When I Was A Kid My Favorite Game Was Stick War. If You Don't Know, Stick War Is When You And Your Friends

Isn't it soooo sick and fucking twisted that like...

Sj hated binghe a lot for being similar to himself and yet having all the things he craved the most (meaning a loving mother, starting cultivation at the right age etc), right?

But like. If he saw bingmei, wouldn't he lose his fucking mind??

The same kid, getting spoiled rotten by a version of himself that never faced any troubles, reaping only the benefits that someone else fought and literally died for???? That little beast, coddled into shamelessness and remaining just as feral after spending so many years on his Qing Jing Peak???? And despite how absolutely unbecoming it is, in the end it gets everything it wants: all the power, the world at its feet, and worst of all it gets his obsession reciprocated. The entitled impostor that took over sj's body loves that thing back and keeps giving in and in and in, giving it everything it wants.

And oh, if he ever noticed the parallels between what him and yqy went through vs. how the story unfolded for bingqiu..... Maybe he won't notice. After all, those pampered fools have nothing in common with him and yue qi. But if he ever were to notice how the same story beats repeat. The betrayal, the separation, the misunderstanding, the guilt, the reunion. If he were ever forced to see his body play yqy's role in his own story. Piloted by some clueless young master who never worked a day in his life, using all he has to over indulge some lost, snarling animal. And then get a happy ending. Crushing everything he ever stood for so decisively. Would he not prefer his original fate after all?

Maimed, humiliated, used as a play thing of a man-child god emperor for who knows how long. But in the end he never truly succumbed to him, did he? And yes, yqy's horrible, stupid death did crumble anything human that was left in him at that point. Still going against his wishes, always too late, never listening, same old same old. But perhaps at least in death he repaid his broken promise. Instead of wasting away, faced every day with a stranger he was supposed to know. And oh isn't it all the more horrible that sy got to finally hear yqy's explanation from his own mouth? Another mercy sj never got. Another thing stolen from him.

As horrible and violent as pidw is to sj. Svsss doesn't seem to be any kinder. We as readers get a better perspective on him and can finally understand him and his motives. But he would not want our pity. I know it in my bones that he would spit on our pity. If he wanted his story known, he could have explained and exposed himself at any point in the original storyline, but he did not want the world to pity him and to look down on him. He could have opened up his heart to other people, make some new friends, it shouldn't have been impossible. But he weighed his options and chose to keep his cards close to his chest. And even if that's very much the source of his tragedy, it was his choice to make. And it would be kind for any narrative he's taking part of to honour that choice.

Im afraid that despite it all, sj might just choose to stick to his original fate. Wronged and misunderstood, at least he went out on his own terms, without being perverted into something beyond recognition.

As much as he is willing to bite and scratch and kill and maim, no matter how much mud he drags himself through, i do think that there are some things that he is not willing to compromise on. I think even as a street rat, doing anything to survive, he still had a certain sense of integrity. Even in shamelessness, no matter how bad things got. And the older he became, the more he achieved, this sense only heightened. To the point where when sy takes over, he has a perfect hold on the mask of the lofty immortal, despite all the rumours. Seeing his hard work ripped from his so callously, appropriated casually and then used for the most inane purposes.....

Idk where im going with this but it does break my heart to think about how even in the new and improved version of the original plot, sj (and yqy for that matter) is treated as an acceptable sacrifice, never knowing peace, never getting closure. And we're supposed to just accept that and move on? As if his life doesn't shape the entire story?

In pidw, it was his cruelty that made binghe who he is. He's the main reason for the unification of the three realms under one rule. His petty, personal motivations indirectly shape the entire world. And in svsss, he is actually the titular scum villain. The main character wears him as a suit over the course of 4 books. He refers to himself as shen qingqiu exclusively throughout the novel. He may be dead for the entirety of svsss, but he haunts the narrative tenaciously. He is not one to be ignored.

More specifically, it is his suffering that shapes the world he's in. I think all mxtx novels have worlds that are explicitly unkind. And for svsss, sj is very much the embodiment of that pervasive cruelty. Both victim and abuser, the cycle of violence wearing human skin. Load bearing world building element, rather than chatacter. What am i saying. Take my phone away.

There should be a fic in which multiple different Binghes meet each other and they have all married Shen Yuan. Except Shen Yuan transmigrated into someone different in each and every one of their universes.

