My @aftgsecretsnowflake For @szecretary Sorry It’s Not Very Christmassy 😔

i can’t believe some of y’all read this line and decided to be normal about it

i love going about my day and acting like I don’t think about it every waking moment

why is Richard sickly for like 95% of the book he's always complaining about being exhausted and faint and nauseous and riddled with headaches and his solution is LETS HAVE MORE PILLS AND ALCOHOL??

LIKE SIR PLEASE JUST EAT A VEGETABLE IM BEGGING U

funniest thing I've seen all day

Keema:

now i haven't finished the dream thieves yet (i'm like,,, 7 chapters away from finishing) and i think this may contain spoilers???? but i'm not too sure yet. i'm basically gonna word vomit. i'm sorry for not using any quotes, i wish i could but i only have the ebook version and a very limited storage space on my phone where i can only have ~two books downloaded

like a normal person, i enjoy listening to video essays, see what creators want to explain to their audience and leave with a certain view, try to come to my own arguments about certain points in the videos, see if i can apply some points to other aspects of my life etc etc. (this was the type of shi that helped me with my eng lit essays rip i miss alevels) and like a normal british citizen i looked up stuff about classism in the uk. in the end, i found a video essay about classism in general and how the ultra rich try to mimic being poor to get away from their hard issues that comes with being rich (which, frankly, is probably a lot less compared to someone who is working class).

recently, i was talking to my friend about specifics in the book about certain characters and i remember we went onto the convo of making music playlists for the characters. they said "it's gonna be hard for adam [...] cuz his whole thing is about being unknowable" and it always struck me with how unknowable he truly is when reading his character because his character is intrinsically linked to his working class background. (context: i'm a middle class child of immigrants who built themselves in the uk)

it's very clear the kind of social commentary stiefvater wanted to make using adam's character with how isolating and alienating it can be coming from a working class background trying to assimilate yourself into a society of those protected and privileged enough to not have any problems with accessing opportunities. how class is a huge obstacle between interpersonal relationships and feeling safe enough to be vulnerable with your issues with being working class. how difference in class can cause one-sided shame because of the meritocratic society we're living in. how, no matter how much money you earn or how many connections you can make, your attachment to your working class identity can be enough reason to aim for something supernaturally larger than yourself.

it's evident that other characters overlook adam's social class because he's a "self-made man" (or smth) and mainly because he's their friend: adam. however, when we get a chapter in his pov, class is a driving factor in how he interacts and views everyone. we can see the privilege gansey and ronan have for being able to not even consider class as an intimidating aspect about themselves to a normal person, but it's everything to adam in the sense that he feels like his earned money doesn't give him access to a similar respect.

now that i truly think about it, it was a good idea for adam not to join them in monmouth manufacturing because it just feels like they're... mocking him in an indirect way? they have the ability to choose to live in a nice place and instead chose to live in a random, run-down building because it seemed aesthetic. adam was forced to live in a rundown trailer because that's all they could have afforded. i know gansey had good intentions for wanting adam to join them, but everything that he likes as an aesthetic (monmouth manufacturing, the run-down camaro, eating mint leaves instead of gum) can seem like he's flaunting the fact he can choose that lifestyle without any consequences.

back to the point of the meritocratic society (which we usually assume in books that take place in a similar world as our own) creating shame because of their class: the assumption that because someone has worked hard to earn what they have gives them a right to be proud. but this is the opposite for adam as he fights with the fact that he could have maybe be seen as even more equal to gansey if he had just been born with wealth.

we can frame it as, maybe, despite gansey's desire to appear working class, it only broadens the distance between him and adam. it only worsens adam's difficult relationship with his class shame despite probably wanting to be more relatable or even laid-back.

when reading the second book after his sacrifice, i was confused as to why adam was so un-adam-like. i mean, in the first book i didn't really understand him because of his huge insistance that his class makes him inherently inferior to everyone he surrounds himself with and i don't see class as an issue myself.

however, his sacrifice basically was watering the seed of ambition that was planted when he decided to aim for aglionby. it becamse clearer to me how much this opportunity to be superior, even if it's supernatural and terrifying, is important for him understanding in what he thinks he lacks. by those thoughts of what he lacks, he thought that this chance to be cabeswater's channel could be a way to compensate for his inferior social class. or something.

anyways, thank you for coming to my ted talk. this is not proofread, and my sister keeps nagging at me to shower. also i simp for gansey do not think this is me trying mischaracterising him i'm just trying to understand the theme of class in this series and having gansey as a figure to compare to is literally integral.

Andrew either has nobody saved in his phone ("hold up 0273837263 is calling") or the most ridiculous ones and nobody knows

Andrew's phone contacts:

Exystential crisis (original)

Exystential crisis (deluxe)

Spare parts

Joan of Exy

Captain

Neil's bf

Parental unit

Barbie

🐝

Stickball addiction enabler

rip Neil Josten u would've loved reversible jeans and Duolingo

headcanon that andrew is great with kids. they absolutely love him and no one fucking knows why. the first time the foxes notice is at aaron and katelyn’s housewarming party, when their two year old toddler walks up to andrew on shaky legs, clings to the material of his pants and goes, “uncle andrew!” and the foxes (minus neil) all hold their breath when andrew bends down and picks them up like it’s all he does every day, with a blank face. and no one can pretend that the kid just confused andrew and aaron, because they follow andrew around for the rest of the day, literally glued to his shoes and fascinated by everything he does, screaming “uncle andrew!”

and everyone is like ‘okay, so maybe it’s a one time thing and because andrew looks like the kid’s father’, until the same thing happens with erik and nicky’s adopted kid and later with kevin and thea’s daughter

rip bunny you would've loved asking the freshman "where my hug at"

Idk why but Gansey seems like the kinda guy to go fishing

thinking about evervale raising a toast to immortality and being remembered forever, and tristancallum toasting to the fragility of mortality and the inevitable descent into chaos and dust, and the greek class raising their glasses — camilla saying, “to live,” though she never truly got to, and bunny adding, “to live forever,” though in the end, he didn’t, and neil perry talking about acting, "i could live dozens of great lives. to be or not to be. that is the question! for the first time in my life, i feel completely alive," and then committing s*icide after performing in his first ever play...