Ref - Blog Posts
Resources For Describing Emotion
Emotions
Without Making Your Character Feel Too Self Aware
Showing Emotion Without Telling About It
Emotions Associated With Body Language
Telling Readers What The Character Doesn’t Want To Show
Hiding Emotions
Expressing Cardinal Emotions: Masculine vs. Feminine
Writing Extreme Emotion Without Melodrama
Specific Emotions
Conveying Shock
Conveying Embarrassment
Conveying Disappointment
Conveying Love/Attraction
Conveying Annoyance
Conveying Relief
Conveying Uncertainty
Conveying Impatience
Conveying Shame
Conveying Resentment
Conveying Panic
Conveying Guilt
Conveying Desperation
Conveying Sarcasm & Verbal Disrespect
Conveying Confusion
Conveying Stubbornness
Conveying Frustration
Conveying Indifference
Conveying Indignation
Conveying Confidence & Pride
Conveying Smugness
Conveying Enthusiasm
Conveying Curiosity
Conveying Hopefulness
Conveying Unease
Conveying Reluctance
Conveying Worry
Conveying Humility & Meekness
Conveying Happiness & Joy
Conveying Amusement
Conveying Disgust
Conveying Resignation
Conveying Jealousy
Conveying Anticipation
Conveying Contentment
Conveying Defeat
Conveying Excitement
Conveying Fear
Conveying Hatred
Conveying Hurt
Conveying Being Overwhelmed
Conveying Sadness & Grief
Conveying Satisfaction
Conveying Somberness
Conveying Sympathy & Empathy
Conveying Wariness
Conveying Defensiveness
Conveying Desire
Conveying Doubt
Conveying Energy
Conveying Exhaustion
Conveying Hunger
Conveying Loneliness
Conveying Physical Pain
Emotional Wounds
A Role Model Who Disappoints
A Sibling’s Betrayal
A Speech Impediment
Becoming a Caregiver at an Early Age
Being Bullied
Being Fired or Laid Off
Being Held Captive
Being Mugged
Being Publicly Humiliated
Being Raised by Neglectful Parents
Being Raised by Overprotective Parents
Being So Beautiful It’s All People See
Being the Victim of a Vicious Rumor
Being Stalked
Being Trapped in a Collapsed Building
Being Unfairly Blamed For The Death of Another
Childhood Sexual Abuse (by a family member or known person)
Discovering One’s Parent is a Monster
Discovering One’s Sibling was Abused
Experiencing a Miscarriage or Stillbirth
Failing At School
Failing To Do The Right Thing
Financial Ruin Due To A Spouse’s Irresponsibility
Finding Out One’s Child Was Abused
Finding Out One Was Adopted
Getting Lost In a Natural Environment
Growing Up In A Cult
Growing Up in a Dangerous Neighborhood
Growing Up In Foster Care
Growing Up In The Public Eye
Growing Up In The Shadow of a Successful Sibling
Growing Up with a Sibling Who Has a Chronic Disability or Illness
Having Parents Who Favored One Child Over Another
Having To Kill Another Person To Survive
Infertility
Infidelity (emotional or physical)
Losing a Limb
Losing a Loved One To A Random Act of Violence
Making a Very Public Mistake
Overly Critical or Strict Parents
Physical Disfigurement
Rejection By One’s Peers
Telling The Truth But Not Being Believed
The Death of a Child On One’s Watch
Victimization via Identity Theft
Watching A Loved One Die
Wrongful Imprisonment
Spending Time In Jail
Suffering From a Learning Disability
Motivation
Achieving Spiritual Enlightenment
Avoiding Certain Death
Avoiding Financial Ruin
Beating a Diagnosis or Condition
Being Acknowledged and Appreciated by Family
Being a Leader of Others
Being the Best At Something
Caring for an Aging Parent
Carrying on a Legacy
Catching The Bad Guy or Girl
Coming To Grips With Mental Illness
Discovering One’s True Self
Escaping a Dangerous Life one Doesn’t Want
Escaping a Killer
Escaping a Widespread Disaster
Escaping Confinement
Escaping Homelessness
Escaping Invaders
Finding Friendship or Companionship
Finding a Lifelong Partner
Having a Child
Helping a Loved One See They Are Hurting Themselves and Others
Obtaining Shelter From The Elements
Overcoming Abuse and Learning To Trust
Overcoming Addiction
Protecting One’s Home or Property
Pursuing Justice For Oneself or Others
Realizing a Dream
Reconciling with an Estranged Family Member
Rescuing a Loved One From a Captor
Restoring A Name or Reputation
Righting a Deep Wrong
Seeking Out One’s Biological Roots
Stopping an Event From Happening
Trying Again When One Has Previously Failed
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Writing Tip June 4th
A list of body language phrases.
I’ve included a very comprehensive list, organized by the type of body movement, hand and arm movements, facial expressions etc. In some cases, a phrase fits more than one heading, so it may appear twice. Possible emotions are given after each BL phrase unless the emotion is indicated within the phrase. (They are underlined for emphasis, not due to a hyperlink.)
Note: I’ve included a few body postures and body conditions as they are non-verbal testimony to the character’s physical condition.
