Latest Posts by dontkickmyshin - Page 5

ok because I have wolf keum brainrot and chapter263 reconfirmed that he was practically unknown, prior to his entry to the union- i just wanna know what his backstory is (asking for the hundredth time).

like, it's so off that someone like wolf, who gets into fistfights regularly, managed to remain inconspicuous throughout middle school, enough that most people didn't even know what he looked like prior to his union debut. he has pastel purple hair.

the only plausible explanation i can think of is that he wasn't getting into fistfights regularly in middle school, which is also weird because every flashback we have of him from then is of him fighting?

i've been rereading weak hero season 2 since the latest chapter dropped and i have some things to say about donald

spoilers under the cut

okay first of all i am so fucking pissed at seopass😭😭i can't really say much about the storytelling aspect of choosing to allow donald to die but honestly it does feel very sudden and just unfair to his character. perhaps the suddenness is my reaction because all this time it seemed like he just couldn't die, then he had had the whole arc in the final battle where we finally see a vulnerable side of him and get his full backstory, then all of a sudden he dies?? it just feels so incomplete, like the build up was for nothing🙁🙁🙁.

second of all, i'm only realising just how sad his backstory is now that i'm rereading it.

it's not just about his mother being ill, his father being abusive, and being bullied in school but also the loss of innocence in young donald. at first he was so sweet and cute, but by the time he's thirteen, he's also got a whole baby gang going, beating people up and even doing breaking and entering in one instance, taking his step father's money. then he exposes the dirt on his ex teacher and had myles joo and his boys beat him up, and smash his car outside of the school.

it also reminds me of how much donald has grown- now he would never b&e or smash an adult's car so recklessly (though ofc he did it originally knowing he couldn't get the police called on him). though still heavily involved with delinquents, violence and crime, his methods have refined as he grew, and you can see him become more calculated and less uncouth. despite the maturity of his actions at 13, in a way they're still childish, and it's a reminder that even if he's acting tough he's still a baby🙁🙁

while i was glad to watch those people get their comeuppance, i honestly felt so heartbroken watching their callous and flippant nature to crime. like, he literally has a baby face!!! he's like 5'0!!! and he's here stomping people in alleyways and committing burglary?!!! it reminded me of kaz brekker from SOC for some reason, who was innocent and naive till he had to grow up at 12 or 13 and started hustling people in gambling dens and getting in trouble with the law.

it hurts to watch how cruelly he was treated by his teachers and his schoolmates because of his poverty, and how no one did anything about it because it was just normal to them that in a school full of rich kids, it was just a given that donald was considered less than trash. then at night he was kicked out by his step father so he could cheat and drink and he had to wander around yeongdeungpo all on his own in the cold, hungry, and huddle under an apartment block?? ARE YOU JOKING😭😭

he changed so much due to the circumstances of his situation and he grew into something no one should ever have to. he isn't just strong and smart and always five steps ahead becaude of his natural talent (though that definitely helped), but because he had to be. doing badly has never been a choice for him. he needs it to survive. i've always liked donald, and i've always suspected this about his character, but hearing it be confirmed just makes me like him more.

it's so sad realising how everything about him was manufactured to fit his image- his piercings, his hair, his clothes, his tattoos, his image, the way he talks- he didn't even LIKE any of them, but they just became a part of who he was nevertheless. thinking about the way he found his tattoos repulsive when they were all over his body, and were the first things he saw whenever he looked in the mirror must've been so painful to him. but he probably thought being affected by it made him weak so🙁.

and finally, the end where it shows his attachment and love for his inner child who was never loved or taken care by anybody and had to fend for his own. the image of the older donald, covered in tattoos taking care of his small, crying younger self is so powerful😭😭like look at this i wanna kms

i wonder in another life how donald na would turn out if none of these things happened to him🙁🙁he wanted to be a NASA engineer you know🙁🙁🙁😭😭😭he had his own dreams

other things that i noted were that donald actually changes in public a lot. like seriously a lot....first on the rooftop then in the library, like this guy was just stripping at every opportunity.

and also that him not inviting gilshin and jimmy bae into the union was done on purpose as a technique to make them more willing to join? what?? that's so smart😭😭

i also found out this way that myles was a member of the union before it was even called the union?? like they rode together for three years and donald still beat his ass like damn! he is unsentimental.

i'm going to write something about the funeral chapter but that deserves its own post

honestly, if Donald had to die for the sake of the plot, the truck was not the way to go. He could've died of internal bleeding from all the hits he took. He could've died of an incidental overdose of his medication because he wasn't put together after the fight. He could've purposefully attempted suicide instead of dying by happenstance. You can tell he wasn't all there when he stood in the middle of the road and refused to move, but still. I don't like it.

