Transblr - Blog Posts
I'm already 3 months on hrt but I need more friends to forcefem me in like. Mundane ways.
Learning how to use a round hairbrush to give my hair volume. how to dress cute/flatteringly for my body shape (tho its probably gonna change soon). I've never worn makeup before and that needs to change. Forcefeed me my estradiol/anti-androgen medications (don't forget my vitaminD). Please help me figure out the products I need for a proper skincare routine.
I'm dying out here. Being a first time girl on her own requires so much research. Though it is so rewarding
I’ve been on HRT for over five years now, and while my life may not be perfect, it brings me immense happiness that I’ve been experiencing the joy of being a girl for so long.
So the moral thing to do is find others to grant that joy to, right? They’ll thank me eventually!
Yeah!! Exactly!
I've received more compliments in the 3 months I've been on feminizing HRT than I ever did in the 21 years I was a boy.
Compliments on my accessories, my clothes, my hair, my eyes, my smell.
Kinda weird. Really hard not to notice.
I have this arbitrary line I need to cross before I can congratulate myself and come out as trans to my friends and family. I just need to think im pretty for longer than a fleeting second. I need to live a day feeling pretty and go to sleep feeling pretty and wake up again to feel pretty again. And then maybe I'll be able to say "I'm ready".
But what if that agency is taken from me? What if I am pushed before I'm comfortable. What if my breasts grow too large to keep hidden. Or my parents ask me about my girlish tendencies before I even begin to think about how to discuss it with them?
I dont know what to do then. I'll bumble through it and need to live uncomfortably until I hit that arbitrary milestone that dictates when I can be myself, unapologetically, anywhere and everywhere.
It hurts being called a son. A boyfriend. A nephew. A grandson. Referred to as a "Lord" at a renfaire instead of a Lady. It makes my heart sink and my gut wretch. Whatever positive energy I have flushes away.
But I can't bear the discomfort of living my truth in a way that makes myself cringe, because if I cringe others will too. It's silly. So many braver souls do it, and with such confidence that I am jealous and dream fantasies where I live their lives.
It's fine. I'll manage. Someday I'll meet my arbitrary milestone. One day my mother will have a daughter.
I bought a pretty circlet today. My husband says it makes me look like an elf :)) I love it!
I also bought a Jester's cap. It is Black&White and has annoying bells and I will be wearing it to Dungeons & Dragons sessions!
Been reading a book over the last few days called 'How To Think Like A Woman' by Regan Penaluna. I've never been so inspired and also angered by someone else's writing before. I feel so inspired by Penaluna's writing and memoir, as well as the stories of the women she's recounted so far as I've read. What upsets me is how blind I've been to 2000+ years of nearly every major philosopher you've ever heard of being a massively misogynistic prick, and how that's affected civilization as a whole. No matter how much good they may have done for philosophy, politics, etc, what's been hidden from history classes are their vitriol-saturated opinions of women. Despite being hidden from modern eyes in order to keep the good moral image of these philosophers in proper condition, they still had massive impacts on the culture of their day and decades or centuries into their future. For my whole life I had this kind of blasé attitude to Philosphy like it was just a bunch of dudes theorizing about the nature of life, and while it is that (simplified), it is also very dangerous because these philosophers (VERY OFTEN MALE) would hold wide influence over many and their ideas became the basis for communities and civilization moving forward. Their grand plans for humanity and their ideals that humanity should strive for were really only meant to prop up the egos of men, and to keep women subservient.
One of the things that stuck with me and bothered me most was this notion that seemed to be a commonality between many of these "great thinkers", which was - "It is virtuous for a woman to be silent, but not for a man, a man should always speak his mind."
That one kinda killed me a bit. To shared that near carbon-copied sentiment over the course of centuries, misogynist philosopher begeting misogynist philosopher for 2 millenia and some change. It kills me a bit inside. It makes me angry.
What does it mean to become radicalized?
Alright, which one of you fucks made terfblr an actual tag. We will have words. Who knows… maybe something more…. (Beating the shit out of you)
Being an asexual trans woman is funny because it my existence invalidates the idea that being trans is a fetish.
Like I don't have fetishes and I'd rather jump in a volcano than have sex but some people are dumb enough to think it IS a sex thing🤷♀️
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