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Latest Posts by kelvari - Page 3
Teen Dad Marvel
There’s some very big leaps and logic the JL has decided at Marvel is a teen dad. Billy doesn’t even know how it happened. Let’s take a look at some pass incidents that have made them think this.
To start us off, the very first incident of this occurred when Batman, Superman, and Marvel were debating how old a kid should be before they become a sidekick.
Marvel: “I wasn’t even 12 when Junior came along.”
Supes: “I’m sorry, not even 12?”
Marvel: “Nope. And then it was about… two years or so later that he got his powers and we went on the fight crime together.
To Billy, that meant that he met Freddy when he was around eight and the other boy was nine. It when Billy was nine himself that he got his powers and then a year later, Freddy gained his.
To Superman and Batman, that sounded like somehow, in some way, Marvel had a kid at a max of 12 years old. It also sounds like that two-year-old got powers before it could probably even walk.
Batman and Supes: *sharing looks*
Supes: “I… I’m sorry?”
Marvel: “For what?”
Batman and Supes: *share another look*
Batman: “Nothing, Captain. We just hadn’t expected that you’d gone through something like that.”
Marvel: “Something like what?”
They didn’t answer Billy’s question because they assumed he was playing dumb.
The second incident that convinced the JL, or just Batman and Superman, of this, happened when both Marvel and Junior were at the Watchtower. It seemed like that day was a bad day for Junior’s leg, so Marvel offered to massage it. That how they ended up in the rec room watching Cartoon Network a little too intently as Marvel absentmindedly, massaged the leg draped across his lap.
Marvel and Junior: *watching Gumball or something and sipping juice boxes*
Junior: “How do you do that so well?”
Marvel: “Freddy, I’ve been doing this since I was like nine, obviously I’m gonna do it well.”
Junior: “Yeah, but how did you learn?”
Marvel: “You know that kooky doctor on 48th Street?”
Junior: “The one that’s not evil and turned like half his patients blue?”
Marvel: “Yeah, him, so on one of your really bad days, I got really desperate and really wanted to find a way to make it less bad. So I went to him and he gave me a masseuse book for a penny.”
Junior: “Oh… Cool. Do you still have that book?”
Marvel: “Yeah? It’s probably somewhere at the Rock.”
Supes; *listening from around a corner, clenching his heart because he finds them wholesome*
And it really was from Clark’s point of view. See, most of the JL assumed that Junior was born with a bad leg. After all, he’s supposed to be a demigod, isn’t he? He’s pretty much indestructible so they didn’t think he’d gotten that injury from someone or something. In Clark’s mind, he’s imagining a nine-year-old, itty-bitty Marvel with a baby Freddy massaging Freddy’s little baby leg because he was crying.
Also, Junior’s real name is Freddy? Also, Marvel was NINE when he had him??? Wait, but then how old is Marvel now? Also how old is Junior??
Supes never got an answer to these questions because he was too chicken to bring up the topic.
The third incident came from Mary and Marvel who were also at the Watchtower when this happened. The two were baking cookies together, one of the usual father-daughter activities the JL have seen them do. Specifically, they were making dark chocolate bat-shaped cookies for Batman, on the request of Robin. When Bruce found out about this, he went to go tell them to stop because he really didn’t need the cookies even if they were absolutely delicious.
That’s how he overheard their conversation.
Mary: “Do you remember mom?”
Marvel: “Uh…” *thinking* “Nope, I got nothing.”
Mary: “How?”
Marvel: “Because the last time I saw them, I was eight years old, Mary? You were too.” *whisking something in a bowl*
Bruce took that as Marvel leaving home, at a concerningly young age, for whatever reason and eventually taking Mary to see her grandparents when she was around the age he left. Either that, or he left, and took her back to visit her grandparents when she was two-years-old.
Mary: “Yeah, but I had amnesia. What’s your excuse?”
Marvel: “I was eight?” *hands her the whisk so she can lick it*
It was this incident, and the two others that shaped this idea of teen dad Marvel. Thus, using the combined brain cells of both Batman and Superman, the two came to a conclusion: for some reason, Marvel left home, during the time he left he somehow got someone pregnant and that resulted in Mary and Junior.
Either that, or he just found them on the side of the road, though, the first theory is more believable. The only problem being their ages.
