Quoiromantic - Blog Posts
Bakugo icons (the trans one was for my friend)
So I made this because why not. It’s the quoiromantic pride flag.
yyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaasssssssssss!!!!!!!!
Quoiromanticism
Quoiromanticism is something that needs to be more known. From what I can tell, it’s a lot more common to be quoiromantic than people think.
Quoiromantic has multiple names other than quoiromantic, including WTFromantic, whatromantic, and there’s one that I’ll get into more later.
Quoiromantic is an inability or extreme difficulty telling the difference between romantic and platonic attraction.
How do you pronounce it?
It’s pronounced like “kwa” - romantic. “quoi” is french for “what”, and is pronounced “kwa”.
I really don’t like the term, what now?
There isn’t really another term for it (unless in a situation otherwise specified), so if the term is uncomfortable for you (just doesn’t feel right, don’t like the questiony implication, etc..) you could probably make a new one or just use arospec (aromantic spectrum) as your identity but the definition of quoiro as an explanation for your orientation.
I have {alexithymia/ASD/other neurodivergence} and I think thats why I can’t tell the difference. Am I still a valid quoiromantic?
Yes. Neurodivergence can affect identity and that’s still valid. It doesn’t matter if you wouldn’t be quoiromantic if you weren’t neurodivergent. You are neurodivergent. Now, there’s a term specifically for ND people that is similar to quoiromantic but with one thing added to the definition: inability or extreme difficulty telling the difference between romantic and platonic attraction due to neurodivergence. This word is Nebularomantic. This is easier for me to pronounce (quoi makes my mouth feel weird) which is part of why I like it so much.
I think I might be quoiromantic but I know I’m only attracted to {guys/girls/nb people/some combination}. How can I know that if I can’t tell the difference?
I know it’s weird, but orientations are weird and individual too. I’m quoiromantic and I know I’m gay. For me it’s because I can see myself with other guys and masculine nonbinary people, but not with girls or feminine nonbinary people (androgynous nonbinary people are kinda a coin toss). However, this is never person specific. It’s really weird.
So.. do quoiromantics just have ‘crushes’ on all their friends?
Well, it’s weird. There are various terms recommended for quoi “crushes”. The most common is “plush” but I find it kinda… :/ like it reminds me of kids toys and that seems kinda weird to me. One that was recommended was quoish (pronounced kwash) but it sounds kinda like crush anyway. I also saw quish (pronounced and spelled “squish” without the “s”) and that one seems pretty good to me. Also, no. Some quoiromantics can’t even tell if they experience romantic attraction or just have really strong “friend crushes” (a “squish”). We often get confused on whether or not we have crushes on all our friends. I always use outside variables. Not on how I feel about them, but more on ‘there are these that disqualify someone from me being in a romantic relationship with them’ (see ‘how can i tell im only attracted to {guys/girls/nb people/some combination}).
I saw something about how quoiromantic isn’t an orientation but just a modifier?
People who say this are the ones who say “you can be quoiromantic and arospec but it doesn’t make you arospec”. What they mean is “Must be This Sure to be Arospec™”. And it’s really just like “ok thanks! me, who cant tell the difference between romantic and platonic attraction, will just! check if I experience romantic attraction!” You can be quoiromantic and not consider yourself arospec (just like nonbinary people can consider themselves not trans). Quoiromantic is an arospec identity in the same way as nonbinary is a trans identity. Because of it, you are included unless otherwise specified.
Gender
So, this is hard to explain.......
What would you feel like if someone called you, he?
What would you feel like if someone called you, she?
What would you feel like if someone called you, they or anything else?
Do you feel happy, sad? I feel the same thing for all the above.
And it scares me, am I genderfluid, nonbinary? I simply do not know.
I think I’m Quoiromantic, and if I’m right about what it means then maybe I’m quoigender as well. But I don’t know, yes it scares me but it’s okay.
It’s okay.
gender: yes but also no but also depends but also multiple but also online but also i dont give a fuck but also STARSSS but also i dont know but also depends on music
sexuality: depends i guess. also multiple maybe?
romantic attraction: mostly no but maybe but depends. Also sexual attraction? Fuck NO
tags: i dont know i dont have friends and the only person i can think of was the one who tagged Me soo
Gender, Sexuality, Romantic Attraction Tagging Game
How do: You put your gender, sexuality, and romantic attraction down with a line break between them—but, here's the catch, don't use any labels! So, for example, this, "Gender? Agender Sexuality? Lesbian Romantic Attraction? Demiromantic" would be this: "Gender? I hardly know 'er! Sexuality? Girl-kisser Romantic Attraction? My friends, I think"
So, here's mine!
Gender? Yours, fool Sexuality? Yes Romantic Attraction? Only if I know you well enough
TAGS (under the cut, and don't feel obligated to do it!) (and obviously those who I have not tagged can participate too)
@bassguitarinablackt-shirt @gloriousvermin @midnight-thedyke @littlebookworm69 @runwiththerain @cybercerealkiller @ishouldsleepbut @ssavinggrace @i-love-your-father @us-costco-official @scifikode @i-am-an-arson-enthusiast
All about me thingy
i'm quoiromantic, because i know i don't really feel romantic attraction the same amount as the average person, but i also know that i couldn't tell you the difference between platonic and romantic affection/attraction if you were to ask me.
It's so weird that I finally realized I'm quoiromantic. I always knew, but I didn't know. I've never really been able to tell the difference in romantic and platonic feelings, but I sort of thought it was normal. I've always just said I like a random friend and convinced myself that it was true. In my whole life I have only actually liked 4 people, one of them I didn't realize was a crush until way after, 2 of them I started liking after we started dating, and the other one is my current boyfriend, he's the only one I've actually been sure about since I met them. It's weird though, I've never felt this way before, but when I told him about it all he said was "oh sweetie, I know." He seems to know before anybody else does, even me, he just lets me figure it out on my own time, and honestly, I'm so grateful for it. I've told so many people that I love them, but I think I really mean it when I tell him I love him. I feel weird about it though, it seems like we're too young to actually know what love is, but I feel like after so long of not knowing if I feel love in that way at all, I think I'm pretty sure. Which means I'm just somewhere on the spectrum, I'm not sure if I actually like people in that way, but there's occasionally one person that I'm sure about, and I'm so glad that I happened to fall in love with my boyfriend, because I wouldn't trade him for anything.
"I want to love you to the best of my abilities, but I don't even know if I can love people in that way"
Sam Martinez (me!!), 07/21/24