Rm Ff - Blog Posts

Singularity

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: Namjoon × Reader

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“Shit!” I huffed out as I had to climb the stairs up to the third floor and my poor lungs wouldn’t want to cooperate as always, “I forgot my water bottle at home again.”

“You can have mine, no problem!” a boy handed me his half filled plastic bottle.

I usually follow one rule while drinking water from other people’s bottles. I ask them if they touch their lips to the bottles opening while drinking and usually refuse to drink from the same bottle if they do.

That day, however, I didn’t have the mind to do that as I straight up uncapped the bottle to finish the whole thing in one go. When I looked up to say ‘thanks’ and ‘sorry’, he was already gone. As it was almost time for the next class, I supposed he hurried to get to his. I remembered the boy’s name to be Namjoon.

Namjoon was a boy I would often see in between classes. Sometimes we would nod, ask when the next class was or simply smile at each other. And then, we’d go our separate ways. I knew him just like that. I didn’t remember ever having a full conversation with him.

I didn’t see him again after that day. But I heard some rumors about him around the campus not long after. He was accused of saying something that sparked controversy. Since I didn’t know him in person I never expressed my opinion on the matter. But I had a lingering wish to meet him again, to return his empty plastic bottle that I still carry in my bag.

That wish came true when I finally saw him again.

He was having lunch at an empty table at the corner of the cafeteria. There was no one around so I walked up to him right away.

“I’m so sorry I could not return your bottle that day!” I had told him.

“What bottle?” He looked at me with genuine confusion.

I took out the said bottle from my bag to put on the table. Namjoon let out a chuckle at its sight. “You wanted to return this?”

“I know, it might not be a huge deal to you. But I literally can’t sleep in peace until I return what I borrow from someone else. Be it a pen or book or whatever.” I explained myself clearly to which Namjoon nodded and took the empty bottle off the table.

“I’ll take it back then.” He said, “Hope it gives you some peace.”

He shook his head slightly and laughed. For some reason, I felt overwhelmed seeing him laugh like that. His eyes completely vanished behind the wrinkles as he laughed. He looked so unreal. I couldn’t make up my mind why I was feeling that way at such a small act of someone I barely knew. But I had a feeling that it was a moment I would never witness again. I felt the need to capture it in a picture so that I could look at it whenever I wanted to.

However, I didn't take his picture that day. Instead I stood there for a while, enjoying the moment as it was. He didn’t invite me to sit next to him. I wished he did.

The next time I heard about Namjoon was from a group of friends talking about college in general. I wasn't minding their gossip until I heard them speak about him.

"Good grades aren't everything, you see!" One of them said, "you need to have a better character to not be kicked out of school like that."

I was shocked to find what happened to Namjoon regarding those rumors. As much as I wanted to interrupt their conversation, I couldn't bring myself to do so. Yet my heart couldn't believe a word of the dirty talks I heard around. Even though I wasn't a friend of his, neither was I an acquaintance, in my heart, I still pictured him as the smiling boy who had helped me at the time I needed it.

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Note: Inspired by a dream...

My Masterlist

True Self - Part 3 (Final)

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader Genre: Fluff and Angst Warning: None I hope so... Word Count: 1k Words Note: Please bear it in mind that it’s totally fictional. I tried my best to include some of the aspects of Namjoon in here. Personally I think, Namjoon is one of the best men to ever exist. Wish I could do him justice.

Summary: When everything seemed like they’re falling apart, you figure out Namjoon’s true self, making you fall in love with him...

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 [Complete]

*************************************************

We were finally having the vacation on our own as Namjoon had promised. I was relieved to be seemingly far away from the world, Namjoon by my side without anyone to interfere, relaxing peacefully after some stressful days.

I was sleeping better being cuddled up with Namjoon at night. Waking up next to him was the most comforting experience. Just watching him sleep with his mouth slightly open could make my day better.

I realized I was noticing his very small habits and I found them adorable. One of them, which I was absolutely in love with, was seeing him read. Every morning he would read for at least an hour and sometimes more. I would occasionally accompany him and read too. Sometimes I would sit beside and watch him read for hours.

We would go to art museums together and interpreted them in our own ways. Once we became so passionate about our views that we ended up having a heated discussion. But we made up at night when I bought him gummy bears.

We would watch dramas or movies together at night. Usually he would let me pick up my favorite movies to watch. Even there, we wouldn’t shut up about putting forward our theories and analyzing characters.

