I Care (or Do I?)

seeing percy struggle in the live action with constant thoughts of that there’s something wrong with him, that he’s broken, because things never go his way JUST HIT SO HARD. esp as that’s how my life has been continuously and i think that is such a big deal for me. and it may be the percy adhd thing but. it just kicked me in the guts.

My guilt will not purify me.

(Batgirl 2000 permanently altered my brain chemistry)

thinking about cass & dick and being able to clock each other instantly.. or not being able to clock each other and freaking out. always the perceiver never the perceived. thinking about how they're two sides of the same coin, so close yet too far apart to meet, turning and turning yet never on the same plane. thinking about how they don't agree on much but they'll always agree on the belief in the world they're trying to protect, in the salvation they seek from penance, in the absolute precision of every movement, from the flick of a wrist to a twitch of their toes. they have two hands attached to their arms, one to carry sin and one to carry sacrifice, and they head out into the world in hopes of preserving the very thing that saved them. the thread of life ties them together and they offer to the world themselves, holy and whole.

oh my god. barbara literally named cass. she named cass after cassandra from greek mythology. and she named herself after the oracle of delphi. barbara basically named cass after herself!!

because the difference between cass and babs is that no one listens to cass. at first she didn’t even know how to tell anyone, and when she finally did know her mouth wouldn’t work anyway. and when she does learn to speak no one listens. she tries to tell bruce that she is happy being batgirl but bruce fires her anyway because barbara told bruce that cass isn’t.

barbara thinks she knows what cass needs, and she does, but she doesn’t know how to go through with it so the way it ends up happening only hurts cass more. both bruce and babs project onto cass so hard, trying to give cass what they needed when they were young and cassandra doesn’t have the insight or information or words to tell them what would help her. cass thought it herself- “batman just wants another weapon in his war against crime and oracle’s looking for someone to live out her own shattered dreams” (batgirl 2000 #46)

cassandra hadn’t met her own mother yet and didn’t even know what a mother-daughter relationship would look like, had never seen a mother interacting with a child expect for maybe briefly on the street or on tv. but still, she recognized barbara as a motherly figure. barbara is the one she comes to when she cries, the one who protects her and advocates for her, brings her on vacations, who takes care of her, barbara is the one who named her. barbara is the one who cass left a note to before planning to die.

Bruce & Minhkhoa By HO

tamino and mitski photographed by ramy moharam fouad

YOU relate to matt murdock because you have religious trauma. I relate to matt murdock because i have always had an intense feeling of shame for existing, have always felt like there was something wrong with my fundamental being, continuously disappoint my friends and family but cant seem to stop, have an extreme violent anger within me that i hate, and feel like i always need to be better. we are not the same

sorry i’m late i slithered here from eden just to hide outside your door

this is what it means to be human

Everything, Mary Oliver

The Breathing, Denise Levertov

A Prayer by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

The Laughing Heart by Charles Bukowski

Like a Small Café, That’s Love by Mahmoud Darwish (translated by Mohammad Shaheen)

Having a Coke with You by Frank O’Hara

Eating Together by Li-Young Lee

The Orange by Wendy Cope

The Quiet Machine, Ada Limón

To Go Mad, Paruyr Sevak

Our Beautiful Life When It’s Filled with Shrieks by Christopher Citro

Hammond B3 Organ Cistern, Gabrielle Calvocoressi

Peace XVIII, Khalil Gibran

Your Unripe Love, Paruyr Sevak (from “Anthology of Armenian poetry")

Here and Now by Peter Balakian

Ich finde dich (I find you) by Rainer Maria Rilke

The Thing Is by Ellen Bass

One Art by Elizabeth Bishop

Miss you. Would like to take a walk with you. by Gabrielle Calvocoressi

I Want to Write Something So Simply by Mary Oliver

What's Not to Love by Brendan Constantine

Where does such tenderness come from? by Marina Tsvetaeva

You Are Tired (I Think) by E. E. Cummings

Living With the News by W.S.Merwin

What the Living Do by Marie Howe

i am so hungry right now that i could stab a roman emperor and eat a salad made out of his remains