HP KAISER DAY‼️‼️ - Blog Posts

omg Kaiser in Harry Potter au is becoming my life 🩷🩷

Can we PLEASEEEE have a few headcanons about what it would be like for ravenclaw!reader to date slytherin!kaiser?

or just anything from this AU 😭😭 it’s so good

character ; michael kaiser || cw ; gn!reader, no pronouns used, slytherin!kaiser, ravenclaw!reader, hogwarts au, kaiser is pure-blood, reader is half-blood, aged-up characters

because of the fact he's such an emotionally constipated and idiotic person you guys do not end up dating until like... your very late twenties/early thirties. it takes him a horribly long time to even realize he's in love let alone the time it takes for him to say something.

but when he does, it comes out completely by accident. it's during the yule ball, where you and him are supervising the students and the same beauxbatons boy you had gone with all those years ago is back as one of their house's quidditch coach in the same manner that kaiser is. you and him are just catching up in a friendly manner but kaiser's at the side just quietly listening to the conversation.

it's rather hard for him to ignore the way julian loki, whose face is just so graced by age to kaiser's disdain, is looking at you. there's clearly something he wants to continue off from, and when he begins to ask if you'd like to catch up somewhere, kaiser drags you away mid-convo.

per usual, you and him break out into a verbal bicker, going back and forth on very redundant statements that seem to bring the conversation nowhere near and end because on your hand, you don't understand why kaiser's been so pissy lately and kaiser is trying his best to understand why he feels like this towards you. until something slips through by accident, his filter completely vanishing and his innermost thoughts taking reign.

so you and him are just staring at each other in complete shock just trying to digest what the hell he just said to you. you're wide-eyed, kaiser's got a hand over his mouth, a furious blush spreading over his face as he tries to come up with a shitty excuse to try and cover what he just said up, but it's kind of hard considering he did just say, "because he looks like he's in love with you like i am!"

he tries to leave the room, begging telling you to forget what just happened, until you drag him back in and demand him what he means. he tries to word it out, but since love has never really been a good thing to him and its concept was just as confusing as transfiguration theory, he ends up acting on instinct, grabbing your face and letting his lips that collide with yours so heavenly do the talking.

so hip hip hooray stupid pining idiot finally gets what he's been wanting from you after so many years everyone clap

obviously due to the fact that you're colleagues and staff, you need to hide your relationship. and since the students are so nosy, you really have to do your best to act natural around him, especially around the members of a particular hush-hushed club that advocates for yours and kaiser's relationship because they're much more keen than the average student—using any singular crumb that you and kaiser give them to feed their material.

but you find it to be rather difficult. kaiser has been pining and dwelling for you for how many years now??? so best believe he's going to be making up for those lost years and much and as often as possible. good luck, babe.

you'd be walking down a lone corridor, only to turn a corner and getting whipped around and suddenly finding his lips on yours as your back rests against a cold wall. he'd often come into your office hours unannounced, bothering and flirting with you as you graded papers with the door wide open. during meetings, he'd at first shuffle his foot to find yours. then he got more confident; he'd rub it up and down your leg trying to raise a reaction out of you.

it didn't help that kaiser knew how to apparate and you didn't. it's prohibited on hogwarts grounds, but in hogsmeade, which is also where you reside in a small cottage, best believe he'd teleport into your house unannounced if he wanted to see you.

weekends are nice; you and him are able to get away from hogwarts and actually can spend time as a couple, but regardless, you and him still have to tiptoe around just in case any staff that's also taken the liberty of leaving hogwarts for the weekend see you hanging around each other as well.

so, it's pretty hard to try and keep things under wraps. and kaiser clearly grows more impatient and needy. he gets bolder, too. he'd sometimes ask to "borrow you" mid-class just to make out with you in a broom closet for a hot two minutes, leaving you flustered and slightly messy haired to his delight or leave gifts and flowers on your office desk, only signing it off ambiguously with "♡, k." thankfully, you come earlier than your students usually, so you’re able to hide them beforehand.

some of the older students start to catch on—especially since up until recently, it was uncommon to see the two rival professors to be rather close in proximity with each other while pacing down hallways or talking to each other in a more mild manner than what they were used to seeing. is that smile on professor kaiser's face? the hell? does this mean that he'll be more lenient on newt exams?

the news of arch-rivals professor (l/n) and professor kaiser dating really start to amp up when a student had spotted you leaving kaiser's office in the late evening. the student thinks nothing of it at first, until kaiser escorts you out and gives you a small kiss on your forehead.

so it spreads like wildfire and eventually you and him crack and admit to the higher-ups that you and him are indeed in a relationship. cue the immense amount of paperwork that shoulders you and him. but hey, once it's done, everything is at least brought to the surface and there was no longer that stress of trying to hide your relationship.

the only con is that during classes, some of the students would get too cheeky and prod at you and him about your personal lives. "is it true that professor kaiser sleeps in a silk robe?!" "does professor (l/n) know you gamble at hogsmeade with the elves?" "i heard professor kaiser has a ten-step skincare routine, is that true, prof?"

valentine's day also turns out to be quite a stir; for some reason, students now think you and him are experts on love and come to each of you asking for relationship advice. young love, as amusing as it is, is just so very ignorant... especially since it took kaiser more than ten years to confess (maybe not the best person to go to for dating advice).

outside hogwarts, it's more tame. it takes a bit of convincing, but kaiser accompanies you to the muggle world when you visit your parents. he's been in the muggle world before and he found it much more dull than the wizarding world... until you reach your parents' home. suddenly, he's poking his head in every photo album that has a younger, tooth-gapped photos of you and twiddling with regular muggle items like a computer or a television remote.

"is the bread alive? why did it just jump?" he asks, brows furrowed at the freshly toasted bread in the toaster after he flinches at the movement.

"so is there like... a little man singing in this?" he inquires as you play him something from your radio.

"why can't you just let owls do it?" he questions while the mailman drops off the weekly post. "it'd be a lot faster."

you and your parents definitely earn a laugh out of a pure-blood wizard just being rather fascinated with every-day muggle items; especially since you remember kaiser taking naps in muggle studies when you and him were younger, it makes the experience a lot more interesting.