Kingmaker - Blog Posts

SO HAPPY FOR KINGMAKER!! And Im so so thrilled for Meg & everyone involved for hitting such a wicked milestone. There is so much love put into this show & from bts, u have no idea how much it is discussed and cherished...... This illustration is so very cute (& you all know how much I LOVE illusts). And if you didnt know I love illustration, well. YOU are DAFT!!!

Season three was bigger than ever, and that goes for download numbers as well! Thanks to everyone for helping us reach this incredible milestone. Season 4 is underway, and we've got a lot of fun stuff planned in the break!

Someone sucks the life out of someone in this episode (Literally??! Metaphorically!!?? YOU TELL ME)!!! All I can say is this episode DID NOT suck the life out of me, in fact it added 10000 yrs to my lifespan. So tense so fun SO GREAT and SO KILLER for a SEASON FINALE.

Now that the season is over I believe it is a great time for you Kingmakerians (and future kingmakerians) to catch up on the show... Perhaps listen for the first time.... Perhaps a relisten.... Third time's the charm... Perhaps you will... engage in such charm....

New episode out now!

Transcript link

Telesphore finally comes clean.

Content Warnings: drug use, needles, gore, cannibalism, sucking/slurping noises (32:13-32:20)

My cuteness aggression is so large for skullcrusher that Im going to skull crush her (affectionately)

It's Mantelope Monday!

Reblog this picture of Skullcrusher to have a picture of Skullcrusher on your blog.

Kingmaker finale – tis the end of season 3. It was so frightening dare I say it made me have to pee

^ Do you like my rhyme. Anyways. U know the dril(ling the kingmaker diamond out of Colette's head so I can use it for....... very sane and pacifical reasons....) My @kingmakerpod season 3 finale live reaction below.......

I love the Historian arguing with his editor (FOR FOUR DAYS). Who is his editor. I know it doesnt matter but I feel like the editor is someone the kingmaker fanbase should cling to and make headcanons for. The collaborative headcanon character of Kingmaker. The scp foundation collaborative headcanon character of Kingmaker

The music beneath Telesphore explaining things (after the intro music) IS SO GOOD Also the delivery on “You’ve got other neighbours, Colette. My people are just the only ones who’ve bothered to introduce ourselves” is fucking fantastic

Something that didnt make it into the episode but is written in the transcript was (after the line “It was my codename [Fox], for written correspondence”) “We all had them, and since we were Earth-based we used Earth animals” and I love that line so so much. I could’ve put two and two together w/o reading the transcript I suppose, but I just think thats cute…. that they specifically sought out earth animals to call themselves after

“EISEN: I mean this. You and me, the van, this whole enterprise. Are you still spying now? Has it been going on the whole time?” MY HEART IS BREAKING RIGHT NOW Oh Taqi…. great read…. Also that little “tap tap tap” after “I mean this” was such a great little touch

“NARRATOR: The first symptom of Mage’s Ruin poisoning is vertigo.” SCAARYY INTERJECTION BY THE HISTORIAN PLEASE GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE

“TELESPHORE: …you probably shouldn’t kiss me any time soon, either. | EISEN: I wasn’t planning on it, trust me” YEEOOOUCH IM SAD

TAQIS READS ARE FUCKING FABULOUS “(struggling to articulate) He’s just gonna- he’s…do you know what I mean? And it’s just hard, y’know- if he’s not gonna be–“ MY HEART IS BREAKING SO BAD FUCK YOU!!!

“TELESPHORE: No, she said ‘thank you in advance for the money’, and I didn’t respond in kind. There was no agreement, ergo, there is no deal.” AAAUGGHHHHH

Love this creaking in the bg whilst this scene is happening too Its so subtle yet adds so much to the environment

Ok found one of my new favorite line-sets in kingmaker history…. “TELESPHORE: I could never bring myself to disrespect a dish like that, Colette. Especially not with cyanide. It would totally ruin the flavour profile. | COLETTE: Not if it was an almond streusel, though.”

Timberwolf & The little crystal hybrid

“EISEN: Are you going to compensate us for the tickets, or do we have to fork up for those as well?” Love eisen so dearly

EISEN TINKERING MONTAGE OHMYGODDD THAT SOUNDED FUCKING AMAZING IN MY EARS HMGMY GOD I LISTENED AGAIN. THAT WAS THE COOLEST MOST BADASS THING EVER

I cant imagine actually drinking the dirty water of a mop bucket. I think id rather be poisoned w/ Mage’s Ruin than be forced to do that I gotta be honest

“I only say it because I love you” “(deadpan) thank you so much” LMFAO

its rondo I MEAN LIBERATO (only meg will understand this Hi Meg!!!)

