This. All Of This. Exactly This.

This. All of this. Exactly this.

Being Asexual is something I have yet to fully come to terms with, and describing it is difficult.

I have the desire for a relationship. This is not fulled by sexual or romantic desire, but is instead fulled but the need to love someone to the fullest extent. I don’t need someone to love me but I need someone to love. I have so much to give, so much understanding, patience, and want to care for someone.

I would not mind a kiss or a romantic love and label. But those I talk to seem so different.

They have so much fueled desire and passion that later can become love. But I have so much love in my heart to give that if someone came along and understood me I would blossom with a blinding, warm passion. Not fire hot desire, nor sexy, but instead comfort and safety.

More Posts from Drunkbirdbug and Others

1 year ago

my masterlist

 My Masterlist

Disclaimer: This masterlist may contain works with adult contents that is not appropriate for those who are under the age of 18. Please proceed at your own risk. Thank you.

Taglist: I do not use taglist system for my work anymore. You may follow me and turn on the notification for new updates. Don't worry about spamming, my blog posts are only consist of fic updates and asks replies.

Navigation: For now I only write for Bucky Barnes and all of my works are complete unless stated otherwise. Each of the work under a specific universe are listed chronologically based on the story's timeline.

 My Masterlist

Genre tags:  🥀 - angst    ⛓ - smut    🐇 - fluff    🖤 - dark

 My Masterlist

FRIENDLY REMINDER

• I will block you if you...

MY WORK

Plot Twist Universe ft. beefy mafia!bucky

An arranged marriage with mafia!bucky.

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Plot Twist (🐇)(⛓) - Part I | Part II | Part III

♥︎ Around My Scars (🐇)(⛓) (🥀)

Behind The Facades Universe ft. avenger!bucky

An unrequited pining over a certain super soldier.

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Behind The Facades (🥀) - Part I | Part II | Part III

And You're Mine Universe ft. alpha!bucky

How grumpy chubby alpha!bucky finally found his omega.

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Must Be Fate (🐇)

♥︎ And You're Mine (🐇) (🥀)

Welcome Home... Soldat? Universe ft. winter soldier!bucky

That time when Bucky accidentally relapsed into the Winter Soldier.

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Welcome Home... Soldat? (🐇) (⛓) - Part I | Part II | Part III

♥︎ Welcome Home, Daddy (🖤) (🥀) (🐇)

Promise Me Universe ft. 40s!bucky / tfatws!bucky

When he was sent out for war, Bucky made a promise to his lover that might just last through several lifetimes.

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Promise Me (🥀) (🐇) - Part I | Part II | Part III

Thin Walls, Thin Lines Universe ft. fuckboy!bucky

What will happen if a fuckboy falls in love with a hopeless romantic?

 My Masterlist

♥︎ Thin Walls, Thin Lines (🥀)(🐇)(⛓) - Deleted Scene

Bucky Drabbles

♥︎ Until Then (🥀) (🐇) ft. 40s!bucky / avenger!bucky

A mission back in time brought Y/N to an unexpected encounter with the man she fell in love with. (Inspired by Timeless by Taylor Swift)

♥︎ I'm Not Like Her (🥀) (🐇) ft. avenger!bucky

Y/N had her heart broken when some agents made fun of how her body looks and Bucky came in clutch with the rescue.

♥︎ Never Lie To Me (⛓) ft. winter soldier!bucky

More drabbles coming soon...

In which Y/N's sinful thoughts towards the Asset is reciprocated. (Inspired by I Can See You by Taylor Swift )

♥︎ My Person (🐇)(⛓) ft. tfatws!bucky

In which Sam's question forces Bucky to reveal his true feelings to his so called "friend", Y/N.

MY RECOMMENDATIONS

Support other writers here: #fic rec

All my recommendations are consist of Sebastian Stan's characters.

 My Masterlist
1 year ago

All I want is a giant orc girlfriend who lets me play with her hair.

Is that really too much to ask for


Tags
1 year ago

Really want to break the composure of a prim and proper vampire lord by sucking him off. Quiet gasps and subdued noises rising to moans. Back arching. Hips gracefully but desperately undulating. Head tossing back. Long hair splayed out on his pretty silk sheets. Shivering. Whimpering. Tears in those ancient, red eyes as they meet mine.

1 year ago

The arguments happening in the notes made me laugh a stupid amount. A customer then joined me in my joy after asking what made me laugh so much. I love it when people get mad about stupid things.

drunkbirdbug - Tf if I know
1 year ago

Magical Jaskier Fic Recs:

a smile made for war by andrewminyards

You are destruction, Jaskier’s mentor tells him. Death and destruction thrum in Jaskier’s core of chaos, his magic bringing nothing but annihilation, and Jaskier hates it.