This creative and liberal way of thinking was something I appreciated the most in him. I was glad he didn’t think of me as crazy because I was always too obsessed over fictional worlds. Sometimes, I scared myself thinking that everything was a dream and one day I would wake up to find out that there was no existence of him and all of it were actually my imagination.

But we surely had our differences. Even though it might sound petty, a huge incident took place due to this. And it was hilarious.

Namjoon had planned to surprise me by taking me blindfolded to the seaside where there were a lot of crabs. And let me get this straight; he absolutely loved crabs while I absolutely hated them.

As soon as the blindfold was taken off, I was screaming and jumping as if my feet was on fire. Namjoon was too confused for a whole minute until he realized I was screaming in fear and not because I was excited to see them. Finally Namjoon had to give me a piggy ride from the seashore back to the hotel.

*************************************************

We were sitting at the beach waiting for the sunset. I was a little upset since it was our last day of the vacation. I wasn't ready to go back just then.

"What are you thinking about, darling?" Namjoon asked as I rested my head on his shoulder.

"About how life is going to be like once we go back." I sighed.

He placed his hand on my head softly, caressing my hair, "you worry a little too much about the future."

"Can't help it." I shrugged my shoulder.

"I have a proposal to make." He sat straight facing me, "I want you to hear me out."

I nodded, letting him know that he had my full attention.

"I did a little thinking," He said, "not little, a lot of thinking actually."

"About what?"

"About us." He took my hands in his, "I will make it official."

"What?" My eyes were wide in shock.

"Yeah," He said rather calmly, "I know my fans. They will always support me. No matter what!"

I was silent, unable to believe what I was hearing. My heart was beating fast. I was afraid. Afraid because I feared I would lose him.

"Now, here's my real proposal." He squeezed my hands softly, "Will you come stay with me?"

"Are you sure about all these?" I asked.

"Of course, darling. It's about time we made our decisions for our sakes. I don't want to hide away anymore. Let's face it together."

I nodded again. "But I don't want to lose you." I couldn't hold it back.

"Why are you worried about losing me, darling?"

I shrugged my shoulders again. We remained silent for some time.

"Look!" He pointed at the sky, "The sun's setting already. So, shall we kiss, now?"

I laughed out at this. Then, he cupped my face in his huge hands and leaned to kiss me.

When he let go, I said, "Yes, I will stay with you."

*************************************************

At first I was overwhelmed by all the attention from the media and my surrounding as well. My friends who were out of touch for a long time started to check on me, asking me all sorts of questions regarding Namjoon and other members.

But like Namjoon had said, I got used to it eventually. I started to receive lots of love from his fans too. They started to appreciate Namjoon’s decision and respected our privacy.

Now, I had moved to live with him on his house. It wasn’t very far away from mine. So that, my mother and sister would occasionally come to pay us a visit and I could go back too.

The wildest experience I had in my entire life was going to the tour with Namjoon. It was so exciting and exhausting at the same time. I got closer to the other members too. Seeing them from up close, I was really fascinated by the strong bond they share.

I saw the emotions that filled Namjoon up every time after a performance. He loved his fans very much and they meant a lot to him. I considered myself very lucky to get to know this side of him.

Namjoon always liked to work on his music alone. So, I would always let him be and didn’t bother him in any ways. But one day, he asked me to accompany him while he worked.

I said, “But I thought you like working alone.”

“Yeah,” he said, “But sometimes it gets a little lonely in there. I want you by my side for the new song I’m working on.”

“Why?” I asked, “Is it about me?”

“Don’t worry,” Namjoon smiled and said, “You’ll be the first to know.”

*************************************************

“It’s so hot,” I said, breathing heavily, “Let’s go back.”

“C’mon,” Namjoon pouted, “A few more hours, please.”

“A few more hours?” I gasped, “I’m gonna pass out anytime now.”

Namjoon stopped his bike in front of a store. We both got down and went inside to get some cold drinks and ice creams. It was a rather hot summer day. Namjoon had planned to take me to a bike ride to nowhere since he took some time off work after a long time.

“Mint chocolate!” he exclaimed in disgust, “I can’t believe you like this flavor.”

“Thank God I tried it with Hobi,” I said sarcastically, “it’s my favorite one now.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes and said, “I hope our children don’t get your taste in foods.”

“What did you say?” I stopped licking my ice cream.