I love this diabetic piano Holy fuck it doubles as both a fake movie soundtrack and a rlly good soundtrack to the actual episode. And the sound design flipping from the theater to the projection room. AND THE LITTLE HEAD WHIP ON “THERE” when Liberato turns Telesphore’s head

Sagas voice acting is fucking awesome I know ive said it before but. It is so good. Everyones performances are going so hard in this AAUGHH WHAT A GREAT FINALE & IM ONLY HALFWAY THRU. I DONT WANT IT TO END BUT IM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT

“COLETTE: Yeah, I’m at my limit.” as the kingmaker is pulsing I LOVE THE DELIVERY ON THIS LMFAOOO

I love Taqi’s little additionals like “Well well well” on the “Just as I expected” SO GOOD

ZANETTI. Also “EISEN: See this man? | CONCIERGE: The one who looks like he’s late to his own funeral? I don’t think I could miss him.” LMFAO AND “You’ve, uh, been very helpful” COLETTES FUCKING VOICE HELPP

HISTORIAN STOP CUTTING IN WITH THE FUCKING MAGES RUIN SYMPTOMS YOURE SCARING THE FUCK OUTTA ME IMGOING TO KILL HIM. IM GOING TO KILL HIM WITH MAGES RUIN. HIS KARMA

My heart is breaking I am. Going to kill I think. Saga is getting a big big dose of mages ruin too I think!!! FROM ME!!!

“SAGA: Maybe if I stall long enough, you’ll lose your sense of taste, too.” FUCK YOU

Im grinning because I know what happens and im waiting. Im waiting. It was so good thru text and Im anticipating… IM ANTICIPATING……

THEREEEEAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA TELESPHORE BLOODSPATTER DRINKING VAMPIRE MOMENT. THE COOLEST FUCKING DEATH IN KINGMAKER TO DATE I WILL NEVER. EVER. GET OVER THIS

Love how good neighbors die. I love death lore. Ughhh I LOVE THE FLOWERS GROWING IN HER WAKE its so COOL. AND WEARING BLOOD LILLIES! and the clock tower chiming in the background of all this AAUAGHHH ITS SO CINEMATIC

“COLETTE: The blood sucking was very…(clears throat) You’re lucky to have him, Eisen.” Love it

“But if you, dear listener, were to visit it for whatever reason, you would still be able to find a patch of strange and otherworldly flora growing where the hotel’s garden once was.” LOVE THIS EVEN MORE.

Oh my god what a great season finale. AAUGHH THE MUSIC AT THE VERY END TOO. Oh I love these more intense episodes… I love the shenanigans the trio can get into, and the plucky weird situations they traverse but like…. These intense episodes rlly bloom them. Oh my god. INSANEEE PERFORMANCES FROM EVERYONE. INSANE WRITING. INSANE EVERYTHING. I may not be mourning Saga (Fuck you saga) but I WILL be mourning Kingmaker until SEASON 4 IS HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SEASON FOUR NEEOWW!!!!!!! …. Patience is virtue. Patience is virtue….

I love taking what. 3 days to post things. 4 days to post things. My bad everyone. I will miss you kingmaker (until we meet again, s4)

My live reaction. Anyways you guys YOU ARE GOING TO LOOOOVE THE FINALE EPISODE Its fucking fantastic & worth the wait.... absence makes the heart grow fonder.... and in this particular instance more terrified because you are all Not Ready for the sheer amt of shit thats gonna GO DOWNNNNN!!!!!! Also Rondos Pizza

Season Three Blooper Reel

It's with deepest apologies that we announce episode 31 has been delayed until the 25th, so for now, please enjoy another fun round of outtakes!

There's also a new short story available for free on our Patreon to tide you over until next week.

Thanks so much for your patience!

Like Ive said.... it's the perfect time to start catching up on The Kingmaker Histories (as the season is coming to a close SOON)...... I am gonna be going thru withdrawal.... Listen to the show in my stead....)

Happy Saturday, friends! Welcome to

✨Fiction Podcast Self Promo Saturday!✨

I want to hear all about your audio drama related news!

