Have yourself a pretty decent little Christmas, a not-so-bad Hanukkah, a mediocre Hogswatch, and/or a reasonably happy Whatever You’re Having. Enjoy it in your own way, whether that’s glittery or gloomy. You certainly don’t need my permission, but if you want someone to say, “Yes, it’s ok if this year isn’t the best, the brightest, the most amazing ever,” I’m here for you. (And if it is the best and brightest and most amazing, that’s ok, too.)
I was looking at making a family christmas card for the first time in our eight years of being a family, and i feel. just. kinda bummed out. all these cards on shutterfly are foil-stamped and covered in glitter and say things like “merriest christmas,” “happiest holidays,” “best year ever,” “awesomest year ever.” and maybe for some people it was. but this wasn’t our glitteriest happiest merriest awesomest year. and i know it wasn’t the happiest merriest awesomest year for a lot of other people too.
for me one of the crappiest parts of commercialized christmas culture is all this pressure to make it pretty. to be the -est: the best, the merriest, the happiest. like if you go get professional photos taken at a christmas tree farm with wavy hair and coordinating outfits and put those photos on a embossed glittery card then somehow it erases the fact that your wife lost her job or your new baby spent three months in the nicu.
why isn’t it ok to just have a mediocre christmas? why isn’t it ok to have a christmas card that just says plain old “happy holidays” with a mediocre pixelated cell phone pic of your family where the toddler isn’t wearing pants and you have your glasses on and no one matches? why isn’t it ok to say this ISN’T going to be the merriest christmas? that no one is getting the shinest newest cell phone or toy because dad is in the hospital and we can’t afford it? that some families are tired and stressed to even put up a tree or hang up lights?
when you can’t do Big Best Christmas the way all those perfect families on instagram do christmas, the way all those families in commercials and sitcoms do christmas, it starts to make you feel. like. left out. like your little bit of christmas isn’t enough. like your twenty-dollar plastic tree with tinsel and two ornaments isn’t enough. like your .99 cent felt stockings with names glitter-glued on isn’t enough.
the world chants joy!! merry!! bright!! stocking stuffers!!! and you just feel alienated because the world is bellowing CHRISTMAS!! at you through a megaphone but all you want is just to whisper it quietly this year. not every year is going to be your best christmas ever. christmases aren’t an escalating crescendo of personal happiness and fulfillment. some years will be harder than others. i just want it to be a normal, good, happy thing to just have a little christmas.