But music is not destruction. Music is creation, and it sings in Jaskier’s veins. There is nothing quite like the rush of joy and energy whenever music flows through him, and he forgets about the destruction that his chaos is capable of as music fills his soul.

After decades of being a sorcerer, Jaskier finds himself in music, and for the first time, his magic brings life.

we dance around a ring and suppose by bilboakenshield27

“He twirled between tables, voice rising and falling, glancing surreptitiously around for an escape route. There was a small door behind the dais and the main entrance through which the queen had entered—both manned by four guards. Jaskier mentally calculated the blows to his dignity if he just booked it through the main door mid-song."

-or-

Jaskier is an empath.

Lightning in a Bottle by stars_and_selkies

Jaskier has made plenty of mistakes in his long life. Most of which include sleeping with married women, admittedly, but one of the worst mistakes he has ever made was following Geralt of Rivia like a lost puppy. The worst mistake he's ever made in over 80 years of living... and the best.

Flowers Can’t Grow on Stone Floors by a_static_world

Julian Alfred Pankratz was born a happy, healthy baby, one misty November morning in the small duchy of Lettenhove. Strangely, the boy hadn’t cried once; he’d seemingly been born content, blinking blearily at the outside world like an old man who’d lost his spectacles and wasn’t quite sure whether he'd seen his grandchildren or an oddly-shaped boulder. By the time Julian turned two, his earlier silence had been all but forgotten.

Destiny Denied by hyrulehearts1123, sageclover61

Stregobor created Witchers to be the perfect monster hunters, but they rose up against their creators and were not loyal to them. And so in revenge, Stregobor kidnapped one Witcher’s child of surprise, a young Julian Alfred Pankretz de Lettenhove. And yet, because of one small medallion that spoke to him, Jaskier’s loyalties were not to Stregobor, but to the Witchers who tried to raise him despite the distance.

You’re Everything (I Just Didn’t Know) by ScentedBooks

Jaskier gets gravely injured and his magic isn't helping, Geralt refuses to let him die.

1 year ago

I’ll try anything at this point

This Is The Money Pentacle. Reblog And Unexpected Money Will Come To You!

This is the money pentacle. Reblog and unexpected money will come to you!

1 year ago

Geralt and Jaskier spending an evening alone drinking together; Jaskier's gossiping, telling stories, and philosophizing.

Geralt's mostly content to listen but as he gets into his cups, he becomes more willing to chat so he tells Jaskier some of his own stories and philosophies.

Jaskier ends up asking Geralt about retiring from from being a witcher; if he no longer fought monsters, then what would he do?

Geralt finds the question irrelevant since witchers don't retire and he certainly can't due to his looks, pale with white hair and golden cat eyes don't do much to disguise him afterall.

Jaskier's persistent though, drunk and curious, he badgered his friend for his thoughts.

Geralt finally just tells the bard he'd go off to Toussaint, hoping the answer is enough to satisfy the drunk bard, but Jaskier keeps pushing for any details.

Geralt and Jaskier talk of a ranch off away from towns and cites. A little cabin with a garden full of herbs, apple trees to treat Roach, and all the best books Geralt needs to read.

They never bring it up again, a drunken conversation one night that was forgotten as all the others were.

But it wasn't forgotten.

Jaskier didn't forget.

He never told Geralt, it was to be a surprise, a gift for all the money and fame Jaskier earned from his songs about the Witcher.

He had started saving money. Just putting aside extra earnings from courts and work from the winter months in Oxenfurg. It would take time, but he had plenty and so did Geralt.

Maybe Geralt won't retire, but maybe he'll take a vacation. A long rest for a few years in a warm little house away from the dangers of a witcher.

But Geralt left.

And Jaskier wasn't sure what to do.

He didn't know if Geralt would ever come back, or if they would even meet again. He didn't feel like spending the money on himself, it still felt owed to Geralt.

So he bought a few acres in the countryside, commisioned a cabin, and furnished it.

Maybe if he ran into Geralt one day, he'd be able to at least give him it. A thank you for everything Geralt did for him; even if the witcher didn't care for the bard, he still kept him alive and full of inspiration.

1 year ago

[lion rakshasa] Dain

lion rakshasa!Dain x human!Reader Good to know: smut

Summary: Dain needs a massage.

[lion Rakshasa] Dain

With a sigh, you open the door to let the warm breeze run through the small cabin. The scent of oils, candles, and cleaning supplies mix with the dry smell of the night. The rush of air caresses your cheeks and plays with your hair as you lean against the door jamb. You cross your arms in front of your chest. Your gaze wanders over the view of the resort.

The other cabins around you are closed. Their windows are dark. You are not surprised, though. It's already late, and you feel the tiredness in your bones and the soreness in your muscles. You almost laugh. You could kill for a massage. Rolling your shoulders, you straighten your posture. The familiar throbbing between your legs is almost painful, and you wish for nothing more but a warm bath and your comfortable bed.

