A few hours after having entered the tower, Ling realizes that her split party never established an exit strategy, nor a means of communication. For a wizard, this is an embarrassing oversight.
Getting her things together, Ling attempts to sneak through the dark halls, but is quickly grabbed by a shadow and dragged into a new location.
Ling now stands in a decently decorated throne room. Crystal sconces and chandelier shine faint light. A lovely carpet stretches from the large door behind her to the cushioned throne ahead. Barely visible to Ling, sits the Shadow Queen; an usually pale busty elf-like being in a black slit dress with opera gloves. Her long curly hair is intricately woven.
"G'day," says Ling, "Mind giving a light?"
"Why are you in my house?" ask the Shadow Queen as the darkness in the room thickens, "Explain yourself."
"Ya got it," says Ling, leaning her body slightly, "I'm a scholar and I came to propose a business venture to ya."
"And you came alone?"
"...No," says Ling, "Had a friend, a priestess of Vanessa."
"Just one?" The Shadow Queen rocks back and forth, "Don't lie to me."
"I'm not lying."
Claws take form amongst the darkness and lunge at Ling. She skitters away. She rolls and hops about away from the constant barrage. Ling pulls rock from her bag and charms it to shine brightly. The shadows recede and the Shadow Queen growls.
J: We know her name's Melandria; stop calling her the Shadow Queen.
"You think that parlor trick will save you," she yells as the shadow limbs long steel polearms and bows and arrows. The solid weapons are unimpeded by Ling's light and force her to continue dodging.
As she dodges, Ling gets a better look at the elf-esque being. Her ears are small and round. If her hair wasn't black, Ling would assume she was albino.
"Who does your hair?" asks Ling, skittering up the wall desperately avoiding arrows... or at least, looking desperate. "Is it dyed?"
L: Obviously, I cast a wind shield as soon as I had seen the bows.
"What? Yes, but- No one, I d-" Melandria stops herself, "Stop talking to me, you, weird lizard."
"Gecko, actually," says Ling jumping into Melandria's face, "So what are you?"
The woman on the throne pauses, as do her weapons. The gecko's eyes are fixated on something just under her eyes. "What are you doing?"
"Got to be blunt, mate," Ling shakes her head, "You look sick."
"It's a skin condition," says Melandria, "I'm al-"
"Albino, I figured," says Ling, "But that's not it. Ya're malnourished, starving even." She grabs Melandria's hand. "What have ya been eating?"
Melandria pulls her hand away and conjures a piece of bread. "I have plenty of food. I'm strong enough to feed myself."
Ling pulls a potato out from her pouch. "Eat this."
Melandria balks at the tuber.
"I'm a doctor," says Ling before Melandria can speak, "If ya've only been eating mana manna, ya're going to rot away inside out."
Melandria warms the potato and rips it open. With a conjured fork, she begins eating.
"First saw this back at wiz school during the Great War," says Ling, "Spellies eating their own mana's no healthier than eating their own skin. And that's true even for one's that know healthy eating." Ling watches Melandria shovel food into her mouth. "Which most don't."
"Name's Melandria and I'm human," she says in between bites of food, "Since you asked."
"From the surface, eh?" Ling smiles. "My mum's from there."
The two duos, one metal-clad, the other leather, approach each other across the black sand.
L: By the way, they are Gish and her brother, Gash. They never told me their names; Melandria did.
D: Spoiler.
L: What? You should already know I talk to her; that's the whole point of the story!
"Why are you out here?" asks Gish.
"Where do you think you are?" asks Gash.
"Both questies: we're lost in the Underdank," says Ling, she gestures for Kalyani to answer.
"Quite," says the priestess, "If you could point uss in the directshion of the nearesst town, we'd apprecciate it."
"That symbol," says Gash, "That eyeball you're wearing... What manner of follower are you?"
"Do you know it, brother?" asks Gish. She reaches for her sword, but before she draws it, Gash answers.
"That's the Love God's Eye," he says, "So how do you serve her?"
"Oh, you know her?" asks Kalyani, fluttering her eyes. She slithers toward Gash. "Are you a follower too?"
"Brother," Gish voices tings with annoyance.
"Let him have some fun, mate," says Ling, scampering up to Gish, "Yous two alone out here?"
J: I should have known. You're a wizard, Mum; don't you have stories about succeeding through... you know, wizardry?
L: Magic isn't the only answer to problems, Jevoi.
"No, we-" Gish cuts herself off, "Why are you really here? What do you think you're doing?"
"What do you want me to do?" asks Ling, still sauntering forward. Lacking the ability to flutter, she quickly licks her eyes instead. At the moment, she has no idea where this will lead, but it is succeeding as a distraction.
Gish takes a step backward. Out of the corner of her eye, she spots Kalyani encircling Gash.
"Perhapss, we've not been honesst," whispers Kalyani, "The Goddesss ssent uss."
"Somebody needs our help," says Ling, "Is it ya?" Ling gets up to Gish's faceplate. "A big strong woman like you shouldn't be alone."
"I- I'm not," says Gish, "My brother and I-"
"Brother doesn't count, mate," says Ling, now fully confident, "Let's see those eyes of yours." Ling places her hands on Gish's helmet, who does not resist. Ling carefully remove it and looks upon Gish's battle-scarred tallgoblin face. "Looks like ya had some bark taken off, eh?" Ling gently traces her claw down the diagonal scars; they clearly came from a claw attack.
