Now we must teach them commerce

Did you guys know that the most recent version of sharks have fins that are kinda leg like and they like to walk up onto land?

okay you know those virtual science labs they made you do in high school?

i bet they’d have mad science versions at evil high school

Once in my dreams when I was sick with covid I died slowly and painfully in real time in my bed. I suffocated to death because my asthma and the congestion made it more and more difficult to breathe, and my limbs were too heavy to move. I cried out for help, but I didn’t have enough breath. The memories of that dream remain and haunt me to this day. I’ve had very few deaths in my dreams that felt so real. Sometimes I wonder if I really did die then, and the rest of this life is some odd dream or some bizarre quantum immortality situation.

died and came back tired. died and came back exhausted. died and came back with manic energy. died and came back with malingering unease. died and came back twitchy. so many possibilities

I need you all to help me kill a guy who said skibidi toilet is the most impactful piece of anti-imperialist western literature ever written

I AM UNEMPLOYABLE

Every time I reblog something important I feel like a little messenger boy running with news to the town printing press

(link to original)

my personal idea of hell is an eternity of sheltered 26 year old queers showing me 2018 tweets which call random things genders and waiting for me to laugh.

Well now we have ozone layer subliminal message snail rainbows that make you think you’re a snail so hard you turn yourself into one

I think one of the biggest reasons I enjoy jjba is because I envy this level of confidence and sincerity in storytelling. See, I would not have just said something as fucking stupid as "bullet-deflecting oil." I would've come up with some kind of Watsonian bullshit magic-science explanation that at least squared with the logic of the story instead of just saying "Oh, it's an oil that deflects bullets" and moving on to the next thing. But that is not because I am a better storyteller, no, quite the opposite. It's because I'm a coward.