*SIGNAL BOOST PLEASE*

I am looking for an Andrea Duncan and a Shannon Douglas that went to St. Andrews Public School in Cambridge, Ontario circa 2007. Please reply to this post if you have any info about them!

IM GOING TO CRY THEY MIGHT INCREASE THE SSI ASSETS LIMIT TO $10,000.

it's a bipartisan bill too! and for anyone unaware, people on SSI (which is different from SSDI), can only have $2,000 in assets (unless they have an ABLE account, which comes with its own rules). this assets limit has been in place for FORTY YEARS and is a giant part of why being on SSI keeps people incredibly impoverished.

i've also heard they might remove the marriage penalty but i don't have the spoons to read or explain it so someone else please add on!

this is huge! please spread the word and do what you can to help ensure this happens!

a comic about fix-it fanfics

One thing that like. shakes me to the core if I think about the radiant emperor duology. is how Zhu wanted to help Ouyang despite the betrayal, in a way that was more than just a convergence of their fates.

Two things: since the first book, we know they're similar, connected, and that Zhu feels this connection wholly with a fascination that slowly becomes more complicated. She is more open to the connection that Ouyang, because she embraces wholly who she is, knowing her otherness in a complete way that for Ouyang was only pain and self-hatred. Second, Zhu is incredibly strong, mentally and emotionally, in separing herself from those who aren't in her tightest circle. Shelley wrote in two beautiful separate instances in hwdtw how when you witness someone in pain, if you don't hate that person you will be contaminated by that pain, and Zhu has for most of the series such unflinching emotional fortitude that while she observes and acknowledges and fights for other's pain, she doesn't feel it herself, not completely. Book one ends with her killing a kid because he is in her way, we can't forget it.

Ouyang's grief, so potent throughout the entire second book, is fully understood by Zhu only when she loses Xu Da. And Xu Da's death, united with the connection Zhu and Ouyang have nurtured in their fucked up way of theirs, is enough that when Ouyang's deep-rooted disgust and refusal of femininity breaks their alliance, it doesn't break their connection. Sure, Zhu feels true betrayal, and mours the possibility of a future that Ouyang sees only for a brief moment, for himself after the end of his revenge, made possible by Zhu. But Zhu, who is so ruthless she is similar to a person who is more violence than humanity, kind of... pushes the betrayal aside. She will help him anyway. They have the same goal. She keeps on including him in her dream of a future, even after he betrayed her.

When she learns of Ouyang's death, she tries to be happy he at least got what he wanted, completed his fate. She wants his desire for revenge to have mattered for herself, to quench the doubt if everything she's doing is worth the pain, and for Ouyang, sadness in her heart. But she already knows somethins is wrong in the air, in the room where the Great Khan's blood ran down the tiles, and that's what makes me insane. Their bond didn't break when Ouyang rejected their sameness and betrayed her. The bond deteriorates only when his sacrifice was for nothing. Zhu aches for Ouyang. She carries his ghost with her and at the last moment, Ouyang would be her final weapon. Except we've seen how Xu Da's death changed things. How grief, for Xu Da and Esen, shaped Zhu and Ouyang forever. So the fact that the last thing Zhu does before starting her reign is fixing the bond, restoring it to its original resonance, is what proves she was going to forgive him, in a way. She was going to give him a place in the new world.

The entire book is a sequence of tragedies, created by love expressed too late, too little, love that was not enough, yet was also the cause of every tragic end. So there's a little love also in Ouyang and Zhu's tragedy, where their sameness wasn't enough, and Ouyang is the last piece of the old world, made better by Zhu's will for a better future.