Have fun and generate your own ideas.:-)
Eyes, Brows and Forehead
arched a sly brow: sly, haughty
blinked owlishly: just waking, focusing, needs glasses
brows bumped together in a scowl: worried, disapproving, irritated
brows knitted in a frown: worried, disapproval, thoughtful
bug-eyed: surprised, fear, horror
cocky wink and confident smile: over confidence, arrogant, good humor, sexy humor
eyes burned with hatred: besides hatred this might suggest maniacal feelings
eyes flashed: fury, defiance, lust, promise, seduction
eyes rolled skyward: disbelief, distrust, humor
forehead puckered: thoughtful, worried, irritation
frustration crinkled her eyes
gaze dipped to her décolletage: sexual interest, attraction, lust
gimlet-eyed/narrowed eyes: irritation, thoughtful, mean, angry
gleam of deviltry: humor, conniving, cunning
kept eye contact but her gaze became glazed: pretending interest where there is none/bordom
narrowed to crinkled slits: angry, distrust
nystagmic eyes missed nothing (constantly shifting eyes): Shifty
pupils dilated: interested, attraction to opposite sex, fear
raked her with freezing contempt
slammed his eyes shut: stunned, furious, pain
squinted in a furtive manner: fearful, sneaky
stared with cow eyes: surprised, disbelief, hopeful, lovestruck
subtle wink: sexy, humor/sharing a joke, sarcasm
unrelenting stare: distrust, demanding, high interest, unyielding
Place To Place, Stationary Or Posture
ambled away: relaxed, lazy
barged ahead: rude, hurried
battled his way through the melee: desperate, anger, alarm
cruised into the diner: easy-going, feeling dapper, confident
dawdled alongside the road: lazy, deliberate delay for motives, unhurried, relaxed
dragged his blanket in the dirt: sadness/depressed, weary
edged closer to him: sneaky, seeking comfort, seeking protection, seeking an audience
he stood straighter and straightened his tie: sudden interest, sexual attraction
held his crotch and danced a frantic jig: demonstrates physical condition – he has to pee
hips rolled and undulated: sexy walk, exaggerating for sex appeal
hovered over them with malice/like a threatening storm: here it’s malice, but one may hover for many reasons.
hunched over to look shorter: appear inconspicuous, ashamed of actions, ashamed of height
leaped into action feet hammering the marbled floor: eager, fear, joyous
long-legged strides: hurried, impatient
lumbered across: heavy steps of a big man in a hurry
minced her way up to him: timid, sneaky, insecure, dainty or pretense at dainty
paced/prowled the halls: worried, worried impatience, impatient, diligently seeking pivoted on his heel and took off: mistaken and changes direction, following orders, hurried, abrupt change of mind, angry retreat
plodded down the road: unhurried, burdened, reluctant
practiced sensual stroll: sexy, showing off
rammed her bare foot into her jeans: angry, rushed
rocked back and forth on his heels: thoughtful, impatiently waiting
sagged against the wall: exhausted, disappointment
sallied forth: confident, determined
sashayed her cute little fanny: confident, determined, angered and determined
shrank into the angry crowd: fear, insecure, seeking to elude
sketched a brief bow and assumed a regal pose: confident, mocking, snooty, arrogant skidded to an abrupt halt: change of heart, fear, surprise, shock
skulked on the edges of the crowd: sneaky, ashamed, timid
slithered through the door: sneaky, evil, bad intentions
stormed toward her, pulling up short when: anger with a sudden surprise
swaggered into the class room: over confident, proud, arrogant, conceited
tall erect posture: confidence, military bearing
toe tapped a staccato rhythm: impatience, irritation
tottered/staggered unsteadily then keeled over: drunk, drugged, aged, ill
waltzed across the floor: happy, blissful, exuberant, conceited, arrogant
Head Movement
cocked his head: curiosity, smart-alecky, wondering, thoughtful
cocked his head left and rolled his eyes to right corner of the ceiling: introspection
droop of his head: depressed, downcast, hiding true feelings
nodded vigorously: eager
tilted her head to one side while listening: extreme interest, possibly sexual interest
Mouth And Jaw
a lackluster smile: feigning cheerfulness
cigarette hung immobile in mouth: shock, lazy, uncaring, relaxed casualness
clinched his jaw at the sight: angered, worried, surprised
curled her lips with icy contempt
expelled her breath in a whose: relief, disappointment
gagged at the smell: disgust, distaste
gapped mouth stare: surprised, shock, disbelief
gritted his teeth: anger, irritation, holding back opinion
inhaled a sharp breath: surprise, shock, fear, horror
licked her lips: nervous, sexual attraction
lips primed: affronted, upset, insulted
lips pursed for a juicy kiss
lips pursed like she’d been chewing a lemon rind: dislike, angry, irritated, sarcasm
lips screwed into: irritation, anger, grimace, scorn
lips set in a grim line: sorrow, worried, fear of the worst
pursed her lips: perturbed, waiting for a kiss
scarfed down the last biscuit: physical hunger, greed
slack-mouthed: total shock, disbelief
slow and sexy smile: attraction, seductive, coy
smacked his lips: anticipation
smile congealed then melted into horror
smile dangled on the corner of his lips: cocky, sexy
smirked and tossed her hair over her shoulder: conceit, sarcasm, over confident
sneered and flicked lint off his suit: sarcasm, conceit
spewed water and spit: shock