If you have a podcast, a new episode, a crowdfunding campaign, casting call, or anything else audio drama related that you'd like to promote, reblog this post! I'll reblog every one I see throughout the day!

I also want to hear from folks who are planning on releasing a fiction podcast this year! I've created a page on my blog (here) which features audio dramas due to launch in 2025, which folks have told me about, or I've found information on. I'm updating and adding to this page throughout the year, and podcasts once launched will remain on the page for ease of discovery.

KINGMAKER LIVE REACTION TO EP30 days hath september... APRIL (we are in april) june and november.....

I LISTENED TO THE EPISODE LIKE A DAY OR TWO AGO But I have been so absolutely beat (JUST TIRED) that I have forgotten to talk to basically everyone within the past few days. Yet again what is new – I am chronically offline when it comes to texting That said, LIVE REACTION COMMENCE (I DONT WANT THE SEASON TO BE OVER SO SOON!!!!!! I NEED MORE KINGMAKER TO LIVE!!!!!!!!) Its the perfect time to catchup on kingmaker so please LISTEN TO KINGMAKER @kingmakerpod. SPOILERS BELOW

Love love love this opening scene I LOVE COLETTE AND EISENS RELATIONSHIP SO MUCH. Colette’s little “If you say so” SO VICIOUS!!!! LOVE HER!!!!! And also at 2:40 I rlly love the bells in the background. The very faint bells I JUST LOVE LITTLE AUDIO DETAILS LIKE THAT It makes the space feel so real (EDIT: YOU FUCKING GENIUS MEG YOU FUCKING GENIUS. THE BELLS HAVE A PAYOFF LATER WHEN FUCKING TELESPHORE MEETS W/ SAGA)

“EISEN: Telsie, did you see that? She almost fuckin’ killed me. I’ve never been more proud in my life- it was incredible! | TELESPHORE: Very impressive! Colette, if you're going to dismember Eisen, leave the hands and the face alone, would you? I'm quite partial to those.” Im going to cry I DONT WANT THIS TO BE THE SEASON FINALE IM GOING TO BE IN SO MUCH KINGMAKER WITHDRAWL. I NEED THEM IN MY LIFE AT ALL TIMES. They are simply drawing straws and Im losing my fucking mind because they are so great as a trio. They could do absolutely nothing and Id be waving pompoms around. I need the trio at every TRIO point of my day: MORNING NOON AND NIGHT!!! (THATS THREE!!!!!)

Colette loves back of house employment. Shes so me. LOVE THE DELIVERY ON “Is that from last year’s Parisian Elegance Fall/Winter catalogue?” SO SO CUTE. And I love Saga’s…. I mean JENNIFERS… voice actor (Ioana Adascalite) too, SO MUCH!!!

Also Eisen dealing w his pain via injury is rlly personally cathartic too “I thought I was close to full recovery, but man, after sparring with Colette earlier I am really feeling that bullet wound” I just rlly like this line. I feel this line (I have not been shot in a prison run but working at a bakery is the equivalent of that LET ME OUT)

I love gay people (I dont need to give you context you already know who Im talking about)

I love how sassy and grandstanding Colette has become over the past 3 seasons. Like w Eisen and Telesphore, she’s comfortable enuff to hold her own (just in a self assuring way) and I LOVE HER. She holds her own when she doesnt wanna deal w front of house work anymore. I fucking love you Colette. I love how everyone has gradually changed over the show which.... I know is integral to like…. writing characters..... but KINGMAKER DOES IT SO WELL!!!!!!!

“CUSTOMER: (from outside) Hey, are you open? | EISEN: Aye, would it kill you to give us a minute? Fucking prick…” ME TOO EISEN

THE NUN TICKLER

*”TAKING THAT AS A SIGN FROM GOD THAT I NEED TO STOP”* LMFAOO

“Oh no your fancy desk, oh no!!!!” SAGA PERFORMANCE IS OFF THE CHARTS

I FUCKING KNEW THE THANK YOUS BETWEEN TELESPHORE & SAGA WERE GONNA MEAN INDEBTMENT (is that a word I DONT FUCKING CARE I AM SO SMART AND WISE FUCK YOU!)

I needed that kiss between Telsie and Eisen so bad Thank you for quelling my anxiety. Because im fucking SCARED AGAIN!!!!!

AGAIN, THE FUCKING BELL TOWER IN THE DISTANCE AT THE BEGINNING OF THE EP AND THEN RETURNING WHEN TELESPHORE GOES TO MEET WITH SAGA IS SO CLEVER MEG. SO FUCKING BRILLIANT

“Are you still there?” “Yes. Sorry to keep you waiting for so long” AND THE ATMOSPHERIC SHIFT OF SAGA ENTERING IN-PERSON. FUCKING CHILLS MEG YOU ARE *THE* AUDIO ENGINEER *EVER*. I WENT BACK AND REPLAYED THIS PART AGAIN. SO SUBTLE AND SO GOOD

“Still too sentimental for headshots, I see” YEOOOWCH! FUCK YOU!!! ILL DO IT!!! ILL DO IT TO YOU SAGA!!! FUCK YOU! ILL GET YOU!!!!!!

Oh that silence after “As a spy” I shat. FUCK!!!! I NEED TO HEAR PT2 BUT I DONT WANT THE SEASON TO END!!!!!!

KINGMAKER EP29 LIVE REACT.... The trio may be teenytiny but my excitement is anything BUT!!!!!!

YOU KNOW THE DRILL MOTHERFUCKERS ITS @kingmakerpod KINGMAKER NATTTTTTT(ion) TIME...... How do I type out "Kingmaker Nat". If I was saying it verbally it'd be like "Kingmaker Naysh". Kingmaker Nat just sounds like Im saying Kingmaker Gnat (which, I suppose applies in this particular instance, because the trio are the size of gnats...... somewhat)..... BUT I DIGRESS. SPOILERS FOR THE KINGMAKER HISTORIES EP29 BELOW – THIS ONE ENTERS INTO MY ALLTIME FAV EPISODE SLOTS

“Telesphore tried to kill me once and all” “(sighs fondly) I did.” I love gay people

The sound design in every ep is rlly fantastic but this one particularly has my head in a grip for some reason….. In a very tight skull clench… So so good. Like for example the beard itching & the unfolding of blueprints, ITS SO IMMERSIVE – & off-topic but on topic, I missed these 3 dipshits. I love the juxt between the last ep (being so gravely serious and frightening) and this one (which primarily follows the main 3’s schemes once more)…. Kingmaker never misses….. (Unlike a certain ice mage from the last episode)……

SHORTSTACK EISEN!!!!!!!!!! (& TINY TELESPHORE. “TELESTWO. TELESTHREE.”)

“EISEN: Oh, aye, absolutely. I’ve made three prototypes from this design, and I’ve never had a single fatality…. I mean, of course, I’ve never tested it on a living subject either. | COLETTE AND TELESPHORE: WHAT? | EISEN: Brace yourselves!” THE TRIO IS SO QUIPY IN THIS EP… AGAIN THE VOICE ACTING GOES FUCKING METAL. Also “At last, Telsie, my love, we can see… eye to eye.” “I hate this.” The back-and-forths between all the charas are fucking brilliant. I love how this ep is paced dialogue-wise so soo dearly

Piggybacking off the last bulletpoint – ITS NOT JUST THE TRIO, ITS EVERYONE. IT’S EVERYONE WHO’S QUIPY & GIVING SUPREME PERFORMANCES (what’s new) BUT FOR REAL!!!!! Oh my god this ep is hitting so fucking hard I love these charas so much. The dialogue is great and the performances take it to the next level. They live and breathe…. they live & breathe…… As always Addison is killing it as my fav murder matriarch….. and Ben Rowe as Crowley. I love how hes got a magical Jack Horner-esque collection of freaky items. Is somebody gonna match my freak Is Is somebody gonna match my freak (Ariadne + Aleister, initials carved not on a tree but into someone’s corpse)

THE BONEDRINKER SHREWS 👹

“Did you drop this (paper) in a glass of water? Why does it look like that?” “A woman should be entitled to a few secrets” I wouldn’t be telling people about my naked paper eating pre-rat transformation habits either (only true kingmaker fans will understand this sentence). Good call girl

“Of course, god forbid a woman do anything without being called mad in those days.” “So she was sane?” “Oh no. Ha! No, not at all.” AMAZING DELIVERY BY ADDISON.