Gish face contorts. "Would- would you like to see," she says, struggling to keep her strong warrior demeanor, "My other ones?"
"I'd love to," says Ling.
L: Long story short: they let us into the tower and we kept them distracted for a bit.
The party enters a massive sandy chamber, they stand atop a slope above the black desert. The fossilized remains of a massive spike-shelled creature lies atop a fortress, thirty stories tall, sculpted from the caverns themselves to fit the creature's silhouette.
"Hiding, shhe iss not," says Kalyani, "It lookss familiar, thhough."
"You'd think someone calling herself 'The Shadow Queen' would live somewhere more... subtle," says Maraja, "Any ideas, wizard?"
A magical pulse emits from Ling's location; as it moves forward, an invisible runic wall shimmers briefly ahead of the group. "I know that symbol," says Ling, "That's a 'false ward' alarm... ward."
L: I know it's a dumb name.
At Kalyani's insistence, Ling continues, "This ward does exactly one thing: alert its creator to any change. Unwelcome intruder? Alarm. Attempt to disable? Alarm. Warp past it? Alarm. Actually disable it? Ya guessed it: alarm. But," Ling raises her finger, "That's ALL it can do."
D: I don't get it. Why's it special? L: How do I put this? On top of alerting their creator, most wards try to do something to whoever trips them. J: Mindjack, teleport, incinerate. L: They're intended to go unnoticed until it's too late. J: They're meant to catch dumb thieves and animals. D: So, why use this one? J: Paranoia.
"Asssuming it'ss a perfect ssphere, whichh iss likely," says Kalyani, "Thhey will know we're coming, no matter what."
"Maraja," says Ling, stretching, "You stay here and, when you see your chance, get in that building. Save your mate."
"I'm not leaving you out here," says Maraja, "You have no idea who or what will come out of there."
"Hang back, dear," says Kalyani, "Make that call after they come forth."
Maraja nods her watery head and steps back into the tunnel; Ling and Kalyani race down the slope. Ling feels the hot sand between her toes and Kalyani carves a trail with her tail.
"A late realizzation," says Kalyani, "But iss thhat a tarrassque?"
"Trying not to think about that," says Ling.
"Do you thhink it died reccently?"
"Trying not to think about that."
"HALT!" calls out a raspy woman, when the duo are about a hundred meters from the tower.
"CEASE!" call out a gravelly man, immediately after.
Standing in a second floor, a pair of heavily armored bipeds. They're too far away for Ling to identify who or what they are.
"HOW'S YA GOING?" yells Ling, "WE'RE AS LOST AS A EUNUCH'S BALLS!"
"WHAT?" yells the woman wearing her shield on her right, "WE'RE NOT HOLDING ANY BALLS."
"WAIT," yells the man wearing his shield on his left. He then speaks to the woman beside him.
D: What did he say? L: I don't know; I wasn't going to cast spells where they could see me.
The two jump down, slowing down before landing. They then pose together. Ling can now clearly see the mace and scimitar the man and woman respectfully carry.
L: The rest of that day was relatively uneventful. We eventually found a place to camp. Maraja went straight to sleep while Kalyani and I... communed... about Vanessa. J: We don't need to hear about that, Mum. D: Sure is a lot of boring adult stuff in this story. L: One day you'll want to know about "boring adult stuff." J: Still don't, Mum.
Maraja took the second watch. She made no fuss about her companions; she would simply pretend that she hadn't noticed. Between the two of them, the spells and wardings would likely be enough without an actual guard, but Maraja couldn't allow herself to become complacent; she will not always be traveling with such magicians. She kept her ears open to the faint distant echoes: things burrowing, skittering, even flapping. While the earlier worm shocked her with its size, the fauna she's met since is small and mostly harmless.
Maraja kept eyeing the passages forward and back. While she had lost track of how far the group have traveled, she trusts Vanessa's eyes to guide them. If they kept following her, they'd find Kirono. The wizard was convinced that the paladins were dating. 'Insanity,' thinks Maraja, 'We're just friends and I'm not about to abandon her.' Her thoughts drift to and fro. 'We are friends, right?' she worries, 'It's not like those Vrow.'
L: Anyway, when we woke, Maraja was really distracted: deep in thought. But we got our things together and continued on. That day, we found a suspicious box. So naturally the first thing we did was make sure they wasn't anyone hiding nearby before we carefully approached it.
The iron chest has a single hinge and a simple lock. It appears tightly clamped and relatively clean. It is clearly out of place here, all three women know that; no one just leaves a container like this in the middle of a tunnel in plain (dark)sight. The real question is: what kind of trap is it?
"Bomb?" asks Kalyani, "Perhapss, a cursse or poisson?"
"It looks koboldic," says Ling, "So poison is most likely, if anything."
"Should we just ignore it?" asks Maraja, "Just raise a little wall around it?"
Kalyani points her staff at the chest. "Jusst give thhe word."
"Hold," Ling raises her hand. "If you see anything appear over the box, sink it down." She points at it and thinks loudly. An image of a dog 🐶 appears over it.
As commanded, Kalyani shapes the stone beneath the box to lower it down and cage it with forcefully formed stalagmites. For a second, she thinks it may have twitched.
"What manner of spell was that?" asks Maraja, "A dog?"
"That's a mimic, no doubt," says Ling, she looks at her armored friend, "Say something, mate?"
"Thhe sspell, dear," says Kalyani, "What wass thhat?"