stuck out her tongue: humor, sarcasm, teasing, childish
toothy smile: eagerness, hopeful
wary smile surfaced on her lips
Nose
nose wrinkled in distaste/at the aroma
nostrils flared: anger, sexual attraction
nose in the air: snooty, haughty
Face in General
crimson with fury
handed it over shame-faced
jutted his chin: confident, anger, forceful
managed a deadpan expression: expressionless
muscles in her face tightened: unsmiling, concealing emotions, anger, worried
rested his chin in his palm and looked thoughtful
rubbed a hand over his dark stubble: thoughtful, ashamed of his appearance
screwed up her face: anger, smiling, ready to cry, could almost be any emotion
sneered and flicked lint off his suit: conceit, derision, scorn
Arm and Hand
a vicious yank
arm curled around her waist, tugging her next to him: possessive, pride, protective
bit her lip and glanced away: shy, ashamed, insecure
brandished his fist: anger, threatening, ready to fight, confident, show of pride
clamped his fingers into tender flesh: anger, protective, wants to inflict pain
clenched his dirty little fists: stubborn, angry
clapped her hands on her hips, arms crooked like sugar bowel handles: anger, demanding, disbelief
constantly twirled her hair and tucked it behind her ear: attracted to the opposite sex, shy crossed his arms over his chest: waiting, impatient, putting a barrier
crushed the paper in his fist: anger, surrender, discard
dived into the food: hunger, eager, greedy
doffed his hat: polite gesture, mocking, teasing
doodled on the phone pad and tapped the air with her foot: bored, inattention, introspection
drummed her fingers on the desk: impatient, frustrated, bored
fanned her heated face with her hands: physically hot, embarrassed, indicating attraction
fiddled with his keys: nervous, bored
firm, palm to palm hand shake: confident, honest
flipped him the bird: sarcastic discard
forked his fingers through his hair for the third time: disquiet/consternation, worry, thoughtful
handed it over shame-faced: guilt, shame
held his crotch and danced a frantic jig: physical need to relieve himself
limp hand shake: lack of confidence, lack of enthusiasm
propped his elbow on his knee: relaxed, thoughtful
punched her pillow: restless, can’t sleep, angry
rested his chin in his palm: thoughful, worried
scratched his hairy belly and yawned: indolent, bored, lazy, relaxed, just waking
shoulders lifted in a shrug: doubtful, careless discard
slapped his face in front of God and country: enraged, affronted/insulted
snapped a sharp salute: respect, sarcastic gesture meaning the opposite of respect
snapped his fingers, expecting service: arrogant, lack of respect, self-centered
sneered and flicked lint off his suit
spread her arms wide: welcoming, joy, love
stabbed at the food: anger, hunger, determined
stood straighter and smoothed his tie: sudden interest, possible sexual interest
stuffed his hands in his pockets: self-conscious, throwing up a barrier
sweaty handshake: nervous, fearful
touched his arm several times while explaining: sign of attraction, flattery, possessive
wide sweep of his arms: welcoming, all inclusive gesture, horror
Sitting or Rising
collapsed in a stupor: exhausted, drunk, drugged, disbelief
enthroned himself at the desk: conceit, pronouncing or taking ownership
exploded out of the chair: shock, eager, anger, supreme joy
roosted on the porch rail like a cock on a hen house roof: claiming ownership, conceit, content
sat, squaring an ankle over one knee: relaxed and open
slouched/wilted in a chair and paid languid attention to: drowsy, lazy, depressed, disinterest, sad, totally relaxed, disrespectful
squirmed in his chair: ill at ease, nervous, needs the bathroom
Recline
flung himself into the bed: sad, depressed, exhausted, happy
prostrated himself: surrender, desperate, miserable, powerless, obsequious, fawning, flattering
punched her pillow: can’t sleep, anger, frustrated
threw himself on the floor kicking and screaming: tantrum
Entire body and General
body stiffened at the remark: offended, anger, alerted
body swayed to music: dreamy, fond memories, enjoys the music
bounced in the car seat, pointing: excitement, fear, eager
cowered behind his brother: fear, shyness, coward, desperate
curled into a ball: sorrow, fear, sleepy, defensive
heart galloping: anxiety, joy, eager
held his crotch and danced a frantic jig
humped over his cane, each step shaking and careful: pain, aged
inhaled a deep breath and blew out slowly: buying time to find words/thoughtful, reconciled
quick and jerky like rusty cogs on a wheel: unsure of actions, self-conscious, tense, edgy
rocked back and forth on his heels: impatient, cocky, gleeful
manhandled the woman into a corner: bully, anger
slumped shoulders: defeat, depressed, sad, surrender
stiff-backed: priggish, haughty, affronted
stood straighter and straightened his tie: sexual interest, wants to make an impression
stooped and bent: aged, arthritic, in pain
stretched extravagantly and yawned: tired, bored, unconcerned
sweating uncontrollably: nervous, fear, guilt
tall erect posture: confidence, military bearing
was panting now at: afraid, exhausted, out of breath, sexual excitement
-Sharla Rae
Heres a reminder for you that being dissociated isn't limited to the common misconception where you are frozen in place, incapable of doing anything or even thinking, or experiencing a significant time gap,, those things.