I love these two horrifically-evil-bodytwisting people flirting it up and then, from them, immediately shifting to a scene of three teensy people running from bonedrinking shrews & quipping abt how tiny they are. Oh how I love you kingmaker so so much. I need to make a sticker that says “Only In Kingmaker”, and when people ask, “What’s Only In Kingmaker. What do you mean”, I will tell them “You just have to listen. You just have to listen to it to be in-the-know… in on the lore….. the Teleslore....."

Stop me from saying this every 2 sentences (I WILL NEVER STOP!!!!!!) but this episode and specifically the performances are SUPREME!!!!!! Holy fuck EVERY EP BUILDS ON EACH OTHER, IT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER & BETTER. Everyone is embodying their characters on such a supreme level Oh my god. They’ve always been so genuine but u can tell everyone has just clicked into their roles like a snug glove. And this ep specifically is SO FUN, like a condensed adventure movie in the style of like….. Jumanji or the-like – I know that’s an odd comparison but I hope u readers understand what I mean; it’s so visual….. I can see it. & I LOVE the trio hearing Crowley and Ariadne thru the walls. And lastly (I’ll stop dumping paragraphs soon, IM SORRY IM JUST SO EXCITED BY THIS EP) but I think the og charas in this (i.e. the main trio & even Ariadne) are hitting so much harder because last EP was so geniusly written as to NOT HAVE THEM IN IT. Is genuisly a word. Fuck you I dont care AND despite being so much lighter than the last ep tone-wise, the story still fucking flows so well.... it doesn’t feel like it’s grinding to a halt just to engage in hijinks again AT ALL. SUPREME BALANCE. I love kingmaker so much Im going to explode into shrapnel for the 10000th TIME!!!

Colette’s “NO, EW, PUT IT BACK ON!!!!!” and Telesphore’s “Do you think if I jumped off this bookcase it would kill me” during the sex scene where Ariadne LITERALLY FUCKING STEALS CROWLEY’S HEART MADE ME LAUGH ALOUD “OUT OF ALL THE ROOMS THEY COULD’VE DONE THIS IN, UNBELIEVABLE MAN” EISEN’S REACTION IMFUCKIGN CRYING

THE TRANSCRIPT’S DIRECTION OF ARIADNE “(shaping out of the dom headspace)” HELPPP CROWLEY’S DELIVERY ON “STOP IT IM BEING SERIOUS” TOO. OK IMDONE I AM PHYSICALLY FUCKING LAUGHING ALOUD

“Were we just robbed by mice?” “No. Socialists” CALLBACK TO MY FAV LINE “Worse. Royalists”

ANTICHRISTMAS

GORILLA ARIADNE

THIS IS MY FAVORITE EPISODE EVER I SEE TINY LITTLE MINI PEOPLE AND I LOSE MY SHIT. THIS CHASE SCENE IS INCREDIBLE FROM THE WRITING TO PRODUCTION TO EVERYTHING INBETWEEN

27:58 THE SCOTTISH MUSIC SWELL HAD ME LOSING MY FUCKING SHIT W/ EISEN. FUCK OFFFFFF BEST FUCKING EPISODE CLIMAX EVER. THE MUSIC & THE SFX HAVE ME GRIPPING MY SKULL

I need a whimsical bonedrinker shrew pet NOW!!!!

“Who were those tiny people, and follow up question, are forearms supposed to bend in this direction” THE DELIVERIES IN THIS EP ARE OFF THE CHARTS and Colette’s little “Ohh fancy!” too, so cute

Gonna start referring to the Titanic as the Gigantic and when people ask me where I got that from, I’m just gonna say “Eisen”. Hold on Wait a minute Are you fucking telling me Eisen caused the FUCKING TITANIC

I LOOOOVE LOVE LOOOOVE ARIADNEY AND CROWLEY AS A DUO – this last scene rocks, but WHAT. THE. FUCK. CHORONZON IS FUCKING LIZ!?!?!?!?! I DIDNT EVEN RECOGNIZE HER HOLYFUCKING SHIT LIZ!??!?! LIZ!??!?!?!?!?!??! THIS IS THE COOLEST VOICE I THINK IVE HEARD IN ANYTHING *EVER* FUCK OFF. FUCK RIGHT OFF I LOVE YOU LIZ. I AM UR BIGGEST FAN LIZ.

FUCK OFFFFFFFFFF ANOTHER KINGMAKER EPIC EPISODE IMGONNA SHIT EXPLODE AND DIE 10000 TIMES AND THEN RESURRECT AND DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN. FUCKOFF

KINGMAKER in with the NEW EPISODE!!!!!! IN WITH THE NEW EPISODE!!!!