If only they could find their mother… maybe she’d be willing to spill.
jason comes back to gotham as red hood and the batfam have no idea who he is or that he has anything to do with the league of assasins until during a wayne gala theres a hostage situation and before bruce or anyone can figure out a way to go suit up a crime lord appears and saves everybody only to have a publically friendly catch up session with.... damian wayne.
damian covers to the press afterwards that its because of red hoods 'i dont hurt kids' rule and that he'd met the guy a few times in crime alley before he was dumped on bruce's doorstep. gotham's citizens are slightly concerned but honestly? the scary stabby child that's been glaring at them from the corners of parties since he got here with absolutely no backstory or history in gotham turning out to have a past with crime alleys most infamous protector/crime boss? it's a little comforting.
it's less comforting to the bats.
damian, getting out the car after the gala: I don't know what hood was thinking, making me his public ally. he's lucky the simpletons of this city bought that, don't you agree father?
damian: *turns to see the rest of the family staring at him with hard eyes*
damian:
damian: ...what did i do?
everybody's less than pleased that damian withheld the info that red hood is trained and from the LOA, but damian simply maintains that they never asked. when further questioned about why his relationship with hood was so familial and about what his identity is... they get
damian: hood was perhaps my favourite tutor back home, the only one i didn't kill. he taught me many things, from how to poison somebody to famous quotes and sayings from classic literature.
bruce: what. is. his. name.
damian: you know what one of those sayings was? 'snitches get stitches'
dick: *slams his face into the wall*
tim: well you did want him to be more childlike.
they eventually have to move past it because damian won't budge, unfortunately jason is finding this whole scenario fucking hysterical because holy shit he'd thought about coming back and pissing off his family through their secret personas but he hadn't even considered the beauty of coming back and pissing them off through their public personas.
and from then on the entire batfamily has to deal with pretending to be nervous or wary every time the red hood comes and crashes their very real wayne public events. it's fucking incredible. jason can't believe that he was gonna try and beat the shit out of tim to freak out bruce when all he had to do was grab a glass of champagne, walk up to the dude, and ask politely how stocks at WE are doing. 'brucie wayne' has no fucking clue what to do, and jason just poured the champagne against his helmet and let it all fall to the ground and everybody's too scared to say anything.
nobody else bats an eye when red hood becomes an occasional presence at these fancy events, apart from the people who know for a fact they could be on his shitlist. mostly because this is gotham, but also because they know he's a crime lord so like... riches and business running wise he kinda fits the bill for these things anyway? and if the stoic kid of brucie wayne eases up around him then the whole 'i dont hurt kids' thing must ring true so it's not like he'll cause too much trouble. also the guards are too scared to tell him he's not allowed in, so there's that.
the bats hate everything about this. they don't even know what red hoods game is, they have no idea why they're being tortured and they're getting paranoid about it. damian's absolutely no help because he's just happy to 1. get to see his brother on a regular basis again, and 2. get to see his brother find a less self-destructive outlet for the pit rage he's watched jason struggle with for years.
it's also just really fun to watch tim accidentally fall asleep against a wall mid-gala, wake up to red hood's helmet 2 inches from his face, and then almost break his own hand trying to punch it because he forgot that he wasn't in-mask and had to hold back last second.
dick is mostly just indignant because every time red hood shows up and hangs around near damian, damian immediately becomes a picture perfect public persona, interacting with the elites of gotham with the same expertise of tim or bruce. he's so mad that a crime lord can wrangle HIS little brother in public but he can't, that he completely disregards the whole crime lord thing and starts bugging red hood both in and out of mask about how to be a better older brother to damian. at one point he corners red hood on a rooftop mid patrol.
nightwing: ok, seriously, when I asked damian not to be rude to the new investors he told a woman her coat looked like it would hold up in a fight against two-face, but when YOU ask he becomes a model citizen, what is UP with that?
red hood, being an asshole: *gasp* y-you're.... YOU'RE RICHARD GRAYSON?
nightwing:
nightwing: ....oh my god you didn't know?
red hood: no i fucking knew you're just an idiot. and damian listens to me because I'm the only tutor he could never kill and he knows i'll beat his ass with my magic swords.
nightwing:
red hood: and also im the only one at the league who played Just Dance with him so i get special privileges, like telling him what to do.
dick asks damian to play Just Dance with him that night and damian just looks at him all forlorn, like 'it wouldn't be the same without the exhilarating thrill of knowing if anybody catches us hood will be stabbed and thrown in the lazarus pit again as punishment for corrupting me... it was really an unfair punishment considering he replaced grandfather's bed with a plastic pool covered by a sheet once, and the only punishment he got for that was being banned from the family dinners for two weeks'
dick stares at him. damian just adds 'he used to sit outside the window like a dog. watching and occasionally yelling about the injustice. mother gave him a plate of roast potatoes through the window once. grandfather disapproved.'
nobody knows quite what to do about red hood becoming a gotham elite, but they are becoming more concerned about damian's family's dynamic every goddamn day.
*kicks down door* Have I ever mentioned that my gremlin brain came up with an explanation for why the characters treat Lucis like a continent when the map is so weird and so oddly small in proportions, even when taking into account the (large) part of it we can’t go?
Because gremlin brain did that.
Admittedly partly inspired by a throwaway line in the fic Nocturne but like-
War of the Astrals.
Big deal.
