was almost hit in the face by a stray shoe.

Mila instinctively ducked and covered her head as the shoe hit the ceiling with a ‘thwack,’ before falling to the floor in front of her. Looking startled and confused, she uncovered her head looked up to see Lee Haechan in front of her with both hands over his mouth and wide eyes.

“Oh, sorry,” he said awkwardly.

At that moment someone in the background had stumbled out from the closet, which was originally being held closed by a startled-looking Na Jaemin. Mark Lee’s head was darting around everywhere as he struggled to find his balance.

“Where did my shoe—!” Mark stopped mid-sentence when Jeno cleared his throat, and the older male froze like a mannequin when he made eye contact with a sheepish Mila. “…Go…?”

Park Jisung scratched the back of his neck and awkwardly turned to Chenle, who was holding his stomach from laughing at the events that unfolded. Renjun face palmed in the background. Mila smiled hesitantly, before offering a polite bow.

“Hello, sunbaenims.”

‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

MILA WOULDN’T HAVE GUESSED from first impressions that NCT Dream were made up mostly of introverts. But somehow — as if abiding by the law of “opposites attract” — it had made things easier for Mila to get along with them, despite their initial awkwardness.

“Wah, this looks good!” Chenle said as finally looked inside the bag of dishes Mila prepared for them. (Once the Dream managers arrived at the practice room, a few minutes after Mila, they went straight into the professional business of today’s agenda, leaving little time for Mila and the Chinese boy to catch up. “Thanks a lot, Mila! You’re the best! The WayV hyungs will be so jealous.”

Mila shook her hands in denial and smiled as Chenle walked off to show off Mila’s gifts to Renjun. She smiled and turned to the three members standing with her: Jeno, Jaemin and Jisung.

Because there were so many people in the one TikTok, they would be doing several different groupings with Mila in a single take: starting with the maknae line (Chenle and Jisung), then Mila and the 00-line (Jeno, Jaemin, Renjun, and Haechan) and then her and Mark. There were bound to be some mistakes, so the TikTok didn’t end in just one attempt. But rather than feel annoyed, Mila quite enjoyed the chance she got to interact with the seniors.

“By the way, how old are you?” Jaemin asked suddenly. Mila hummed and lowered her drink bottle as she looked at the male, who reminded her somewhat of Sunghoon for reasons she couldn’t quite pin down. (Later she would realise it was because they were both handsome but very chaotic,l introverts, who seemed quiet at first, but were far from it.) “Is Jisung older than you?”

Mila nodded as she made eye contact with the youngest of the group. While it was true that he was older — and the same age as Enhypen’s 02z — Mila couldn’t help but see him in the same light as one might regard a baby chick. Something about him didn’t radiate the same air of maturity (or dare she say, sexiness?) that Jake, Jay and Sunghoon did.

“That’s right,” she replied, as if she herself had forgotten about that fact. “I’m a year younger. Born in 2003.”

“Wah.” Jisung had a shocked expression on his face, while his hyungs laughed at him. It was no secret that the once youngest idol to debut was awkward when meeting others younger than him. But this time in particular, he seemed even shyer than usual. “I can’t believe it…”

“Oh, so we’re all your oppas? You’re the youngest one here?” Jeno asked with a shocked expression. He had been maybe the easiest to get along with — not because the others were difficult, but simply for his smile, which reminded her of the warm eye-smile of Sunoo, and instantly made her feel comfortable. Mila smiled and nodded at his question. “What about in your group? Are you the maknae.”

“I’m the youngest girl, but there are three other members who are younger than me,” Mila explained. “Our maknae, Ni-Ki, was born in 2005. Our oldest, Heeseungie-oppa, is the same age as Chenle-oppa.”

“What about me?” As if on cue, Chenle walked into the frame. “Oh, by the way— I was just telling Renjun-hyung, and we think you’re the only ‘E’ type here.”

“Right!” Mila said, before clicking her fingers. “I was just thinking about how I heard from someone before that almost all of you are ‘I’.” She then gasped. “Wait, this is an important question: Are you guys ‘F’ or ‘T’?”