Oh You know what time it is!!!! Knocks on your door with a plate of oatmeal raisin cookies and smiles. Kingmaker Newest Episode live react time!!!!! (SPOILERS)

Oh you don't like oatmeal raisin cookies??!? Hrm. That is too bad. Perhaps my Ice Mage will have something to say about that. (You fucking die). Listen to @kingmakerpod or my Ice Mage will get you!!!

I need to start using the simile of “(blank) attracted (blank) like a flock of sheep attracts mantelopes” in my everyday vocabulary because A. Its funny and B. when people say What the fuck is a mantelope, Im going to say oh. Oh haven’t you heard??? Of Kingmaker??? And then I get them hooked on Kingmaker. My scheme

LEONIDS BACK, I LOVE YOU LEONID!!!! I LOVE HIM FACING UP AGAINST SOMEONE (HOLZMANN) WHO IS OF MORE THREAT THAN HE IS!!!!! “I KNOW MY RIGHTS!!!! I KNOW MY RIGHTS!!!!!” “Leonid, who as it turned out, did not know his rights” I grinned

MORETZ. MY FUCKING FAVORITE. I love announcing character names when they appear. Im introducing them at the door. SO MANY ANTAGONISTS IN ONE PLACE IN THIS EP, so fun. (Im scared). But Moretz you were always my favorite. Is this the infamous homoerotic scene that was discussed online/through DM. I will update in a few minutes. Update: “MY crime boss” Yeah this is it. Its already happening

DIETER 👹 And actually, fuck Moretz........ I have another evil person who’s name starts with an M that I love even more. (Its Margot. Its Margot). She steals the show for me

“You know, it pained me to sign your death certificate this morning.” “… I beg your pardon, sir?” WHAT A FUCKING HARD SET OF LINES. Also keep Telesphore’s name out of your mouth Kruger, I hope you get cinnamoned again. I HOPE YOU BLINK AGAIN!!!! LOSER OF STARING CONTESTS!!! FUCK YOU!!!!

“Holzmannisation” Fuck that word. Evil! ALSO. LEIPZIG PAUL IS BACK. “MORETZ: You’ll be luckier if you see us leave. Awfully drab little shop you’ve got here, Paul. Clearly your talents for Artifice don’t extend to interior design. Boys? Remodel the place. SOUND: Moretz’s boys start smashing up the shop.” Oh Moretz is so Camp. “I’m already doing you the kindness of redecorating. Don’t force me to paint the walls, too” HES SO CAMP

LOU SUTCLIFFE IS HERE. STACKED CAST. Sidenote, it’s so eerie not hearing the main 3 appear in this ep..... and that’s how I know shit is going down Real Bad in Kingmaker lore land...

Not the ice mage missing ☠️ …. Second time within a year I’ve said a relative “How did you miss”

Best. Fucking. Death Montage. In the world. I remember hearing a preview of this and absolutely going buckwild batshit. Off the charts..... OFF THE CHARTS!!!!!! THIS IS A MONTAGE FOR THE PORTFOLIO @ EVERYONE INVOLVED, Henry, Meg, VAs, EVERYONE!!!!! I could relisten to it 182107219 TIMES!!!!!

“I wouldn’t advise that, Herr Rothbart. I’m a very good shot.” (cocks gun) Oh.... a pit in my stomach formed. That line went hard

Dieter enrichment (Thank you artifeast for saying Dieter Enrichment, if ur reading this. I saw ur live reaction and it made me laugh. Ur energy for the show is infectious. THANK U FOR BEING SO SWEET ABT KINGMAKER, ALWAYS, everyone thinks u are so kind and encouraging and loves your art so so DEARLY!!!!!)

Iyer, Winterlich and Co. vs The Treasonous Three. This isn’t canon I just love their group-of-3 names and I think they should meet. (Too late, the latter is in a precarious situation. Aka Dead). Fuck. Holzmann’s arrival scared the shit out of me. He is so scary

“YOURE GOING TO TAKE US BACK TO THE FKA–“ “No, Labelle.” ✋ Love the sassy little delivery on No, Labelle.

“Perhaps someday we’ll live in a perfect utopia, populated by automatons under the command of a perfectly logical machine mind” Holzmann pro-generative AI.......... Oh he So Would Be.

