Dylan: Whatever. There's nothing to do, it's like... too old to trick or treat... and too young to die.
*at a Halloween party*
Kaitlyn: What is "C" for?
Jacob: C4 is a fucking explosive.
Kaitlyn: No, what is "c" for?
Jacob: ..."C" is for cock.
Kaitlyn: *facepalm* What's your costume?
Jacob: Cookie monster.
Kaitlyn: Now what is "c" for?
Jacob: Cookies.
Dylan: I fell into a trap. I went in for a kiss and now... he's got me! And he won't let me go!
Ryan: *spooning Dylan* You're mine.
Dylan: Yes I know but *tries to pull away* Eh!
Ryan: *pulls him back* Mine.
Dylan: Eh!
Ryan: Mine.
Dylan: Eh!
Ryan: Mine.
Dylan: *giving up* God dammit!
Dylan: You might wanna slow down.
Nick: *eating a brownie* It's cool! I have a high metabolism.
Dylan: Those are edibles-
Nick: I know. That's why I'm eating them.
Dylan: They're full of cannabis...
Nick: *pause* All of them?
Dylan: How many did you just eat?
Nick: *panting* 10?! 12?
Dylan: Oh. My God! THAT amount with your body weight?? ...You're fine. It's fine.
Nick: THEN WHY ARE YOU MAKING THAT FACE?!