There would be the one in which he transmigrated into Shen Qingqiu, of course, but there would also be one in which he transmigrated into Yue Qingyuan and another where he transmigrated into Sha Hualing and so on. There should even be one in which he transmigrated into some random guy literally none of the other Binghes have heard of before.

The Binghes keep talking about the same person, except they're calling that person different things so none of them realise at first. And then they do and it's like "oh, we all married the same person, except that person has a different name and body".

And like obviously Shen Yuan would be slightly different depending on who he transmigrated into. Because of different circumstances and such. So occasionally a Binghe mentions something his transmigrated Shen Yuan did or said that would not and does not apply to any of the other transmigrated Shen Yuans.

Bonus if Bingge is there too, as the one Binghe there who has married many but none of them are a version of Shen Yuan.

Headcanon that Shen Yuan was hotter than Shen Qingqiu, actually.

Like yeah SQQ being a cultivator gave him a boost to enough attributes + being in a stallion novel where everyone is either unrealistic hot or dog's butt ugly got the Shen Qingqiu body extra points, and he wasn't bad looking to begin with. Plus not being ill is vastly more important to the new Shen Qingqiu than those extra hotness points (Without a Cure notwithstanding). But part of the reason why he's kind of like, meh, at least I'm not hideous or anything, is because Shen Yuan's original body was a knock out.

I also like him as chronically ill, and, as many people know, beauty standards and sustained suffering are not as incompatible as they should be. Shen Yuan was conventionally attractive in part because conventional beauty standards seem to want everyone slowly dying all the time. But even setting that aside, the man had flawless bone structure, an appealing figure, captivating eyes, and the kind of voice that stopped people in their tracks.

All of which was a contributing factor to his antisocial lifestyle, actually. Despite the fact that Shen Yuan does enjoy company and requires a certain baseline of social enrichment for his enclosure, his internalized homophobia and closeting did not play well with overtures from interested parties (regardless of gender). The only way to minimize the odds of him being asked out on dates was to essentially become a shut-in, especially since even Shen Yuan can only make so many excuses before he himself starts to notice that he's going to a lot of effort to avoid specifically that avenue of socialization. Far better to just remove himself from any risk of it, and then vocally lament that oh no he's just too much of a nerd to get anywhere with women!

Anyway this largely doesn't matter much outside of sheer comedy potential for any situation where SY gets his old body/life back. Like imagine a reveal scenario where the System is going to transport them back to their old lives.

Shang Qinghua: well bro I guess this is gonna be the ultimate test of love, right?

Shen Yuan: what do you mean?

Shang Qinghua: our husbands are gonna see what we looked like back before we were glorious cultivators! they're going to have to track us down in our mundane, kinda shitty pre-transmigration lives! it's gonna be at least a little embarrassing, right?

Shen Yuan: *gets his old body back*

Shang Qinghua, normal human with average looks: ...

Shen Yuan, exemplary 11/10: ?

Shang Qinghua: what. the fuck?? bro what the fuck why are you hot???

Shen Yuan: don't make it weird

Shang Qinghua: make it weird??? why were you sitting at home reading my shitty novel when you could have been out there building your own harem???

Shen Yuan: stop exaggerating

Shang Qinghua: oh my god you've always been like this. this is it, isn't it? it wasn't even brain damage from the transmigration or something--

Shen Yuan: hey

Shang Qinghua: --you've just always been completely unaware, haven't you? every time I wrote a beautiful woman who didn't know her own appeal you'd be jumping down my throat--

Shen Yuan: because that's a stupid trope--!

Shang Qinghua: --JUMPING DOWN MY THROAT EXACTLY LIKE THAT but this whole time THIS WHOLE TIME it wasn't even a glow-up issue, you've just been that, personified, yourself--

Shen Yuan: look I know I'm not ugly but I'm not I'm hardly that good-looking

Shang Qinghua: YOU ARE NEVER ALLOWED TO CRITICIZE THAT TROPE AGAIN! oh my god. how many broken hearts did you leave behind when you died?!

Shen Yuan: none, I wasn't even seeing anyone--

Shang Qinghua: yeah full offense but I am nottt taking your word for that. I bet you had a harem you didn't know about in this lifetime too. I bet you had a fan club, like an anime prince

Shen Yuan: *mumbling*

Shang Qinghua: what was that?

Shen Yuan: I said... only in high school...

Shang Qinghua: oh my god

Shen Yuan: it wasn't a big deal!

Shang Qinghua: *frantically trying to see if he can find any trace of it on the internet now*

I came up with this three-way table to help me (and now you, if you want) to rate things out of 5 stars. I was thinking of books and films when I made it, but you can probably use it for other stuff.

