Transphobia - Blog Posts

 The cycle of “invisible” oppression in the LBGT+ community:

You face sexual abuse, workplace discrimination, medical discrimination, and violence

It never gets reported, or is lumped in with the statistics of a different oppressed group.

Data and “proof” regarding your discrimination is spotty or nonexistent as best, so nobody advocates for you or talks about it in the media

Other LGBT+ people don’t personally hear about it, so they claim it doesn’t exist/they have it worse while dismissing and denying your personal experiences.

The discrimination continues to happen unopposed

This isn’t me arguing that hypervisibility is any better. It goes without saying that the hypervisibility of certain groups (Trans women, gay men, etc) contributes to their oppression, and has made things incredibly dangerous for them right now.

I just want people to acknowledge the dangers of invisibility as well.

Trans men, intersex people, nonbinary people, asexual people… There are so many groups in the LGBT+ community who get left behind and ignored while society tries to eradicate us.

You need to care about people like us, too. Please include other identities in your advocacy. We can't have trans/queer unity until you acknowledge and support ALL of us.

you notice how even when transandrophobes strain their brains to come up with One Nice Thing to say about trans men, it's always some version of "they are useful to me"? Like, "oh it's a shame all trans men are mras now, they'd be good for a fuck otherwise" "i used to know this cool trans man who helped me realise my own identity back in the day, too bad they all suck now" "my trans men friends say it's totally okay for me to say these things about their demographic because they're cool and normal". Never even about general contributions to culture, it's canonical that trans men are completely incapable of producing anything of value after all, not about activism, just what trans men have done or could do to specifically benefit them personally. It's really revealing of the actual motives behind opposing trans mens self-advocacy.

I am only going to respond to this once, because I’ve found it isn’t productive to argue with people online about what terms certain queer people are allowed to coin and use.

You clearly have some internalized transphobia you need to work out. You have an incredibly patronizing and dismissive attitude towards trans men and transmascs. You reblog from people who are actively hateful and bigoted, not just towards trans men, but nonbinary and intersex people as well. You reblog posts talking about how much you want to fuck trans men while dismissing their concerns, which comes of as fetishistic.

Being trans yourself does not give you a free pass to act this way.

It doesn’t matter if you think the term “transandrophobia” is valid or not, or if you claim it comes from problematic roots.

You are not a trans man. You are not part of their community. You do not get to say what words they get to use, and they do not need your permission to discuss their oppression. You do not get to say what they do or do not experience, because you do not KNOW their experiences, and you clearly aren’t willing to listen to the ones that disagree with you.

Look at the replies and reblogs here, how many people are saying your attitude towards trans men is insulting and demeaning. Regardless of your opinion on the word transandrophobia, you are behaving inappropriately. This much is clear.

Additionally, you are dismissing not just the struggles of trans men, but intersex and nonbinary people as well. The supreme court is actively hurting these groups, and your refusal to acknowledge this shows that either you are ignorant of the struggles of other LGBT+ identities, or you just don't care.

You are not immune to holding transphobic and bigoted ideals. Everybody in this society has them regardless of identity, and it’s your job to acknowledge your biases and unlearn them. Learn to support the rest of the LBGT+ community outside of the groups you belong to, or at least work on your own internalized transphobia before you try to join these discussions.

Fighting for your rights is not like sharing a pie. I promise you can care about transmisogyny and the issues trans women are facing without dismissing the concerns of your transgender brothers and siblings.

Trans men I love you. Trans-androphobia is not real. Putting ‘trans-‘ on a phenomenon that doesn’t exist does not describe a new thing. What you’re facing is overlapping transphobia and misogyny. I’m sorry people online got mad at you for saying it’s that, but it’s that.

. You are men, regardless of if you dress fem. Bigots and sexists don’t see you as the man you are, or even as trans. It’s not in a “transgender” way they hate you; they see us as bad men or women, to correct however violently the group finds. Which is misogyny. It’s obvious to me, a trans woman who doesn’t easily pass, that misogynists see trans people simply as bad male/females.

