Belli Talks - Blog Posts
Strawpage~
I've been so inspired lately, seeing so many people make their own Strawpage sites that I wanted to join in! It's very Kat-themed from the DMC reboot, but she's cute so it's ok! https://mandragoreos.straw.page/
Asked by no one but wanted to ramble and list some horror games that I think are pretty neat~
Mouthwashing:
If you couldn’t tell I adore this game, the premise and theme of the game is handled so well, the characters are great and there is so much ‘show don’t tell’ in this game that sparks so much conversation
American McGee’s Alice:
I know Madness Returns is the more popular Alice game due to it being more accessible at the time but please, PLEASE watch a playthrough or give McGee’s Alice a chance. While the gameplay is rough and bumby the atmosphere, THE ATMOSPHERE CHEFS KISS. I love how sharp, angular and jagged everything, wonderland is twisted and macabre the music is THE MUSIC MAGNIFICENT!
Alisa:
A fairly recent horror game that has their own special place in my heart. While the story is confusing and doesn’t make sense, to be fair it could just be part of the game’s charm and will probably be fleshed out in the sequel. Alisa is such a cute and creepy little game that takes me back to my childhood of first discovering horror games on the PS1. The characters are fun, the love is oozing from the game and the music makes you feel like you’re in a toy box filled nightmare.
Haunting Ground:
I’ll get out of the way that I am extremely biased towards Haunting Ground and will get territorial of this game. This is my comfort game, it’s been with me for my lowest points in life and highest points of life. Belli Castle is my second home. I’ll be here all day rambling nonsense about this game so let’s just move to the next one!
Silent Hill 3
This here is a game to play when you want to relive your teenage angsty years. Heather is such a lovable character as we go through her average day to a not so average revenge plot. I’ll go ahead and add (beg) to please check out Silent Hill 1 and Shattered Memories because Harry Mason is just as deserving of attention as his blonde who has more fun daughter.
Clock Tower
The original Clock Tower is one of my gateways into the realm of survival horror, it’s how I discovered Haunting Ground, Siren, and many other horror gems. While I unfortunately haven’t played Rewind I can still praise the classic and its series. I am a sucker for horror games that allow you use brains over brawn and allow the character to shine through their wits and the Clock Tower games do just that!
Kuon
This eerie gem pulls you in right away just with the title screen, the soft lullaby that greets you has stuck with me years after I have played the game and it still unsettles me. Although the game can be a tad slow since the game recommends you to walk not run I do think it adds to the creepiness because you don’t want to risk alerting enemies. I love how you can play the game from multiple perspective as well! Though this is a game if you can play it versus watching a playthrough, I’d recommend that! Watching a no commentary playthrough of this game is more of a sleep aid unfortunately…but playing it and forcing yourself to continue the journey, very spooky, very creepy, especially in the dark.
A misconception I see often in the Mouthwashing Fandom
Daisuke & Swansea did nothing
I’ve been seeing many posts regarding this topic and it really confuses me on how it’s spread…
SPOILERS AHEAD
Let’s get sweet baby boy out of the way, Daisuke.
Daisuke is the youngest of the Tulpar crew, scene often by Swansea’s side, they are a joint package do not separate (I don’t mean as a ship)
In my honest opinion, I doubt Daisuke knew ANYTHING about what happened to Anya, we have to take the narrative were given with a grain of salt since most of it is through Jimmy’s eyes, but something we can take out of it is Daisuke’s death.
Daisuke before he dies is told to close his eyes, eyes seem to be a very important part of Mouthwashing and the narrative, Curly has one eye visible, Swansea loses an eye and Daisuke is told to close his eyes
With him being the youngest, and the crew looking to him as “the baby” or “kiddo”
Like what children do when scared or are exposed to something they aren’t supposed to see, they’re told to close their eyes, to preserve their innocence
Because of this I don’t think Daisuke knew anything regarding Anya’s situation, we see her tell two people. Curly and Swansea
Why do I think Swansea DID something?
There’s many instances where I believe Swansea was on Anya’s side
1st when the two are talking in the cockpit. Jimmy find the two, almost talking in secrecy, the cockpit being one of the few places that has a lock, a safe place for Anya to be vulnerable, to let someone in.
She allowed herself to be vulnerable with Curly in this room and here she is doing the same with Swansea, there conversation is cut short when Jimmy enters the room. Anya quick to barely utter a word while Swansea stares him down, ax in hand, arms crossed. His body language is guarded. Each time Jimmy talks, Swansea is quick to shut him down, brush him off, dismissing him just as Jimmy does Anya.
2nd instance I feel Swansea did something is after Daisuke and Anya’s death. Swansea is ENRAGED, chasing Jimmy down with an ax while he’s locked away in the cockpit, breaking in even
Some would argue that Swansea only cared for Daisuke, but I don’t think that’s true, he comes off as abrasive and intimidating, but let’s keep in mind too. Swansea is a father who cares deeply for his kids, with Anya and Daisuke being younger than him, probably the same age as his children, the two having moments of nativity, seeking guidance from him, Swansea probably saw his kids in the two.
In each scene with the Tulpar crew, Swansea is shown close to both of them, Jimmy almost isolated or in his own corner
Those are my thoughts so far, there’s definitely a lot more I could add but I’m unfortunately drawing a blank. Please feel free to give your thoughts and opinions on this though!
I haven’t been as active as of late, been focusing on mental health and occupying my time with other things, I come back to the web and the Mouthwashing fandom got me like—WHAT HAPPENED???
Something I realized about Anya is that her text is a teal color, teal is the same color of the ribbons for Sexual Assault Awareness Month and—I just find that really neat and nice
I’m going to do a second playthrough of Mouthwashing over the weekend to get some more screencaps and to see if I can find Curly and that one guy’s ID Cards! There’s apparently other achievements I can unlock too so I’m going to try that out as well
Don’t ask me why, but this made me laugh. Swansea really said “don’t worry ‘bout it!”
I didn’t know you could find the crew’s IDs! I’m missing Curly and that other guy’s ID, so on a second playthrough I’ll have to scavenge for them!
“This is fine.”
-Curly probably
Guess who got Mouthwashing on her laptop and was getting screencaps like crazy~
It was me~~~~~
Sorry for being so quiet everyone! Work has me busy and I’ve been on and off sick the past couple weeks, and trying to get outside a bit more before it gets too cold
Not going on hiatus or anything, just know my posting will slow down a bit, plus trying to fix my sleep schedule <_<;
Spoilers for SH2R
Tw for Angela and themes of SA and Abuse, nothing explicitly mentioned but is hinted at, IYKYK!
Can I say how absolutely TERRIFYING the Abstract Daddy Boss fight is in the remake, the game not only puts you in Angela’s shoes but also watching her run from the monster, the monster that has caused her so much torment, that same one that is now pursuing you.
Having the player practically hide away, just as Angela would, cowering in a closet or anywhere that was closed off, somewhere out of sight, where she could ball up and be small, away from the monster.
Her hiding space becoming destroyed, showing that regardless if you fight or hide, it doesn’t matter until you are free
It’s terrifying and disgusting… I hated this part so much, not because of its mechanic or how it played, but because of how genuinely terrifying and how real it feels.
To end this on a lighter note, please be sure to take care of yourself. Drink water, be sure to eat, and enjoy the freedom of nature if you can. If you’re playing or watching this game, do try to pace yourself because it is very intense.
It really stinks when a piece of media that you’ve enjoyed as a kid is “ruined” by one person, where any time you try to engage with that piece of media it makes you frustrated and annoyed, despite still loving it. It sounds silly, and I know it’s dumb but can’t help but to feel this way.
I like to think while Anya was caring for Curly, she would talk to him. Rambling about various things, wether it was to vent, talking about the crew to let her captain know what was going on, or just the most mundane of things.
Even leading up to her final moments, despite Daisuke and Germbo calling for her, screaming for her to open the door and having to go another route to reach her.
She’d talk to Curly. Regardless if her voice trembled or cracked, no matter how much she shook or vision blurred from tears or to shut out the world by closing them. She would talk to him.
Sitting on the floor by his side, standing before him, or in a seat across from him.
She would talk to him, and he would listen.
Did I order a sweater today because it reminded me of my girl Anya? Why yes, yes I did.
That and because I need new clothes…
Can we give Swansea some more love and attention that he deserves, because while he is not completely in control of his emotions and is quick to react, it all came from a good reason that being he cared so much for the crew.