"Oh that," laughs Ling, "That's my own invention; I call it Detect Consent. I think of something and the idea enters the target's mind then I get a reaction for if they're in favor, against, or unable."
"So what is 'dog'?" asks Maraja, leaning closer.
"Dog is non-sapient," says Ling, waving a few illusions for dramatic effect, "There's also 🧠 brainwashed, 🍾intoxicated, 👻 possessed, ⭐ cursed, 💤 unconch, and 🐣 minor. If none of those trigger, then it'll give a ✅ yes or 🚫 no."
"What about imposssible?" asks Kalyani, "And can you teachh me thhiss?"
"Impossible actions default to no," says Ling, "And I'd love to teach ya."
"So if that were a normal chest," asks Maraja as the group approach the trapped mimic, "It wouldn't have given any response?"
"Nailed it," Ling slaps Maraja's shoulder, "I just realized it'd out these b****rs."
D: Why did you make that spell? L: To keep kids from places they don't belong. Almost every bartender in Inner Glow ended up learning to cast that cantrip. J: And then it spread amongst travelers and drove non-sapient mimics into extinction. L: Can't say anyone's mourning those. J: The propagation of smart mimics that led to was disastrous.
"But the question remains," says Maraja, poking the mimic with her sword, "Where did this come from? Mimics hide near people."
"Sso people," says Kalyani, keeping her staff ready as she leads the group forward, "Musst be hiding near it."
L: As we traveled onward, we almost ran into a pair of Vrow huntresses. D: What's a Vrow? L: Cute elves from the Underdank. They're not as bad nowadays, but they were real bu- nasty back then.
A pair of violet-skinned elves sit in a high alcove, both young, barely out of school. One is dressed in traditional Vrow huntress attire: a black, leather leotard, thigh high boots, shoulder-length gloves, and a quiver of arrows strapped to her back. Dark grey belts hold the outfit up. Her velvet hair is in short ponytail.
L: Not that a Vrow would know what a pony is. D: I don't know what a pony is. J: It's a small horse. I could get you one. D: HHHHHUUUUU? OOOOOO?
The second (a sorceress, clearly) is adorned with what can be very generously described as dark grey armor. The chestplate is more comparable to a metal brassiere and it's matching bottom is a glorified, oversized belt. She's also wearing raised heel pumps. Under her armor, she wears an extremely thin tight dark silk garment with a spider web motif over most of her body, from finger and toe to neck. Thin metal rings on both ring fingers and around her neck hold it in place. Her long braided hair loops around her headpiece, which is akin to a circlet which matches her elaborate staff (also spider-themed).
J: We get it, they love spiders; it's their thing.
"Shooty and spelly in a ridge," says Ling, pointing up.
The adventuring trio hide behind a corner, they've spotted the Vrow first. How fortunate for them that the Vrow are distracted.
J: How did they not hear watergirl's clanking armor? L: Well, ya said to skip to the important bits. Sorry, that included us casting don't-get-caught spells, like Quiet March, and don't-fall-in-holes spells, like Darksight.
"How do we want to handle this?" asks Maraja, "Sneak up and attack? My range options aren't great."
"Hold on," says Ling, "We don't know if they're hostile."
"Thhey're Vrow, dear," says Kalyani, "Thhey will mosst ccertainly attack uss on ssight."
"No, they won-" Ling looks at the religious iconography of her party. "Well, yous, maybe. But look at them; those ladies aren't set to ambush anyone. F'ell, that spelly isn't even dressed for the cave; she's bound to twist an ankle." Ling motions for her companions to stay quiet as she casts a spell upon her bones.
The elves in the alcove sit oblivious to their observers. There's an awkward tension between them; Ling can taste it.
"Are you ready to talk about it?" asks the sorceress, rubbing the walking end of her staff along the drop from the alcove, "I don't know what else I can do."
"It's fine," says the huntress, refusing to make eye contact, "It's my fault, you didn't have to stay with me."
"I'm the one who twisted my ankle," says the sorceress, "So you missed a few shots; everyone has a bad day once in a while, Seònaid."
Seònaid rubs her head. "I'm going to get in so much trouble if I don't kill something." She shuts her eyes. "You know they've doubled the quotas, right? We might have to sell my father."
"Let me help," says the sorceress, "My family's well-off en-"
"I don't want your money, Oighrig," says Seònaid dejectedly, "I have to do this myself. I have to- I have to do something."
D: Couldn't you give her the giant worm you cooked. L: No, we had traveled several hours since then. If another critter hadn't eaten it then, another would've before the Vrow found it. J: The worms are also poisonous.
Oighrig struggles to speak. Ling can sense a desperate desire refusing to come out and casts another spell. Unseen to the elves, a magical bubble overtakes them.
"I love you." Oighrig clamps her hand over her mouth.
"I love you too," Seònaid chuckles and turns toward her, "Thank you. You're my best friend." She calmly loops her arms around and hugs Oighrig. "You al- We've always have each others back," she smiles, "And we always will."
Oighrig hesitantly puts her arms around Seònaid. "Y-y-yeah," she strains against an unseen force, "B-best friends."
Around the bend, Ling whispers to Kalyani, "Ya have anything to push these two? Hormones, music, shove her face in her boobs, something."
"Why- What?"
"I don't know," says Ling, "The mammals love boobs for some reason."
Oighrig suddenly kisses Seònaid, then stares into her eyes in shock.