At times, Reading He Who Drowned the World felt like I was the one being flayed and steamed alive, being cut into a thousand little pieces by a knife. The mental and physical agony the characters go through is so painful it feels even excessive at times. But even when the most horrible things were happening and I was almost losing hope towards the end, I couldn’t even be mad because I could feel what the author was trying to tell me with all this pain and suffering, and I can buy that message 100 %.

Through these deeply painful scenes, the story shows how strict gender roles, toxic masculinity, misogyny and homophobia hurt and restrict us, and how lethal they can be.

Major spoilers after this

I was especially gutted by Ouyang’s death, but I feel like his storyline drove the themes of the story home in a very pronounced way. In the end, Ouyang was killed by the harmful ideas about masculinity and manhood that had been ingrained in him all his life.

His tragedy was never about having to avenge his family, but rather being so entrenched in the toxic culture of pride and revenge and masculinity that he would rather kill the one he loved and retain his ”honor” than put the idea of honor aside and love and be loved in return.

These toxic ideas are also the reason that stops him from forming real solidarity with Zhu. Even though they are both very similar, living as men while their bodies are not viewed as a man’s by the society, Ouyang cannot accept Zhu as an equal because he’s learned to project his self-hatred into hating everything even remotely feminine and female. It’s very upsetting to see how he loses his chance at healing and changing as a person by Zhu’s side, but I think that’s the whole point. This is a book series about broken people and how people who have been hurt sometimes only learn to hurt others, and how patriarchy and other harmful structures pit women, queer and trans ppl and basically anyone against each other. This theme is visible in almost all the pov characters of the story.

Madam Zhang is incapable of letting go of the ideas about what men and women can or cannot do, which leads to her not being able to accept Zhu as an ally and subsequently her own death.

Baoxiang has been equally hurt by narrow views of masculinity and manhood, and been scorned and rejected for his femininity all his life. His pain becomes so all-consuming that he is almost suffocated by his need to revenge the society that has wronged him. In the end, he is only able to survive because he can cast things like pride or shame aside in order to start anew.

In contrast, Zhu is able to not only survive but even thrive in some way bc she doesn’t really care about those roles. Even if she is not a woman, she never rejects or undervalues femininity and is able to use it to her own advantage when needed. She also knows that pride and honor cannot comfort you when you’re dead and she would rather live, and I think this extends to a more metaphoric level too. What’s the point of becoming ”successful” or hanging on to the idea of what a ”real man” should be like, if it only leads to you being dead inside?

Obviously, letting go of these harmful and hurtful ideas and structures can not be a individual effort, but something that needs to be addressed on a more systemic level. That’s why Zhu has to get on that throne herself in order to change the world. And it feels very meaningful that at the end, when she ascends on the throne, she’s wearing a maid’s skirts, owing her win to both the feminine and masculine sides of her.

For me, at least, the very final chapter of the book managed to justify all the awful things that happened. With mercy and grace, Zhu (and Ma!) demonstrate that to make it all worth the pain and suffering, you have to stop hurting and killing others and break free from that cycle of toxicity that their world has been built upon until now.

(Also as a disclaimer, I generally prefer to read about healing and letting go of pain and generally don’t think pain and suffering make things more deep or worthy… but I also think that this book managed to use these elements in a very meaningful way.)

Radiant Emperor Characters on the Barbie-Oppenheimer Scale

Zhu: Oppenheimer

Ma: Watched Oppenheimer with Zhu, then went to watch Barbie on her own

Xu Da: Barbie

Yuchun: Barbie

Ouyang: Oppenheimer

Esen: Oppenheimer. Brushed hands with Ouyang by accident in the darkened theatre. Thought nothing of it. Ouyang thought about it for the rest of the movie.

Baoxiang: Gathered his entire household for a public viewing of Barbie, watched Oppenheimer alone in private, then gathered everyone to watch Barbie again just to really drive the point home.

General Zhang: Watched Oppenheimer and then Barbie with Madame Zhang.

Madame Zhang: Watched Oppenheimer and Barbie with General Zhang. Then felt insecure and watched Oppenheimer again, alone.