And while its hard to spot the milder signs when you're dissociating, don't worry i got you covered by bringing awareness, im showing what those signs could look like:
Dazing/blanking out several times
Hands looking weird (depersonalization)
Surroundings also looking weird (derealization)
Feeling detached emotionally, physically, or both
Light-headedness
Less reactive in responding
Forget things more often
Unable to focus or keep concentration straight
When you have multiple of those signs at once, then chances are you are dissociating (extra note that it can also co-occur with derealization/depersonalization). While it can be caused by various factors, i would like to add that it may or may not get worse as time passes and no one wants that thing to snowball until it got too bad (remember, preventing now is better than dealing later) so having a few tips would help:
Grounding (sensory): listening to music, feeling different textures, paying attention to things in your surroundings, trying different fragrant or scents, have some snacks to occupy your senses
Grounding (physically): feel your chest as you breathe, get your body moving to redirect focus, splash some cold water, hold something you can squeeze (such as a stress ball)
Practice being mindful. As it can help you re-anchor back to reality faster, regulate better, building more resilience, increasing awareness of oneself's state
Sometimes we go do our day without giving a thought that were detached from reality, usually by going autopilot and scrolling through social medias without being aware (well, atleast for me) and forget lots of things while being dysregulated at the end. So by being aware of the mild signs and incorporating grounding skills im sure memory gaps and those funny aftermath stuffs won't be a problem anymore, have a good day peeps.
EDIT: I forgot to mention that another sign is your hearing feels muffled, that you can hear sounds feel more distant despite close, i thought it could be grouped with the “less reactive” before.
- j
ways to help protestors if you are unable to protest
everybody has to do their part. as a reference, this was posted on 1 june 2020. if any links are broken or direct to a place they should not, please feel free to add on with corrections. if there is new information with better knowledge, please feel free to share. thank you.
1. donate
do not donate to shaun king. he has repeatedly collected money to “support” black people, but no one knows where the money is.
BAIL FUNDS (ALPHABETICAL ORDER; NOT A COMPREHENSIVE LIST)
note: washington dc and new jersey have cashless bail systems.
bail fund google doc (also includes lawyers for protestors)
national bail fund network (directory of community bail funds)
community bail funds masterpost by @keplercryptids
resistance funds (google sheets; lists bail funds around the country)
nationwide bail funds (split a donation to the bail funds listed on the linked page with a single transaction)
atlanta bail fund
brooklyn bail fund
colorado freedom fund
columbus freedom fund
houston chapter of black lives matter
liberty fund (nyc based; focuses services on people from low-income communities)
los angeles freedom fund
louisville community fund
massachusetts bail fund
minnesota freedom fund (as of may 30, 2020, they are encouraging people to donate elsewhere since they have raised enough money; as of may 29, 2020, they do not have a venmo, as some fraudulent accounts have been claiming, source)
philadelphia bail out fund
richmond bail fund
MORE PLACES TO DONATE
note: more links are listed in the masterposts below.
northstar health collective (healthcare and medical aid for people on the front lines)
reclaim the block (aims to redistribute police funding to help the minneapolis community)
twin cities dsa (provides fresh groceries and hot meals to people in minneapolis)
2. educate yourself
it isn’t enough to sign petitions and reblog/retweet/etc. nonblack people, including people of color, owe it to black people to educate themselves and correct themselves and the people around them on anti-blackness.
note: more links are in the masterposts linked below.
resources and tools regarding racism and anti-blackness (google sheets compilation)
readings on society, racism, the prison system, etc. (twitter thread)
“where do we go after ferguson?” by michael eric dyson
official black lives matter website
3. give out supplies to protestors
people need supplies to protest safely, and even if they bring supplies with them, they can often run out. if you’re able, stock up and hand them out to people protesting. for more supplies to donate, see the “george floyd action” google docs link in section 5.
water bottles (dehydration and heatstroke are not things people should have to deal with alongside bastard cops. if the police in your area are particularly violent or known to use tear gas, get the ones with the sports cap/suction-thing/etc so people can use them as emergency eye-flushes.)
snacks (make sure to take into account that people have allergies of all sorts. foods will have a little label that says “may contain” and then list any potential allergens. write the allergens on the ziploc (or any container you use) in permanent marker, or better yet, write the snacks included in the pack.)
masks (don’t forget there’s still a pandemic going on. also it will aid in deterring facial recognition when the police try to track down protestors, also part two, if the cops use tear gas, wearing a mask (with the combination of a scarf or bandana) will lessen the adverse effects. lessen, not stop.)
bandanas, scarves, etc. and goggles (ski goggles, swimming goggles, etc.) (see above for explanation on the scarves. same goes for the goggles. anti–tear gas and anti–facial recognition.)
clean shirts (for people who are heavily gassed. also helps deter recognition through clothing.)
wound care supplies (band-aids, packets of neosporin packets or a similar antibiotic, alcohol wipes, etc.; if you can, decant bactine into those little travel bottles.)
a sharpie or another type of marker (for writing bail numbers or emergency contacts on arms, hands, etc. it’s not enough to have your city’s bail fund number stored on your phone; the police won’t give it to you to look it up. give people a marker so they can write it down, preferably not washable so it isn’t easily removed.)
IMPORTANT: KNOWING FIRST AID
tear gas: if you’re hit, get out as fast and as soon as you can. take anyone you can with you. the longer you’re in the gas, the harder it will be for you to see, and it can irritate your airways, making it hard to breathe. if you’re hit, don’t run; it’ll only make things worse on your lungs. when you leave the area, take a cold shower. don’t use hot water (it will only reactivate the agent); don’t bathe (it will only spread the CS around). (source 1) (source 2) (cdc fact sheet on tear gas)
move them to a clean and ventilated area where it’s as safe as possible.
ask them if they’re wearing contact lenses. have them remove it. if they’re wearing glasses, rinse it with water.
solution of half liquid antacid, half water. spray from the inside going out, with the head tilted back and slightly towards the side being rinsed. if they say it’s okay, open the eye slightly while doing this. (source)
bullet wounds: the most important thing is to stop the bleeding. be sure to check for an exit wound and cover that as well. treat both wounds, but treat the worse one first.