Cis women who don’t do femininity (at least the patriarchy’s standards) are treated the same BY THESE PEOPLE as trans men; as something to correct into an incubator. Lesbians, hairy and fat women, racialized women, strong and confident women receive these same things. Women whose muscles are visible are told that their strength makes them ugly. Which is misogyny. And the disgusting things people say about T’s effects on you is rooted in that.

Trans men I love you. I’m sorry that everyone parrots that men are also affected by patriarchy, yet you feel unease at using the word misogyny. Misandry and androphobia are words for League of Legends players though.

Trans men I love you. You do not want your issues to be a Supreme Court decision removing specifically your personhood, nor do I. What you face is misogyny. Let’s call it that, and face it together 💖

With my issues having been ignored for 21 years, I’d rather it than at very best, everyone around me debating how much I should exist in public.

Being part of a marginalized group does not give you a free pass to say bigoted things about another marginalized group.

Bigots in the tag, with their full chest: "Trans men only use the word transandrophobia to complain about trans women!"

Actual posts in the tag:

"My ex assaulted me when I came out as trans, because he thought getting me pregnant would make me stop taking T."

"My mom told me that transitioning would make me aggressive and sexist, because testosterone is an evil hormone."

"I wish people here were nicer to trans men. It feels like the farther along I get in my transition, the more I am excluded by the LGBT+ community."

Like, go ahead and say you've never actually listened to a trans man when he's talking about his oppression. Transandrophobia is NOT about trans women, it's about the struggles trans men and transmascs face.

Them having a word doesn't hurt you, stop being a massive pissbaby.

Hey we all know pronouns aren't a privilege, right?

It doesn't matter how "annoying" a trans person is, it doesn't matter if they disagree with you on some intracommunity issue-

Use the pronouns they have in their bio, or the pronouns they ask you to use. Even if you really don't like them, or you think they're problematic.

Your comfort with somebody's pronouns isn't a factor. Using ANY other pronoun for a user that prefers it/its is misgendering. Same with neopronouns. If you can't manage it, don't talk to it.

Oh and just to be clear-

Claiming that a trans woman's account is actually "run by a man" is misgendering. Saying a trans man's blog is part of some "secret terf circle" is misgendering. Pretending a person is actually your oppressor in disguise so you can misgender them is, get this, misgendering!

I don't care how much you dislike someone, use the right fucking pronouns.

If you want people in the transandrophobia tag to post less about inter community issues, you have two options:

1. Make your own posts about non-community issues

2. Speak up when other queer people: make fun of trans men and trans mascs, deny transandrophobia, say one type of trans person has it worse than all other trans people, erase/leave out/forget trans men and mascs in their activism, deny the lived experiences of trans men and mascs

It stings worse when betrayal comes from someone you thought was an ally, so I’m really not surprised a lot of posts about transandrophobia are talking about inter community issues.

They say we can't reclaim "tranny" as if they haven't called our voices "tranny voice" for years, as if they haven't called us "tranny dykes" forever, as if cis people actually care who they hit with that word. I have been called "tranny," I have been called it in multiple languages, in many ways, people in my high school used it to attack me like any other trans person, queer people did. People used it to mock, to hurt, aggrivate, to try to bond.

But they push us out of feminist spaces because suddenly we don't understand anymore, they push us out of sapphic spaces because they deem our bodies gross, our self-expression wrong, and now they push us out of trans spaces because we don't suffer enough. I wonder how much more pain I am supposed to shoulder before it will be enough for it to be deemed worth talking about, for it to be deemed worth discussing, reclaiming.

Because we have the bi experience, the ace, and inter experience: every side turns us away. We're too queer and too damaged, and then we're not queer enough, haven't suffered enough.