Rice Bucket Zhang: Oppenheimer

Chen Youliang: Oppenheimer

Lady Ki: Barbie

Third Prince: Wanted to watch Barbie, but watched Oppenheimer with his friends instead.

Ouyang’s internal monologue for Zhu is “he’s disgusting. His worldview directly contradicts mine. He’s insane. I don’t get how he made it this far except I do, what the fuck did he just do. Jfc he’s ugly as sin.” While Zhu is like “he’s just like me for real. [he just skewered half a dozen people and is in constant sometimes self induced pain] Some people would say this is a bad thing, but I was never a good person. No one will get me like he does and no one will get him like I do. he’s certified insane.”

I love that Zhu is like, "Let's go! Let's do this!" about getting into the caves with an underwater entrance when she can't even swim, and Ouyang is over there like, "This dude's crazy."

this is perfect, exactly what i thought while reading tbh

what's interesting about wang baoxiang is that when it's his pov, you understand why he says all the things he says and it feels scathing and calculated, but when you hear it from ma's pov, it just sounds so defensive and vulnerable. like, here is a man who's bracing for hatred before you even look his way

FLAPPER FANNY SAYS, by American cartoonist, Ethel Hays (1892-1989).

I had very mixed feelings about the advent of pre-order rewards, because I felt like it was just another thing that authors have to do that takes away from actual writing time. But actually now I think all authors should make pre-order rewards that are smutty non-canonical fanfic of their own work thank you very much

what do you mean 244 and seongjoon spent one month together on the ship and seongjoon probably wore 244s clothes all the time and when they were on land they went on a date and seongjoon wanted to know 244 because when they first fought he noticed how theyre the same but he realized 244 is completely empty and he thought he is just a tool to 244 but then he got hurt and one of the crew said 244 was worried about him and must care about him which he never does which means he was hovering over knocked out seongjoon worried sick because he was injured and they had yet another fight and seongjoon was in jail all the time but he went out with the only clothes he had which were 244 and he just came crawling back on his knees for 244 asking to be taken back by him even though all the shit they went through and 244 gently asked him if hes okay with being together even though one of them will end up date and seongjoon STILL agreed to it and they were together for so long being partners and being comfortable around each but probably still just waiting for the moment they will fall apart bc they went into the relationship knowing theyre toxic for each other and then 244 filed a divorce and just sent a bunch of killers after him and sabotaged him but told him he'll wait for him for coffee and then hE DID JUST FOR SEONGJOON TO NEVER RETURN AND THEIR GAME WAS JUST OVER LIKE THAT ?!??!

barbie is not an "anti man" movie at all. it's so obvious to me that the kens were written like idiots not to call all men idiots (well... maybe a little) but instead to show how easy it is for someone to get taken advantage of. it's important to remember that while the barbies and kens are played by and written as adults, they function in the real world and overarching narrative as adolescents that don't know very much about the world.

reading ken as a young boy, he's initially nice to the girls around him (if insecure, lonely, and feeling pretty disrespected) but as soon as he steps into the real world, he sees all these men who feel very secure in their masculinity and self-assured, and he wants that for himself. he falls into the trap of the patriarchy much like a lot of young boys in real life fall into extremist right wing ideologies. but ken's insecurity never really goes away, it just gets covered with faux fur and headbands and country music. it's why he cries and admits to barbie that leading was hard. he never really wanted to hurt the barbies at all, he just wanted to feel confident and accepted by everyone, but especially barbie.

ken was never the problem by himself. he wasn't made into the world hating women. he was manipulated and turned into a misogynist by society.

right person wrong time

I graduated high school in 99.

There was a student at our school named Wayne.

Wayne was gay. It was obvious. He was unable to stay in the closet even if he wanted to. To make matters worse, he was also Black. From a bullying standpoint, that was not a great combo. Both Black and white students made fun of him relentlessly. He was ostracized from the only community that may have given him protection. Only us theater kids stuck up for him, but not to significant effect.