stop the bleed (youtube video by uc san diego health)
first aid in active shooting scenarios
making a tourniquet (a commercial tourniquet is best, but improvised ones can work as well if done properly; the most important things to remember is that tourniquets are for limb injuries and are not meant for the head or torso and that they have to be very tightly wound on the injury.)
how to apply pressure dressings
miscellaneous
adult cpr tutorial (youtube video by cincinnati children’s; think of “staying alive” by the beegees or “uptown funk”)
4. be a source of information
be responsible with this. people’s lives are at stake. that being said, the media is a fucking joke and the best way to get accurate information in a grassroots rebellion is amongst ourselves. record everything, but if you are going to share any information at all, be sure to blur people’s faces.
signal (encrypted messenger app; messages delete after x amount of time): app store | google play
tool for scrubbing metadata from images and selectively blurring identifiable features
tech tips to protect yourself while protesting (by rey.nbows on tiktok, via vicent_efl on twitter)
cop spotting 101 (google docs)
know your rights (by personachuu on twitter)
NUMBERS TO CALL FOR ARRESTED PROTESTORS (ALPHABETICAL ORDER; SOURCES LINKED TO THE NUMBER)
remember to keep phones OFF unless absolutely necessary. cell phone towers, stingrays, location notifs can all be used to track you and other protestors. don’t fuck around. if your phone must be on, keep it on airplane mode as often as possible and only communicate using encrypted methods. no, snapchat doesn’t count. (a twitter thread on stingrays, for those interested)
lawyers assisting protestors pro-bono (by riyakatariax on twitter)
atlanta: 404-689-1519
chicago: 773-309-1198
minneapolis: 612-444-2654
5. miscellaneous links and links for protestors
masterpost of petitions to sign, numbers to call, places to donate, and more (carrd by dehyedration on twitter)
#blacklivesmatter (google docs by ambivaIcnt on twitter; includes information on relevant events, other masterposts, lists of petitions and donation links, how to protest safely and protests to go to, and more)
george floyd action (google docs; includes information on apps to download, supplies to buy and donate, places to donate to, protest safety, resources on unlearning racial bias, and more)
how to get out of ziptie “handcuffs” (by finnianj on tiktok, via katzerax on twitter)
how can i help? by @abbiheartstaylor
how to make a signal-blocking cell phone pouch
tips for protestors by @aurora00boredealis
twitter thread for protestors (by vantaemuseum on twitter)
also, if you’re protesting, change your passcode. make it at least 11 characters long and don’t use facial/thumb recognition.
grantgust: Swipe through these in my story. This is something I’ve been thinking a lot about recently and having conversations with friends, family and people on social media about. It’s embarrassing for me personally to admit as a 30 year old adult, but being anti racist wasn’t something I had thought much about. I really thought knowing I wasn’t racist was enough. I knew what was in my heart and I thought carrying that with me would be enough. I’ve always been more comfortable mostly keeping to myself. I’m what you could call an introvert and a homebody. Ironically enough, being in the spotlight or putting myself out there can really make me uncomfortable. I’ve never thought of myself as an activist and I honestly still don’t. I’ve never felt smart enough I guess. I’ve never felt like I truly have something to contribute. But I’ve realized and am realizing that it’s my whiteness that allowed me to think just knowing I wasn’t racist was enough. I was naive. What I’m learning now is that’s not enough. I need to be more actively anti racist. My black friends and black Americans I don’t know are depending on me and other people with skin like mine to use our voices right now. And they always have been. I was just naive enough to think that that wasn’t my fight. That I was “doing my part” by not being racist. I’m going to continue to use my platform and just my every day life and encounters to be a better ally for people that didn’t have the head start in life that I did. I’m sorry it took me so long to get here. I’m here now. I know I still don’t have all the tools needed or all the knowledge to be the best possible ally. But I know now me being uncomfortable is just going to be a part of the equation and I’m willing to have those conversations and to do my best to help.
Uh yes ma'am I do lol. Running? Hilarious. I'll knock myself out with these things. Back aches, shoulder pain, finding a goddamn bra that's actually cute and fits correctly and doesn't cost a car payment? 😤 it's like anyone over a B-C cup, suddenly bra makers don't understand how titties work
A m e n to all of this. Oh God it’s like impossible. They don’t even carry my damn size in stores. Not even places like Torrid that everyone loves to suggest to me 🙄
I like to use the online barenecessities! There are some great minimizer bras that flatten you down and make em look a lot smaller than they are! It’s just annoying, the sales NEVER include bigger cup sizes, they’re always for tiny ones like A-D. Which is ironic because those are already cheaper bras anyway!
DO IT NOW: Guide to Proper Bra Fit and Measuring because Victoria Secret and La Senza and whatever are full of shit and you are definitely wearing the wrong size ok? ok
Hi guys I’m obsessed with this shit lately because I don’t want anyone to have unhappy, unsupported boobs like I did. Even if you think your boobs and bras are fine, try it. It will make a big difference in comfort, support, and shape, even if you have small boobs or big boobs. A proper fitting bra can fix back, shoulder, and neck pain, along with breast soreness - and it can help you look 10lbs lighter, and your breasts a hell of a lot perkier. This guide also works for proper-sized bikinis and bathing suits (many online stores linked to below sell both- sometimes for as low as 10$!)