The idea is that you rate the thing on how much stuff you loved and how much stuff you hated, and those things weight against each other. There's only one way to get 5 stars or 1 star, so those should end up as the rarest ratings, wtih 3 stars being the most common.

'Spicy' means that the thing inspires emotion, whether positive or negative, while 'bland' means it doesn't affect you much either way.

An example of a 3-star (spicy) - for me personally - would be the Twilight series, because there's plenty of garbage in there but also some things that are like crack to me. I can't think of an example of a 3 star (bland) because by nature they don't stick in the mind.

(This also assumes giving 0 stars isn't allowed. That'd throw it out of whack...)

AU where, after dying in PIDW, Yue Qingyuan wakes up in the past when Luo Binghe is still just 14… and of course, he immediately goes to kill him.

Unfortunately, he still has his protagonist halo, so something interferes, and YQY ends up being confronted by the other peak lords about why he suddenly decided to try and murder a random Qing Jing disciple. Now, YQY can’t just say that he’s a demon, because he’s not sure what methods will work to reveal that, since he doesn’t know how LBH hid his his heritage the first time around — so he comes up with excuses, ones that he hopes will at least get LBH out of the sect before he becomes too powerful. He’s a poor cultivator, he always gets into fights, the other disciples always accuse him of stealing things and he doesn’t get along with them, so they should just throw him out of the sect —

What he forgets to account for is the fact that Shen Jiu is there, listening to all of this, and hearing YQY list off all the traits he sees LBH as sharing with his younger self as reasons he doesn’t belong at the sect. He knew YQY didn’t care that much about him, not after he’d abandoned him when they were children but… it still hurts to hear it spoken about so explicitly. If YQY didn’t owe him a debt for saving his life, would he be saying the same words about SJ?

So, SJ stands up to defend LBH. Sure, he might have been silently hoping the kid would quit or get himself killed, but SJ is nothing if not spiteful, and YQY? He just made things personal. LBH is his disciple, not YQY’s and by the time SJ is done with him, he’ll be fit to be his successor.

YQY is now faced with an impossible situation — use his authority as sect leader to go against SJs wishes and get rid of his future torturer… or wait and see what happens. Surely he’ll get bored of Luo Binghe eventually and start hating him again… right?

AU where, at some point after Bingge gets thrown into the Abyss, SJ decides he’s had enough of the murder accusations and having to listen to teenage attempts to play music and wrote poetry, and decides to fuck off. He tells YQY he’s going into ‘seclusion’ for his cultivation and proceeds to change his clothes, hairstyle, and wear something that covers his face as he starts travelling around as a wandering cultivator under his original name (if asked if he’s related to that Shen, he just tells the truth — he’s an orphan who never knew his family). This eliminates at least 60% of his stress and anxiety since he’s actually able to relax without worrying about insults or keeping his reputation as a cold and elegant immortal master intact.

Time goes on, and eventually Bingge comes back. Hearing that SQQ is away, he figures he’ll just use the time to focus on gathering power and collecting evidence before he can take his revenge. Along the way, he ends up in a small town, where he ends up going to a brothel because Xin Mo is being annoying and he left his wives at home. He steps in the door and — is that Shen Qingqiu???

SJ doesn’t recognise this handsome stranger who’s uncommonly polite to prostitutes. It’s been years since he saw LBH and he was an underfed teenager then, no taller than him. Even the name wouldn’t jog his memory since it’s not like he ever used the little beast’s name outside of the occasional bit of paperwork. So, he invites him over for tea and they talk.

LBH is immediately convinced that this cannot be SQQ because he’s actually being nice to him. He invited him to sit down and have tea! He’s asking for his opinion on the music! He’s smiling! LBH is pretty sure SQQ would rather drop dead than smile at anyone, let alone him! He goes into conspiracy mode: is this a long lost relative? amnesia?? an alternate universe counterpart??? possession????

SJ now has to deal with this strange cultivator following him around, always ‘coincidentally’ visiting the same towns he does and offering to help him on night hunts… because LBH is too curious about this not-Shen-Qingqiu to leave him alone. Eventually, SJ decides the best way to get rid of this stranger is to become disliked by him, something he’s got plenty of experience with. Of course, his entire life story (who’s going to connect it to the Qing Jing peak lord anyway? and it feels surprisingly good to actually tell someone) is the perfect choice.

