Had a shocking revelation last night, maybe this insight will help somebody else. I don't know how to ask for what I want. It seems so silly and ridiculous in my head, just use your words just ask for what you want. I think it's been so beaten into me time and time again that what I want comes second to everybody else in my life. The world has often required me to be stronger than I am, and to make up for it I tell myself I don't need or want anything. To want is to burden another person with the expectation of fulfilling that want, and that's selfish and wrong no matter how small of a task it is. But maybe I'm past the point of needing to be strong. I think I might be the only one still fighting, and at this point I'm only fighting myself. I need to start asking for what I want, and trusting the people around me to fulfill that desire.