Kerejeandreil - Blog Posts

It's too cold outside, I wanna join their warm and cozy hugs :"

About how Kerejeandreils cope with their traumas

Jean often has nightmares on his bad days. When the boundaries of anxiety grow to an exorbitant size, he go to Jeremy.

Neil's triggers can be triggered by any little thing (words; sudden movements). Of course, he won't admit that he's not okay, but Andrew doesn't need to say anything. He himself will take Neil away from everyone, where they will smoke in silence.

Kev may not eat for weeks and lock himself in a room, but that doesn't mean the guys won't find a way to get to him. Their sunny boy just picks the lock, but no one comes in until Kevin himself lets them in.

That's how they find out that Jeremy didn't have a sweet life either. And even if his teenage riots and escapes from home are not the nightmare that the guys had to go through, his problem are not devalued.

Andrew never talks about his bad days. He is a defender, and it behooves him to be strong and not show weakness. This delusion, which he has convinced himself of, doesn't suit Knox, so Minyard can no longer ignore his condition.

Jean asks Andrew to teach him how to fight with knives. This is far from the best way to deal with trauma to rape, but Minyard agrees to help with the only condition: Jean will sign up for a session with Bee. If necessary, they will go to it together.

Neil's "I'm fine" eventually loses weight completely in their company. Everyone understands that this is utter nonsense.

One day, after a grueling interview, Kevin just finds Jeremy and lies with him in silence for several hours. He was tired. It infuriates him how journalists try to get into his personal life. He feels bad. But next to Jer, everything gets a little better.

Evenings Andrew barricades himself in the kitchen, devoting himself to cooking. Maybe it's stupid, but that's how he calms the demons in his head.

Neil, stepping over his fears, takes Jean by the hand, and runs his palm over his scars. He doesn't avoid touching, unlike Andrew, but this is also an important step forward. Especially after what happened in the Nest.

They're not fine, but it's okay. They overcome their demons together.

Kerejeandreil, Andrew's car and a little hot softness.

At first, by default, only Drew drives the Maserati (and sometimes Neil on the rights of the person who paid for this car).

The front seat next to the driver is forever Neil's. Andrew just won't get behind the wheel if Josten isn't around.

Kevin can be indignant and deny for a long time, but he likes to ride in the back seat between Jeremy and Jean.

But there were exceptions when he changed places with someone (like, for example, the time when Jean had a panic attack right on the way, and he wouldn't let anyone near him except Knox; or when Andrew nearly passed out after driving for too long and Neil was filling in for him).

Jean always sits by the window, because he likes to watch the passing landscapes.

One day Andrew lets Day take the keys to car.

"If something happens to the baby Mas, you will explain to Josten yourself why I need a new car!", Minyard squints his eyes, poking at him with his finger.

"I'll be fine," Day sighs. "I promise, okay? I'll return the car in one piece in the evening."

Jeremy asks Minyard to teach him how to drive a car.

Andrew initially refuses, but then decides to take a chance.

"That's enough, I've had enough", the car almost blows off at the turn, Andrew manages to grab the steering wheel at the last moment. "Get out of there."

This is the very moment when Knox almost flew into a pole, endangering their lives. Some people are just born to be pedestrians.

"I'm sorry," Knox whispers this an infinite number of times, and Andrew realizes that he is in state of shock .

"It's okay, baby," Andrew gently puts his palms on his cheeks, turning to himself after nonverbal consent. "No one was hurt."

No one except Andrew (and, probably, Neil) knows this.

They don't talk about this situation, but Knox's desire to get behind the wheel disappears completely.

They have Kevin instead of a navigator.

Jean is responsible for the music. Needless to say, French songs sound mostly from the radio?)

Andrew doesn't care about speed limits, so fines become an integral part of their existence.

It pisses Kevin off because he cares about their reputation.

Jean likes to sit on the hood, throwing back his head, and look at the stars.

Usually at such moments the guys lose Jean, but in the end everyone gathers at the car.

"Look, guys," Moreau pokes at a random piece of sky. "There's the constellation Cygnus."

"That's not," Kevin denies, climbing onto the hood next to Jean.

Kev ruffles the Frenchman's hair and then lays his head comfortably on his lap.

"Like kids," Andrew grumbles, wrapping his arms around Neil's waist.

Jeremy bends down and jokes in Jean's ear that they can repeat the very scene of Rose and Jack from Titanic.

Andrew assure that this is a bad idea.

"Well, when I caught you, you didn't look unhappy," Kevin laughs contagiously.

"Shut up, Day. It really brings little pleasure," Andrew rolls his eyes.

Neil nods, kissing Jean on the neck.

Moreau gives Neil more space, lazily turning around, than opens access to the protruding collarbones.

"In the movies it looks beautiful, but in fact there is too little space in car to make love," Neil agrees with Minyard, recalling their recent experiments in the car.

Jean groans strangled, throwing up his hands, and blindly finds the back of Josten's head, pulling him to himself.

They merge in a lingering kiss, and even Andrew, who can be surprised by little, sticks to this scene.

"Jesus," Jeremy hides his face in his hands, embarrassed. "Are you, guys, serious?"

"Ye-e-eah," Kev pulls him by the edge of his T-shirt to himself. "Or do you have something against, pretty boy?"

Jeremy thinks, that his boyfriends have no language filter (and no conscience either).

Andrew lights a cigarette, feeling that they will not be able to sleep that night.

A little bit about one of the nights "kerejeandreil"

Jeremy is only one among them who does not have nightmares at all, but he knows when they sneak up on his loved ones.

He doesn't sleep at night.

It's best not to approach Neil and Andrew in a dream, so Jeremy just waits for them to leave the room.

Jeremy smiles as he hands Andrew a mug of hot chocolate. Neil notices the bruises under his eyes and frowns. Drew finds out about it too, because they have no secrets from each other.

Andrew grumbles, "Are you sleeping at all?", falling on the next edge of the sofa. Jeremy waves him off, but Neil comes over and puts Jeremy's head on the pillow.

The quiet tread of footsteps breaks the silence that has arisen, and Andrew reflexively tenses up, preparing to defend his guys.

"C'est juste moi", Jean mutters, rolling the growling sounds of his native French on his tongue.

In the doorway, Neil notices Kevin, who slides towards them after Jean.

Andrew puts his finger to his lips, silently says them not to make noise.

Neil runs his fingers through Jeremy's dozing hair.

"He didn't sleep again?", Kevin asks quietly, placing his palms on the back of the sofa behind Andrew.

"Again?", Neil frowns, tossing his head.

Jean leaves and returns a couple of seconds later with a blanket, covering his boyfriend with it.

"Oh, you didn't know?", Moreau mutters confusedly. "We all have nightmares from time to time, and… mon soleil feels obliged to be around at such moments."

Andrew shakes his head disapprovingly, tucking the blanket under Jeremy's feet. It's such a small thing compared to what huge chunks of himself Knox tears off for their well-being.

Jeremy turns over in his sleep, getting comfortable, and Neil's hand freezes in his hair.

Kevin sits down on the floor at Neil's feet, intertwining his fingers with the Trojan.

Andrew pats his ankle reassuringly: "It's okay, go back to sleep, I'll look after them here."

Jean settles into the chair opposite, humming a French lullaby. At the sound of his voice, they all begin to feel sleepy.

"To bed?", asks Neil, looking sleepily at Drew.

Andrew looks down at Kevin, whose head is comfortably perched on the hip of their junkie, and it seems to Jean that a shadow of a sincere smile appears on Minyard's lips.

"Not today", Andrew says, planting a chaste kiss on Neil's cheek.

Neil shrugs and settles down next to Jeremy, trying not to disturb Kevin.

Jean hides his smile behind the spine of the book, intending to start reading from where he left off, but a hand in armbands pulls it out of his hands.

Jeremy, Neil and Kevin are already snuffling on the couch in an incomprehensible mess.

Andrew folds his arms over his chest, bowing his head: "It's time to go to sleep, Moreau."

Jean looks back at him, squinting: "A kiss before going to sleep?", Andrew looks down, clearly considering the offer, and Jean excitedly adds: "If you want, of course."

"That's acceptable to me", he nods, but he considers it necessary to clarify so as not to harm. "And for you? It's okay if you don't want to do it… after the Nest."

Jean hesitates, not finding what to say. Andrew doesn't often show such emotions to them, Neil knows him much better.

"I think… yes, I want you to kiss me. I trust you", Jean doesn't expect tenderness from him, but Andrew manages to surprise him in this aspect as well.

The way Andrew gently bends over him, crossing the border, remains forever in Jean's memory. "Still yes?"

The moment of intimacy with Andrew is especially precious, because this gesture means trust. "Always yes."

Andrew grins at him on the lips. "Hey, don't be a thief, that's Neil's phrase."

Waking up Jeremy tries not to breathe, watching the unfolding scene. When Andrew kisses Jean, he can't help but chuckle contentedly.

Jean's confused "good night" dissolves into silence.

Andrew returns to the sofa, encountering a contented look from a barely awake Knox: "Sleep, California boy."

Jeremy nods, closing his eyes again, but mentally makes a note to discuss what happened with his boyfriends in the morning.

I started looking into Kerejeandreil as a joke… it’s not a joke anymore