Sp Wendy - Blog Posts

alright, im actually pretty proud of this one PAPER SWITCHED TO DIGITAL!!! (style change is crazyy)

i, personally, am not really into stan getting into kyman’s way and trying to stop them from dating, but it seems to be one of the most popular trope for stan in kyman fics. and although i can see the appeal, i prefer another option.

please think about stan who’s actually helping kyman to get together.

so cartman has a big and (as he thinks) unrequited crush on kyle, and he decides that the fastest and most effective way to win kyle’s heart is to get stan’s support since stan and kyle are the best friends. and if you have stan by your side, you can say that half of work here is done.

and as a professional manipulator cartman convinces stan into helping him – he plays the “i’m on my meds & went through therapy” card, he says that stan is the one who gotta understand how broken heart and unmutual feeling hurt, that it’s almost their prom and cartman doesn’t have enough time to hit on kyle properly – and who knows, maybe they won’t even be in touch after kyle enters the university, so cartman has only one chance. he swears on his life he’s never gonna hurt kyle, and he flatters stan by saying he always hated him the least out of all the boys.

and stan as a hopeless romantic and sucker for stories with unmutual crushes finally gives in agreeing to help cartman. bonus if wendy is totally into this idea because a) it’d be amusing to watch them having their drama; b) she supports gay rights and wrongs; c) she think that kyle would be like a good influence for cartman and could “fix him” (my girl has never been so wrong in her entire life)

so they all start a whole new project for making kyle consider cartman as a proper romantic partner.

cartman: Okay. You have to invite him to the cinema BUT you will dump him at the very last minute so he’ll have to go there with me. What movie should we choose?

stan: Uhhh… There’s a new DC movie?

cartman: DUDE! Even I know he’s more of a Marvel fan.

stan: Well, I’m- I’m not supposed to memorize his preferences by heart, you know!

cartman: You’re his best friend?????

btw stanman and candy bonding over there :333

so wendy and stan help him to plan the whole dates, but the minor problem is that they have veeery different understanding of the romance.

wendy: The best way to win his heart and make some obvious hints is to take him out for a romantic dinner in the restaurant!

stan: No way, Kyle’ll hate that! Take him for a basketball game, he loves basketball.

cartman: …Can’t I just invite him to watch “The passion”?

wendy&stan, indignantly: CARTMAN!

cartman: What? It’s symbolic!

so they end up convincing him that kyle is never gonna like cartman if he doesn’t hide his true self, so he has to pretend a lot. he hates this idea, but eventually agrees and starts faking his behaviour being all nice, polite and kind-hearted, but every time their dates become a mess. and kyle seems to react veeery negatively, because even though he thought he wanted cartman to change, and he’s supposed to be happy that cartman is finally acting like a decent normal person – deep down he can’t get rid of this vague feeling that something is wrong, that he’s faking. and it irritates him so much he gets more and more angry and yells at cartman almost every time, even though there are no visible reasons for that.

and one day cartman just freaks out because he’s tired of faking, and if kyle doesn’t like the real cartman, than fuck him. and he finally asks him out the way he truly wanted – with mean jokes, rude behaviour, they just go to kfc and then sit at home watching dumb horror movies in cartman’s bedroom. and that was the first time they kissed – the first time in a long time when kyle saw cartman’s real self. and oh boy did he missed it.

kyle and wendy being just regular friends or rivals and not liking each other sure is fun but imagine them bonding over their lovehate to cartman. imagine cartman having to fight them both. this brosistp has SO much comedy potential.

hey vita!! really like your posts and REALLY want to know what are you hiding away from us about wendy + heidi you seem to like them but i didnt see you talk about them much sooo what do you have on your mind about them?

ok first of all IM NOT HIDING 😭😭 i genuinely love them and well okay some headcanons!!

• after breaking up with cartman, heidi had a lot of (and i mean it) anger issues and hatred bottled up inside of her that she had no idea how to deal with. after she couldn’t just fight with eric like she used to did, she kept all those negative emotions inside, occasionally bursting with anger and starting to shout at everyone around her and becoming quite insufferable. wendy couldn’t tolerate this behaviour among girls – not to mention they already hated heidi enough to avoid her most of the time – so she suggested heidi to start boxing with her. at first heidi thought that was a stupid idea and wendy was just messing with her, but eventually she agreed and started taking boxing lessons with wendy. the classes were not really popular, so the only people heidi actually knew there were heidi and tweek. all three of them started doing this to let out their inner anger with the least possible harm caused.

• heidi and wendy got pretty close because of this, they started spending more and more time together. they were pretty similar deep inside and although heidi still couldn’t become the same pure and kind girl she used to be, wendy did see that they had a lot of in common – they were both pretty concerned about justice, for example – wendy mostly cared about social inequality, while heidi, who was an eco activist, tried to protect the planet, ecology and animals. hehehe they made a really powerful duo!!

• wendy was the one who heidi shared her doubts about her sexual orientation with, because she knew wendy would support her. and wendy did. she did support her, but ever since then she couldn’t get rid of this intrusive little thought in her head, a vague hope. “she likes girls. does it include me?”. and she was terrified of this because before heidi she never even considered being something other than straight. so yep she went through a whole orientation crisis before finally admitting she could be in love with heidi <3

• also a very weird friendship group i can’t stop thinking about is wendy+heidi+kyle+tweek because i feel they would get along so well i neeeeed their interactions

u don’t get it i NEED to see candy interactions i need them to team up and become the most powerful duo to ever exist

cartman: Hey, for a girl you’re kinda good at making evil plans, huh.

wendy: Yes, and you’re quite ok for a fat racist misogynistic bigoted stupid piece of shit.

cartman, shrugging: Who would expect we’d make such a good team.