Lessons In Survival & Innocence Lost

Sam didn't know how to apologize

I have always sustained, and keep saying, that Sam is not and has never been abusive, or a walking red flag, or any of the things some people like to call her. She acted like a d*ck and messed up a lot, but I can't point out any time where she was being an asshole where you can tell her intention was to be hurtful. Sam was clearly not socially well adjusted, her grandma didn't let her be herself, her sister told her to pretend, and her friends just went with it. So in many instances she didn't know how to react to things or what to do.

As the episodes progress we can see her getting better at it, and in my opinion nowhere it is most obvious that in her apologies.

The first time that she messes up with Mon, she tries to make amends by just bringing her food, no words and no other actions.

Mon, being the self respecting person she is, is obviously is having none of that. After that fails, it's Kirk who ends up apologizing for her and bringing Mon for dinner.

The next time she needs to make amends it's with Jim. Initially she suggests to Mon that she's going to call her the next day, and this time is Mon herself that gently steers her in the right direction. She tells her that she needs to apologize in person, which she does.

When she goes to Jim, she starts by giving her snacks, which seems to be the only thing she knows what to do. And then, she tries doing the exact same thing Mon did with her.

Sam obviously tries to learn a lot about what to do in social situations from TV, so she ends up apologizing to Jim in a "Lakhorn" way.

Later in the episode, when Mon is mad at her and she doesn't know what to do, she googles it and the first answer is "sincerely apologize".

Sam discards this and tries a social media dance instead. When it doesn't work she tries apologizing and is actually surprised that it works.

So the next time, after some puppy play, she does exactly that.

After her outburst at the end of episode 8, she needs to apologize, hard. So she takes what she has learnt. She didn't call, and instead she went to Mon in person, and waited for her to give her the chance.

And then, again after some play, she sincerely apologized.

Honestly, the Khun Sam from episode 1 and the one from episode 12 are like completely different people. But I don't think anything showcases more her evolution than this. She is constantly trying to do better, even when she still messes up.

“When a child’s primary caregiver delivers both praise and brutality, it is a virtual coin toss as to which will attach itself to the child’s identity. Terribly unhealthy families damage children in many ways, but one of the saddest is the destruction of the child’s belief that he has purpose and value. Without that belief, it is difficult to succeed, difficult to take risks. Perhaps more to the point, it may seem foolish to take risks, “knowing,” as such people do, that they are not up to the task.The way circus elephants are trained demonstrates this dynamic well: When young, they are attached by heavy chains to large stakes driven into the ground. They pull and yank and strain and struggle, but the chain is too strong, the stake too rooted. One day they give up, having learned that they cannot pull free, and from that day forward they can be “chained” with a slender rope. When this enormous animal feels any resistance, though it has the strength to pull the whole circus tent over, it stops trying. Because it believes it cannot, it cannot.“You’ll never amount to anything”; “You can’t sing”; “You’re not smart enough”; “Without money, you’re nothing”; “Who’d want you?”; “You’re just a loser”; “You should have more realistic goals”; “You’re the reason our marriage broke up”; “Without you kids I’d have had a chance”; “You’re worthless”–this opera is being sung in homes all over America right now, the stakes driven into the ground, the heavy chains attached, the children reaching the point they believe they cannot pull free. And at that point, they cannot.”

— Gavin de Becker, The Gift of Fear

What symptoms of depression actually look like

Increased irritability and/or anger when you don’t know why

Feeling numb or having muted emotions in response to upsetting or exciting situations

Lack of interest or passion, in general, for things you once loved

Inability to concentrate or stay focused

Change in sleep patterns, be it not getting enough sleep, having trouble falling asleep, or sleeping far too much and not feeling rested

Exhaustion overall, even for “no reason”

Missing deadlines for projects or assignments

Withdrawing from social activities

Feeling guilty for missing deadlines or withdrawing from social activities

Needing “the rest” because you’re so exhausted, but feeling worse because you stay in bed or on the couch most of the day

No motivation to actually get up and do basic tasks

Hating yourself for not responding to your friends or to important emails on time, but not being able to force yourself to do it

A passing desire to die or just not exist, but not being full-blown suicidal

Not an exhaustive list by any means. What other ways does depression manifest?

Do you know what's an extreme sport? Trying to get as many things done before my depression comes back

👁️ ✨

RAMADAN KAREEM TO ALL MY DEAR MUSLIM FOLLOWERS!

If someone gives you everything, don’t you dare throw it all away like it’s nothing. If you do not want it, then give it back but don’t you ever take something that does not belong to you and ruin it. Don’t pull flowers out of their beds just for the hell of it.

Ming D. Liu (via mingdliu)

As a parent, you don’t get privacy until you are on your own. My house, my rules, my money, my decision.

Don’t like it?

Too bad.

I am the parent here. I’m not your friend. I’m your father.