Batman - Blog Posts
Batfam quotes as things my family has said
Okay, so this one is long. Legit this happened yesterday.
*whole family is going out for dinner*
Tim: *locks the door before leaving the manor* okay, everyone ready to go? I'm starving.
Bruce: Alfred, did you get the house key?
Alfred: ... no master Bruce. You grabbed the car keys, I assumed you grabbed the house keys.
Bruce: oh... well... oops?
Jason: You, Bruce Wayne, Batman, "world's greatest detective", have locked yourself out of your own manor.
Bruce: ...
Jason: *wheeze*
Damian: Drake, look what you did. Not only did you lock us out of the manor, but you have humiliated father!
Tim: wtf, how is this MY fault!?
Damian: tt useless.
Tim:... you little-
Dick: whoa! Let's all calm down! We're all a little hangry and not thinking straight.
Steph: yo, I didn't get my phone. It's in the kitchen.
...
Bruce: *sigh* let me get a sledgehammer.
Alfred: master Bruce, there must be a less destructive way to enter the manor.
Bruce: Alfred, I've spent millions of dollars on our security system. This is the least destructive method.
*leaves to get the sledgehammer*
*a couple minutes later.*
Bruce: how... how did you?
*Cass standing next to the open door*
Cass: credit card!
Jason: million dollar security system my ass.
Part 2 of Batfam Nerf War
Scroll down for part 1. It's not far.
Previously: Tim then builds a team...
The "Tim team" consists of Steph, Duke (reluctantly), and Cass.
It starts out with the four of them ambushing Jason as random times. At one point, Jason has to restrain himself from pulling a real gun on Steph. She has her guns loaded with glitter as a "artistic addition".
Jason eventually loses it and recruits the "big guns". He promises Dick a hug and cashes out a favor from Damian.
The group spends about a week ambushing each other (Tim usually concocted unusually complicated traps). Until Dick's gun malfunctions and accidentally fires on Damian. The teams split into three, the four....
By next week the manor becomes the battle ground of a no-holds free-for-all nerf war.
God help poor Alfred.
Imagine nerf darts, glitter, and batarangs scattered all around the mansion. Alfred just following behind and cleaning up the "bat tornado aftermath".
Somehow, Bruce is completely oblivious to the destruction his children are causing. "It just a harmless game Alfred". Bruce is lucky Alfred loves him.
I'll write part 3 when I'm motivated.
*GASP*
I found the webtoon...
Best day I've had since I discovered they have a legit Ramen shop at the mall.
Everything about this webtoon is amazing.
Go read it.
No, really.
Do it.
Download Webtoon and find the Batman comic, it's not hard to miss.
Don't we all love some chaotic siblings shenanigans at the gala?
Ah! The annual Wayne gala...
Every year, Bruce Wayne attempts to throw a normal gala.
You, know. The kind every other billionaire throws.
But somehow
Somehow
Something weird happens.
Whether Damian lets Batcow into the ballroom, or Steph sets off the sprinkler system, or (God forbid) Jason mixes laxatives into the cake; something always goes wrong.
And. It. Is. Always. His. Kids'. Fault.
It's become a running joke in the media!
"The Wayne Kids at it again!!! Read their latest gala antics below!"
Bruce just wants to jump into that bottomless pit in the Batcave...
Why WHY are his... lovely children like this? Can't they just give him some peace.
Of course not, Dick is sitting on the chandelier and everyone is staring.
Dick waves at him.
He can only stare blankly until Tim comes over and hands him a cup of coffee, Tim holding one himself.
Not really a typical gala drink, but he deserves it. Takes a big drink and almost spits it out. He give Tim and incredulous look.
The coffee is spiked.
He can't tell if it has monster, whisky, or a fucking 5 hour energy in it though.
Tim just shrugs and takes the cup back.
"More for me"
Cass walks over and gives him a pity pat on the shoulder.
God help him.
He loves these kids.
But God help him...
Okay, but like...
Jason Todd coaching a little league team called the Outlaws.
And trying to keep it from literally everyone he knows.
Because he adores these kids, but he knows he'd catch hell if anyone found out.