“I’m a ‘T’,” Jisung replied. Mila made an “oh” expression and nodded slowly, causing the others to laugh. Meanwhile, Jisung blinked in confusion. The first thing he thought of was Eunchae’s viral ‘Anti-T’ meme, and wondered if Mila was the same. “Why? Do you not like ‘T’?”

Mila shook her head vigorously. “No!” she denied vehemently. “I really like ‘T’!”

“Oh, that’s me.” Mark suddenly joined in with a raised his hand. He and the members of Dream — Haechan, Renjun, and Mark — walked over to join the smaller group after returning from their bathroom break. “I’m a ‘T’, too,” he clarified.

Mila turned and said, with an utmost serious expression, “Then I like you.”

Mark froze and opened his mouth. But no words came out, and he stood there like a gaping fish, unable to respond to Mila’s words — which suspiciously sounded like a confession, though they were anything but. It wasn’t that he felt she meant it in that way, or that he necessarily wished for her to, but that it was so sudden he was taken off guard. He couldn’t help but be flustered.

The other Dreamies laughed from around him, and his face turned a bright shade of pink. Coughing into his fist, Mark turned around to hide his blush.

Mila, on the other hand, paid no attention to it. She instantly made her way over to her manager when the older woman called her over to look at the last take they did of the TikTok. Slowly the others made their way over, and they all watched the footage on Mila’s manager’s phone.

“Wait,” Mila said as she squinted, “Do I really look like that?”

“Like what?” Haechan asked. “Do you mean the shape of your hair? Or your facial expression.”

Mila burst out laughing. “No, what I mean is— why does my face look a little puffy?” Mila squished her cheeks as she furrowed her eyebrows in concentration. “Or is it just me? Do I look like that?”

The boys loooed between the screen and Mila and shook their heads. Jaemin in particular — who was leaning down next to her — took a not-so discrete scan of her entire face, before smiling kindly at the girl. “No,” he reassured. “You look better in real life.”

Mila looked at him before laughing, half in shock and half because she didn’t know what a proper response was. For someone who received a lot of compliments, it was sure difficult to know how to respond to them. However, she was saved from the awkwardness as the others laughed along with her, creating a cheerful, friendly atmosphere.

Looking back, she might not have been as careless as she was if she knew what would happen later on. But she couldn’t have known that the entirety of their interactions together were caught on camera. Nor did she know they would be posted as Behind The Scenes shoots, for the rest of the world to see — and to speculate about.

‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

‘GOOD WORK TODAY.’

Mila smiled as she read the new message she received in her group chat with the NCT Dream members. Briefly, she considered the thought of introducing Kiara and the Dream members — and she smiled wickedly at the thought of giving the elder female’s boyfriend reason to be jealous. After all, Kiara was a big fan of Mark’s before she debuted…

Mila was cut off from her thoughts when she spotted Aespa heading towards her. After singing a quick ‘Thank you’ with an emoticon, Mila quickly shut off her phone and greeted the older girls with a smile and warm hugs. For the next few hours, Mila left her phone untouched and simple enjoyed the presence of the Aespa girls as they enjoyed their brunch and caught up on all the latest gossip.

Mila just didn’t realise she would be one of those topics.

“Oh—” NingNing paused mid-sip of her drink. She had pulled her phone out to bring up a TikTok to show Mila, only to be surprised by what she saw. NingNing turned to Mila with a surprised expression. “Mimi-yah, you and NCT Dream-sunbaenims are trending.”

Mila hummed calmly. She had expected this to happen after all. “I guess the TikTok got uploaded.”

Karina furrowed her eyebrows and leaned over, before her mouth parted in shock. “No, Mimi-yah… It’s not just the TikTok.”

Karina took the phone from NingNing, and held it up so Mila could see the screen. From either sides of her, Giselle and Winter leaned in closer to get a better look. Mila’s jaw dropped as she saw the one thing she didn’t expect to be uploaded — her interactions with the NCT Dream members. Specifically, the ones that were easy to twist and misunderstand.