“You heard me.” He stood up, “Now let’s get moving.”

Once again we were back on the road. Namjoon riding aimlessly forward, speeding up by the time. I hugged him tighter from behind. The wind was rushing towards my face blowing my hair which were sticking out from the helmet. At that moment I had a sudden urge to say it to Namjoon.

“I love you.” I said.

“What?” he was shouting through the sound of the blowing wind, “Did you say something? I couldn’t hear you.”

“I said,” I screamed at the top of my lungs, “I LOVE YOU KIM NAMJOON.”

Yes. It was my first time confessing to him.

*************************************************

Special 8 Photo-folio Masterlist

My Personal Masterlist

True Self - Part 2

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader Genre: Angst with a little fluff Warning: A bit angsty, toxic ARMYs, cyber bullying, swearing etc. Word Count: 1k Words Note: Please bear it in mind that it’s totally fictional. I tried my best to include some of the aspects of Namjoon in here. Personally I think, Namjoon is one of the best men to ever exist. Wish I could do him justice.

Summary: Once you find out that Namjoon is an Idol, you start to see him differently than you did before...

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 [Complete]

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My mother kept denying it saying that Namjoon was trying to prank me until I showed her his profile in Google. It was hard for me to believe it myself at first.

Namjoon told me that he would like to introduce me to his band mates. What? I was going to meet with the biggest band of the world. And I didn’t even know them. I felt like an idiot for never trying out K-pop before.

I spent most of my time streaming their music and other videos which I found too hilarious. I kinda regretted it now for not knowing about these precious gems existing. Now, I could see why people loved BTS from the bottom of their hearts.

The leadership quality in Namjoon was something on another level. He was definitely one of the many reasons of BTS being BTS. I felt somewhat proud for knowing him in person.

One thing that shocked me every time was Namjoon’s ability to produce the most relatable lyrics. Those were the words I had always wanted to say, but better. I felt like, we were one person in mind.

“Does that make him my soul mate?” I thought. Soul mate or not, he was definitely my ideal type; which I had never imagined I would get to meet in real life let alone date him.

I started to see Namjoon in a new light. He was no more just a silly boy who talked about books and nature. He was a superstar, a role model for people to look up to. He was intelligent and artistic. But he was also someone who was out of reach; which I had realized the hard way.

*************************************************

"We were dying to meet you." The one called Hoseok said as soon as Namjoon had introduced me to them.

"Me too!" I said, "I was very excited." Which was partly true. Actually, I was more nervous than excited. I was worried they might find me boring.

Fortunately nothing of the sort happened. I met the Bangtan boys at a restaurant near their house. They had welcomed me and made me very comfortable around them. Soon, we were talking and eating like they had known me for years.

I had learnt that it was extremely rare for them to date anyone because of their busy schedule. They tended to avoid going into relationships to keep it easy.

"But do you know what hyung told me?" Jimin said with a smirk on his face, "He said, ‘Yah, Jimin, I don't think I can keep away from her.’"

"Jimin-ah!" Namjoon yelled at him while the others burst into laughter. I was blushing so hard that I had to cover my face pretending to cough.

At some point, Namjoon had a call and he asked me to excuse him for a moment. When he returned, his face was grave.

"Something came up." He said apologetically, "I’m sorry, darling. I really have to go now."

"It's Okay," I nodded, "Maybe one of the boys can drive me."

It was agreed on that Jin would take me back home. Then, Namjoon left. Even though, we still stayed there for half an hour more, I felt Namjoon's absence every moment. I wasn't enjoying the dinner anymore.

Finally, Jin was giving me a ride as promised. He probably noticed the change in my expression. "You know," he said, "when we said it's hard, we really meant it."

I nodded my head slowly. I understood. It would indeed be hard to date an idol.

*************************************************

“Happy Birthday, darling.” Someone softly placed a kiss on my forehead.

I woke up from the touch and slowly opened my eyes. At first a little blurry, then, I could make up the face in front of me. It was Namjoon. As soon as I recognized him, I pulled him into a tight hug.

“Woah!” He exclaimed, “Hey, calm down. I’m not going anywhere.”

I shook my head as I didn’t let go of him. Namjoon hugged me back and chuckled, “You’re acting like your little sister now.”

I didn’t care. I had met him in person after 2 whole months. We didn’t even get to talk online often. As always, Namjoon was way too busy to make time for our relationship. And I was worried it might fall apart at any time.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you’re coming, huh?” I asked pretending to be furious at him since we had an argument last night.