Tim finds out first.
Of course he does this is Timothy Drake we're talking about.
Jason expects Tim to use this as blackmail. He's surprised when Tim doesn't. Even more surprised when Tim starts showing up for all their games, and becomes the most enthusiastic fan.
Cass follows Tim to a game one day. Gets as invested in these Baseball playing babies as Tim is.
Everything is all fine and dandy for a while... until Damian discovers the team.
Of course being the little demon he is, he forms a plan to destroy the team. "The team is a distraction to Todd and must be eliminated". So the little shit joins the team without Jason’s knowledge. His plan was was to start rumors and divide the team until it fell apart.
Buuuuut, turns out Damian Wayne likes baseball.
So now we have nearly half the wayne family invested in this team of 13 year old baseball players.
No one really knows how Barbara found out. She just started join Tim and Cass for the games.
Steph and Duke start showing up not long after. Showing up with enough snacks to feed a small nation.
The Wayne family turns out to be very enthusiastic... so much so that it makes headlines...
Annnnnnd that's how Dick Grayson joined the group.
And they thought the others were obnoxious...
This grown ass man shows up with a 6 by 2 foot banner that says "GO OUTLAWS" in giant glittery letters. He bring face paint and T-shirts for all the parents. Really he just gets way too into it.
Jason and Damian are mortified...
When Bruce sees the headlines, he thinks it's adorable. Of course he joins in all the shenanigans, just a little less chaotic.
Alfred just sits back and watches. He knew the whole time. He was the one to suggest Jason coach the team in the first place
⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ So beautiful I want to have his chunky babies ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
A Different Kind of Love
Pairing: Jason Todd (Red Hood) x Reader
Summary: Life as parents in Gotham isn’t easy, especially when one of you is the infamous Red Hood and the other is trying to keep things together at home. But when it’s just the three of you—your partner, your child, and yourself—the chaos of Gotham can feel a little less daunting. Jason Todd never thought he’d be a father, but with you by his side, he’s learning what it means to love unconditionally.
Warnings:
Parenthood and family fluff
Mild violence (Gotham-style crime-fighting, no explicit content)
Emotional moments
Mentions of Gotham’s dangerous environment
Gotham had a way of testing you, and Jason Todd knew that better than anyone. He’d faced the city’s worst criminals, had lived through death and resurrection, and still nothing had ever made him feel as vulnerable as the day he held his child for the first time.
It had been months since your daughter was born, and in that time, Jason had learned how to protect her just as fiercely as he protected you. But there was something else something softer and more terrifying than any criminal he’d faced: the overwhelming love he felt every time he saw her smile, every time she reached for him with her tiny hands.
He had never been good at emotions. His childhood was a wreck, and he’d never had the luxury of being part of a “normal” family. But with you, everything had changed. The little moments he shared with you and your daughter those were the things that made him believe there could be more to life than just surviving.
The sound of soft giggles drifted from the nursery, and Jason’s lips twitched upward as he adjusted his helmet, finishing up the last of his nightly routine. He knew he should’ve been out on patrol, but tonight, he had made a promise to stay home. Gotham would survive for a few hours without Red Hood especially when it meant he could be with you and the little one.
The door to the nursery creaked open, and there you were, standing in the doorway with your daughter in your arms. Her big eyes shone in the dim light, and when she saw Jason, her little face lit up in a grin.
"Hey, kiddo," Jason said, his voice unusually soft as he knelt down in front of her crib, taking in the sight of her tiny hands reaching toward him.
You watched from the doorway, smiling at the scene. Jason, the fierce vigilante who struck fear into the hearts of Gotham’s criminals, was completely undone by his little girl.
"I think she’s ready for her bedtime story," you said, a playful hint in your voice. "But maybe she wants her dad to read it tonight."
Jason raised an eyebrow, glancing up at you. "She’ll probably fall asleep halfway through, but you know what? I’ll take that as a challenge."
You laughed, and Jason gave you one of those rare, genuine smiles—one that he reserved only for you. He reached out for your daughter, taking her gently from your arms. His protective instincts kicked in as he cradled her against his chest, his strong arms instinctively holding her close, his fingers brushing over her tiny head with the utmost care.