Don’t just like this, REBLOG IT. EVERYBODY WITH BOOBS DESERVES A PROPER FIT. Even if you don’t wear bras yourself, spread it around to tumblr or with your friends or family.
Grab a soft tape measurer (use inches) and get nekkid - don’t wear a bra or shirt please, you don’t wear a bra or shirt underneath your bra, do you? This part is fast and easy, and will help you find your ‘Starting Point’ bra size - you may not end up in this exact size, but it will get you in the right ballpark.
How to Measure:
Measure your underbust - go right underneath the root of your breasts, but make sure the tape is straight/parallel to the floor. Take a firm, snug measurement - if you have chub, take it tighter.
Measure your bust bent over - bend forward so your back is parallel to the floor and your boobs are hanging so you have access to all that beautiful breast tissue that is now brought forward. Measure very loosely around the nipples, keeping tape straight/horizontal/perpendicular to the floor.
If your breasts are kind of empty and/or have a lot of sag, this method may overestimate your cup size. Instead, take your bust measurement bent over, standing, and lying flat on your back, and take an average of those three measurements and use that for your calculations.
How to Use These Measurements to find your ‘Starting Size’:
Round up your underbust measurement to the nearest even number. If you are only half an inch or less away from being a lower size, use that instead (unless you have a bony ribcage). This is automatically your band size. No BS. There is no adding imaginary inches here.
The difference between your underbust measurement and your bust measurement dictates your cup size. Every 1 inch in difference represents a cup size, so 1 inch = A, 2 = B, 3 = C, 4 = D. As you can see here, a true D or DD cup is actually pretty fucking small.
CUP SIZES ARE NOT STANDARD, UNLIKE COMMONLY THOUGHT (AND TOLD TO US BY ASSHOLES LIKE VS). They are TOTALLY relative to band size. The cup on a 30D has 4 inches less volume than the cup on a 34D. A 30D is actually the same cup size as a 34B!
No one has their shit together on the lettering for each cup size, so here’s a handy dandy chart. Remember to go with UK measurement as they somewhat have their shit together (and because American companies do not make much above DD, so there’s literally no point in knowing it, but the European sizing may come in handy)
I DON’T CARE IF YOU LIVE IN THE USA, DO NOT USE THE AMERICAN MEASUREMENTS, FFS. YOU’LL ONLY MAKE THINGS HARDER AND MORE CONFUSING FOR YOURSELF. ANY BOUTIQUE IN NORTH AMERICA WORTH GOING TO, AND 99% OF ONLINE STORES, IS GOING TO SELL PRIMARILY BRITISH OR EUROPEAN BRANDS AND WILL GO BY THEIR SIZING. THERE IS LITERALLY NO POINT IN KNOWING AMERICAN SIZING
DO NOT USE AMERICAN SIZING
DO NOT USE AMERICAN FUCKING SIZING
EVEN IF YOU ARE AMERICAN
AND LIVE IN THE US
USE THE BRITISH SIZING
For example, I have a 29.5 inch underbust and a 38 inch bust when bent over. So, I should take a 30 band and then there’s an 8 inch difference. So I am a 30FF in UK sizing. This is just my starting point when looking for bras, and I may not always end up with this exact size
Do not pull the ‘omg no I’m not a G cup my boobs aren’t that big you’re more stupid that the idea of vegetable bread’ shit with me ok? You drank the Kool-Aid and now you need to piss it out. CUP SIZES ARE NOT STANDARD. A 34D IS BIGGER IN THE CUPS THAN A 30E. Here, take a look at a chart of cup volumes and see what I mean.
Also… not all ‘big cup’ bras are ugly and granny-like. Just check out brands like Freya or Gossard or Gorteks or Panache or Cleo! They are gorgeous!
Trying it on: What a proper fit is like
ALWAYS SCOOP AND SWOOP BEFORE ASSESSING WHETHER IT FITS OR NOT. What does this mean? This means bend over, hike up your bra so that it sits right under the root of your breasts. Then, start smooshing all your back fat and armpit rolls or any loose tissue thats underneath or to the side of the cup, INTO the cup. All that stuff is breast tissue that got pushed around from your shitty bras, no I am not bullshitting - after a few months of wearing better bras, many people end up having to get a bigger cup and sometimes even a smaller band too, as all the smooshed breast tissue migrates back to the boob, where it should be. Not kidding. So get everything in there and make sure the wire is positioned perfectly under your boobs. Then stand up and assess the fit. If it seemed to fit before scooping, it won’t fit now.
THIS IS JUST A STARTING POINT. Try on your starting size and work from there. You may need to go up or down a band size, or up or down many cup sizes. Not all brands or even models in that brand are made the same way, and the shape of your boobs also helps determine the size and fit, so don’t try on JUST the size you calculated, say “it doesn’t fit”, and then give up and go back to your 36Cs. You aren’t doing yourself any favours. If you don’t feel comfortable in your ‘starting point size’, go ahead and try a size up or down in bands and/or a size or two or even three up or down in cups as needed.
ALWAYS start on the loosest hook. If you need to start on the tightest hook, go down a band size. The point of hooks is simple - as your bra gets used, it gradually loses its elasticity and gets loose. So, you use your hooks to bring it in, and when you reach the last hook, well, be prepared to get rid of your bra in a few months (unless you invest in a band tightener like the Rixie Clip)
A proper fit means the bra band is straight and parallel to the floor. If it isn’t, and seems to be getting pulled up, its too big and isn’t supporting you. Get a smaller band. You shouldn’t be able to stretch it more than a couple inches off your back. It may feel tight at first, but bras do need ‘breaking in’ and you are used to wearing things that do not fit correctly, so give it a chance. Of course, it should not hurt either!