He put on his best dimple smile and said, “To surprise you, of course.”

“Yeah,” I rolled my eyes, “Showing off how romantic you can get?”

Namjoon spent the whole day with me and my family. Apparently, my mother already knew about his visit, which shocked me since she was incapable of keeping secrets. My little sister was super happy to meet her ‘oppa’ after a long time too. Overall, it was one of the best days I had in a long time.

Namjoon planned a dinner for my birthday at a fancy restaurant. I put on my best dress. I also put on a lot of makeup. When I was finally pleased with my outfit, we sat off for the little date I was longing to have.

The restaurant was beautiful. We got our table at the furthest corner to enjoy some privacy. The food was delicious as well.

“What?” I was completely shocked when Namjoon announced that he was going away tonight.

“I’m really sorry, darling.” He apologized once again, “It was already hard but I still managed to get a day off to celebrate your birthday.”

“I can’t believe it.” I said, “We are meeting after 62 days and you are already leaving in a day.”

“I know it sounds ridiculous.” He tried to laugh it off, “But I promise, next time, I’ll get more time and we’ll go on a long vacation. Does that sound good?”

“Next time!” I whispered.

Namjoon took my hands in his, “I’m really sorry.”

“Can you please stop apologizing already?”

*************************************************

The threats kept coming one after another and so was the mean comments.

“Why don’t you go die in a ditch, you freak!”

“You’re so fucking ugly that you make me puke.”

“How did you make our handsome Namjoon hyung to fall for you, witch?”

Some reporters had found out about us. Now, the news got leaked into the media. And some of his fans couldn’t accept it.

At first, I was crying at night silently. I was a sensitive person. So, every harsh comment felt like a knife through me. Eventually, I became numb towards the hatred. I stopped posting online. Ultimately, I deleted all my social media accounts.

“Don’t worry, darling.” Namjoon would call every day to console me over the situation, “Nothing’s made official. They’ll get tired of it. It will be over soon.”

“Does it even matter?” I asked once.

“Why are you saying that?” Namjoon’s voice sounded as if he was worried.

“If it takes not making our relationship public for the hatred to go away, that means, we will never be official.”

Namjoon was silent for a moment. Then, I added, “Perhaps someday, it will be over for us as well.”

“Don’t you worry about it, darling.” He said, “We will overcome the struggles.”

I wiped a tear from my cheek, “I wish I was as strong as you.”

*************************************************

Special 8 Photo-folio Masterlist

My Personal Masterlist

True Self - Part 1

Fandom: BTS Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader Genre: Fluff Warning: None, I guess? Word Count: 1k Words Note: Please bear it in mind that it’s totally fictional. I tried my best to include some of the aspects of Namjoon in here. Personally I think, Namjoon is one of the best men to ever exist. Wish I could do him justice.

Summary: Meeting Namjoon while you take your sister to the park proves to you that he is the kind of man you’ve always fantasized about...

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 [Complete]

*************************************************

Today, I was in charge of taking my 8 years old sister to the park she frequently went to. My mother usually did the job. Since she didn’t feel too well, I had to take the part.

“Namjoon oppa!” my sister called and ran towards the man I had never met before. But I had heard about him a lot from my mother and he was a perfect gentleman in her eyes. My little sister was fond of him as well. She even told me once that she would gladly exchange me with her ‘oppa’ if given the chance.

Namjoon’s face broke into a smile as he saw her. “Hey, sweetheart.” he said while hugging her gently. There was a hint of confusion on his face when he looked at me.

“I’m her elder sister.” I introduced myself.

“I see,” he shook my hand, “I’ve heard about you.”

I felt embarrassed as I wondered what my mother could possibly have told about me. She was the kind to always brag about me to every single person she met. Though, I see nothing in me to brag about.

Namjoon offered me to sit down. I accepted hesitantly even though my plan was to sit alone and read the last chapter of the book I had brought while my sister would go around the park making new friends.

We both tried to make a simple conversation, which we found too hard to continue. So, we sat there silently, watching my sister play with Namjoon’s dog.

After a while, Namjoon noticed the book, which was poking through my bag and inquired about it. Then, he showed me the book he had brought which gave me an excuse to read mine while he quietly read his.

That was how our first meeting went. When I got back home, my mother wasn’t impressed at all because of how immaturely I had behaved.