Bahamut alone made a HUGE rift in the continent that stretches for miles and is probably like- roughly grand canyon sized.
So here we have the god of fire, and the god of the SEA among others, all duking it out prior to Bahamut carving his rift and “killing” Ifrit and like-
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A VOLCANO ERUPTS. I mean the big ones. The Krakatoas and Santorini’s of the world.
STUFF SINKS.
Sure it’s just an island in RL but when you have EMBODIMENTS OF THOSE FORCES OF NATURE all trying to kill each other then STUFF WILL REALLY SINK.
So gremlin brain was like: what if the reason the map is weird is because it IS really that small. What if Lucis is roughly the size of a really large RL ISLAND while Niflheim/Tenebrae’s continent is MAYBE Australia sized at absolute most and the reason nobody bats an eye is because the rest of the continents SUNK WHEN SOLHEIM FELL. Leviathan threw hands so hard with Ifrit while Titan was busy stopping a meteor or something that a huge swathe of land just- sunk. Straight up. Galahd probably used to be a freaking mountain range before the oceans rose up so high they almost drowned and Ramuh had to stop spamming lightning long enough to hastily save what would later become the islands (and oh look a reason for the Galahdians to revere Ramuh as their patron astral, he saved them from the wrath of the burning sea).
So the survivors of solheim, when they were picking up the pieces, would have known that a ton of land was lost, but its still all the land they have left, so they keep calling it the “continent” and then over time people just forget that continent used to mean anything larger than what they currently have, and that’s why the characters are like “it’s a whole world out there” and we the players are like “why map so small?????”
It would also explain why Ravatogh takes up such a large chunk of the map? Like- volcanos can be Tol, so the ocean didn’t manage to swallow it up.
Am I making any sense? It made sense in my head.
Honestly this has probably already occurred to a lot of people in this fandom but it finally occurred to me like- a month ago and I finally got around to sharing so there.
May the 4th Be With You!!!
2022 edition✨
~~
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DP x DC prompt where Bruce and Tim go to investigate Amity Park, with Jason in tow, all suited up. They’ve heard a strange claim about “ghosts” there, and trying to research the town revealed a concerning government presence and tampered records.
The moment they enter the town, the ectoplasm in the air starts rapidly filtering out the corrupted ectoplasm in Jason’s system and strengthening his underdeveloped core (kinda like To Join the Whispers). Jason doesn’t tell Bruce or Tim at first since he’s kind of freaking out about how the Pit is responding to the town. Then Jason’s arm goes through a table and they don’t really have any idea what is happening and are now all freaking out about it. Danny sees this happen and immediately recognizes the same sudden, uncontrollable power displays he had after the Accident.
Danny is extremely torn because he wants to help (a new halfa?? or something close enough??? and he’s a vigilante???? hell yeah), but he’s also Terrified of Batman going anywhere near his fucking house. So he introduces himself as Phantom and tries his best to steer them away from FentonWorks while also trying to help talk Red Hood through everything and dump a lot of ghost facts on them. Going to see Frostbite is extremely tempting, but Danny’s pretty sure he can handle this. Pretty sure. (He does Not want Batman near the portal, since it means being in his gd house, and he doubts he can get Red Hood there without Batman following.)
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TRICK OR TREAT!!! Studio Ghibli? Or atla? I've never been able to participate in your prompt fills, hopefully this gets in on time!! Love your writing, love you!
Sophie is a talented witch, so she doesn’t have to do more than glance at Howl before she sighs. “That poor boy is missing his heart.”
“Like you’re one to talk,” her fire demon grumbles beside her, “You gave me your youth to save me. Which was very stupid, by the way.”
“So you’ve said,” she says, amused. “Many times.”
She scowls and shrugs, saying, “Maybe we should stick our nose in. Maybe we can help each other, figure out a way to break the other’s curse.”
“And if not, at least your get to talk to another fallen star for a while?” Sophie asks, and before her demon can respond, she barrels forward, “Yes, fine, I suppose we don’t have anything better to do.”
I feel like Jason and Damian would play DnD together and it started at their time in the League. I believe with my whole soul that Jason is just a big nerd, so I think it'd be cute if he showed Damian how to play DnD so he could use his imagination by playing a "childish game" (Damian's words).
When Damian joins the family, they think that he's sneaking out because he doesn't feel comfortable in their home yet, but really he's just meeting up with Red Hood every Thursday to continue their campaign.
Now, nobody knows of their weekly hang outs, even after Jason reconnects with the family. Not even Tim, who is also a huge nerd and has been begging Dick to play DnD with him for years and being constantly be turned down.
Eventually, Jason and Damian are setting up their game and Tim walks in on them.
Tim:
Jason: "It's not what it looks like?"
Tim: *Takes a deep breath* "Are.. are you playing DnD?"
