Nahbruhroad

I’m really sad

Swimming actually has unlocked something in mr especially with the mind body soul connection. When I kept mentioning swimming lessons to people, they all kept asking me. How are you feeling? Like how what do you think your end goal is gonna be like? How are you feeling going into it and I wasn’t too sure how to answer it because I wasn’t really looking at it as if it was like an achievement or something (very much is an achievement) but I was just literally just gonna go straight into it like just trusting instructors and following instructions and getting it just because I can and when I went to the swimming lessons instructor said something to me about how humans are meant to be flow in like everyone can vote because we’re meant to be floating, like we’re meant to flow in water and it literally I can literally feel my body being welcome to by water as like a sense of belonging and you know like the way that I grew up it wasn’t really like that water very much my enemy nature nature is calling was very much my enemy 

I see colours that aren’t even there

I hate colonialism and how prominent it is in my life

Can everyone fuck off im about to fail my degree

after the big clean

Having to accept that the only way to be happy and properly claim my freedom is to be estranged from my family and maintain a long distance relationship at most. Especially if I want to live for myself and claim my individuality without a say from these people, is to let go and be free. Communicating the abuse and selfishness from them is so pointless when their ego is too fucking big. I’m just so glad for God blessing me with tosin and changing our relationship for the better and overcoming the war our parents tried to enforce on us. She’s actually my twin and we love each other. Now I just need to find a way to subtly come out as gay with her still loving me idk if I even care about that tbh.

No love lost 8x10

I love the way stan sounds when he knows he right and is talking to someone stupid coz he’s like bffr and has no enthusiasm in his speech coz bffr