IM FUCKING TERRIFIED OF THE WITCH KILLER. WOW! WHAT A CALMING END TO THIS EPISODE!!! THANK YOU!!!!! THANKS GUYS!!!!

KINGMAKER IS BACK AND SO AM I

Listened to the newest episode 3 times at work yesterday and dropped everything to write my reaction. Minimum wage = minimum effort......... but maximum effort for the Kingmaker Histories. Spoilers below for EP 27.... THERE'S MORE WAYS TO GO ON A TRIP THAN TO USE A VAN!!!!!!!!!

• LOOOVE Bradley Gareth AND Liz Morey's PERFORMANCES AS MARGO AND HOLZMANN SOOOO MUCH These characters are written so so so evil (love them!!! Just don’t want them to be real, THANK YOU!!!!) and their acting makes me shit myself. OBSESSED PER USHE w/ every performance in Kingmaker • One of the best openings in the show's history I’m sorry but Ariadne showing up bareass and then rapidly eating papers and then turning into a rat and then a bird and breaking a window is so fucking funny LOVE HER • “But!!! It’s my birthday!!!” Colette…. 🥺🎂🎂🎂 <- That’s her • “Leave. LEAVE FASTER” LMFAO • Telesphore’s “WHAT??!!! …. GIVE ME A MIRROR. Oh IM HIDEOUS” THE DELIVERY WAS SO FUNNY. I love Eisen and Colette giggling in the BG. I love these 3 so much there is so much funny real chemistry. How many times can I say I love Iyer Winterlich and Co. 1092728192727818 times. Infinity times. • Eisen’s startled “AAOUGH” BEFORE FINDING THE FINGER IN HIS POCKET GOT ME TOO • “Better make ur move or I’m gonna go become a nun or something”. Colette’s (heavy-quotes) “old” freak out…… She went to the beach that makes you old…. ALSO “I’m like an amoeba!” ALSO ALSO “All I’ve accomplished in the past 12 months is a whole lot of stealing a domestic terrorism!!!!” Technically an achievement Colette • When are we getting a full blown illust of Telesphore dressed up like rye bread • “The boxes they come in are really cute tho, can I look at it again” amazing delivery by Blythe yet again • SHE’S EXTREMELY CORRUPTIBLE! • THE DRUG TRIP AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN HAS TO BE ONE OF MY FAV PARTS OF THE EP before it all goes south…. Quite literally for Colette (Hell). The pink and the blue make an absolutely mental shade of purple 😈👾💜💟🚺🎆🍇 🌊 🌊 🌊 I would listen to a whole hour+ of the three of them just (positively) tripping out. Also the sfx go hard. I love listening to this w earbuds. If I tried the thimbledrops I’d let them trip sit me. Actually I wouldn’t let Colette trip sit me because she’d make me have a panic attack but Eisen and Telesphore would go hard. (Sorry gurl) Actually maybe just Telesphore. Yeah. Only Telesphore • “That he has to promoze— … that he has to propose to me” BEST DELIVERY. Also I LOVVVEEEE how “I feel weird” sounds. COLETTE FEELS WEIRD!!!!! • THE “IMPS/DEMONS CHORTLING AND MAKING FUN OF COLETTE” SCENE IS MY FAVORITE IM PREDICTABLE. I LOOOVE THEIR VOICES SO MUCH. “DEFINITELY HELL!!!!!!!!!!” 👹👹👹 • Dead But Not Really Telesphore. He is resting, he is at peace. He is being harassed by teenagers who carry razors and shaving cream for oddly-specific situations such as these. I love that he says “Oh, and it’s uneven” Telesphore I manifest a barber 💈 will give u a free haircut and trim next time you get high as a kite and look half-dead • MISKA 👹 • “Oh Colette dont be so modest” HI SATAN, AWESOME DELIVERY. Still love that his voice is her dads. Is this a safe space. Why’s he hot. I suppose it’s because he’s in hell. But also metaphorically. Colette’s demon dilf • “I thought I was a soufflé, and that any sudden noise would make me deflate” THIS TELESPHORE LINE IS THE FUNNIEST MOST TELESPHORE CODED LINE IN THE WORLD • Her 26th birthday was much less terrible 🥺🥺🥺 • I’m scared of Holzmann I WAS AT PEACE AND HAPPY W THE TRIO’S FUNNY RESOLUTION AND YOU RIP IT FROM UNDER ME!!!!! YOU LEAVE ME WITH HOLZMANN!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!