All this when you won't even let us talk about our pain in our own voices. How will you ever know it if you never listen; if you make us afraid to talk?

we do not "love" to bring this up. it is traumatic. it is dysphoria inducing. it is capable of taking the lives of trans men/mascs that are forced to bring a child into this world against their will. stop fucking invalidating our trauma and oppression you absolute fucking transphobic asshole.

no one is fucking saying this is a privilege for trans women/fems. you are making up arguments in your head because you cannot handle the fact that you are being so disgustingly transphobic toward us so you have to pretend we are saying shit that was never said.

i will not be fucking silent about this. no trans men/mascs should be forced into silence when bringing up our very real systemic oppression. if it bothers you, then look inward.

The thing with like aphobia and transandrophobia and stuff is like

sometimes. you are going to see people complaining about oppression. and it's going to make you feel bad and uncomfortable. because you yourself are oppressed and in these circles you are used to being The Oppressed One and seeing these other complains about People Including You reminds you of actual bigotry in broader spaces, or makes you doubt your own oppression, or just makes it feel like you're being told you 'have it easy'.

but. that's not what's happening. what's happening is just that other people also have systematic problems and deserve to talk about it.

that is not an attack on you.

oppression is not a zero-sum game. Aspecs, or trans men, being better acknowledge as suffering from oppression, does not mean that you have it any less bad than you have known yourself to do.

it doesn't even mean that they have it 'worse'. It means exactly what I said: that they also have issues that they need help with and are worth discussing.

If that upsets the basis of your own understand of your oppression... yeah. maybe that means your understanding was wrong. sorry.

but it's only the THEORETICAL UNDERSTANDING that has been upset. your oppression is still not in any kind of question.

is that easy to understand or carry forth? no.

but it's necessary.

and it has happened, over and over again. When gay people and trans people were at head to head, both presenting the other as predatory sexual deviants and themselves as 'normal'. When gay men diminished lesbians' suffering because they were less likely to get on the news for being murdered than gay men. when bisexuals (within Tumblr's own history!!!!!!) were widely panned as possessing 'straight-passing privilege' and therefore never in the same 'category' of oppression as gay men and lesbians.

it happens over and over and over again. and it's always hard. but it always needs to happen, morally.

even if the people expressing their oppression are 'too aggressive'. even if their arguments make you feel uncomfortable and scared. even if the place you belonged no longer feels like home anymore.

it'd be nice if every time something happened that made you feel bad, it was because of somebody Bad who needs to be Stopped and/or Punished. but that just isn't the case.

an oppressed group (and we can judge this by statistics; it's really not that difficult) talking about their oppression is not causing actual harm to you. and even if they were, they still deserve to be able to do it.

Dreamed that my parents were going to give a power point presentation about my gender identity at some sort of conference.

In the presentation, my mom was contending that I was actually an addict, addicted to the idea of being transgender, and that if I went into recovery like a drug or alcohol addict, then I wouldn't want to transition anymore.

I edited the power point to include a bullet point stating that "the subject thinks this theory is a load of bullshit."

I guess working in rehab is rubbing off on my unconscious mind.

My masterlist against KOSA, and the genocide occyring because of the Israel & Gaza war (please check this out and the links involved along with the ones below):

https://www.tumblr.com/hnyflwrr/743159196057501696/httpschngitdppyttg2bk-this-is-a-petition

Links against transphobia and fighting for Nex Benedict and trans kids.

https://youtu.be/GejyQV46Vps

https://www.tumblr.com/nando161mando/743149539680190464/boston-massachusetts-and-nearby-bostons-lgbtq

https://www.tumblr.com/strangerthingscharityzine/743149378581233664/the-events-in-oklahoma-over-the-past-weeks-have

https://www.tumblr.com/that-bisexual/743174499796664320/nex-benedict

https://www.tumblr.com/homoquartz/743145441144733696/why-is-no-one-talking-about-the-fact-that-nex