A proper fit means your bra straps are not digging in.
A proper fit means the gore (the little centerpiece of the bra where the wires sort of meet) MUST tack/sit firmly against your chest. If it doesn’t, then the wires are not truly fully underneath your boobs and so are not giving you the proper support.
A proper fit means your boobs must fit smoothly into the entire cup (after scooping and swooping). The wire should totally encase all your breast tissue (this includes armpit fat and stuff). There should be no empty space at the bottom or top of the cup. Your boobs should not be overflowing from the top of the cup. If there’s overflowing or uncontained tissue after scooping, or of it feels tight, get a bigger cup.
A proper fit means you should be able to lift your arms over your head and jump around without the band or underwire budging or exposing underboob.
Size Tweaks/Troubleshooting (make sure you scoop and swoop first):
The band feels tight: Is the gore tacking or not? If not, go up a cup size or two (or maybe even three or four). Even if the gore is tacking, try this first. The band may be tight because the cups are too small, so your boobs are stretching the band out too much to overcompensate for lack of cup depth, making it feel tighter. If after trying larger cups, it still feels uncomfortably tight, go up a band size (and down a cup size if the first size fit well in the cups - remember, cup is relative to band, a 32DD is the same in the cups as a 34D). Remember though that it takes a few days to break a bra in, so it may feel tight or perfect at first, and then comfortable or too loose later.
The band feels loose/band is riding up and not remaining parallel to the floor: Go down a band size (and up a cup size or two because blablah relativity).
The gore is not tacking, but band is not tight: Band size is too big, or maybe fits just right - but the cups are too small. You know what to do.
Boobs spilling over: Go up a cup size. Check first though that the bottom of the cup is not empty, and hike it up if it is!
Empty space at bottom of cup: Hike that shit up so it gets right to the roots of your breasts. This may fix bulging/spillage. If you can’t get it higher, then you need a smaller cup or this make of bra is just not suited to your shape.
Empty space at top of cup: You need a smaller cup, or this shape of bra just does not suit you your breasts, especially if your breasts are not very full on top. Or you need to scoop and swoop!
Straps digging in: Loosen them. If your boobs suddenly sag, then the band is not supportive enough, and you need a tighter band.
Armpit rolls: Bigger cup and/or scoop and swoop that shit. The cut of bra may also just not be for you (for now anyway - your armpit rolls may migrate back into the boobs and disappear eventually!)
They don’t even make my size!!: If you’re in a 28-48 D-KK (UK sizing) cup, you will find your size online easily enough. however, if you have a smaller band than that or need smaller cups, they are hard to find - message me and I’ll try to help you with a solution!
So, for example, my starting size may be 30FF, but I may end up wearing a 28G or H if the band of that model is too loose and the gore not tacking. Or the band may be fine and I may need a bigger cup so I’ll get a 30G. Or The band may be good but the cups too big, so I’ll get a 30F or E. Or the band may be too small to be comfortable and I’ll wear a 32F or E (same cupsize-ish as 30FF!).
What Not to Do:
NEVER PUT YOUR BRA IN THE DRYER. AND PREFERABLY, WASH IT BY HAND. The heat and twisting ruins the elasticity of the bra and reduces its life! This is the best way to ruin bras, don’t do it.
Do not add 3 or 4 or 5 inches or whatever to your band measurement. That is BS that American companies use so that they don’t have to manufacture a larger range of sizes - they use it to fit you into their stock, not their stock onto you. The band will be too big and unsupportive. Those 4 inches they add to the band are 4 inches that should be in the cup size, so no wonder people think anything over DD should be huge.
Do not measure your ‘overbust’ cause really what the fuck does that have to do with how large you are underneath your boobs, come on
Do not do the above because 80% of the support comes from the band, which needs to be firm against you and not be sliding or moving around.Would you wear underwear 4 inches bigger than your hips? No, so why would you wear a bra band 4 inches bigger than your ribcage that gets pulled up and stuff and would fall off if not for the straps, while expecting it to support the boobies at the same time?
Do not go down a band size and then forget to go up a cup size or two. Again, cup sizes are not static. A 30FF is the same cup volume as a 32F or E. If you don’t do this, no shit the bra will fit badly or feel tight.
Do not go straight to Victoria’s Secret or La Senza or whatever, even if you are lucky enough to fit in their small range of sizes - they don’t seem to follow sizing very well. Still, try, by all means, but be aware that their bras may be odd compared to others.
"But where do I get these Bras? I’ve never even seen these sizes!“
Luckily, the internet makes this shit really easy. Buying bras online is nearly always way cheaper, even with shipping, and even if coming from somewhere in Europe! But of course, its best to try on stuff first, to avoid the hassle of return shipping (even though its still not that expensive - just annoying). So what I advise is to find a store near you, try stuff on there, note down the Brand, Model, and Size, and then buy it online for up to a quarter of of the in-store price.
If you can’t find a store near you, online ordering is still extremely cheap, even with return shipping. Instead of getting a whole bunch of bras in only 1 size each, pick out a few models and order a few sizes of each. Ex: one with a bigger or smaller band if your measurements are close to needing a bigger or smaller band size, and then some up or down a couple cup sizes so you can compare the fit. When you have the perfect fit in one bra, it will be easier to go on Bratabase or r/ABraThatFits and have them suggest bras that give similar shape or suggest a different size to you as a model you’re interested in may run large or small.