Wayne was bullied so much that at one point he finally snapped and attacked his bullies with a lunch tray. I was actually seated in perfect line of sight and just sat there chewing my soggy fries in stunned silence. It didn't even seem real as I was witnessing it. The image of him wailing on his main bully as the food on his tray flew off is permanently logged into my long term memory.

The bully he attacked had blood all over his face and went straight to the nurse. Other than superficial cuts, he was not injured.

Before the attack, Wayne went to teachers for help. He went to guidance counselors for help. He went to the principals for help.

He did all of the things you were supposed to do. No one helped him. They wagged a finger at the bullies and warned them to stop.

Wayne's lunch tray melee was the only thing that worked. His bullies stayed far away from him. But a week later Wayne was expelled and the bullies were given no punishment.

So... no.

No one in my school talked about being trans.

Because the only way to survive being openly queer was to bash people with a lunch tray.

Before Barbenheimer, there was “Apocalypse in Pink,” the August 1983 theme of fashion/culture magazine SPECTAGORIA. The issue’s controversial imagery of Barbie-esque models attempting to stay gorgeous and glamorous amidst nuclear annihilation sought to, in the words of editor/photographer Sera Clairmont, “revel in the morbid absurdity of the new American condition,” an “anxiety vibrating underneath all our plastic smiles.”

“It’s The Hot Pink Cold War,” Clairmont wrote in her introduction. “It’s ‘Material Girl’ on the radio and ‘WarGames’ at the drive-in. It’s ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ interrupted by the emergency broadcast signal. We’re told to look sexy, dress fashionable, make money, and spend money, but be sure we’re just the right amount of terrified about the bomb. Get that Malibu dream home, keep working on that perfect body, sip cocktails by the pool in your little pink bikini and watching the stocks go up — but STAY VIGILANT! and for God’s sake vote Republican, because that dream home could melt into a pink plastic inferno at any given moment. Just don’t stop smiling as the blast liquefies your skin into bubbling ooze like a Barbie doll in a microwave - it’s bad for the economy.”

---------

NOTE: This is a work of fiction created by me. This alternate reality horror story is part of my NightmAIres narrative art series (visit that link for a lot more). NightmAIres are windows into other worlds and interconnected alternate histories, conceived/written by me and visualized with synthography and Photoshop.

If you enjoy my work, consider supporting me on Patreon for frequent exclusive hi-res wallpaper packs, behind-the-scenes features, downloads, events, contests, and an awesome fan community. Direct fan support is what keeps me going as an independent creator, and it means the world to me.

‘it’s not one. there are two of them.’

strangers from hell, ep.10 || the hole by hye-young pyun

some of my favorite letterboxd reviews for strangers from hell

happy pride month!

jang bros caps + quotes

@hannigramislife called me out by name so here ya go. tonight we all suffer 🥰

cassano.

You know why I love Kwak Dongyeon so much? ‘Cause he just seems like a dude who wandered into acting and is vibing. Therefore he is my new actor husband

K-drama posters redesigned as movie posters.

(support my works x x ?)

Do y’all think siblings in medieval times would look at the little beasts in illuminated manuscripts and point at each other like ‘ha! ‘Tis thou!’

My random thoughts that i couldnt smoosh into its own post

This episode is a ten outta ten for me because, not only does it ooze the usual CS charm, it also has so much fun and emotion in it!!

Player shooting baskets in his room and Carmen kicking up her pants and picking the dollar out. i love it

Carmen bought a famous car from a movie, not only because she could, but because she knew Zack would be crazy for it. and when Player expressed interest in the stamp, she instantly wanted to drop over ten million dollars to get it for him. like...COME ON GIRL

The shopkeeper yelling "WE HAVE OTHERS, YOU KNOW!" PLEASE.

ZACK IS HAVING SO MUCH FUN WITH THE CAR. HES SO MUCH FUN I LOVE HIM Chase on the other hand is not. pathetic. love him too

Sheena had to climb up the bridge while Carmen just grappled up. Sheena L

CARMENS CONFRONTATION WITH HER PAST AT THE END. YESSSSSS SO GOOD

the cutest pair

BREAKING MY HIATUS JUST TO SHOVE THIS IN YOUR FACES like they're so cute I don't think you understand !!