Stranger Things X - Blog Posts

Stages of grief ft billy Hargrove x reader

You and billy have been on edge for weeks, rumors spread that you slept with Harrington and he’s been fooling around with some girls. Both rumors were false but both of you had a nagging feeling. You both didn’t want to be betrayed or taken advantage of so it ate both you up. The time you both spent together was short do you the pain of either thinking one laid with an enemy, the interaction at school were short. When either didn’t visit in the night you both had thoughts of the other being with that other person. Because of the tension for months both of you snapped at first starting it off as a couple who needed to fix their problems to a full on screaming match and both saying things they didn’t mean and putting either under the bus, you went on the fact he was a player before the dating phase to him saying you slept with Harrington since day one because you both hung out more before the dating. “ ooo so that’s what you think y/n “ you glare back “ it’s what I know billy” he groans/screams “ you really playing this card y/n ever fight, I can’t catch a break” you slam ur hand down “ I can’t catch a break either because you can’t get over your pride about Harrington” the fact you said his name sent billy even further over the edge, he got in your face through his clenched teeth. Nothing but venom dripped from his mouth only for you to poison it more. He called you every name in the book going as far as to comment on your looks only for you to spew back a rush of hateful comments both you brought family even personal secrets into the argument. By the time the last word left your mouth it all was a blur, broken items and car doors slamming, the news of the break up spread like wildfire. You both didn’t even dare look at the other feelings nothing for the first month. You only knew of a new girl on his arm from a class mate and the fact you cut off everyone seeing as they brought the rumors and lies. By the second it didn’t hit either till you looked in the mirror and finally broke, billy didn’t break till he laid next to a girl. He looked over not understanding why he really expected you to be right their. The night you both fought flooded both your minds. The feeling of a void entered both your chests, you broke sliding down your wall as tears fell in floods as your heart started to hurt. You screamed out and held your chest feeling it all hit, the man you wanted to spend your life with had left and laid with another, the thoughts of what he said broke you more, the pain was unbearable. Only miles away billy sat in his car near the lake you both would go, bottle in hand and tears flooding his eyes. He’s head lean on the seat and his fists clenched the bottle, he had been seven drinks in and the more the liquor filled him the more it unlocked the night and his his passenger seat was empty, his back seat had no shoes, his dash didn’t hold the picture of you, the necklace you gifted didn’t dangle from the mirror. The stages of grief set in. Denial was the period of not really believing it till, one entered their room to find the one thing from the other gone or when one wanted to tell the other something only to remember the situation, the empty sheets,the pillow that lost the other scent only for Anger to set in the thought of the others betrayal and lack of trust, the fact you both spent a year together just to not trust the other filled each with rage. Bargaining the guilt for what was said, the shame, the anxiety all set in at once, most nights crying was over what was said both feelings evil and dirty for saying something they didn’t mean only to have depression set in hard both turning to a drink or cigarette to calm the nerves or hide the sadness neither would dare step in each other’s paths, everyone knew because the once bright school was sitting on the edge of their seats. By the fifth month acceptance wasn’t a find yourself or a recreation it was the sadness finally setting in, the acceptance that the other wouldn’t return or dare too because it’s Been half a year. Billy finally broke after seeing you at school,

he never looked at you but when he finally got the courage he stared at you seeing your eyes lifeless, you looked frail and tired, as you sat with friends you looked disconnected. Broken. It made him want to move across the room and hold you and fill you with life again only to see you stand and leave the room. He wanted to chase you. He got up moving to the hall seeing it empty as you walked down it, he moved faster only wrapping his arms around you from behind head on top of yours confused you froze only to sink into him once the familiar smell came to you, you spoke softly as if to speak a little louder would make him disappear “ billy”. He pulled you into a empty/ abandoned classroom. You dropped your bag turning hiding in his chest as his grip tightened, neither spoke knowing each pain, you cried lightly on his chest as he kept you close, only hearing each other’s heart beat rapidly and breathing fill the room. You look up into his eyes find them clear ice blue clear just everything you missed and loved about him on full display, the slight stumbles of hair his freckles in their funny order on his lightly pink cheeks, you didn’t know what came over you but up moved up quickly kissing him deeply, you’ve shared kisses with him but this one was full of the grief, the void, the lost time to lost months. Only to have him lean on a desk with his hand behind your head lips just as connected. It was like you both spilled your broken hearts out onto the floor, the muscles that were tenses now relax the tears that were held in now falling freely. Both pulled away gasping “please “ was all you could muster before both held each other in a hug “ forgive me “ even through it all you both stood speechless. Seeing sides of the other you’ve never seen. You hold his hand as he pulls you closer kissing your nose gently and humming “ why did we do this” you only smile “ young and dumb “ he cups your cheek, you feel his rings on your jaw and smell the cigarette as he kisses you deeply “ young, dumb but never apart” you hum cupping his hand on your face “ till death” he smiles “ do us part”.