A Demon Simply Called The Brother. It Doesn't Have Siblings Or Any Family, And It's Ambiguous Whether

my hobbies include: shaking the can of soda i just finished to hear the two (2) drops of liquid slosh around and then debate if im going to make a Fool of myself. i repeat a few more times before i inevitably indulge in the Bufoonery of trying to get the last two drops of soda

Guy whose wife comes out to him as a lesbian and he just sighs and starts googling ‘estrogen near me’

rip Bunny Corcoran, you would have loved chatgpt

thinking abt that time i played sufjan stevens driving with my mom and after awhile she just goes “so his brother had a daughter huh”

"A ship can never truly love an anchor." dude shut up. a ship without an anchor gets dashed against the rocks. it's useless, completely at the whim of the currents. a ship loves an anchor so much it carries it everywhere it goes. the anchor gives the ship the world to love. dude.

I'm at the pediatrician office watching two 3-year olds attempt to break the language barrier.

in an ideal world i would have 8 beverages with me at all times and i would just be able to pull them out of my pocket like an animal crossing character

brought a poem to the gun fight

"Why doesn't daleton buy pants that fit him"

It was established in season 2 that he has the smallest, sluttiest waist in the whole kingdom

— Susan Sontag, from “Death Kit,” (1967) (via lunamonchtuna)