Jason:
Damian: "It's a perfectly acceptable thing to-"
Tim: "YOU'VE BEEN PLAYING DND THIS WHOLE TIME AND YOU NEVER THOUGHT TO INVITE ME??"
Jason: "Uh-"
Tim: "I've been begging- ABSOLUTELY BEGGING Dick to do a campaign with me. I've been rejected too many times to count-"
So now, every Thursday, Jason, Damian, and Tim gather round to play DnD.
TRICK OR TREAT!!! Studio Ghibli? Or atla? I've never been able to participate in your prompt fills, hopefully this gets in on time!! Love your writing, love you!
Sophie is a talented witch, so she doesn’t have to do more than glance at Howl before she sighs. “That poor boy is missing his heart.”
“Like you’re one to talk,” her fire demon grumbles beside her, “You gave me your youth to save me. Which was very stupid, by the way.”
“So you’ve said,” she says, amused. “Many times.”
She scowls and shrugs, saying, “Maybe we should stick our nose in. Maybe we can help each other, figure out a way to break the other’s curse.”
“And if not, at least your get to talk to another fallen star for a while?” Sophie asks, and before her demon can respond, she barrels forward, “Yes, fine, I suppose we don’t have anything better to do.”
he’s the beauty; she’s the beast
so i’m sure the remake of a timeless classic that disney is about to roll out is going to be great and all
but here’s another way we could do things:
he’s the beauty
she’s the beast
for a movie who’s central theme is inner beauty, it doesn’t really do anything to support that, you know? so how about this: adam, our prince turned beast, isn’t an inhospitable monster. because this back story doesn’t make any sense – why is the young prince of this land alone, in a castle, only to be caught unaware by a witch?
so how about this – this is pseudo france, right, so these royals do what their real life counterparts did. they flee. the cruel, greedy king and queen flee and leave their young son behind with their staff. their son who is kind and soft hearted and totally unfit to rule any kingdom (never mind that they’re literally running away from their own people). not only that – they trade their son for their freedom, trade their kingdom for their freedom. to the witch.
so the witch comes, and she doesn’t disguise herself as a crone, goes to him looking as lovely and young as her magic keeps her. but our prince adam has a talent, one many cast-aside, neglected children have developed – the ability to see people for who they really are, and he knows this is no kind young woman in need of his help. he refuses to let her in – and there’s this little twist to the magic, that she can only enter the palace grounds and claim her prize if she’s welcomed in a as a guest, and he, the young master of this castle, won’t let her in.
Keep reading
the campaign i was playing my archfey warlock, Kairos, ended this past sunday so i decided to draw her post-game after her twins were born.
the imagined context for this drawing is that Kairos was returning home from a guild party and in her not so sober state, tackled her husband the moment she saw him. the twins decided it was fun and joined in
lil notes for any curious:
her husband's name is Gul'iard Wynfina, kids are unnamed however
Kairos was born human and named Helena Rivers, got isekai'ed (with her phone) into a half drow woman by her patron and took on the name Kairos Clerosis, wound up as Kairos Otsut after kinda becoming a demon and only got the name Kairos Wynfina post-game
Gul'iard was actually the first enemy the party really fought and killed together ( don't worry, he got better!)
the twin in the sprigatito pjs is male, the one with the cape is female
during the game, thanks to magic bean shenanigans, Kairos actually had a sprigatito hence the pjs; Gul'iard had a little hamster/gopher familiar that was dressed as a lil knight
if she looks familiar that's because the art i used for Kairos' token post becoming a demon was Ines from Arknights
okay contrary to a previous post i made: what if jason wrote fanfiction but it became a MC Daredevil situation where literally everyone knew his identity but he just waves them off
Jason: *writing A/N* here you go guys, sorry, something came up with my job comments: we all know it was the warehouse penguin blew up. its all over the news jason: *responding* idk what you're even talking about dude, i don't own a tv. how could a flightless avian blow up a warehouse
jason: this chapter's gonna be a little dark cuz that's my mood this week comments: is it because they took you off the earth's greatest threats list? jason: they wh---no of course not
jason: *posts* comments: we missed you red hood! jason: idk who that guy is but he sounds cool
jason: ugh, have you guys seen the new episode? shit's horrible. here's a fix-it. comments: do you . . . perhaps . . . think its horrible because they misused the gun props . . . jason: no i was talking about x character dying but YES OH MY GOD THAT PART HURT ME TO WATCH comments: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
comments: so when r u going to change your ao3 name to redhood? jason: i fucking swear if one more of you moterfuckers insinuates that i am the gotham vigilante known as the red hood i will withhold five of my most recently written chapters from the entire fucking lot of you comments: . . . you'd never jason: fuck
comments: you have an interestinly in-depth and expanisve kowledge of firearms jason: well, we all have hobbies jason: mine was born out of fear of the ao3 author curse. ima fuckin shoot the thing the moment i see it comin comments:
