Bg3 Memes - Blog Posts

Gale is my 1950s weak male wife that cooks dinner for me after a long day of work and looks after the kids.

(yes I made this)

I made a dumb thing 🙃

This ends up being my party, every time.

Mechanic/Feat Idea

Silliest worshipper

Description: You have the ability to use Divine Intervention and all the other “Ask to your God” spells any times you want with an instant recharge only if you use it for something silly (DM’s decision) and if your God is Chaotic-Neutral/Good aligned.

Functionality: You use the spell to ask something silly to your God (another of the same meal you just had, to win a low/no reward slug race, have a nice silly hat, find a good pun on the spot, etc etc) and the God does it, then you feel a pat on your head and hear an astral voice say “Yes, sure darling, no need to use your precious spells for this” you feel warm and then everything turns back to normal, with your wish granted.

This can also work for warlocks only if your patron is Chaotic-Neutral/Good aligned.

In general, this can take effects if your deity is a momma type, even if it’s Lawful/Good but if it is Lawful/Good sometimes it will say things like “But next time use it for good alright sweetie?” making you feel slightly guilty, the more you use it for sillies without using it for something good.

Inspiration: the BG3 playthrough of @dare-to-dm (silly paladins are my favourite, use this so you can have fun in D&D sweetie ❤️)

Lae'zel:

The rest of the team:

Sometimes, a family is just an emo goth, an angry space frog, a purple misandrist, a vampire twink, an autistic magician, a golden retriever butch, a half-devil fencer, a furry, a folklore grandma, a bald guy and his hamster, a random adventurer with a weird name, and a psychotic amnesiac with a migraine -- all surrounded by a bunch of pets that they adopted off the side of the road.

A decaying mummy holds the sole of their guardianship.

And so the adventure begins! This is Shalyn, my wood elf ranger disney princess.

My humour has peaked

I’ve almost completed my first walkthrough!! Yeah, I started when it came out… yeah I’m slow

And of course I romance Lae’zel (and I play as gorgeous green dragonborn priestess)

Gale: I'M GONNA FUCK THAT LIZARD

I’M GONNA FUCK THAT WIZARD

Anything for bbgirl :)

This is the most cannon shit I've ever read on this site

Some goblin Astarion things.

He pinches you when you toss and turn too much in your shared bed. “Wake up and stop flailing! Gods. I’ll have bruises from your pointy elbows in the morning.”

He sews “kick me” on the butt of Gale’s trousers in dark, dark gray after the Wizard pisses him off. Karlach sees it with her dark vision when they’re in the Underdark and promptly knees him in the ass.

He steals all of Halsin’s wooden ducks and plants them in Wyll’s tent, for shits and giggles.

He tries to line a tripwire across the front of Lae’zel’s tent entrance, but ends up pricking himself on a blow dart booby trap he failed to perceive. Incurs -3 hit points and the bleeding condition for 10 turns.

He nips your neck like a disgruntled cockatoo when you tease him in front of the other party members.

He puts swamp green clothing dye in Shadowheart’s bottle of hair dye when she’s not looking, causing her to endure some sickly green highlights for a fortnight.

He steals Wither’s staff while he’s speaking with Jaheria and hides it among Lae’zel’s armory. Gets hauled over by the ear by Jaheira to apologize to Withers. And Lae’zel.

He hides in the bushes near camp and makes god-awful wailing noises to keep Scratch and the owlbear cub barking while the party is trying to get some sleep.

He fabricates some ridiculous story about how the Weave is really a hoax designed by Big Magic to control the masses, just to see Gale go purple in the face while arguing against this “utter tripe.”

He loudly proclaims that he overheard Shadowheart telling Wyll she could beat Lae’zel in unarmed combat with a hand tied behind her back, then scampers away cackling when the two lady warriors start yelling at one another.