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36 questions that can make two strangers fall in love

In Mandy Len Catron’s Modern Love essay, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This,” she refers to a study by the psychologist Arthur Aron (and others) that explores whether intimacy between two strangers can be accelerated by having them ask each other a specific series of personal questions. The 36 questions in the study are broken up into three sets, with each set intended to be more probing than the previous one.

The idea is that mutual vulnerability fosters closeness. To quote the study’s authors, “One key pattern associated with the development of a close relationship among peers is sustained, escalating, reciprocal, personal self-disclosure.” Allowing oneself to be vulnerable with another person can be exceedingly difficult, so this exercise forces the issue.

The final task Ms. Catron and her friend try — staring into each other’s eyes for four minutes, with the suggested duration ranging from two minutes to four. But Ms. Catron was unequivocal in her recommendation. “Two minutes is just enough to be terrified,” she told me. “Four really goes somewhere.”

Set I

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

Set II

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

17. What is your most treasured memory?

18. What is your most terrible memory?

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

20. What does friendship mean to you?

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

Set III

25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … “

26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …”

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

The problem isn’t falling in love, it’s staying in love. 

Source: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html

Health, Skin care, & Beauty tips pt.I💋💋 ©reds to @AmbitionVEVO on twitter!

Random hoe tips (pt. 2)

Vitamin E can help alleviate period symptoms. It’s in avocados, almonds, broccoli, etc. 

Take 1 banana and a tablespoon of honey and mix together to make a nice face mask. 

Avoid wearing cotton panties before and after sex because cotton panties trap lint in the crevices of your thighs. 

Take a detox bath. Mix 1 cup of ground-up oatmeal, 1 cup of epsom salts, and 2 teaspoons of lavender bud and put 2-3 spoonfuls of the mixture in your bathwater. 

Shave your vag downward or diagonally. 

To hide a hickey, apply green concealer all over and top with foundation and powder. Bam. Hickey-be-gone. 

Avoid feminine washes such as Summer’s Eve. They’ll throw off the natural pH of your vag. Mild soap works just fine. 

An amazing product is Anastasia Dipbrow Pomade. You’re welcome. 

If you use hair removal creams on your vag, you’re more prone to a yeast infection. 

Need a natural facial toner? Dilute 1 teaspoon of apple cider vinegar in a cup of water. 

Yoni oil makes your vag extremely soft. 

Foods with Vitamin B6 will help relieve bloating. It’s found in bananas, oatmeal, potatoes, etc. 

Rimmel Stay Matte foundation is only $6, is great for full coverage, and feels absolutely weightless. 

When you bleed onto your panties during your period, put your stained panties into a mixture of ¾ ice cold water and ¼ peroxide. Mix the liquid and give it 2-3 hours before letting your blood-free panties dry. 

Vaseline cocoa butter or Johnson’s baby lotion does wonders for your legs after you shave. 

Coconut oil and brown sugar make the perfect body exfoliator. 

Maybelline Pumped Up Mascara is tear-proof. 

Honey and white sugar make the perfect lip scrub. 

If you don’t exactly know how to shave your vag: exfoliate, rub the area with baby oil to soften the hair, shave with a 4-blade razor (they do a better job shaving) and apply unscented deodorant liberally to avoid razor bumps. 

Drinking cranberry juice helps prevent UTIs. 

Cranberries and pineapples help improve the natural scent of your vag. 

Men’s razors are cheaper than women’s razors and they also shave a lot better. 

If you have sensitive skin, use witch hazel, rose water, or mud masks. 

Do NOT douche. Douching can cause STIs and yeast infections. 

Soak your feet in lemon juice; hot water will dry out your skin. 

“I love you”… “It’ll pass”

GOD FLEABAG BROKE ME

MASTERPOST OF ALL THE HOE TIPS/GLO UP TIPS YOU’LL EVER NEED ✨

1. How to be a bad b!tch

2. Skincare/beauty tips from twitter user @ambitionVEVO

3. Hoe products to try out 

4. Random hoe tips pt.1

5. Random hoe tips pt.2

6, How to look expensive on a budget

7. Even more ways to look expensive for cheap courtesy of the queen Amber Scholl 

8. A hoe’s guide to flirting

9. How to make your skin glow 

10. Real life hoe tips

11. Hoe wisdom - MANIPULATION

12. How to hoe when you’re not a hoe

13. SELF LOVE

14. How to have the softest skin + hoe bath & body care routine

15. Tips for treating yourself

16. Self-improvement masterpost

17. Treating body acne

18. Super silky summer legs!

19. 25 common makeup mistakes courtesy of @ImTheBombDotCom on twitter

20. The Bad B!tch Mentality

21. The Bad B!tch Mentality pt.2

22. How to get rid of dark spots : underarms, neck, inner thighs (read description)

23.  Hygiene/beauty masterpost

THAT’S ABOUT IT FOR NOW BBYS, DON’T FORGET TO FOLLOW ME FOR MORE AND HMU ON HERE OR @bitchynextdoor IF Y'ALL HAVE ANY QUESTIONS♡

wilson + looking at house

If you need…

Rest and recuperation:

