Latest Posts by borntoexplore11-blog - Page 8
an invitation you can’t refuse || hawks
hawks x reader warnings: 18+ yandere, death, blood, injury (no smut just yandere hawks) summary: the purge happens once a year, yandere’s are let loose to play to their hearts content for a whole day. the only rule? they can’t kill their darlings. wc: 3.2k
a/n: part of a lovesick server collab be sure to check out the other au’s and characters! thanks @10millionyearsdungeon and @tomurasprincess for beta reading! i appreciate you both endlessly. this is a bit heavy so be sure to read the warnings,, link to a fluffy/smut sleepy hawks drabble below!
The moment you saw the letter placed delicately on your kitchen table, your stomach seized, and your heart dropped. The beige envelope was christened with a blood-red wax seal, staring back at you tauntingly. To the left, there was a vase filled with red spider lilies. Running to your door, you checked the knob. It was still locked. You run to every corner of the house frantically, looking for how somebody got inside.
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Tamaki is the sweetest cinnamon roll ever!
Tamaki Amajiki x Reader
Warnings: angst
I‘m here
It was happening again.
He saw you.
You were in that building saving the last person in there.
You got the kid out of there.
Then the building collapsed.
He was just able to watch.
He wanted to help you, scream at you to get out of there.
Heck, he even considered telling you to let the kid stay in there just so that you would be safe.
But he wasn’t able to do anything.
The scenery switched, you were in a hospital bed.
Badly wounded. Hurt. And not conscious.
Your heart rate was slowing down, your breathing getting more shallow.
Then it stopped.
A doctor and a few nurses were trying to save you, bring you back to him, but they weren’t able to.
You were dying and no one was able to help.
Normally he would wake up now, sitting up straight, only to have an anxiety attack and not realising that you’re next to him, peacefully sleeping.
But not this time.
This time he felt someone slightly shaking him.
When he opened his eyes he saw that you were the one shaking him, probably to wake him up.
”Tama are you okay? You are crying...“
He touched his cheek and felt that he indeed, was crying.
”were you having a nightmare again?“
You knew him too well.
He thought he wasn’t that obvious.
He didn’t tell you about his nightmare. Him seeing you die every night now.
But you were not stupid.
Of course you noticed how panicked he looked in his sleep. How relieved he looked when he saw you wake up. How he would hug you tighter and longer in the morning.
How scared he was when you guys were called to a rescue mission.
”you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. Just know that I’m here and am listening if you feel ready.“
You hugged him.
This small action made him realise how lucky he is to have you by his side.
He started crying. Body shaking and breathing broken.
”sshhhh... it’s okay, I’m here... let it all out...“
He felt you patting his head, playing with his hair and whispering sweet nothing in his ear.
He held you tight. Not wanting to let you go, still not having really realised that you’re fine and it was, once again, just a dream.
”y-you were-” his voice broke. He wanted to tell you what was happening in his dream but his crying got in the way.
”it’s okay... take your time...“
”you- you were-” his crying got worse.
He really wanted to tell you, he wanted to let you know what was waking him up at night and scaring him so much that he was crying like that.
You took his face in your hands and looked him in the eyes. They were red and puffy, tears still streaming down his cheeks with no end.
”it’s okay. Don‘t force yourself.“
He nodded slightly and pulled you close again.
He buried his head in the crook of your neck, tickling you slightly with his soft hair.
You pulled away again, holding his face like before but kissing him this time.
The kiss was a bit salty because of his tears, but you couldn’t care less at the moment.
The kiss actually calmed Tamaki down a bit so he tried to tell you again about his dream.
”Y-you were dying... you tried to save a child but then the building collapsed... the doctors couldn’t save you... you- you died in front of me... I-I wasn’t able to help you...“
His crying got worse again, breaking off his words and keeping him from seeing your smile.
”It’s okay...“
”No it’s not! You died and i was useless! I was just standing there! I saw the building collapse!“
He didn’t want to yell at you, but he couldn’t understand why you weren’t mad at him for letting you die.
You on the other hand couldn’t understand why he was blaming himself for that.
You flinched slightly at his loud voice, pulling him in for another hug.
”it’s not your fault Tama. I know it hurts but you can’t save everyone... please don’t blame yourself...“
”I-I just don’t want you to leave me...“
”i won’t. It was just a dream remember? I’m here. I’m save and if anything would happen to me you would save me.“
”B-but what if I can’t... what if that dream becomes reality...“
”then I will fight for my life. I won’t leave you Tamaki“
You pulled away from him again just to kiss him. His breathing was almost normal again and his crying had stopped, the tears left on his cheeks slowly drying before you wiped them off with your thumbs.
”It’s okay... see? I’m right here. You don’t have to worry.“
You pulled him into a hug again and laid down with him.
With you holding him he finally had a night without this dream again.
I wonder what they are dreaming about...
(via)
I can’t stop rereading this!
Interchangeable
Bully!College AU!Hawks x Reader | 12.2k words
Summary: Hawks is the only person who knows about your suicide attempt. Hawks is also the reason for your suicide attempt. He takes responsibility.
TW’s for suicide, depression, angst, guilt
I can’t call this a yandere story despite it being linked to Intertwined. There’s only perhaps two things that you could say are “yandere”,Hawks actually cleans up his act in this one. It’s a little more traditionally romantic.
IMPORTANT Story note, read fully: This won’t make much sense if you haven’t read Intertwined. this is not a chronological sequel to Intertwined, it’s more like another route that could’ve been taken. What I recommend doing is rereading up to the point where reader is phoning her parents about moving colleges, as this is where -for this fic- Intertwined stops and Interchangeable begins. You can read this without any of the yandere stuff, technically.
For those of us not wanting to reread, Hawks is at the point where he is still bullying the reader. The container incident hasn’t happened, Hawks hasn’t confessed his feelings.
We also assume a couple of things about the reader from Intertwined, we assume she’s depressed and that it’s at least partly due to Hawks.
Not so important A/N: the alternate summary for this is “Hawks daddy-doms you into getting better”. but there’s no daddy kink I swear. There is also no smut! Squeaky clean, as Jesus intended. I just wanna rip your heart out a little, that’s all.
this is awkward and im sorry that i can’t write angst or conventional romance. really bros… im just practising
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Alone in your apartment, you sat in the bathroom, still dressed in your pyjamas as you listened to the tap dripping into the sink.
This was the dead end.
You couldn’t move colleges, only drop out and abandon the scholarship.
With a sense of self worth that had been deteriorating over the past seven years, you were left to bask in hatred and misery from your situation. There was no way you could stand another day of torment; your own humiliation from not being able to avoid it and the voice that perpetually mocked you.
You fiddled with the cuff of your pyjama bottoms. You were wasting time.
Nothing ever seemed to feel like it was worth doing. You’d constantly find yourself giving up in the middle of tasks or simply not taking them on at all, resorting yourself to lying in bed or pausing, standing there and waiting for motivation that never came. But this, this was doable.
When you looked over to the digital clock perched on your bathroom cabinet, you deduced that you were supposed to be at a lecture in five minutes. You weren’t going to go.
Just a little longer.
No note. Let them wonder.
You got up and opened the cabinet.
———
“Can you call her? Text her?”
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Lazy doggo is the best doggo
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