Mayward - Blog Posts

JJ: Bro-

Pope : No, no, hold up, rewind.

Pope : My tongue was down your throat just a second ago and now you're calling me bro??

John B and Kiara: EW

JJ: Pope, you love me, right?

Pope : Normally I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere I won’t like.

Pope: We should get you to a doctor for a check up immediately. What if it happens again, and there isn't anyone around to help you? What if it's congenital? Oh my God! Was it me? Did I hurt you?

JJ: …You realize any other person that made their partner pass out in bed would simply feel really proud of themselves, right?

Pope: As top in this relationship, I think we should-

JJ: I can't believe you're pulling rank on me.

Pope, sweating: Tomorrow at 7. I'Il pick you up. Dress nice. *walks away*

JJ, a little flustered: Did he just ask me out on a date?

Sarah: I think it was more of a statement.

Kiara: More like a threat really.

*after the motorcycle incident*

Pope: Is the pain bad?

JJ: It's not that bad.

Pope: Don't lie to yourself.

JJ: I'm not lying to myself, i'm lying to you.

JJ: You know my motto: carpe diem, carpe noctem, carpe coles.

Pope: Seize the day, seize the night, what's the last one?

JJ: Seize the dick.

Kiara: oh my fucking god-

JJ: You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy.

Pope: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep.

JJ: I said within reason, Pope. How about I murder that guy?

Pope: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't?

JJ: Well, duh. What kind of question is that?

JJ: This date is boring!

Pope: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.

JJ: Then why did you invite me?

Pope: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Pope I'll do whatever want!

Pope: JJ, I need a favor.

JJ: I'm not giving you a lap dance again.

Sarah: A lap dance?

John B: AGAIN???

Cleo: hey where's Pope?

Kiara: I don't know, hold on. We'll find him, just look at JJ.

Cleo: *looking at JJ* Pope isn't with him though.

Kiara: just follow his line of sight.

Kiara & Cleo: *follows JJ’s eyes to See Pope standing across the room talking to someone else*

Cleo: oh my god-

Kiara: yeah, that works 90 percent of the time

JJ: Relationships should be 50/50. Pope cooks us dinner while I sit on the kitchen counter and look pretty.

Kiara: John B it's happening again

John B: what is?

Kiara, pointing at JJ and Pope eye fucking: that

John B: oh for fucks sake-

Pope: do you think you could take me?

JJ, way too quickly: yeah

JJ:

JJ: oh wait you mean in a fight

Pope:

JJ:

JJ, very drunk: Daaamn, hottie, do you come here often?

Pope: We live together, JJ.

Pope: Do you want to know your gay name?

JJ: My... my gay name?

Pope: Yeah, it's your first name-

JJ: Haha. Very funny Pope-

Pope: *gets down on one knee* And my last name.

JJ: Oh- oh my god.

Pope: Well, JJ and I finally did it!

The rest of the pogues: what the fu-

Pope: That's right... We kissed!

JJ: *facepalms*

Kiara: pay up bitches

Sarah, John B and Cleo: *hand over money*

Pope: you bet on us?!?

JJ: My hands are cold.

Pope : Here, let me hold them.

JJ: My lips are cold too.

Pope : *covers JJ’s mouth with his hand*

JJ, muffled: jokes on you, I’m into this

Pope : I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.

JJ: Wow. They sound stupid.

Pope : But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense.

JJ: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!”

Pope : I guess you’re right. Hey JJ, I love you.

JJ: See! Just say that!

Pope : Holy fucking shit.

JJ: If that flies over their head then, sorry Pope , but they're too dumb for you.

Pope : JJ.

Pope : I have feelings for you.

JJ: Why? What's wrong with you? Are you sure you're okay?

Pope , sweating: JJ, there’s something I need to ask you-

JJ: Finally! You’re proposing!

Pope : How’d you know?

JJ: Pope , you’ve dropped the ring five times during dinner.

JJ: I even picked it up once.

Pope : Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

JJ: Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Pope : ...

Pope : You mean ring bearER, right?

JJ: ...

Pope : Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

JJ: uh..

JJ, to Pope : We had a date!

JJ: *aggressively points to Hello Kitty Coloring Book*

JJ: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?

Pope : baby’s breath, why?

JJ: …

Pope : Were you going to get me flowers?

JJ:

Pope :

JJ: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

Pope, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?


JJ: *half asleep* Pope, this is a queen-sized bed. That means it’s for *gestures vaguely to himself* the Queen.

Kiara: I told JJ that every time he lies, his ears turn red

Sarah: what, why?

Kiara: watch

Kiara: JJ, do you have a crush on Pope?

JJ, covering his ears: no!

JJ: Popeeee

Pope:

JJ: popeeee c’mon I swear I won’t do it again

Pope, narrowing his eyes: fine

JJ: okay, what kind of magic do cows do?

Pope: what kind of magic, JJ

JJ, giggling: moodoo

Pope: I’m never talking to you again

Pope, a mix of drunk and stoned: if karma won’t fuck you, I will

JJ, equally as drunk and stoned: is that a pick up line or a threat?

Pope: both.

The rest of the pogues watching:

Kiara: they’re fucking hopeless