“Then I like you, too.” Mila’s face in the clipped video on the TikTok NingNing found made her cringe at how easy it was to misinterpret out of context. That clip was then followed by the clip of Jaemina looking her up and down and telling her, “No. You look better in real life.”

Mila paled. It took a few seconds for adrenaline to kick in, and then all of a sudden, she was fumbling for her phone. The first thing she did was open her phone and check her group chat messages with the boys, and sighed heavily when she saw a bunch of spammed messages from them.

Mila was looking forward to this lunch for a long time. But as soon as Jay said ‘we need you,’ nothing else matter. She was halfway through reading the word ‘need’ before she was packing her bag and bidding farewell to Aespa, before sprinting her way to the lobby, where she had texted her manager to meet her.

The last thing Mila wanted was not to be there when her men needed her reassurance the most. She didn’t care if she had to drag her manager by the wrist like a scene in a Kdrama — all that mattered was getting back to them. (And preferably before Sunghoon got his hands on any of her plushies.)

‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

MILA WASN’T SURPRISED TO see Heeseung standing there at the car park, waiting for her. If she knew him well enough, she would say that he used his matthyung card to make the others stay inside while he quickly got some alone time with her before they inevitably started to bicker about the trending tag.

He had his arms crossed over his chest as he stood tall, stance wide. Mila quickly bid farewell to her manager — who decided to let Mila and Heeseung go off to the dorms alone — and ran up to Heeseung before throwing her arms around him in a tight hug.

“I’m sorry you had to see that, Oppa,” she said sincerely. “I didn’t mean for it to happen…”

Looking up at Heeseung, Mila frowned as she looked into his eyes, trying to find something. It wasn’t usual for him to be this quiet around her, so she worried that the clips got to him more than she expected. Now that she thought about it, he was unusually quiet on the group chat as well…

“Are you okay?”

Heeseung didn’t say anything, simply caressing her cheek, and then letting his hand fall to her wrist. “Let’s go,” he said softly. And without another word, he gently pulled her along behind him as he made his way to the elevator. She could feel the tension in his shoulders as if it were her own. And while she wasn’t intimidated by him in any way (he was Heeseung, after all), she couldn’t help but feel a little helpless seeing him this quiet.

As the elevator door opened, Heeseung placed a hand on her lower back, before gently ushering her in. He didn’t say a word to her, only pursing his lips as he nonchalantly pressed the button to the floor to their rooms. It was silent, save for the sound of the mechanisms of the lift in operation.

Mila bit her lip nervously. “Oppa—”

[ ˗ˏˋ ★ˎˊ˗ ]

Mila didn’t get a chance to finish before Heeseung had backed her up against the wall of the elevator, her lips colliding with hers. She gasped at the sudden contact, her fingers subconsciously reaching up to grasp his shoulders, while his arms came up to cage her in on both sides of her head. Yet, she didn’t feel trapped — only comforted by the closeness of his body to hers.

Yes, this was the Heeseung she came to know. The one who craved touch more than space; the one who would breathe in her kisses, even if it meant losing air. From the way his mouth fitted against hers — latching on like it was the bridge directly to her heart, mind and soul — to the way his hand reached up to cup her jaw, as if doing so meant holding the cusp of the world… All of it was so Heeseung, Mila didn’t know what to do without it.

He didn’t say a word, but she understood him anyway.

I love you, he said with his kisses. I’m yours, he admitted with a sigh. And you’re mine, screamed his touch.

She tugged on the strands of his hair, standing right up on her tip toes, and he hummed approvingly into her mouth, before pushing his body right up against hers. Her heart was erratic against his chest, and his grip was firm on her skin. Deep and passionate were his kisses, making her knees weak and her stomach flutter.

Then all too soon, it was over. He pulled away as if someone had been dragging him away by the collar. Hesitant. He sighed the moment his eyes met hers, before flickering down to her swollen lips. The flames in his dark orbs flickered out and he swiped a thumb against her bottom lip.

[ ˗ˏˋ ★ˎˊ˗ ]

“Sorry,” he said hoarsely. “I just… After I saw all that… I really needed you.”

“And you have me,” Mila said with a smile, reaching up to cup Heeseung’s face, before pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek. His eyes fluttered closed, melting instantly under her affectionate actions. “You always will. I’m right here.”