"Alright, little one," Jason murmured, kissing the top of her head. "Let’s see if your old man can do this."
You leaned against the doorframe, watching as Jason settled down in the rocking chair, his daughter resting comfortably against his chest. For all the chaos in his life, for all the times he’d been pushed to the edge of his humanity, moments like these made him feel like he finally had something to fight for something to protect.
Jason cleared his throat, grabbing the book from the small shelf beside the chair. You’d been reading bedtime stories to your daughter for months, but tonight, Jason was in charge.
"So, uh… This one’s called The Brave Little Knight," Jason began, glancing at you for reassurance. "Don’t expect too much, kid. I’m not exactly a storybook kind of guy."
You smiled softly at his self-deprecating tone. Jason had never been good at this type of thing being soft, being gentle but for you and your daughter, he was trying. And that made your heart swell more than you could put into words.
As Jason read, his voice growing more confident with each sentence, your daughter’s eyes fluttered as she fought to stay awake. She was still young enough that the world was mostly about the comfort of your voices, the softness of your touch. But even now, Jason could see the spark of her growing personality in the way she tilted her head toward him, her tiny hands gripping his shirt like she was already trying to keep him close.
"You know," Jason said, his voice quieter now, his gaze softening as he looked down at the baby in his arms, "I never thought I’d be here, doing this."
You leaned against the doorframe, heart in your throat. "What do you mean?"
He hesitated for a moment, his fingers gently brushing your daughter’s cheek as he kept reading. "I wasn’t supposed to be anyone’s father. After everything… after the way I grew up… I never thought I’d be able to be the kind of dad she needs."
You stepped closer, resting a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t look at you, but you could feel the weight of his words.
"You’re exactly the kind of dad she needs, Jason," you said softly. "You might not have had the best role models, but you’re doing everything you can to be better for her. And that’s all she needs. All we need."
Jason swallowed hard, looking down at your daughter as she began to drift off in his arms. "I just… I don’t want to screw this up. I don’t want her to go through the same things I did."
"You won’t," you assured him, your voice steady. "We’re in this together. And no matter what happens, she’ll always know she’s loved. That’s more than we had, right?"
Jason finally looked up at you, his eyes filled with a tenderness that was so raw it took your breath away. "Yeah," he whispered. "You’re right."
He shifted in the chair, adjusting your daughter in his arms as she began to fall into a peaceful sleep. He kissed the top of her head and then looked back at you, his gaze softer than you’d ever seen it.
"Thank you," he murmured. "For giving me this. For giving us this."
You smiled and moved closer, brushing a hand through his hair. "I didn’t do it alone, Jason. You’re a great father. And she’s lucky to have you."
Jason nodded, his lips quirking into a small, almost hesitant smile. "I’m lucky to have you."
And in that moment, with the quiet hum of the night surrounding you, the chaos of Gotham seemed miles away. In that small, safe space, everything felt right. Just the three of you, holding onto each other as a family.
Jason Todd, Red Hood and protector of Gotham, was learning that love had a way of healing even the deepest wounds. And for him, that love was right here small, fragile, but unbreakable.
hear me out. combine Angel au with Tim Twins au.
...and the reason the bats never meet angel in person is cause he has some mobility issues.
like maybe he uses a wheelchair and/or needs braces or a cane or smth. or maybe it's like some disease that makes him unable to do strenuous activities, like pots.
idk man, it's 1 am, i brain barf first, research later.
but then they(bats + Jackson) get themselves in trouble and watch whichever-evil-bitch-is-responsable get intimidated by some kid that can't even stand properly.
like, it's joker vs Some Guy, and joker is NOT Winning. (prob not gonna go as far as joker tho)
and then Jackson is all 'this is Angel ^-^'
angel: hi. ...bye
jackson: isn't he neat? the skrungly.
and half the batfam is like 'wait they're the same age??? and probably twins??? Angel isn't some weird father figure???'
the other half of batfam: no wait, it makes sense now. i can see the whole "raised eachother" thing better having seen that. the voice changer was prob just fucking with us.