"Wow," says Seònaid, "I was really down, but I'm so glad you're such a friend." She smiles widely.
"I. Want. You." Oighrig's eye twitches.
Seònaid nods. "To?"
J: How? L: I know. J: Vrow!? L: I know!
"Crikey," almost shouts Ling, "She's denser than b****y osmium. It'd be a piece of p**s for me to root a vejjo bunyip before this dropkick's jocks are off."
"Was that even elven?" asks Maraja.
Kalyani shrugs in equal bafflement. "While thhey're disstracted, we shhould leave."
"Right," says Ling, "I'm 'bout to snap."
L: Several hours of ups and downs and all arounds (mostly downs) later and we'd arrived at Hairy Scary Rock: a twenty meter tall stalagmite which stands in a massive chamber.
"That is an ugly rock, says Maraja, "Its shape is... yonic?"
"Stop gawking and keep moving," says Ling, "We can't stop here."
"Why?" asks Maraja, condensing vapor for her to drink, "What's here?"
"Stop using that spell," Ling pulls a bottle out of her little magic pouch, "Use this."
J: Always with the bottles, Mum. L: Hydration👏 is 👏 important!
"What's the harm?" Maraja continues using her spell almost spitefully. "And what's here?" she asks again, irate.
The ground begins to shake. Ling seethes, "Creatures that are drawn to changes in the air and water." The rumbling nears.
"Iss thhat a giant worm?" Kalyani readies her staff as the tremors intensify.
"Giant worm," Ling nods.
D: Giant worm!? L: Giant worm.
On command, the giant worm bursts from the ground. It's thick dark grey hide etched with purple scars. It is about twenty-four meters long and three meters wide. It's open maw spews forth purple goo which the trio scatter to dodge.
"Strewth, a purple-stuffy!" shouts Ling, "Watch it, that goop is highly basic."
D: What does basic mean? L: Usually it means it's slippery and can burn you very badly.
Maraja draws her sword and readies herself, as the beast slides along the ground. She dodges its maw as it lunges and cleaves her blade through its side. A mix of blood and goop bleeds from the writhing mass. She resists the urge to blast the slime away with water.
Kalyani dodges the worm's venomous stinger tail and fires a bolt of electricity into it. This barely phases it. "Any idea what it'ss weak to?" she asks.
"No idea," says Ling, pulling a tuning fork from her pouch, "But I got this!"
As the creature lunges at the wizard, she slaps it in the side of its face with the fork while rolling past it. The worm's jaw spasms and it begins convulsing.
L: I call that spell "Nervous Veer"; it disrupts the target's nervous system, redirecting body commands all over the place. Try to bend your arm and twist your foot instead.
Maraja runs forth and brings her blade down upon the creature's slack-jawed face. The creature brain oozes out of it's open head. The body continues to squirm about.
D: EEEWWW!
"Shhield your eyess," shouts Kalyani, as she lights the entire area it occupies in holy flames. "BURN! DIE! BEGONE!" In a blink, it's roasted. A bitter aroma fills the air.
In the calm, the trio reunite a safe distance from the corpse.
"Anyone harmed?" asks the priestess, "Do you need aid, dearss?"
"Clean as I came in."
"I'm fine, but- Gross, it's so sticky," says Maraja, using a cloth to wipe her sword clean. "Why was that thing here?"
"These are their breeding grounds," says Ling, preparing to rant.
Maraja began marching suddenly. "Let's get the hell out of here."
"F*****g right" says Ling, suddenly calm again, "We can roast your a**e later."
In total darkness, Ling drops Kalyani's bag and skitters off. "Hold on," she says, "I know it's around here." There's a tapping and creak. A dull light enters the chamber. Ling now stands by a small open door filled with glowing stones. "Great to see ya, again."
Maraja rolls her eyes, then turns her attention elsewhere. The chamber opens into three tunnels, but the small stone structure Ling stands beside has several metal pods attached to its sides. "What is that?"
"Just my current experiment," says Ling, "These pods contain different crops and the paneling shifts over time like the sun." She skitters up onto the building to a valve. "By turning this once a week, it keeps going 'round."
"Are thhosse dangerouss?" asks Kalyani, slithering away and roots through her bag.
"Defo!" says Ling, "With too many, anyway. Like standing in the sun." As Kalyani pulls a torch from her bag and lights it, Ling shuts her door and joins the duo in the center of the chamber. "So, who knows the way to go?"
"Her loving eyes will guide us," say Maraja. She fall to her knees and prays, "Dearest Vanessa, please, show us, on what path did Kirono head?"
A flaming eye suddenly appears in a tunnel and vanishes further in.
J: The gods did something? Hah. L: Two of her followers asked on a quest she assigned one to. J: ... L: We can talk about Vanessa later, Jevoi.
Ling licks her eyes. "South, toward Vrow territory."
"Oh, great," Kalyani shakes her head and takes out a staff, "The worshhiperss of Lmaoth." She conjures a new floating disc.
"Don't jinx it, mate," says Ling, hoisting the bag back on to it.
J: Can you just skip to the castle? L: What? But the purple-stuffed worm- and the tuning fork. D: I want to hear about the worm! J: Fine, just the interesting parts of spelunk. L: I'll do.
"She will protect us," says Maraja, standing, "She will protect us. Let us go forth!" She marches into the tunnel.
"Is this the way into the Underdank?" asks a tall, lanky knight in shining armor. Her voice is a shrill whisper, but upbeat. The green spiral symbol on her shield marks her as a follower of Freegh, the Goddess of Life.
