"omg Those Are The Exy Monsters They're So Scary"

Just once, I need Neil to get angry at Andrew for being so careless with his life. Just once, I need Neil to make Andrew understand that the terror Andrew felt that night in Baltimore, when Neil walked willingly into death's cold embrace without telling a soul what was waiting for him, or at the championship game, when Riko's racquet came within inches of crushing Neil's skull-

That's the very same terror Neil feels when Andrew walks a little too close to the edge of the roof. It's the same terror Neil feels when Andrew speeds a little too fast in the Mas, when he weaves between cars like he's got a death wish. Its the same terror Neil feels when, after Aaron's trial, Andrew drinks a little too much and disappears for a little too long, and he doesn't leave a note and he won't answer Neil's calls, but he took the car and nobody knows where he is until he miraculously turns up at Wymack's at nearly five in the morning.

I need Andrew to realize that as terrified as he is of losing Neil, Neil is just as terrified of losing him.

I fucking- I can't find it right now, but whichever one of you motherfuckers said Andrew's 'lack of control' was actually just intentionally calculated releases of pressure, that he was always in control when he lashed out because he lashed out in very specific and measured degrees - every single 'too far' was always 'just enough', its just no one else saw the raging volcanic inferno brewing just beneath the floorboards cus they were too distracted by how ear piercing the sound of the tea kettle going off was-

You're so sexy and I love you, but I wanna respond to you in spirit cus I can't find your post babes

We love 'biblically accurate' and 'devil's sacrament' as religious phrases yea? Well, my favorite (aside from 'heated fellowship', a black christian euphemism for fucking nasty) happens to be to 'know' or more specifically to 'know biblically', another word/phrase for fucking someone nasty.

stay with me this is going somewhere i promise pack a bag if you must

The interpretation I was raised with was that sexual intimacy was so vulnerable and exposing of one's most inner authenticity (that which apparently only God had such access to) that sex could make someone Know and See you the way Christ did (yadda yadda, "only fuck other Christians cus they'll be saved and sanctified enough to honor that blessing", yadda yadda) ANYWAY

THE POINT IS

You ever have someone in your life who just,,, saw you? Like, they could take one look at you and just Intuit Through The Vibes that something was up? Like they could just feel your energy and knew what to do or say or whatever? The kind of person who could walk into a room where you're minding your own business, doing something mundane, and they take one cursory scan of your posture and immediately ask "What's wrong?" like,,, what??? why do you ask??? what do you mean 'you can tell', I'm not fucking doing anything???

The kind of being seen for who you are that just leaves you feeling kinda exposed and tender? The kind of thing that leaves you bereft and yearning if you've never experienced it before (or had but lost it) because it feels like everyone only likes different mirages of you?

Andrew and Neil are so Relationship Of All Time because they seemed to See and Know each other like that even before they started locking lips on rooftops.

When Neil said "I want to see you lose control", i'm imagining Andrew probably felt so naked and flayed because everyone assumed he was perpetually losing his grip. On his anger, on his sanity, on reality, on his control. But like,,, Op's Spirit Of Post Long Lost, you were so fucking right. Every bit of Andrew's behavior was carefully calculated and intentionally released packages of what was his True Inner Turbulence that he would never dare release out into the open because that's not a target he's willing to give anyone a chance at aiming for.

Out of control? Andrew hasn't been that since he was probably a tween.

But Neil had never been fooled. From cigarettes and airport pickups to cigarettes and rooftop altercations, not once had he fallen for the mirage.

Without ever having needed to touch him in that way, Neil Knew Andrew. Biblically.

And that's why Andrew simply had to engage him in heated fellowship.

Whenever Jeremy does anything for Jean in TSC I’m reminded of the fact that it was Andrew who most likely did it for Kevin, in his own fucked up Andrew Way (TM).

Andrew followed Kevin’s schedule to keep the partner rule.

Andrew took him shopping for new clothes.

Andrew took him to sweeties full of awfully unhealthy food.

When Kevin wakes up at night, in a haze and he looks for the other bed in the room, it’s Andrew he finds.

When he’s afraid, when he panics, when shit hits the fan and he needs help, it’s Andrew he looks for, and Andrew is right fucking there.

They’ve spent the past year in each others pocket, in a way that the drowning hold on to a raft.

They’re complicated and ugly towards each other. They’re cruel and sharp and vicious, and they hit each other where it hurts, but nobody can ever tell me that the two of them are not best fucking friends.

I will never recover from the fact that if Neil and Andrew got married, Andrew picks Kevin as his best man, Kevin says yes.

(The Raven King, ch.14)

This one line lives in my head rent-free. Neil may be antagonistic, but he never hated Aaron. He wanted him to be happy from the beginning.

what did you expect, captain?

i absolutely love Renee because this the sweetest person and i can't stop thinking about that this sweetness it is her personal choice like she really want to be that good and she actually is. the way she supports Jean is insane to me.

“You’ve endured the storm long enough. Don’t you think you’re overdue for some rainbows?”

“What you hold onto is less important than the act of holding on itself. It’s so easy to get lost in ourselves and this world. Sometimes you need to find your way back one tiny miracle at a time.”

“I have enough faith for us both" 

“I’m so proud of you for making it this far. I’m excited to see how far you can go from here when you can finally spread your wings without fear. Fly safe, Jean. We will see you on the court in finals.”

It’s Aaron who accidentally outs andreil as married

Him and Katelyn had started to make videos, answering medical questions and explaining procedures to help people better understand their health and the heath system. (They also talk about old outdated practices from history just for fun).

They had grown quite popular, and in one video, as Katelyn is being brilliant and explaining some topic or the other, Aaron is sitting beside her, listening intently and nodding along.

And then he takes a sip from his favourite mug. The one that says ‘Okay-est Brother-in-Law’ and has the most unflattering photo of Neil Josten on it.

The line ‘He’s not allowed to fight his addiction.’ changed my perception of Andrew Minyard forever

Sometimes I lie awake at night thinking about how in the shower scene, Andrew took off his armbands. He wasn’t scared of getting them wet or anything; he was literally wearing the rest of his clothes, but he knew that he was seeing Neil’s scars so he let Neil see his

NEW ANDRIEL COMIC PAGE! ✨

I just read a incredible fanfic this days that makes me feel so cozy and warm omg I almost wished to die (jk haha) hope u enjoy