The Thing About Ace Attorney Is That When It's Bad It's So So Stupid But When It's Good It Genuinely

Hansry modern AU where Hans is a "tabloid darling" (aka PR nightmare) and Henry is just some small town dude who happens to be his friend until one night after some bar hopping the paparazzi get a photo of them doing something that could be construed as romantic at the right angle (but really wasn't), and Henry and Hans make the front page of a gossip magazine as the new "it" couple.

my mom just had a 7cm brain tumor removed and since she's woken up she's been talking nonstop about this dream she had about going to an art gallery full of colourful paintings by a 'homosexual artist' named klimsdorf who was ethereal and wise, both young and old... at first she was convinced he was a real person but after failing to find him online she's accepted he was a figment of her subconscious mind and is now determined to bring him to life via painting his portrait herself. she's 67 and has never drawn in her life. and now this. blorbo from her tumor

Can we normalize this?

Like please please please??

I stole my little cousin lcd panel

dear people with OCD: the next time you have spiraling & intrusive thoughts, what-ifs, or catastrophizing scenarios, I am sending a cardigan-wearing 46-year old NYU professor directly into your brain and he says "Aaaaand scene!!!" and he claps his hands slowly. and he says "Wow. Wow. Powerful stuff. Evocative imagery. A little bit post-modern, a little bit hysterical realism in the vein of Don Delilo but let's pause right here." and you will recognize your thoughts as a perplexing avant-garde film shown to an audience of 15 liberal arts students who are now trying to get a good grade and sleep with their professor.

vintage phone

the unfortunate thing is that i fear kcd2 has ruined game romances for me forever, including its own minor/sideline romances. like no thanks champ. no i will not do your stupid fucking playersexual kissing side quest. you mean nothing to me. i'm sorry, you want me to give you your Special Item to unlock your backstory? why. who are you to me. are you my one reprieve from the tragedy of my old life and the polestar of my new one? do you pettily piss me off or childishly delight me so much i have remembered how to have a normal day again? are we now so thoroughly burned into the woodwork of each other's lives that we would rather perish than imagine returning to a life without the other? have you grown into your manhood and your understanding of a person's worth with me??? no you have not! i will not be pressing x to fuck!

phoenix what the fuck is your issue

he's been thinking of this line for a week let's cut him some slack. it's hard being the snarky straight man of the entire franchise when you are so definitively not a straight man.

autism is not a horrible disease that ruins lives and tears apart families. elon musk, who is autistic and an evil billionaire who doesn't pay taxes, has ruined thousands of lives, and whose family hates him, is a statistical outlier adn should not have been counted