Lush greens and colorful flowers bloom on the side of the road, leading to the pools on your left side. There is a small waterfall that falls from one to the other. The sound is relaxing and seems loud in the silence. The crystal-clear water sparkles under the silvery glow of the moon. Your gaze moves up to the sky, pausing on the glinting stars before dropping on the hotel nearby. Light filters through a few windows. One side of the building is covered with greenery. You can barely see the sand-colored wall underneath the leaves, waving in the rhythm of the wind.

And behind everything, there is the desert with its ever-changing form. Under the cover of the night sky and the stars' gentle glow, the endless sea of sand spreads out as far as the eyes can see. It looks like it melts into the darkness at the horizon. In the distance, grand dunes emerge from the ground with elegant edges and slopes.

"Hey!" A deep voice breaks the silence, and you almost jump from the surprise. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to frighten you. You are the masseur, right?" You smile and shake your head. "It's fine," you tell him. "You are Dain, I hope?" He nods, and you step away from the door to let him in.

The male is burly, even for a lion rakshasa. His mane is a few shades darker than the fur covering his body. He is a mix of muscles and fat. His shoulders are broad, but a slight belly is bulging under the white towel around his waist. The fabric stretches around his trunk-like thighs.

He looks good. He definitely looks good.

You close the door behind you with a soft click.

"You can take off the towel if you want to," you tell him. "And lay down on the table." The male grunts, and with a quick tug, he takes off the towel and puts it on a chair nearby. You can see the muscles of his thighs working as he moves. His tail sways to the side in a gentle rhythm. Your eyes are glued to the hard flesh of his bottom as he lies on his stomach on the massage table. "It won't break under me, right?" He asks. His voice is muffled. "No," you assure him. "You will be fine, I promise."

As you start to work, the soothing scent of the oils you use fills your nostrils. The inside of the massage cabin is covered in an orange hue from the candles. Small flames dance on top of them. The dim light makes the color of his fur darker. They are soft under your hands. His tail still sways left and right, and from time to time, you can hear a deep purr rumbling out of his chest. You can feel it in your core.

Using your body weight, with the heel of your hands, you stroke down the line of his spine until you reach his tail. You knead the hard muscles of his back, changing the motion of your hands every now and again as you watch his reactions. Dain's breathing is calm and even, and slowly but surely, you can feel him relax under you. You circle your thumbs on his shoulder blades, going up to his shoulders. Your fingers dig into him, finding every nerve and knot on your way. When you are done with his upper body, you move to his legs, using your thumb to massage and rub his muscles. "I'm sorry," he grunts when his tail curls around your arm for the second time. You let yourself laugh a little. "It's fine." Your finger slides over his tail, reaching the base. You are careful and gentle as you stroke it. He jumps at the sudden contact but doesn't move to get away. Another rumble breaks through his chest. "Is it good?" You ask him. "Yeah," he grunts. "But it starts to hurt." For a second, you panic, letting go of his tail immediately. "I'm sorry," you gasp. Dain shakes his head. "Not that," he replies, turning to the side, then onto his back. "That." "Oh."

Oh.

A lazy smirk pulls on your lips at the sight. Dain's hard cock bobs as he moves. He is thick and wet from the pre-cum that slips down his shaft. A drop follows the line of a vein on the side of his cock. His balls are heavy between his legs.

You continue your session. Moving from Dain's legs to his upper body, you work on his muscles, letting him relax and enjoy the silence. Your gaze lands on his erection every now and again, but you don't make a move yet. You tease him and massage him all over.

His eyes are closed. An amused smile plays on his lips. "You are the devil." His voice is hoarse. "Am I?" You grin, smoothing your palms down his chest. His fur shines under the dim lights with the lotion you used on him. His cock jerks when your fingers brush the base. Another drop of pre-cum drops down his shaft. "Gods, woman!" Dain groans. You laugh but decide to have mercy on him. He was still more patient than most of your guests.