Heeseung smiled gently before turning to kiss the inside of her hand, just as the elevator door dinged. “I wanted to be selfish and steal you away for a little bit… But we should talk properly with the others.”

Mila laughed. “We definitely should.”

With that, the two walked into the dorms, hand in hand, where the others awaited them impatiently in the living room, as if they had a million things to say.

‿︵‿︵‿୨ ୧‿︵‿︵‿

“I’M HOME.”

Mila laughed helplessly as she was met with the sight of Riki side-eyeing her from where he sat on the couch, his expression set in stone. She bit back a smile at the endearing sight of him and the rest of her boyfriends sulking in the middle of the dorms.

“Did you have fun?” he asked deeply, his voice reverberating through the silent air of the living room. Unsurprisingly, there was a colourful range of reactions to the clips — but they all had the same undertone of envious green. “You and your friends were cute.”

Mila smiled and took off her shoes. Without a word, she walked over and sat beside the younger before hugging his arm, pulling his hand onto her lap. “You’re cuter.”

Riki huffed and turned away, but the way he laced his fingers through Mila’s was enough to tell her that she succeeded in lowering his guard. From beside Riki, Jake faced Mila with his enticing lips pulled into a frown. “Why are you only complimenting him? I’m a ‘T’, too.”

Mila smiled. She knew where he was going with the last statement, but letting him bait her anyway, to enable his sulking. If not to get it out of his system, then so she could spoil him later. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

“‘I really like ‘T’!” Sunoo imitated Mila’s voice, reciting her words from earlier. He then gasped dramatically and said, in the same high-pitched voice, “‘Oh, you’re ‘T’, too? Then I like you.’” Sunoo scoffed. “Seriously, why don’t you just confess your love to them while you’re at it.”

While he knew Mila’s words were taken out of context, he still felt slightly offended that she only mentioned liking ‘T’ types, when he himself was an ‘F’. So he thought he would give her minor grievance out of pettiness — though not in a way that would cause her to feel guilty.

Mila burst out laughing. She reached over and pulled Sunoo’s hand into her lap while he pouted, turning his head away in a similarly haughty manner to Riki. Mila smiled. “You know what I meant by that.”

“Still, there’s the, ‘You look better in real life,’” Jay said, a sneer on his face to show how strongly he felt while watching that particular scene. Sitting in his chair with his legs spread and his chin rested on his fist, he looked at Mila with an unreadable expression. “I don’t like the way he looked at you, Angel.”

“You were so pretty today, too,” Sunghoon added, his eyes trialing over her form head to toe. “And they got to compliment you and see you all dolled up before I did…”

Mila bit her lip. “Even if he looked at me in any way that wasn’t friendly, I wouldn’t care. I don’t really mind what others think about how I look,” she said. Then, with a slight blush, she added, “I mean— I’ve gotten used to be calling ‘pretty’… But I only get flustered when it’s from one of you.”

“Really?” Sunghoon was standing with his arms crossed against the wall, his biceps bulging against the material of his shirt in a way that momentarily stole Mila’s focus. He smirked slightly at the sight of her distracted gaze, before raising an eyebrow tauntingly. She pursed her lip as he regarded her with his intense gaze. “What else, Princess?”

Jungwon scoffed. “Can you not do foreplay in the middle of the living room? We’re right here, you know.”

“Whatever.” Jay threw his hands up in the air, before leaning back in his chair as if he were unbothered by everything around him. (He wasn’t.) “It’s not like you wanted for this to happen. All I know is that I’m not going anywhere near TikTok for the next month.“ Jay paused and then held up his arms towards Mila. “Come here. I want to hold my girl.”

Mila smiled. Riki and Sunoo, who were still giving her the silent treatment, let out little laughs of their own, their shoulders shaking as they tried their best not to break character. After giving last squeeze to both their hands, she kissed the both of them on the cheeks. Then Mila stood to walk over to Jay so she could comfort him — only to be pulled down into Jake’s lap as she passed by.