... haven't read the fic in a while so uhh mc'scuse me for inaccuracies.
Catwoman, you serve astronomically.
Here's another Nightwing, I actually drew this one before the other one I posted, but I don't really like this one, I think something about how I colored the skin is funky. Any suggestions?
Here's a drawing of nightwing.
Me: leaving my self isolation after three days (I lost a political argument i didn't even want to have with my mom (I was right))
Guys, let's colour batman
this is like my all time favorite thing about the robins ever (i have this video liked, fav'd, and saved from tiktok oml)
I LOVE STALKER TIM
Had this idea a month ago, it was supposed to be fully animated at some point but… 😬 didn’t work out lol
Had to pull out after effects for this one pls appreciate my death wish
So I’ve been thinking about the bat fam in the future and the family is gonna be HUGE especially if people are adopting/ having kids to the same amount Bruce did which means there will be drama, arguments and more. This is coming from someone with a very VERY large extended family.
I know the press will probably mess up the names of who did what too which would cause more arguments but never anyone cutting each other off because they’re annoyed but it’s tolerable plus they’ll have a turn to laugh.
Bruce also probably enjoys being a grandpa too albeit is probably that one who is awkward to get to know at first.
I dont know why i do this
Would you trust me from my kin list?
So Batman died last week and no one was gonna tell me?
Of course my first art post on here is a shit post... 🤦♂️ Anyway I'm sure someone did this already probably so I'm sorry. But I had to. Pls ignore the sloppy shading on Wolverine, I didn't want to spend more time on this then I already had.. Original under the read more. Oh also I have a blank one for you. If you use it for some god forsaken reason tag me so I can see it pls ^_^
I've been seeing a thing or two about a DC au where the justice leage, specifically Batman/Bruce is a patient at a mental asylum and all his villans are just workers at the asylum.
But what about the bat family? What about Alfred? What about Cat Woman?
Here's my take on it:
Alfred is a family friend of the Wayne's and basically like an uncle to Bruce before Bruce's parents died (which i headcannon for this universe that they died in a fire that left Bruce scarred and Bruce loved superheros because i think it ties to his delusions)
And Alfred visits Bruce as often as he can, making sure to try and be nice to him, like bringing him paperdolls and crayons to draw with under the supervision of the doctors at the mental asylum.
And those paperdolls? They're the bat family alright.
Every single doll is a member of the bat family, with Bruce imagening how they are his kids that help him fight off 'his villans' and is very protective of, only letting Alfred and Cat Woman (who's another doctor at the asylum that is nice to him and he views her as an okay most of the time) and will always carry them around with him, imagening and caring for them like they are real children, but they are all delusions with a little bit of Bruce's personality and traits from when he was younger and not crazy.
And also, Jason's death was just Dr. Jack Napier (the Joker) aciddently ripping the paper doll of Jason when Bruce and Jack got into a scuffle, and because of Bruce's delusions, they decided (behind Jack's back, specifically Selina Kyle {who's Cat woman} decided to do this after they all saw how distressed and more mentally unstable Bruce got) to give Bruce more paper dolls and fix up Jason before they gave it all back to Bruce.
And i'll leave it at that, i'll let you all give your own thoughts about it. :)
You guys ever see a movie you like so much and some fucking freak decides to twist it into their disgusting fantasy.
"I have to be there when he needs me. He forgot to tell me. --Do heroes cry?" - Detective Comics #618 --- 90s Tim Drake Robin run you will always have a special place in my heart <3 <3
My guilt will not purify me.
(Batgirl 2000 permanently altered my brain chemistry)
We can make BruHarvey / TwoBats real and they couldn't do anything about it. I'm making the "Tonight, Harvey Dent fucks men" real
So if I understand this correctly, if I manage to make it to 2038, I would be allowed to write and sell a legal Two-Face book, but it could only incorporate strict elements from his very first appearance plus just Batman stuff from before then? Because if so, that’d be perfect. Aside from his original name being Harvey Kent, almost everything I love about the character was baked right into his first appearance, including potential that subsequent writers neglected to embrace.