Angstttt - Blog Posts

GAZ ANGST TIMEE! For my gaz lovers since we are STARVED of this man.

~♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆~

As the last moments together ticked closer and closer to an end, Gaz continued to try and maintain his calm exterior. "Don't wait for me, okay? Promise me."

A long pause fell upon them, and Gaz's soft eyes looked into your, pleading with them in a silent way. "Be happy."

All you could do was look down at the floor it didn't feel real. The love of your life was going on a mission that he won't be coming back from.

He stared at you waiting for anything he didn't want his final moments with you to be pure silence. He needed to hear your voice. "love please I need you to promise me you'll be happy yeah?". He raised your chin with his hand to look you in the eyes.

"I don't know if I'll ever be happy in a life without you" you said tears in your eyes. "Don't cry, please," he begged, his throat aching as he fought back the urge to break down completely at this moment in front of you. "You have to be. For both of our sakes."

He tried to steady his voice, to sound brave and strong, for your sake, but failed. There was nothing he could do to hide his sadness and pain at the thought of leaving you alone and never coming back.

"You’ll find love again," he whispered, "I promise you. I always believed it would be us but sometimes destiny has other plans. I just don’t want you to stop believing in love. Remember that.”

He smiled at you, wiping your tears away with his thumb, hoping he could erase every ounce of sadness he saw in her eyes right now with just his touch.

"It's not fair" you said quietly "I know, sweetheart. I know." He wanted to tell you so much more. That despite the pain he felt in this moment, the only thing that mattered was making sure you were happy. That he was going to miss you forever. That he’d always love you and wish he could be with you every day.

So instead he just pulled you into a long, tight hug, never wanting to let go again. You had taken a step back and tried your hardest not to cry as you talked "I- um I wanted to give you this photo as my gift to you" you gave him a photo of yall first date with each other.

Gaz's heart warmed instantly when he saw what you were holding. It was a photo from your first date, when everything began. Just looking at it, he could picture their entire life together stretching out before him.

For a brief moment, he forgot everything else and he was back in that moment for real. His eyes filled with tears, but he smiled through the pain and took the photo from you. With a final glance at it, he squeezed it tightly in his hand. The world around Gaz slowed. Reality came to a screeching halt as the truth set in. This was it. You're final goodbye.

Gaz took your hands, pulling close. His eyes scanned her expression, searching for any sign that this wasn't really happening. *He wasn't ready to say goodbye.*

His heart raced, his vision blurred as you smiled at him when you looked at him as if he hung the stars. He smiled back at you. Gaz knew it was time to let her go. His mind began to settle, as he took a deep breath. "I'll carry those memories in my heart...forever."

Time had nearly run out, and both of them were aware of it. Gaz refused to let go, his hands grazing your face and caressing your hair once more. Their lips met in a final kiss that took the last few seconds off the clock. "I love you..." you had said voice breaking.

"I love you more..." He had always said that to you. Never once did he win the "I love you more than you love me" contest. He was fine with losing every time though. He couldn't resist the temptation of saying it again and again.

"I'll always think of you" you said tears flooding you're eyes. "I'll think of you too," Gaz answered, his words being cut-off by the sound of his watch beeping.

The time was up. Tears continued to stream down Gaz's face as he watched you take a step back. He didn't want to let go, not like this. If he could take just one more second of their time together, he'd take it in a heartbeat.

But, it wouldn't last a second longer...

"It's time," he said softly as he squeezed your hand one last time, "It's time to go."

The two shared one final moment. Gaz knew it was the last time they would ever see each other. He gently pressed his forehead against yours, letting the warmth from your body engulf him.

"I'll miss you," you whispered. "I'll miss you too." He whispered back.

With a final kiss on the cheek, Gaz turned away, taking in one last view of your face before he was gone for good. And as he stepped out the door, a single tear rolled down his cheek.