Your fingers curl around the base of his shaft, squeezing the flesh softly. A low groan echoes off the walls, and you can feel him twitching under your hold. Dain is warm and soft under your palm. The lotion and his pre-cum mix as you move up. Your other hand rests on his thigh. His muscles are tense with anticipation. You feel it too. Need burns your insides as you pump his shaft lazily. You use your thumb to smear his juices even more on his cock, following the thick vein on the side up to the head. Your nail grazes the sensitive skin. The rakshasa shudders under you. His breathing is labored. "Are you sure you are not a cat?" He asks with humor in his voice. "You play with my cock like a new toy." You grin, leaning closer. The air escaping your lips is warm on Dain's erection. "But it is my new toy." His deep laugh ends in a snarl when you lick up on his length from the bottom to the top. You flick the soft skin under the head. His taste is strong on the tip of your tongue. It's salty and makes you want more. You lap up on him again, once, twice, three times. "Fuck!" He growls. The sound vibrates through the air, going straight between your legs. Glancing at him from the corner of your eyes, you force a smug grin down and take his cock into your mouth. You go inch by inch, letting your lips stretch around him. Keeping your hand on the base, pumping him slowly, you lick and suck on his crown, pressing your tongue into the tip. You can feel him snapping any second, but you are not done yet. You squeeze him, making him snarl again before his breath is taken away as you slide him down deeper into your throat. You hum around his length, letting the vibration of your throat rush up his spine. "Fuckfuckfuck!" Spurts of pre-cum fill your mouth, dripping down on his cock and balls. His hips push up against you, wanting to fuck your mouth. You hum again in agreement, hollowing your cheeks some more. Tears burn your eyes as he starts to move up and down. He thrusts into your mouth hurriedly, chasing his pleasure in your warm, wet mouth. Your tongue is flat against the underside of his cock. "You born for this," he growls. "A warm mouth for all the monsters who come here." You are slick between your legs. Your pussy throbs with desire even though you are already sore because of your previous guests. "You feel so good around my cock! Fuck!" Your free hand from his thigh slips to his balls. They are heavy in your palm as you start to play with them. His cock twitches in your mouth more often than a few seconds ago. "I'm going to cum," he warns, still pushing his hips. Your jaw and throat ache. You let him use you to reach his high. Your hand on his cock jerks him faster, and you bob your head against his thrusts. You want him to lose his mind when he comes into your mouth. The cabin is filled with his groans and moans.

"Fuck!"

He floods your mouth, and you gulp down everything he has to give you. The work of your throat squeezes his cock even more, pushing him harder and harder into his orgasm.

The male needs long minutes to come back to his senses. "Will you be there tomorrow?" He asks, still panting. His voice is hoarse, and his cock lays soft on his thick thigh.

You really want to know how it feels inside you.

"I will write you up."

1 year ago

Astarion Fanfiction Master List

We Shall Meet Again

If you date a vampire, mortality is the issue worth to discuss

Things We Deserve

Astarion still doesn't believe he is worthy of love. A lot of angst and fluff.

The Scorching Sun

With the tadpole gone, Astarion is left alone with pain and fear. A desperate attempt to redeem the ending scene.

The Skin I Hate

Astarion wakes up from yet another nightmare but this one brings even more disgusting memories that he is used to.

If I Had a Voice, I Would Scream

The Cloak of Dragomir is finally found, and Astarion can walk in the sunlight. But magic comes with a terrible price.

The Marks on Our Skin

The bite mark is the only place on Astarion's body Tav doesn't touch. Until now.

How Dare you?!

Astarion has only two desires. Become mortal again and be with Tav. But you can't have both

Fear

Tav is experiencing a panic attack.

Over the Seas

So, Astarion is mortal and Tav is alive. What next?

Snowstorm

As you stay together in a small inn, you accidently trigger Astarion.

Fever

During your post-game adventures, you get sick and Astarion takes care of you.

Pointy Ears

Astarion has very sensitive ears, you've never touched them. Until today.

Tainted

Astarion believes he's been healed - but yet another unpleasant interaction and the darkness is back.

Winter Solstice

Astarion and Tav spend Winter Solstice in the northern town of Firesheer, and the subject of marriage comes up.

Murderous Tendencies

Yet another nightmare with terrible consequences.

The Sea of Moving Ice

Astarion returns too early with a confession.

Doubts

Astarion thinks you are going to leave him for someone better and accuses you of infidelity.

--

Astarion x Tyrael the Barbarian (OC Tav)

The Rogue and The Barbarian

Six months after the game, Astarions asks Tyrael why she's stayed with him.

Heartbeat

Astarion is anxious about Tyrael's pregnancy.

Alethaine, Astarion's Dhampir Daughter

Little Bundle of Darkness

Astarion becomes a father.

Beloved Monsters

Domestic fluff.

--

My works on AO3

Headcanons are here

I will write

smut, fluff, angst, hurt/comfort, sensitive trigger warning topics (SA, suicide, self-harm, traumas etc, but I will adress them as a serious issue, not a kink), established relationships, pregnancy, dadstarion, female or gn Tav/reader

I won't write

Ascended Astarion, BDSM, AU, other companions (maybe later), mindflayers --

Tag list

@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @astarion-beloved @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati

Text me if you want to be added into the Tag List

1 year ago
People Really Get On This App And Fight Me Because I Don't Stand For This. Humanity Is Lost.

People really get on this app and fight me because I don't stand for this. Humanity is lost.

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drunkbirdbug - Tf if I know
Tf if I know

| bored | I have nothing else to put here | all I want in life is good angst | 18+ | she/they | lesbian |

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