Ads - Blog Posts
WTF???? THIS AD SAYS CHOOSE A GENDER THEN IT SHOWS AN ALIEN OR BABY YODA IM FUCKKKKK KAJSKSKSNDJDJKD
I saw a Grammarly ad today and got inspired lol
pov: one, two Grammarly is coming for you
You hear Grammarly in the distance, their long nails scraping across the walls of the hall. You're trying hard not to hyperventilate. Hand flies over your mouth in horror when your childhood lamp falls, then shatters. The lamp was made by your late-great grandmother in 1939. She was a film writer with a side hobby of making pottery. You look at the ceiling, Sorry, Grandma, you inwardly apologize to yourself, and everyone you've ever wronged too. This is what it feels like when your life flashes before your eyes. The scraping stops, you inhale sharply. This is it, this is how I die, is the only thing you find yourself thinking. A soft knock follows shortly after the scraping stops, You imagine their tall pale head snapping towards your door, fingers clawing at it. Surprisingly there is no clawing, just a gentle knock. You check to make sure the door is locked, firmly. You whip out your phone, then put it away again. No use in calling the police now, it's already over for you. You know your family is next. A soft hum can be heard from outside your bedroom, then a loud slam. You peer out from your hiding place. A long, white hand with lengthy nails has broken through your door. There is a hole in the door, right above the silver handle. You retract your body back immediately, but you know it's no use. They will get you eventually. You are eternally doomed. As you expected, they sniff you out. The last thing you see is that haunting pale hand. The last thing you smell is fear. The last thing you touch is the fine brown carpet of your childhood bedroom. The last thing you taste is your bloody lip, which you damaged earlier in the frantic escape. You will never escape again. The last thing you hear is this quiet, almost angelic serenade, "Writing isn't easy. That's why Grammarly can help. This sentence is grammatically correct, but it's wordy, and hard to read. It undermines the writer's message and the word choice is bland. Grammarly's cutting edge technology helps you craft compelling, understandable writing that makes an impact on your reader. Much better. Are you ready to give it a try...?"
Ah yes, they look so relaxed! I love the natural growing, blue, plastic chairs in the outdoors! . . . Why is the kid chilling on the floor?
Off topic a bit.
I found an ad and I think I thought into it too much.
WHO IS STEVEN?
WHY IS HE CALLING ON WEDNESDAY THE 28th AT 10:10?
IS THIS A SIGN FROM THE COMPANY?
WHY IS EVERYTHING SO SPECIFIC????!!!!!!!
What the actual fuck is up with all the conservative advertisements on Tumblr?
No other social media has ever shown me ads that were further than what I want or even expect to see on my feeds.
I don't give a FUCK about maga hats or tailgate festival. Like where am I? Do they know who uses this platform?
Computer Meltdown
The Computer Says NO!
Borrowing someone's tiny laptop, so all my new posts have been delayed. In the meantime I am posting these retro Ads to amuse myself until am back up and running.
Can't remember where I found the pictures but will update when I find the credits.
*slams the reblog button*
Hey @staff @support
You need to let us report ads.
This ad is promoting a diet plan that would starve a five year old.
These are actively dangerous, and I know you know that because I remember the crackdown on pro-ana blogs.
The average fatphobic ads with the muscled anthro characters are *annoying* but this is a structured plan with specific instructions on how to starve yourself.
If it violates your ToS for users, you shouldn't allow it in ads.
One thing that I think Facebook and YouTube do better than Tumblr is giving people the ability to opt out of specific ads.
Especially being able to tell them that the reason you don't want to see that ad is because it's not relevant to you.
I don't mind a reasonable number of ads in exchange for a free service, but the ones here on Tumblr are so horrifically misaimed and there's no way to tell them that.
I legitimately thought the app was glitching or some shit. 😭😭😭 Forgot the second part of the season is coming out in July.