The Kingmaker Histories S3 EP5 I think this is the best episode in the entire world. (I mean it. The whole world. All 7 continents) The Kingmakingmecrazy Histories

WOW. Holy FUCK. THE NEW KINGMAKER. So incredibly tense and exciting and had me gripping my hair and pointing into the air and gave me QUITE THE SCARE (I am a poet). Supreme tension. Meg cooked a 3 course meal with this one and I am floored. THAT'S ALL I GOTTA SAY. LIVEREACTION & SPOILERS BELOW. I RLLY DO THINK (AND NO SHADE TO THE OTHER EPISODES), BUT THIS IS MY FAV OF ALL TIME THUS FAR. DAMN

Zuwie Kingmaker livereaction goes insane per the ushe.

Rip every minister in….. history • Love the sly way the actual cause of LaRoche’s TB is revealed thru Holzmann’s convo. So fun • “God be with you” “Tehehehe. If you say so”. Holzmann… Dare I say this was a bit camp • MARGO MY FAV • I was walking on my walking pad while listening to this episode and the footsteps of Margo and Holzmann synched up with mine for a solid 10 seconds and for a second it felt like I was walking alongside them. I was there in the scene. Just hanging out (Hi guys) • LOVE THIS SCHEME IYER, WINTERLICH AND CO GOT GOING THIS WEEK. THEY ARE SO FUCKING FUNNY I love them. This is my fav scheme to date I think. Prince of Belgium and the Nizam of Hyderabad. And the DOUBLE SWINDLE! And COLETTE SEWING WITHIN THE SCENE! I LOVE WHEN SHE SEWS! • “Her exact words were, in fact, I would rather lose my other arm.” Love Jenny. So happy she’s back. And MARIA’S BACK TOO. I love Colette trying to tell a joke and MMaria totally interrupting. THE DIALOGUE HERE FEELS SO NATURAL • EISEN AND HIS PAPER CARTOONS. Maria and Colette FLIRTATION. Eisen being a bisexual disaster via history with Jenny (this is tumblr I have to say “bisexual disaster”; its a legally required phrase). I love this scene so much. These four(Edit: THESE FIVE when Jenny joins the convo at the end of the episode) have such great chemistry, both in writing and in voice acting. Love Maria’s exit too AAUGHH THIS EP IS A FAV ALREADY. • “I think I’d rather that he stayed over there if ya dont mind” THE DELIVERY IS SO FUCKING FUNNY ON THIS LINE WHEN THE HOUND COMES IN • THE ROOM CLOSING IN IS SO FUCKING COOL. AN INTERROGATION ROOM ON STEROIDS BASICALLY. WHAT A COOL CHARACTER POWER. • The “rich” snooty banter between Eisen and Telesphore….. Oh my god they are supreme. Also 15:22 I need this Eisen laugh clipped. Yehehehe. It took me OUT • Ohh the tension of Colette meeting with Zanetti before hopping the train. No this is my new fav ep ever. EVER. Im on the edge of my seat • JENNY IS BACKKK “Eisen and Telesphore are in trouble.” “Of course they are. Water is wet. The sky is blue.” Real • “THE DOCTOR IS A WOMAN?!” “Mreh… more or less.” Supreme • “Yes. I have a brown appaloosa. She’s quite the seductress as horses go.” Only a line in Kingmaker. Only Kingmaker. Anyways. The delivery is so fucking funny • “I’m here on police business.” SCARY DELIVERY I ALSO JUMPED. The tension upon Zanetti entering. The room stretching. Oh my god I am stopping taking notes for a sec cause Im on the edge of my seat THIS EPISODE IS FUCKING TENSE AS HELL I THINK ITS MY NEW FAV • Ok. This episode IS my new fav. I stopped taking notes because the climax of this episode is fucking crazy I was so hooked the entire time. Meg you absolutely cooked with this one. Cooked the most fantastical meal. OH MY GOD!!!!! • “Iyer, Winterlich and Co would need to flee to a different part of Switzerland so no one would recognize them, and Jenny would have to go back to the VSR in case she got a callback” so funny of Jenny I love her. • But. But. Lastly of all. It was never answered. The question of the hour is: HOW DO YOU MAKE A COAT LAST!?!?!?!?!?!??!