Bobbobo the guard's eyes shift back into focus. At a glance, he may have mistaken her for a tallgoblin, but her large hooked nose and long skinny neck weren't like anyone he'd seen before. Her legs are more cat than goblin, too. Perhaps that is why he hadn't heard her approach. These thoughts occupy his mind for barely a second before he discards them. "Yes," he says, back to business, "Reason for leaving?"
M: She has a striking figure. She's as beautiful as she is kind. But she has a nasty habit of sneaking off, vanishing into darkness.
"I've been tasked with locating the Shadow Queen," says the knight, pumping her fist, "This is the closest entrance to her fortress... I think."
"Time to return, knight?" asks Bobbobo.
"I... hadn't thought about... that?" The knight turns around. "Do I need to know that?"
"No."
YL: Wait, I may have seen your mate.
M: You saw her? You met Kirono?
K: I thhink I did, too. Jusst briefly.
YL: Last week, yeah? Kee-RAW-naw? Cute name.
Before Kirono can speak, a bell rings out from within the dome behind the guard. He claps the fingers of his right hand against its palm, then slaps the dome. The magic barrier become translucent revealing the entrance to the Underdank. "Welcome back, Ling." He does not turn to face the gecko climbing out of the hole.
"G'day, Bob," says Ling, who looks up to the knight, "And ya too, sheila. Love to chat, but I've work to do." She races into the nearby building.
Kirono bends her neck ninety degrees and peers into the hole. She whistles. "That's... not the angle I was expecting."
"Four hundred metres straight down," recites Bobbobo, "The Township of Rankedge 'olds no responsibility for your safety. It is advised not to enter the Underdank." He eyes Kirono without turning his head. "Especially alone."
"I'll be fine," says Kirono, proudly, "I'm a wayang, I was born down there."
"Be careful down there," says Bobbobo.
Seeing the guards apathy, Kirono hesitates. "Maaaaaybe I should tell someone where I'm going first," she says, "Where's the... post office?"
M: I received a letter from her five days ago and- Oh, the ground. Thank you, both of you.
YL: No worries, mate.
K: Now, where shhould we sstart looking, dear?
Down into the darkness the party did travel, climbing down by hand. One of Kalyani's staves carried a spell that allowed Maraja to imitate Ling's natural climbing.
"Do you really do thhiss every week?" asks Kalyani, carrying her entire weight on her hands alone, "Care to ssay why, dear?"
"Plant research," says Ling, climbing slow enough to keep pace while also carrying the priestess' bag, "I'm experimenting with biolumies in the Cave."
"Bio loomies?" asks Kalyani.
"Rocks and shrooms that glow down there," says Ling, "Trying to find a way to farm in the dark."
"For what purposse?" asks Kalyani, "The food crississ issn't from lack of light."
J: It is odd that you started there. L: Well, it's all I could afford at the time.
"If food can grow in the Caves," answers Ling, "That's a reason to get those b*****ds down there to stop raiding other parts of the Glow."
"Iss thhat why you moved here?" asks Kalyani, "And from where?"
"From Ozzel," says Ling, "Went to Lemonbum's Wiz School. Thought my accent would make it obvy. Where ya from, Sister? Ya don't sound local either."
"Her eyess led me here from thhe cloudss of Shheshhaparvata," says Kalyani, her voice more melodic, "Every few yearss, I-"
"Breathhe, dear," says Kalyani, "Move one limb at a time."
The light from above suddenly ceases to be; Bobbobo had closed the dome.
J: Why didn't you have any light with you? L: Ya think seeing how far down it was would help? Or seeing the light be swallowed by the abyss? The temptation of looking down would've killed her. J: Point taken.
"Mate, panicking is just making ya slower," says Ling, "Which means ya're up here longer. I'd be bottomside already if I weren't watching ya. Remember why ya're here."
"Then I'll jump after ya," says Ling, "I'm a wizard; I've a spell to save ya."
"If I use it too soon, it won't work."
"Remember, what shhe ssaid yessterday," says Kalyani, "Disstractsion. Tell uss more about thhiss lady we're following."
"Okay, okay," says Maraja, trying to calm her breath, "I can... do that."
The two blessed women approach the house of Dr. Ling. The nagi priestess, Kalyani, wearing a leather jerkin and cloth shirt, and the undine champion, Maraja, clad in her armor, both carry the vertical eye icon of Vanessa; Kalyani's on a pendant and Maraja's on her shield.
"Are you sure this is the place?" asks Maraja at the sight of the windowless brick building, "And where is this hole?"
"Look at the ssign," says Kalyani as she points to the plaque by the door, "Food Wizzard; thhiss musst be herss."
Before they can knock, the door swings inward, "G'day, mates," says the gecko clad in dark leather armor and a new (equally ratty) wig, "Ready for the Hole?" She pats the small bag tied to the base of her tail. "Ya do have supplies, right?"
"Yess, dear," says Kalyani, who points to a large bag sitting on the floating disc behind her, "Tent, food, water, sspell sstavess, everythhing we'll need."
"Where's your's, wavey?" asks Ling, eyeing the champion.
"I'm so grateful that you are both taking this seriously," says Maraja, "But don't we have enough?"
L: Can you believe that? Sheila's on the quest unprepared, but the nun's ready in a day.