“There,” Jake said. “That’s much better.” He wrapped his arms around her waist, ignoring the glare from Jay. Jake then nuzzled his nose into Mila’s neck, humming contently as he inhaled the scent of her perfume. “Bet they didn’t get to hold you like this, huh?”

Mila shook her head vigorously. “Of course not.” She turned around and faced Jake with sincere eyes. “I don’t want to be held by anyone but you.”

Jake chuckled. “That’s right…” He closed his eyes as he placed a chaste kiss on her neck. When he spoke again, his voice came out muffled, as if he were drunk on her scent. “That’s our girl.”

Jungwon sighed from beside Jake. The young leader gave Jake an unimpressed glare. And though he whined, the same male relented and released his hold. Jungwon immediately pounced on the chance and pulled Mila towards him, nuzzling her the same way Jake did.

“It was so annoying,” he said. “People kept calling you guys cute together and everything… I wanted to hit them through the screen.” He frowned as he rested his chin on her shoulder, eyes lidded as they were trained on her lips. “You’re ours.”

Mila cooed as she cupped the younger’s cheek, pressing soft kisses to his dimple.

“That’s right,” she said. “I know it sucks, I get how it feels. But know that I’m not interested in anything anyone else has to say. You’re the only ones I want and ever will want. That hasn’t changed.”

She smiled as she looked around the room.

“The NCT Dream-sunbaenims will be good friends, but that’s all they are or will ever be. I’m younger than their maknae, who they treat as a baby — they probably see me as their younger sister, if anything. They’re far from falling in love with me. And as for me… Well, you know I love you.” She then recited one of her favourite quotes: “‘And if I loved you any less, I might be able to talk about it more.’”

There was a sweet pause on the sitting room, as the tension faded way. Heeseung smiled as he took a seat next to Jay, after having observed everything from the entry. It seemed Mila could take care of everything fine. Then again, that was to be expected.

“I’m really sorry that you had to see this go trending for that reason…” Mila frowned. “I didn’t know they would post those clips, considering how easy it would be for shippers to take it out of context.”

“No, don’t apologise,” Heeseung said softly. “We know it’s not your fault, and I still don’t know why the company let that be posted… But we love your smile, and how you make others smile too. Don’t lose that for anyone. Not even if you think it’s to protect our feelings.”

“If you’re ever scared about what we might think,” Jay added, “Then don’t be. Even if we get jealous, we just wanted you to be happy.”

“Hyung’s right,” Riki said with a smile, breaking his vow of silence against her. “I think it would be sadder if we saw you go viral for looking sad. I’d rather see you smiling, even if it’s not with us.”

Mila blinked, her chest feeling warm. She as just grateful that the boys didn’t blame her — but that they also didn’t expect her to change the way she interacted with other people for the sake of the public’s opinions. She giggled.

“Same goes for you,” she said. “Let me spoil you when you need it. Right now, just let me know what you need. This is about you and how you feel.”

“Well I still haven’t gotten to hold you,” Jay said, looking at Jungwon, who pretended not to hear him as he held onto Mila in a possessive grip, too busy placing chaste kisses on her neck to talk.

“And I still haven’t gotten my kiss.” Sunghoon pouted at Mila, and then suddenly turned to Jay. “Your plushie is going to be the first to go.”

Heeseung tried (in vain) to calm them down. “Okay, let’s leave the plushies out of this.”

Sunoo turned to Heeseung with suspicious eye. “By the way, Hyung, what did you talk about before you got back with Byeol? It was really unfair that you got to her first — I think we should cut down your cuddle time with her to make things even.”

“I dibs the extra hours!” Riki said, raising his hand.

“Why would you get them?” Jake asked incredulously. “No way in hell, man.”

Mila laughed. As she watched the the boys bicker, she started to plot mischievously about how to turn around the situation in their favour. She knew the company wouldn’t take any action against them, either, as long as there was a positive response from fans. So a little more ship moments wouldn’t hurt, right? What was a little teasing for fans?

(Just a few days later, NCT Dream and Mila’s interactions were blown out of the trending list by Mila and the boys’ most recent, incredibly cute, incredibly suspicious ship moments.)

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