Cpk.creature - Blog Posts
Do you have a theory about why dogs with short legs are so chaotic?
All dogs are chaotic to at least some degree, it's just more shocking from the short ones because they bear an uncanny resemblance to plush toys. They look like teddy bears, but make no mistake, this is a wolf with social graces and the knowledge that you are VERY easily manipulated by Cuteness.
Oh Laika, patron saint of one way trips, I hope our sun is a warm yellow ball to forever play with.
We picked you because we saw greatness,
We picked you because you were the best.
We picked you and you loved us,
And we loved you too.
We called you a name,
We made you home.
Between our game,
Between the unknown.
When we made you a new house,
We loved you.
When we knew it was a coffin,
We loved you.
When we kissed you nose goodbye,
We loved you.
When we sent you to the sky,
We loved you.
You were confused, most likely,
Scared, certainly.
And we loved you.
As the engine died,
As you were left alone in the dark,
No one you could recognize around,
In a space too small yet too vast.
Did you know that we loved you ?
Did it matter ?
You died like a star,
And we never saw you again,
We were the reason, I'm afraid.
At never again, my friend.
An Incomplete List of the Animals my Grandpa brought home over the course of his 67-year marriage to Gandma:
Annabell, a solid white and completely deaf pit bull that used to let mom draw on her belly
The World’s Ugliest Tom Cat, who turned out to be the cuddiest teddy bear of an animal
Cocker spaniel named “Captain”
Stupid, the Cat
Litter of baby raccoons
Three more cats
A completely bald and extremely anxious canary that sang beautifully, but only at 4 AM
Baby Squirrel that grew up in the house and then refused to move out
A Genuine Thoroughbred Racehorse who was a spectacular athelete but had a habit of running races in the wrong direction. Benny turned out to be a terrific trail horse instead.
Turtle
Snapping Turtle
A bucket full of 43 goldfish left over from the fair. Mom counted once they were all in the bathtub in the backyard with the snapping turtle.
Another cocker spaniel named “Major”, who had the tremendous talent of eating green beans silently
Red-tailed hawk he found on the highway, and sucessfully nursed back to health and released.
Dummy, Son of Stupid
Strange, the dog that lived under the porch and only came into the house at night.
An “abandoned” baby deer.
Spooky, an alleged dog.
Joey the parakeet whose tricks were 1. drinking tea out of a tiny cup 2. threatening to peck out people’s eyes 3. wearing hats
A Really Big Toad he found behind the factory, because the other auto workers were discussing using it for target practice. Mr. Grumpity was guardian of the rosebed for several years and granny’s (his mother) favorite animal he ever brought home.
Gretchen, a St. Bernard that had to be shaved from her prior owner’s neglect, and spent a week hiding from sight with such success in the house that they thought she’d run away.
Arson, Burglary and Murder, three frankly adorable little kittens. They did not change the names, much to the regret of the cop who lived three doors down.
Yet another Cocker Spaniel, named “Colonel”
Cardinal (bird)
Canada Goose (Demon)
Once in the nursing home, he had a “pet” 12-point whitetail buck that would come to his window to be fed corn and get headskritches, inexplicably named “Florence”
The marriage only ended because thier time on earth did. He never kept an animal Grandma wouldn’t allow and if anything she was worse about it. She was the one who brought home a tarantula.
so i’ve got this really small bathroom spider. i’m talkin super teeny tiny, like micron sized, this dude is naught but a speck of dust. he’s behind the faucet of the sink in there, his webs structured to rely on the faucet and the wall behind it. every time i wash my hands i have to turn the handle some of his foundation rests upon and it makes his web jiggle a bunch and he kinda like scrambles around to stay on it and it’s pretty cute and funny to watch. but then i finish washing my hands and turn the faucet off and it’s fine, he’s back to normal and everything is chill, maybe just a couple strands to fix after he catches his breath. and at first i was gonna post about this and be like “lol poor motherfucker what an incomparably crazy situation that is for him” but then i realized that humans experience earthquakes all the time and i went. ah. hm. We Are All Bathroom Spiders In the House of God, i suppose
There’s thousands of people out there right now crying about a dog that was sent to space. I’m one of them too. She’s been dead for so long but we made art about her. We made songs for her. We named new puppies after her. We put up a statue in her honor.
How can you say humanity is inherently evil when we still mourn for a dog that died in 1957? We love you Laika.
Three young barn owls standing in the stone quatrefoil of Christ Church, Fulmodeston.
I stumbled across a photo (by Lindy Pollard) that fantastically mirrors a little dragon I drew a few years ago.... I can't get over this...
Please does anybody have the picture of the orange kitten sitting in front of old yellowed wood paneling and it’s smiling like this. The post where I saw it went something like “little kids before they learn how to smile in photos”
more public art! these fellas were printed on vinyl for the sides of a traffic cabinet
"nothing is real atoms never touch each other youve never touched anything in your life" ok. well when i pet my dog he is soft and when he licks my hand it is wet and that is far more real to me than whatevers going on at an atomic level
sold
I had such trouble carving the dorsal fin on this guy but I think it turned out good