"Ya ever been to the Underdank?" asks Ling, "There's barely any water, the temperature alternates between extremes, and everything edible is poisonous, ravenous, and/or explosive."
"That-"
"And further on are the gravity waves and seismic shifts, so the whole thing can rearrange while you're down there."
"I unde-"
"And the b*****ds living there: orc barbarians, Vrow huntresses, dweorg slavers, kobold pranksters-"
"I GET IT!" shouts Maraja, "Everything is deadly and terrible, but I can make water." She raises her sword and says, "And I can handle monsters." She swings and points it. "If you can guide me through the caves."
L: I knew it was going to be a hard quest, this one.
"Sister," says Ling to Kalyani, "Anything to say?"
The priestess shakes her head and the two head toward a blue dome about fifty meters away. The champion races after them.
Stationed there stands a smallgoblin in blue leather. His gaze is unfocused as he chews on the end of a wooden stick, its tip alight. The sound of footsteps drags his attention back to reality. "'Ello, Ling," he says, dry.
J: Is that how Mr. Snarbly was back then? L: People tend to be happier not standing near a death pit for eight hours a day. J: I'm glad he quit then. You taking his job at least made someone's life better.
"G'day, Bob," says Ling, expectantly waiting for the guard to open the gate.
He grasps the twig between a pair of fingers. "Reason for leaving?" His voice remains unemotive.
"Right," says Ling, "Different today. On a rescue." She jerks her head toward Kalyani. "There with me."
"Morning, Bobbobo," says Kalyani, as Maraja catches up, "May we pass?"
"Time to return, Sister?" He returns the twig to his mouth.
"Dunno," says Ling, "Maybe days."
Bobbobo claps the fingers of his right hand against its palm, then slaps the dome. The magic barrier become translucent revealing a large hole in the ground with a twenty meter diameter. "Be careful down there."
D: Oh, that's the hole outside! L: Yeah, same one. D: What happened to the dome? L: No one's around to maintain it. J: No one's around to fall into it.
"That's the way in?" asks Maraja, "How far does that go?"
"Four hundred metres straight down," recites Bobbobo, "The Township of Rankedge 'olds no responsibility for your safety. It is advised not to enter the Underdank."
"How are we to go down that?" asks the woman in platemail.
Ling wiggles her exposed fingers and toes. "Well, I'm climbing," she says, "But you could ride that disc."
J: Please, tell me she tried that. L: Nah, smart enough to avoid it. J: Shame.
"I do have a few sspellss to sspare," says Kalyani, adjusting her gloves, "The shhrine had thesse sspider glovess in sstorage."
The smallgoblin blinks slowly. "When you return-"
"Ring the bell. I know," says Ling, "We do this every week, Bob."
As the pair begin healing Ling, she attempts to laugh only to cough up charred pieces of her tongue.
"You're a loon," says Maraja, channeling her energy into the roast gecko's chest, "Truly mad."
"Horrifying," says Kalyani, "Yet captivating." She holds the sides of Ling's head, forcing life through her.
"I'm number three," says Ling, weakly, "I am number three." Runes begin tearing open her burnt skin.
The champion runs her hand through her liquid hair and begins rubbing the nearest arm. "Why is that your focus?" She scraps and the skin peels away. "Do you have any idea how long a list that even is?"
"At least three," says Ling. Her voice returning, she yells a spell and a new leg erupts from the scorched stump. "Important rule for keeping patient's calm and out of pain: distraction. Think about anything else." Dr. Ling sits up with enough force to fling the rest of the dead skin off of her front.
"You're a doctor?" asks Kalyani, "I thhought you were jusst the town drunk."
Ling hops up and shakes the rest of her old self onto the floor. "Of biochemistry, but close enough," she says, naked as a hatchling, "Meet me at my place tomorrow morn." She begins running toward the door. "It's the brick house by the Hole."
L: Crazy that she vaporized my clothes. D: Why would she do that? L: Like I said, it was boring adult stuff. Don't mind it. D: But how does- J: Gods are weird, Dalini. They did things like that all the time.
"What's the hole?" asks Maraja.
"I believe shhe meant the entrancce to the Underdank," responds Kalyani, commanding a small wind with a gesture to blow the ashes out. "I can shhow you thhere. Do you need a placce to sstay for thhe night?"
The chamber for Vanessa is as white as the rest of the shrine, but with a splash of color upon the pulpit coming through the stained glass window depicting the goddess' most common appearance: six winged eyes encircling a larger one, all wreathed in golden flame and squished as if concealed by unseen eyelids. A stack of prayer mats are tucked in the corner by the door. The altar stands less than a meter in front of the pulpit; it's supports resemble a bed frame decorated with engravings of the goddess' eyes with inset jewels for their pupils.
As Maraja approaches the altar, Ling slips up to the pulpit and stares into the window. Maraja and Kalyani begin praying and the eyes of glass give a brief twinkle.
L: Weren't really listening to what they were saying. It didn't look like it was working anyway, so, after ten minutes or so, I joined in as respectfully as I could.
"Oi, ya heavenly b*****d!" yells Ling, "Your girls need your help. Get down here!"
Kalyani gasps in shock.
"Hold your tongue," says Maraja, "You can't act like that here."
L: Though, my wizardly ways were less than appreciated.
Ling pounds on palms onto the pulpit persistently. "Ya dumb b***c," she yells again, "We came to see you."
L: And maybe the drink had its say too.
The blessed women grab Ling and attempt to pull her from the room. She clings on, yelling at the window.
