There is a major MRA/redpill/manopshere talking point that needs to be confronted and debunked. Many redpillers argue that the family courts are unfair to fathers in custody disputes and always let the mother have the children.
It's important for women thinking about having children to realize that this isn't true. You could absolutely lose your kids.
First, the great majority (over 90%) of the time, the father doesn't ask for custody. It is a sad fact that when a male loses sexual access to the mother of his children (whether she breaks up with/divorces him or vice versa), he doesn't care about his children anymore. Of course, this is not always the case, but a large percentage of the time, possibly most of the time. This data point belies males' assertion that they care about and love their kids and the big, bad woman is keeping them away.
Second, the majority (about 70%) of the time when males request at least half custody, they receive it. Horrifyingly, abusive fathers are more likely to want full custody, and they often receive it. In fact, in multiple states, a rapist can get custody of the resulting baby. Remember that not long ago domestic violence and child sexual assault were considered "family matters."
Third, many males who have custody aren't even raising their own kids. Their own mother or sister or the new girlfriend is actually watching the kids. This is largely due to the fact that 75% of childcare is done by the mother, not the father, so many males do not know how to take care of their children, what their routines are, what their allergies are and the ins-and-outs of their medical conditions, etc. Most of the time these women are not getting paid to watch the kids, and the only reason he even asked for custody is so he doesn't have to pay child support as well as to spite the mother. We have all seen fathers go viral and get treated like superheroes for doing something simple such as brushing their kid's hair.
I have a couple anecdotes related to the above. I was once friends with someone who was dating a cop who was not in his 4-year-old daughter's life. When I asked why, she regurgitated to me what he had told her, that the evil woman wouldn't let him see his child. I told her that getting the other parent considered "unfit" by the court was actually a pretty high bar to meet and that especially with him being a cop, all he would have to do if he actually cared was to go to court and request joint custody, that he would surely get it. We all know of cases where CPS even gave kids back to drug-addicted, negligent, or violent parents. I informed her she was dating someone who didn't care about his kid. Her face was priceless.
In another situation, when my sister was a teen, she was friends with someone whose father had done prison time for raping a 16-year-old-girl and a 14-year-old boy. He was a house painter, which is how he had access to them. My sister's friend was a 16-year-old girl and her brother was a 14-year-old boy, the exact demographics of those their father had raped. Their mother allowed him back in the house when he got out of prison, which, shockingly, the law also allowed him to do. In fact, my mother didn't find out he was a convicted child sex offender until my sister had slept over at their house multiple times.
This is an important manopshere talking point to rebut and about which to set the story straight because it's one of those myths even women calling themselves "feminists" have largely fallen for. Please do not make children with males. There are a lot of great reasons not to do so, but this is definitely one of them. Do not go into parenthood with a false sense of security and wearing rose-colored glasses believing that if things go downhill, the children will stay with you.
There is a young boy at my school. I have no idea what he has been through for the past several months. All I know is that his grandfather now has custody of a two-year-old, a four-year-old, and a six-year-old (my student). These kids haven’t been in school since it shut down back in March of 2020. Grandpa owns his own company…a small one-person kind of company. He can’t afford to feed and clothe these kids. Mercifully this little guy has a decent coat and sneakers.
My school provided a backpack.
His other teacher provided school supplies.
I bought him masks and hand sanitizer. His teacher showed me a picture of him with a messy faced grin as he ate his breakfast. One of the masks I got him hung just under his chin. It was dark blue with stars and rocket ships. I’m so happy I could put a smile on this boy’s face!
Now if only I could get him to like reading…
when someone asks my why i am the way i am but my parents who lived on apoosite sides of the country had a 50/50 custody agreement for me.