Daisuke, he saw so much potential in almost like a son, for him to be there for Daisuke at every turn, even being the one to put him out of his misery so he didn’t have to suffer anymore, even telling Daisuke to close his eyes so he wouldn’t see what would happen, he cared so much.
And when Anya confided in him about what happened to her, he came CHARGING to put an end to all of it, for Anya, for Daisuke, for EVERYONE.
I feel like we don’t give Swansea enough attention, and we should!
In this house we love and support Anya, Jimmy can go kick rocks.
Below is me just rambling about Anya, if you want to read that
Anya is such a great character, Daisuke and Swansea as well. I do hope Swansea gets more attention in the fandom/community because he is so interesting and is such a dad figure (to me at least)
I really loved Anya (probably because I could relate to her) the way, despite her anxieties and fears swallowed her up, she tried her hardest to get through things. Even while Jimmy put her down, was so condescending at any chance her got with her, despite her locking up she did what she could do, especially during the circumstances she was facing.
Do I ship her and Curly? Low key, but I agree Curly should’ve done something but at the same time I am understanding that there were limitations of what he could really do, they were in space, what could he really do other than give Jimmy the boot into the stratosphere?
Anyways, please go watch/play Mouthwashing it was really cool, though keep in mind any triggers because this game is a psychological thriller and has an abstract narrative.
Because I can feel my depression kicking in, this is a reminder to anyone this may come across
Take care of yourself and listen to your body, not your brain, especially if it’s cruel to you.
Allow yourself to rest, you aren’t selfish for taking care of your needs
Please, for the love of all that is holy, drink water! Your body will thank you so much
Get out and enjoy ‘the freedom of nature’s gifts’ because fresh air and a good walk definitely can help you, especially if you’re someone who stays cooped up inside all day long.
Remember too, your family cares about you, and if your family doesn’t, your friends do, and if they don’t, someone out there in the world does
So far my only complaint with the Silent Hill 2 Remake is Maria’s AI, especially in combat scenarios.
I don’t mind escorting a character around, because I love Resident Evil 4, Silent Hill 4, and other games that have had escort segments
But in the original Maria wasn’t on top of the player during combat sections, this bad…like Maria, please, few feet back or get with the program and fight with me!
psst I saw your post about dreamlike games. if you haven't yet, try Dreamfarer on itch.io. it's free! there's also All Dream Long A Flower Storm, Awareness Rooms, and Dreamscape Abyss on steam. Awareness Rooms is $5 (I recommend getting it on sale) but the other two are also free!
Thank you so much!! I will definitely need to check out these games!
I haven’t checked out steam or itch.io in such a long time to be honest I forgot they existed, I’m so use to playing my PS3 or PS2 😆
Thank you so much!! I shall check these games out!
People really disgust me, all the comments and remake about SH2R Angela is just so upsetting, I don’t understand how tone deaf and insensitive people can be…
If you came for a game that’s “fanservice” and filled with “beautiful women” then obviously this isn’t the one for you, don’t complain or made crude remarks because you can’t read the room with the subject matter.
Anyways, Angela is beautiful and a wonderful character who deserves all the love in the world, I will gladly give her some hot chocolate, a cozy blanket, and be her friend
I really need to give Alan Wake a second chance, playing it myself was enough to want me to pull my hair out… I’m so curious about his journey though
Definitely will have to watch a playthrough one of these days after I finish replaying Silent Hill 4
I wanted to make a post about Amanda because I feel she as a character is equally if not more sympathetic of a character as Jennifer
I feel as though many people, fans included (I can't speak for all just those I've exchanged words with in passing and just overlooking in the fandom space) Many people ridicule and downright put Amanda down just like the Aristocrat Club, which is understandable for Viewers and Players of the game. I do agree sometimes, Amanda can be just as cruel as the other children, even creepy, but she's just as much as a victim to the Aristocrat club members as Jennifer and I feel many overlook that. Amanda is trying to survive just like Jennifer, while Jennifer may not "care" about her status in the club, Amanda seems to, she wants to fit in, she wants to be apart of something. She tries so desperately to fit in with the others only to be poked fun at or dismissed Children are unfortunately cruel, and Amanda unfortunately because of not only her appearance and personality she is a common candidate to be bullied and harassed, it's just so upsetting...Seeing her in the intro of the game trying on make up, like many little girls do to feel pretty and seen, Amanda wants to be seen. Amanda trying so hard, so very hard to go above and beyond for the monthly gifts of the Aristocrat Club, sure she may be harsh herself, hiding her findings from Jennifer, sometimes even refusing to help, Jennifer is a more likely candidate to win these small competitions because she in close with Wendy...Amanda has no one, Jennifer at least has Brown, who does Amanda have? Amanda is so talented, sewing up clothing, rags, she's a princess who sews, yet is hidden away, like her diary. Her thoughts, feelings, dreams to fly away like a fairy to shine bright is locked away, away from the harsh treatment of her peers. I don't even feel like Amanda wants to be popular, she just wants to belong and fit in, like many of us, she wants to be apart of a group, to have a friend, even a single friend is all she wishes for... I think that's all I have for this post, let me know your thoughts~ -Belli
I just want to ramble about one of my favorite characters that gets over looked in her own game (because let’s agree while Bates is really cool) his sister Alyssa is equally as interesting and mysterious.