"Thhiss behaviour iss unaccceptable," says Kalyani, "You are more likely to incur divine wrathh thhan aid."
L: But it worked.
A bright light fills the room as the goddess Vanessa emerges from the glass, her eyes and wings shimmering and a weaving of colors spirals behind her.
L: I'll never forget what we first said to each other. I told her, "Your radiance is blinding."
"Hey, ya glowing c**t," shouts Ling, desperately covering her unblinking eyes with her hands, "The room's white as snow, ya drongo!"
L: I doubt any mortal's said anything like that to her.
J: You expect to believe she knew you already? L: Why wouldn't she? Of course, the Love Goddess'd heard of me. J: And you're proud of that? D: What are you talking about?
"Are ya going to help her or not?" asks Ling, her voice as flat as someone investigated by a blind elephant.
"I heard ya," says the wizard, "Ya can deal with me after ya help your champion rescue her girlfriend." She licks her eyes and resumes staring into the largest of Vanessa's.
Maraja resists correcting this statement, too afraid to speak in the presence of an angry god.
L: Angry's overselling it; irate, maybe?
L: It's an odd question, right? Took me a second to get it. Why wouldn't she just strike me down without being there?
"Ah, I see," says Ling, "This is a trial, right? Gods love trials. Ya already said ya knew me."
L: So we did a trial and I passed. D: What was the trial? L: Oh, uh, it was just some questions to prove... that I understood- understood... the concept of love. J: ... L: Shut up, Jevoi. That trial took several hours. Several long, glo- I mean, long, tedious hours.
The town of Rankedge's only shrine serves most gods, but the town's main patron, the smallgoblin war (and fire) god Shooty-quickly, is one of the few to have a statue. His depiction as a spry warrior stands atop the marble pyramid facing toward the hole into the Underdank. His drawn arrow's flame endures in any weather and serves as a beacon from anywhere in town. The other gods are depicted on stained glass windows on every tier of the structure, all with their own altar rooms. The structure is seven stories tall with two sets of doors on each and the grand stairway up them is flanked by ramps.
Ling leads Maraja up and into the complex's third floor and around a corner and around another corner and then, just to be different around a third corner.
L: I hadn't really been to the shrine before, so...
"Do you even know where you're going?" asks the bitter paladin as they pass the door she suspects they originally entered.
"Do ya?" snipes back the wizard, her attention stuck on the window of another open room they pass.
"I don't live here!" whisper-shouts Maraja, glancing about for parishioners.
L: It took a bit.
After wandering blindly for half an hour, the two finally meet a priestess who is reaffirming the magic runes giving the marble corridors their soft lighting.
L: The nagi was stretching herself to the ceiling so far that her tunic weren't covering those golden scales on her tail end. Her elven-esque skin was the same seductive shade too and that long braid of hair... oh, it was shaped like a smaller snake.
D: Was she one of your sleep friends, too? L: That's no- J: Sleep friends? You really haven't changed. L: That's not what it sounds like. We can talk about that later. J: Dalini, do Nana Ling's sleep friends ever sound like they're in pain? L: TALK! 👏 'BOUT! 👏 LATER!
"Hey, would ya know where the love room is?" asks Ling.
"She means the altar of Vanessa," quickly corrects Maraja.
"You're on the wrong floor, dearss," says the priestess, "Let me shhow you to the sstairss."
J: Why are you talking like that? Racist. L: It's how she talked. It's not racist, it's a lisp. J: Then, why are mocking her lisp?
The priestess leads them down around a corner and slithers up a ramp next to the stairs in the stairwell in the center of the shrine. The duo follow her up as quietly as they can with Maraja's armor clanking every step.
"The goddesss Vanesssa'ss altar iss on the fifthh floor," says the priestess gently, "Nexx time, you shhould enter from thhere."
"I'll be sure to remember that," says Maraja, "Sister...?"
"Kalyani," answers the nagi, "Priesstesss of Vanesssa, in fact."
"Sounds like I should be converting," mutters Ling to herself from behind the faithful as Maraja introduces them.
Sitting in a tavern, a gecko in a ratty wig sits alone at a booth in the rear. Dressed in a red shawl and leggings, she swirls her drink while watching the crowd hounding the flame-haired bartender. He pours, shakes, and passes drinks in an effortless dance.
L: It was a few months after I moved here to Rankedge. I's at Libby's having a pint.
J: Of course, you were. You were always at Libby's. So glad that place burned down.
L: How can ya say that? Weren't ya friends with Jr.?
J: Yes, and she hated working there. She didn't want to be saddled by her dead dad's dream.
Her wandering gaze is suddenly pulled by the sound of the door. A knight in shiny armor steps inside, looking about. The gecko slips out of her seat and sneaks across the tavern.
L: She looked like a scaly elf. A real beauty, too: skin blue like lapis and hair of water. Too soft in the face and too fancy a suit to have seen much action.
Ignored by most of the drinkers, the knight makes her way to the bounty board and attempts to pin her own parchment to it. "Come on," she says, "Get in there you... tack."
L: Naturally, I had to take a chance.
D: Were you always looking to help people, Nana Ling?
L: Y-yeah, I'd been helping everyone and their mum.
"Problem, mate?" asks the gecko, taking the page, "Going questabout, eh?" Her eyes dart back and forth from it and it's poster.
"Yes," says the knight, annoyed by the audacity, "But I have need of a guide into the Underdank." She looks the gecko over. "Doubt you'd be of any help."
