Lonely - Blog Posts
The undead.
I live like a ghost. invisible and stuck to the corners and dim lit ways you never walk. observing without being seen or felt. as life unfolds around me, I burry the burden. this skeleton in my closet.
I'm a skilled individual. I am engaging, intelligent and even a little charismatic.
What I'm not is lucky. Rolling the dice a lot and getting a couple wins is not the same as getting those two wins on two rolls.
There are things I'm not going to do in this life. There are a great many things that life will make sure is just up that hill. Call me Sisyphus.
I don't know how to not try. It hurts when I do. It hurts when I don't.
Other people certain things just fall in there lap.
Yes I'm jealous. I want to have fun. I want love. I wish the universe was just indifferent to me instead of against me.
I know it's bad when I'm staring off into nothing, just letting YouTube or whatever keep playing and I waste a day and notice it's still early. I just want it to be over.
Quitting drugs.
Idk whats the saddest part or the hardest part to let go. Dwelling in past is never an option.. I will always try to be a better person than I was yesterday.