*************************************************

I started to take my sister to the park more often. So that I got to meet Namjoon every now and then. He would come to walk his dog sometimes and will always strike up a conversation with me. Sometimes he would bring chocolate, milkshake or ice cream for my sister.

One day, he brought two chocolates with him, gave one to my sister and handed one to me. I gave him a look that said, “Why me?”

Namjoon laughed a little and said, “You mentioned once about how you used to eat lots of chocolates when you were a kid. So, I thought perhaps nobody bring them to you anymore now that you’ve grown up. But I can see through you. You still like them.”

I couldn’t help blushing. He had definitely saw me asking for a bite from my sister whenever I thought he wouldn’t notice. What an embarrassing way to get busted!

From that day on, whenever he would bring something for my sister he would bring one for me as well. At first, I hesitated to accept them. But eventually it turned into a normal act between us.

I started liking Namjoon without realizing it. He was the kind of person to radiate warmth around him. Talking to him started to feel like a stress relief mechanism to me.

I also couldn’t help noticing how clumsy he was. He would often break things and spill drinks on himself and on me as well. Once he even tumbled and fell down while we were walking down a slope.

He would immediately start to apologize and explain to me how he was not very good with his hands and legs. He even mentioned that some people called him a ‘giant baby’ because of his nature. I found it so adorable that I started to call him by that name secretly in my house too.

“Oh dear!” my mother once said, “Don’t tell me you are falling for him.”

“Of course, not!” I said with confidence. Then turned to go to my room, muttering to myself “I hope so…”

*************************************************

We had bonded over our love for books. I found out that he was as eager to buy new books whenever he had the chance as me. We talked for hours about our favorite books, fictional worlds, characters and stories. It was getting dark and my little sister practically begged me to take her back home.

At this point, I was taking her to the park almost every day. And of course, my motive behind it was to meet up with Namjoon. Soon, I realized how less and less frequent his visits were getting. When I had asked him about it, he said, “I’m getting a little too busy with my works lately.”

He only once mentioned about him working for some music company. He had told me that he needed break every now and then from his stressful works. So, whenever he came to walk his dog, he didn’t like to talk about it. I never pushed him either.

“I want to take you out sometimes.” He told me one day; which was really surprising. We had been friends for more than 3 months. But none of us had ever expressed anything more than that by this time.

“Yeah, sure!” I said, “Where to?”

“Maybe at a bookstore?” he suggested. I said it sounded great and we agreed upon a time at a particular day.

As soon as I told my mother about it, she was really excited. She bought me new clothes with matching jewelries. I told her that she was imagining a little too much, that it was supposed to be a friendly hangout.

We met in front of the bookstore at the appointed date and Namjoon handed me the beautiful white flowers he had brought with him. I thanked him and said, “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about buying you flowers too.”

Namjoon smiled at me, “Don’t worry, dear. Buy me some other day.” His dimple smile was enough to melt away all the worries. He looked so different when he smiled that it felt like he was a complete different person.

We had planned to buy each other books that we personally preferred. It was a fun idea. We were roaming around talking about what we liked about the books that we had chosen. And finally, we got out of the shop with loads of books to carry back home.

*************************************************

Next time, I invited him for a coffee and I was the one who brought flowers for him.

“Wow, Sunflowers!” he exclaimed.

“Yeah.” I said casually, “’Cause they are my favorites.”

“No wonder. Pretty people like pretty things.”

I laughed, “Thank you or whatever.”

“Was it too bad?” he asked, “I was just trying to flirt.”

I nodded my head in affirmation, “Don’t even think about it. You’re horrible at this stuff.” Namjoon also started to laugh.

We ordered our coffees and sat there for a really long duration. Time seemed to fly by while I talked with this guy. He was a person I could talk so easily with.

By the end of the date, Namjoon said, “I think you ought to see for yourself the world I live in.”

“What does that mean? Are you from Narnia or something?” I jokingly asked.

He shook his head, smiling with somewhat seriousness, “I mean, my work.”

“Okay.” I said, excited to know.

“It is actually unbelievable that you still haven’t found out about it.” He chuckled, “I am an Idol.”

“You mean as the K-pop?” I asked, totally shocked at the revelation.

Then, Namjoon asked casually, “Do you know BTS?”

*************************************************

Special 8 Photo-folio Masterlist

My Personal Masterlist