L: The undine was in pursuit of her missing "roommate" from St. Chastity's. And ya know how the girls from there are.
J: St. Chastity's School for Lady Paladins?
L: The very same. Never been a straight lady in that building.
"Well, ya'd be wrong," says the gecko, "Name's Dr. Ling, local wizard and probo'solver." She hand the page back. "If your mate's up a gumtree, I can help. Ya got a name, lovely?"
"Maraja," says the knight, placing her fist over her heart, "Champion of Vanessa."
J: Vanessa? Really?
D: Who's that? Do you know her too?
L: I'm getting to that. Hold on.
"Champion? Then why ya looking for aid in a pub?" asks Ling, "We got a shrine up the way." She tilts her head at Marja's continued distrust. "At least let me show ya that far."
Maraja sighs, "Sure then." She shoves her paper into her bag. "Lead the way."
"You think I'll let you keep her in this hovel?" asks Jevoi, her eyes scanning the broken shelves and piles of refuse in the corners.
"As much as ya'd think I'd let ya take her to your fortress," says Ling.
"I'm willing to let YOU in," Jevoi's voice rises as small flames sparkle around her briefly, "I have a lab and a library."
"And I do not care."
Jevoi pauses. Her face slipping back into a smug malevolence. "There's also a pair of half-orc-"
"No."
"-Vrow twin-"
"NO."
"-Princess assassins-"
"n-n-no."
"-and their girlfriends are just dying to meet you."
The old lizard hissed and rasped. "Ya- ya- ya can't get me that easy." Ling pulls her hat down over her face.
"What else do you want?" Jevoi swings her arm into air. "Why would you rather live in trash?"
"This trash," seethes Ling, removing her hat, "Was your home. I spent half my life in this house and ya spent most of yours." She hops to her feet. "I built it. My life's work was done here." The room itself begins to shake. "Work ya destroyed."
Jevoi's eyes track Dalini, scurrying toward the back door. "Let's stay calm, Mum," she says, "We can still fix this. It's not too late. You don't know how many of your old friends are working for me now."
"Like who?" Ling scoffs, "Melandria? You think she's good for a brain?"
"She kept your old notes," says Jevoi, gesturing over to the glowing pod, "But there's so many others."
"Fine," says Ling, sitting down as the room stops shaking, "But first I need to tell ya 'bout how I met her."
"Why?" asks Jevoi.
"Story time!" shouts Dalini, racing back toward the fire.
"She's the first one to fund this," says Ling, "And we promised Dalini a yarn. So, sit down."
Jevoi summons an elaborate cushioned black throne to sit on; Dalini lies on the floor. "Oh, no," says the Empress, "Don't sit on the floor." She summons a matching stool which her daughter throws herself onto.
"Righto," says Ling, puffing up the fire, "Here's how I met the Shadow Queen."
"Do ya remember," asks Ling to Dalini, "What I told ya about the sun?"
"Yeah," says the little one, releasing her grip on the wizard's robe, "The sun used to shoot light of the hole in it: shoosh." She wiggles her arms in front of her. "And it span around and around: woooo woooo woooo." The older geckos watched her twirl about. "But you didn't say why it stopped," she said, pouting and no longer rotating.
"Should we tell her?" asks Ling, "Why doesn't the sun shine?"
Jevoi scowls. "Sure, let's tell her... exactly why. Let's tell her everything about that happened that day." Jevoi's face contorted into a wicked smile. "Let's not leave out a single detail."
Ling looked away. "Maybe it's too soon."
Dalini hopped around into Ling's view. "But you said-"
Ling raised her hand. "That story's too... long."
"Dalini," says Jevoi, "We can tell that story later, like after you come home." She cracks a little smile. "Do you know what a palace is?"
Dalini shakes her head.
"It's a big castle filled with all sorts of things. We can go there and you can meet your other mother, my wife. We can get you new clothes and your own room and anything you want to put in it."
Dalini's eyes sparkle in the light. She inhaled an audible gasp.
"She isn't going," says Ling, "Without me."
"Very w-"
"I'm not going, so rack off."
The wizard's daughter loosened her posture as she stared into the dark backroom. "Please, come out here," she says, her eyes aglow.
At the sound of shuffling behind the wizard, the old gecko sighs, "Fine, do it."
A smaller gecko in a ragged brown dress scurries quickly next to, and hides behind, the wizard. "Nana Ling," she whispers, "Who is that?"
"Don't act like ya weren't listening," says the wizard Ling, her focus still on her own daughter.
Said daughter takes a few steps forward, around the fire, and leans down. "I'm Jevoi, your mother," she says, smiling for the first time in months. "What's your name?"
The little gecko leans out from behind Ling and looks at her nana. Upon seeing a faint nod, she says, "Dalini. My name's Dalini."
"Dalini," Jevoi repeats, "What a beautiful name: Princess Dalini." Dalini tilts her head in confusion. In response, Jevoi stands tall again. "That's right," she says, "I am the Dead Sun Empress, ruler of the Inner Dark." She pauses, looking over her little doppelganger. "And that makes you-"
Ling scoffs. "Still trying to rename Inner Glow?"
"It hasn't glowed in eight years, Mum," says Jevoi, her eyes darting to the wizard's bone-infused hat rim which masks her.
"And whose fault is that, Jevoi?" asks Ling, leaning back so that Jevoi could see her face again, the face they share.