I Couldn’t Fix Him. But I Could Fuck Him

I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldn’t see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like “uh...hi?” And she said “I made you, do you know that?” And I nodded and she was like “I hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please don’t break my heart”. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Mean™️????

Three butch friends of mine finishing the basement of my first house around 1996.   They worked for beer, and not even anything fancy. 

quick reminder that my own lesbian-nonbinary-ass genuinely supports the hell outta each and every one of you. regardless if i know you or not, im happy to be living in this shithole of a life in the same world with you.

and im proud of you, i know in my heart just how beautiful, amazing, talented, smart, and worthy you are and i hope you can see that too🏳️‍🌈🌈

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED

YOU KNOW THE HAIKU BOT???

OFC YOU DO

YOU KNOW THAT MESSAGE HE PUTS AT THE END OF EVERY POST????

"Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up."

YEAH???????

WELL THATS A HAIKU TOO

Beep boop! I look for

accidental haiku posts.

Sometimes I mess up.

NOW YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME THATS NOT THE CUTEST THNIG YOUVE EVER HEARD

Come at me bro

@the-ones-who-fall

The Showgirls posters have to be the most hilariously terrible designs I’ve seen in my life, yet I have never been able to find a single explication on what was the marketing team thinking.

Not an interview, not people commenting it, nothing, the Leg Worm Head Woman was just accepted and left like that and it haunts me

Sorry I haven’t posted much this week, I have been enjoying my towns film festival, so for now enjoy this ready to fight boy 💚💚💚 posting should go back to normal next week!

bringing this to the tumblr crowd. please read the whole post before voting

Some additional info from the comments:

- noone's recording. If any of the car salesmen try they're instantly disemboweled

- the billionaire expects six minutes of cuddling (with the bear) after you're done

- if you and the bear both cum at the same time your earnings are doubled

- bear is 24 years old