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Carbonated Cloth Currency Act of 1021
Preamble
Whereas the climate crisis is a threat to the survival of the human race,
Whereas carbon dioxide (hereafter CO2) is a major contributor to climate change,
Whereas the sovereign nation of Fabrica is committed to reducing its CO2 emissions in an exuberant and engaging manner that attracts citizen cooperation and compliance,
Whereas the sovereign nation of Fabrica upholds its fine tradition of craftsmanship in clothmaking colorfully embraced in every nook and corner of its streets, halls and dwellings and unparalleled anywhere outside its hidden universe,
Now, therefore, be it enacted by the Parliament of Fabrica as follows:
Section 1. Definitions
For the purposes of this Act:
"Currency" means any of the following: silken threads, linen linings, wool wovens, fabulous fabrics, tasseled tokens, striped scrip, embroidered notes, quilted quarters, or patchwork pennies.
"Counterfeit" means to make or to possess with intent to use or sell a counterfeit currency.
Section 2. Physical Characteristics of Currency
(1) All physical currency in Fabrica shall be made of nanolattice materials that have captured CO2 from the atmosphere.
(2) The physical characteristics of the different denominations of currency in Fabrica shall be as follows:
Silken threads are made from the finest silk and are woven into intricate patterns. They are about the size of a sewing thread. They are made up of bands of colors.
Linen linings are made from the finest linen and are woven into a simple weave. They are about the size of a postage stamp and are colored off-white.
Wool wovens are made from the finest wool and are woven into a simple weave. They are colored brown.
Fabulous fabrics are made from a variety of fabrics, including silk, linen, and wool. They are made up of a mix of colors.
Tasseled tokens are made from small pieces of fabric that are tied together with a tassel. They are made up of a mix of colors.
Striped scrip is made from small pieces of fabric that are striped in different colors. They are made up of a mix of colors.
Embroidered notes are made from small pieces of fabric that are embroidered with intricate designs. They are made up of a mix of colors.
Quilted quarters are made from small pieces of fabric that are quilted together in a square pattern. They are made up of a mix of colors.
Patchwork pennies are made from small pieces of fabric that are patched together in a random but consistent pattern. They are made up of a mix of colors.
(3) The government of Fabrica shall establish standards for the size, composition, and design of each denomination of currency. These standards shall ensure that the denomination of currency is durable and easy to identify. The government shall ensure that all denominations of currency meet their corresponding standards.
(4) Any currency that does not meet the physical characteristics in subsection (1), (2) or (3) is not legal tender.
Section 3. Denominations of Currency
The following shall be the denominations of currency and their relative worths in Fabrica:
Silken threads: 100 linen linings, 1,000 wool wovens, or 10,000 fabulous fabrics.
Linen linings: 10 wool wovens or 100 fabulous fabrics.
Wool wovens: 10 fabulous fabrics.
Fabulous fabrics: 10 tasseled tokens, 100 striped scrip, or 1,000 embroidered notes.
Tasseled tokens: 10 striped scrip or 100 embroidered notes.
Striped scrip: 10 embroidered notes.
Embroidered notes: 10 quilted quarters.
Quilted quarters: 10 patchwork pennies.
Patchwork pennies: Lowest denomination.
Section 4. Right to Issue Currency
(1) The right to issue currency shall be vested only in the Central Bank of Fabrica (hereafter Central Bank).
(2) The Central Bank shall issue currency in such quantities as it deems necessary to meet the needs of the economy.
(3) The Central Bank shall sell currency to the public at prices proportionate to the value of the CO2 capture that they represent.
(4) Only undefaced currency issued by the Central Bank and retaining all CO2 within is legal tender in Fabrica.
Section 5. Exchange of Currency
Currency may be exchanged for other denominations of currency at any bank or licensed currency exchange.
Section 6. Counterfeiting, Defacing and Destroying
It is an offense to counterfeit, deface or destroy currency. The following deterrents take into account both monetary and environmental implications of unauthorized acts to currency.
(1) Any person who counterfeits currency shall be punished by a fine of not more than 5,000 silken threads or imprisonment for not more than 5 years, or both.
(2) Notwithstanding subsection (1) and in lieu of the sentence therein, any person whose counterfeit currency is not made from CO2 shall be punished by a fine of not more than 10,000 silken threads or imprisonment for not more than 10 years, or both.
(3) Any person who defaces currency shall be punished by a fine of not more than one and a half times the sum of the value of the currency and the value of any CO2 released as a result of the defacement.
(4) Any person who destroys currency shall be punished by a fine of not more than thrice the value of the currency or imprisonment for not more than 2 years, or both.
Section 7. Severability
If any provision of this Act is held to be invalid, the remainder of this Act shall remain in full force and effect.
Section 8. Complementarity
This Act does not preclude the recognition of any intangible national currency to be issued, stored, processed, transferred and exchanged using analytical engines in the future.
Section 9. Effective Date
This Act shall take effect immediately.
Supplementary Note
Although this Act has not been inspired or influenced by any person or other sentient entity, real or imaginary, citizens may refer to the corpus kdrama laws – Abandon all logic, ye who enter here for astoundingly witty, exemplary lawmaking dating back to an era preceding the advent of generative analytical engine intelligence.
Passed by the Parliament of Fabrica on this day of 20.