This has the opposite of the intended effect, as now they’re bonding over their mutually awful childhoods. SJ complains about how at least LBH had a mother, LBH points out that maybe it’s better to never have someone than loose them, and SJ brings up Yue Qi. LBH says he was abandoned in the Demon Realm, because the Endless Abyss is a bit unrealistic for an ordinary cultivator to escape, SQQ points out that he would probably have preferred the Demon Realm to the sect he ended up in, and LBH has to agree. LBH talks about his shitty master and SJ can’t help but compare him to Qiu Jianluo.

Bingge is Bingge, so of course this ends up with them in bed together. In a moment of passion, LBH accidentally calls him Shizun… and SJ realises, and immediately goes into crisis.

While Shen Jiu would initially scoff at “would you still love me if I was a worm?” He would not so secretly love it if Yue Qingyuan said he would still love him if he was a worm and would not so subtly prod YQY for how he would take care of and cherish worm-Jiu

Shen Jiu would declare he absolutely would NOT love YQY if he was a worm because that’s DISGUSTING. but when frantically trying to find YQY after a weird qi deviation and stumbling upon an errant worm, he holds it very gently and says it will be okay and kisses its little head (?), which human man YQY who just stumbled out of the bushes finds soul meltingly adorable.

ive been thinking a lot about how shen yuan and shang qinghua have this friendship, right, and once they relaxed a little it'd be obvious at least to those close to them that they have a lot of shared history. but after a while, itd become clear that a lot of that shared history is dirty jokes, and the locations and properties of aphrodisiac/fuck-or-die plants, and that the names they call each other are dick puns, and that shen qingqiu voraciously reads shanh qinghua's erotica even if he heaps criticism on it.

and im just imagining binghe or their disciples or whomever slowly developing a picture of those two having a really wild and misspent youth together before becoming peak lords.

Trying my hand at this one:

Shen Yuan transmigrates into a worm.

It's just a normal garden variety (heh) earthworm, not a special magical worm (yet), so initially he thinks this is gonna be a really short transmigration adventure indeed. But of course that would be boring, so he also manages to end up in the body of a worm who lives under one of those magical immortal fruit-bearing trees.

One of the fruit drops, Worm Yuan chows down, and he significantly upgrades his physical abilities, and senses, and gains a cultivation boost! Hooray!

Unfortunately it's not enough to fix that he's still a worm, but it's enough so that he has less to fear from getting hit by a random shovel or such. In the process of eating the fruit, he sees some disciples (come to gather the fruits, slacking somewhat since they even allowed a few to hit the dirt) and overhears enough of a conversation to figure out that he's transmigrated into a worm that lives in the PIDW setting. Specifically, on Qian Cao Peak!

Wow! How random and wild! Why a worm??? What god did he piss off in his past life for this?

Well anyway, it is what it is, and Shen Yuan decides that if he's gonna live a probably short and uneventful life as a worm, at least he wants to see his favorite character. So he inches his way in what he hopes is the general direction of Qing Jing Peak, course-correcting whenever he gathers that he's guessed wrong, hitching a ride on the occasional shoe or once even gripping the internal part of a wheel from an An Ding Peak carriage, until finally, he's leveled up his meager worm cultivation even more and has reached Qing Jing Peak!

As Worm Yuan continues to inch his way across the peak, he keeps just-barely missing Luo Binghe, until finally he comes across... not Binghe, but a recognizable item: a fake jade pendant!

Though lost initially on a tree branch, it must have fallen at some point, down to the ground where Worm Yuan stumbled upon it.

Mustering his strength, Worm Yuan manages to get the broken string of the fake jade around his little worm body, and then makes the herculean trek to the wood shed. Dodging bird attacks, hiding from other QJP disciples, and further upgrading his Worm Skills such as digging, inching, and oozing, until finally he reaches his destination and squeezes under the door.

Leading to the situation of an incredulous disciple Luo Binghe -- who had previously been tending to his bruises -- watching as a little worm climbs into the shed (normal, usually it's spiders but sometimes other bugs get inside) while dragging his long-lost most treasured item in what can only be described as a deliberate fashion (very not normal).

After ascertaining that Worm Yuan is not some cultivator's tool or shapeshifted creature, Luo Binghe decides to approach this situation in the only reasonable way, and offers the worm some scraps from his leftovers. Worm Yuan happily shares a meal with his favorite character, and things take off from there.