So, Where to Find:
Note: You can find proper-sized bras as low as 10$ US online (particularly from ebay or brastop.com) and most average 30-45$.
List of Online Retailers from BustyResourcesWiki: A complete list of online retailers around da world. Many ship internationally so take a look at all of them (particularly the UK ones)
Ebay, Etsy, and Amazon all have bras inexpensively.
List of Offline Retailers from BustyResourcesWiki: List of chain-stores (not of privately owned stores)
If in Canada, look for a Change Lingerie near you to try on bras. Note that they only carry their own brand.
If in the USA, look for a Nordstrom or Nordstrom Rack near you to try on bras. They carry all sorts of brands and have an online store as well (and also ship to Canada!)
Use a store locator from the webpage of a bra brand company to find non-chain, privately owned stores - if they have one of these brands, they’ll have others. Here’s the locator for Freya, Curvy Kate, Fantasie, Chantelle, Panache, and Affinitas. There are more than just these of course.
If you are small in the band AND in the cup (under a D cup) look at the Little Bra Company.
Ask around on Bratabase or r/ABraThatFits for stores near you.
WOMAN, YOU HAVE THE INTERNET! GOOGLE! YELP!
WARNING: There are many chain stores (Nordstrom, Lane Bryant, Mark and Spencer, Change etc) that do bra fittings and have a good reputation. However, each store is different - some measure correctly, and some use the stupid VS method. Every store has a different team of employees and knowledge. DO NOT GO IN WITHOUT HAVING MEASURED YOURSELF FIRST, JUST IN CASE THEY ARE ONE OF THE BAD STORES. DO NOT TRUST ALL BRA FITTERS, EVEN IF SOMEONE RECOMMENDED THEM TO YOU. If your fitter gives you a measurement different from this one, be mentally prepared to have a difficult time getting them to help you find the right bra.
I had the fitter at Change help me, and when I mentioned that the gore did not tack, she said “Oh, the gore never touches the chest with these bras”. I was like HAHA NOPE BRING ME A LARGER CUP WOMAN. And lo and behold, 2 extra cup sizes later, the gore tacked (and my boobs stopped spilling out). She was very nice otherwise but if I hadn’t known better that could have been bad.
Resources:
r/ABraThatFits: forum for bras, they will help you with sizing, fitting, and finding the right model for your breast shape - they have links to a lot of resources, such as online stores, used bra listings, etc.
Busty Resources Wiki: Great resource for fitting tips, diagrams, explanations, styles.
Bra Band Project: an online gallery of what various sizes look like! Dump your disbelief!
List of Online Retailers: Online is MUCH cheaper and shipping is usually cheap too, even from Europe. Try bras in a store near you , pick out what you like, and order them online instead.
Bratabase: Database of bras, with user inputted measurements of each bra model in its size - bras may be marked the same size, but with this you can see which may have bigger or smaller bands or cups, or what style may suit what shape of breast, all of which helps find the perfect fit for you!
Great Youtube Video on Bra Fitting: This is one of the few people on Youtube who knows their shit about bras. Great for the visuals to help you understand what a bad fit and proper fit look like.
Venusian Glow is a great bra blog - SO MUCH INFO. Suggests bras based on your boob shape amongst other things.
I got an ask from someone who felt timid about drawing curlier hair and wanted some advice! This is by NO means exhaustive and is mostly just my thought process for my own stylization. There are tons of resources for drawing more textured hair, so for this I just wanted to focus on curls. hope it helps!
GoldCanines: “I had lots of questions on how I go about my shading ! ✨
Here is how I pick my colors, determine my layers, and lay out my shading !”
Source: GoldCanines on Twitter
do you have a masterpost with stock photos sites and reference for poses?? i always get a terrible art block while deciding what to draw but i don't know much ref sites with free photos.
Reference Generator for:
Humans
Sports
And I wrote a lot more in-depth about the topic here:
https://artres.xyz/post/improve-your-poses-with-these-fantastic-resources-/
Here’s an excerpt of the article:
Other Awesome resources & websites for pose inspiration and reference
These tools are great because they offer you excellent references, which is great for doing studies or are in need of inspiration.
Posemaniacs - superb resource that allows you to rotate the poses in 3D w/ anatomy details. They also have timers and an app. It’s a good alternative to a full, human anatomy atlas.
Biodigital’s Human Visualization Platform - A really nice human anatomy atlas that is free. Another paid option that I love and use is Complete Anatomy by 3D4Medical.It goes on sale and is geared towards medical students, so it’s very indepth, accurate, and beautiful to look at.
Quickposes: pose library for figure & gesture drawing practice
SketchDaily Gesture/Figure Drawing from the Subreddit SketchDaily
#posereference | Explore posereference on DeviantArt
Pinterest Pins - pinterest is great for content discovery
Senshistock’s Website & DeviantArt Gallery Wonderful stock photos for reference.
Anatomy 360 | Real 3D reference for artists - paid
Randomly generated visual reference board on humans
Hope this helps!
Sorry I am super SUPER behind on asks and stuff. I sort of answer them out of order too. On my winter break, I probably will spend a lot more time catching up.
Thanks for reading! If this post helped, please consider reblogging it or sharing it with your friends! ❤️
More useful articles and resources / support Art-Res | my art tumblr | Idea Generator | Check out the Art-Res Anatomy Ebook!