While Alyssa is much more meek and fearful, she is very peculiar. Caring for her family regardless of the Maxwell Curse, even after learning of her history, who her father(s) are, she still cares for Allen Hale, despite his actions.
Even as a teenager, watching her little cousin become possessed by the Maxwell Curse, overcoming obstacles and fending off strange characters, she’s resilient
Sure she had Bates by her side to assist through it all, he’s always there for her, protecting her, keeping her safe, just like that time when she was bullied by her class mates, Bates was there
But Alyssa doesn’t rely on Bates, never is she like “I need Bates to save me” she wants to keep him locked away, hidden, suppressed. Regardless of how hard things got, she stood her ground or used quick thinking to overcome the challenge.
I understand that Clock Tower 2/Ghost Head is the “lesser” Clock Tower game, but I always viewed it as its own stand alone game.
That and I’m very biased towards these cursed twins
Let me know what you guys think though! Do you think Alyssa is an interesting character? Did you enjoy this game? Let me know your thoughts!
- Belli
I found this image via Pinterest, SO IF OWNER OF IMAGE WOULD LIKE ME TO REMOVE LET ME KNOW!
You look me in my eye and tell me this man isn’t playing The Sims loaded with mods.
This Vergil, with his hundreds of hard drives with thousands of terabytes of “data”
D a t a
D A T A
No no no, this man doesn’t got “data” “evidence” or “plans”
No he has BILLIONS of mods for his Sims, living vicariously through them in his Gamer Pad
Kat new how important those Sims were to Vergil, she knew how cool they were because she helped with the lore on those Sims
They stayed up for HOURS, H O U R S making stories on these Sims, those Sims had families, lovers, BETA FISH
I really need to read the comics for DMC Devil May Cry, I’m so starved for content with that game.
I understand why many didn’t like the game, it’s full of edge and it’s definitely too loud and crude with its humor, but that was the style of the time *insert Simpsons clip here*
Kat is a character I really like and wished we got to see more of, even if it was just a mention or a reference to her. She’s such an interesting character, though I think as someone who maladaptive daydreams I’ve related to how she uses Limbo as an escape when things become to much, escaping the nightmares of you will.
Dante in the reboot is just so fun, he gives off that punk attitude so well but we see him as a character grow and develop as the game progresses, becoming more mature, fighting for a reason and understanding those around him more, not just a “selfish brat” but a young adult growing up and maturing
Plus I’m just a sucker for Kat and Dante as a couple, please, spare me a crumb of cute Kat and Dante content, please I beg
HOW COULD I FORGET MY MALADAPTIVE SWEET PEA THATS SO ME KAT
Characters that are literally me
I need to find more games that have a more “Dreamlike” atmosphere, escapism to other worlds is something I always like to explore
I adore fluttering in the air like a butterfly as towering playing cards build a path for me in Alice Madness Returns as I discover my past and the culprit of my misfortune.
I love the nonsense dreams of maze like worlds sealed away by a single door in Yume Nikki
Obtaining merit badges and diving into the mind of my friends and mentors in Psychonauts
A single fork in hand, scampering through narrow corridors with my dog as butterflies illuminate the hall in Rule of Rose
So many wonderful games…I need more
I really just love and enjoy games like this, just exploration filled with wonder and whimsy, especially if there’s the element of unfolding trauma because—psychology and the way the brain processes things is really interesting!