Somehow Luo Binghe finds himself learning more about cultivation by watching Worm Yuan than he has in all his attempts to figure out his manual or listen to his shixiongs on Qing Jing Peak so far. He watches Worm Yuan work up the spiritual energy to crack rocks and scale the wood shed walls, and deduces some methods for applying his own spiritual energy in similar ways. He finds it heartening to think that if even a little worm can learn to cultivate through what seems to be pure determination, then surely Binghe can make his situation work, too. He scrounges around and manages to gather up enough materials for a makeshift terrarium, so Worm Yuan can be safe and cozy by his side at night.

Of course, trials and tribulations never stop. At some point Ming Fan and his cronies find the terrarium and smash it. Binghe is inconsolable until he realizes that Worm Yuan got away (extra durable, after all!) and is wriggling back towards him in a reassuring fashion.

Worm Yuan's hero schedule is quite full, too! At some point he digs his way into a tunnel to the Lingxi caves and saves Liu Qingge, and in the midst of the demon invasion he manages to help Binghe at a vital moment by hardening his body and tripping his opponent. He rides in Binghe's pocket when Binghe goes to claim Zheng Yang, too, developing his cultivation throughout it all.

Unfortunately, kind of, Worm Yuan is also in Luo Binghe's pocket when he gets thrown into the Endless Abyss. Through the hardships of the Abyss, Worm Yuan consumes some unsavory things (the less said about the quality of worm food in the Abyss, the better) but manages to unlock rare worm cultivation upgrades, until finally he achieves his first transformation -- a gigantic Dune-esque mega worm!

The less said about the symbolism of a stallion protagonist accompanied constantly by a literal monster worm, the better, probably. But having the ability to tunnel through basically anything does make a lot of things easier, at least in terms of travel, and cuts years off of the Abyss trip. Binghe and Worm Yuan almost have fun, even, just tearing through the terrain and any foes stupid enough to get in Worm Yuan's path until they retrieve Xin Mo and bust out.

Then they get into the demon realms and that actually is just straight up mostly a good time. Worms like Shen Yuan are not common so at first he nearly always surprises Binghe's foes when he shows up to help with fights, and a lot of the time the demons involved don't even seem to realize, at first, that he's with Luo Binghe and isn't just some hellish calamity that's coincidentally also shown up! But word gets around pretty quick that the new Heavenly Demon on the scene has a giant worm companion (probably leading to some misconceptions of people who think it's Tianlang Jun returned and that someone's mistaken Zhuzhi Lang's snake form for a worm).

Once that happens, unfortunately, some demons start taking precautions. After the first time Worm Yuan gets poisoned and nearly perishes (saved by Binghe's blood in the nick of time), Luo Binghe stops letting him participate in fights. Which is just rude! Worm Yuan's not going to make the same mistake twice, duh! But Binghe just keeps holding him in reserve again and again until the fight with Mobei Jun, and then when Worm Yuan intervenes anyway (is it just him or does Mobei Jun seem to know a lot more about potential heavenly demon weaknesses than he did in PIDW...?) and gets partly frozen, Binghe goes berserk. For a while there Shen Yuan is worried he won't actually LET Mobei Jun surrender!

Thankfully though he does, and then Binghe settles into his properties and starts... building a giant-scale worm garden? What about the harem, Binghe? Like obviously it's nice and all, but shouldn't you be focused on housing for, y'know, your future wives?

Other factions in the demon realms clearly are wondering about the same thing, as the marriage alliance offers naturally start pouring in. The most vocal of these being Sha Hualing. Worm Yuan supposed that his Binghe is probably waiting to officially take his wives so that he can marry Ning Yingying first or something, but still, a little planning wouldn't go amiss. Though eventually Luo Binghe seems to get -- if anything -- fed up enough with the questions about his marriage prospects that he does start setting up for a wedding.

Worm Yuan is surprised and touched when he finds himself being fitted for a monster-worm sized amount of wedding regalia. So he can be included in Binghe's wedding procession? That's so sweet! He's not sure he understands the inclusion of a veil, though...?

Anyway. Yes. Binghe marries the worm.

AU where Shen Yuan was originally an AI. Not a futuristic sci-fi self-aware one either, one of our current fancy auto-complete word generators, trained on internet comments and sent out by someone with too much time and money to mess with people. When the building the servers holding the neural network are in floods, the AI ‘dies’ — only for a System, only looking at the comments to try and find a replacement for a villain it didn’t expect to die so early, to grab it and stuff it into a human brain. This takes some time to get used to.