- take a nap

- sit in the warm sunshine

- cuddle a pet

- take a bath

- go to bed early

- meditate

- forget all the yoga and just lie in corpse pose for however long you need

Self love:

- put on body lotion

- change your clothes into something more comfortable

- wash your hair

- light some candles

- write a love letter to yourself

- list 10 good things about yourself

Reminiscence and nostalgia:

- watch a childhood classic on TV

- clean your room: make it cozy and safe

- care for yourself the way your guardians would when you were a sick child

- do a small task or hobby that you used to love - listen to old music

- play a game from your past

Energy:

- eat a healthy meal

- put on some upbeat music

- drink ice cold water

- change into clothes that make you feel good but aren’t pyjamas

- go for a walk

- challenge yourself to do the things you want to do and reward yourself after

Companionship:

- get in touch with a friend

- go to a public place, like a coffee shop

- say hello to a stranger

- call your mum

- message a long lost friend

- arrange to meet someone you love

- join online groups of people with similar interests

Health:

- do some light exercise

- drink a glass of water

- do some yoga or stretches

- go to bed early

- take a short walk or jog

- eat something healthy and tasty

- clean your home

To express yourself:

- write about how your feelings

- dance to your favourite music

- sing

- put on makeup

- paint or draw

- bullet journal

- write a story, some poetry or a diary entry

- change your hairstyle

Comfort:

- drink something warm

- go somewhere you feel safe

- spend time with safe, loving people

- watch a lovely tv show or movie

- get under some blankets

- if it’s cold, sit by a fire

- cuddle someone or something

- give yourself a little hug

self checks are a very important part of self-care and good mental health! make sure you check up on yourself and do things that help you when you don’t feel so good.

end of beginning - djo

💕A Glow Up Challenge💕

Day 1: Start reducing screen time at least an hour before you go to sleep. Read a book, do some drawing, take a bath, etc. You’ll sleep like a baby.

Day 2: Start moisturizing your face with SPF twice a day.

Day 3: Start using mouthwash BEFORE brushing your teeth; it helps get bacteria and other microbes off of your teeth more efficiently for a stronger clean👄

Day 4: Take 5 minutes to stretch right after waking up.

Day 5: Start drinking a glass of cold water before you eat breakfast to kickstart your metabolism.

Day 6: Start applying Vitamin E oil to your stretch marks right after you shower daily for smooth flawless skin.

Day 7: Start doing a mini 5 minute work out before your shower: squats, pushups, planks, whatever you like doing.

Day 8: Take a day off from social media to actually enjoy your surroundings🌅🌄

Day 9: Take an epsom salt bath for an overall detox (you can find bags of epsom salt at your local pharmacy).

Day 10: Start the day with a healthy breakfast. Scrambled eggs, a bowl of fruit, some whole grain toast, etc

Day 11: Switch from coffee to tea for a healthier caffeine fix☕

Day 12: Take a break from makeup today. Let ya skin breathe.

Day 13: Start applying SPF to your hands daily👐

Day 14: Go meatless for the day. You’ll really feel the difference in your body/energy throughout the day.

Day 15: Do a face mask today, whether it be a homemade one or that one with the pretty packaging that you always want to do but the time never felt right. Yeah, that one!!

Day 16: Create a “getting ready” playlist, put songs for the mood you want to be in, instead of the mood you are in🎶

Day 17: Four words: SEA SALT SCRUB DOWN. Mix some olive oil and sea salt and you got yourself a bomb ass body scrub.

Day 18: Declutter something today, having a more organized environment will help improve your mood.

Day 19: Go commando for today! You gotta let her get some air.

Day 20: Exercise, it doesn’t have to be intense at all. Go for a walk with your dog, for a jog, even a dance session in your room with your fave playlist🏃

Day 21: Clean your sheets today, especially your pillow case!!! There is all kinds of shit that could be on there rn, you should be doing this every 1-2 weeks.

Day 22: Wake up 2 hours earlier (okay.. 1 hour) Use this time to make your day less stressful.

Day 23: Spend your spare time reading or studying today📚

Day 24: Eat some chocolate; yes seriously. Dark chocolate is ideal but any will do. It’s great for your metabolism and your mood!

Day 25: Try something different with your hair today. Doesn’t matter if it’s just a new style or maybe something big like a new color, or cut. Even parting your hair a different way can transform your whole look💇

Day 26: Beat ya face, dress up real cute and take a bunch of selfies.

Day 27: Start flossing after every meal to avoid plaque building up on your teeth so you can strengthen and protect those pearly whites😀

Day 28: Delete old contacts of people you don’t fw anymore, and unfollow any people you don’t fw on social media. Cutting off dead ends clears your skin✨

Day 29: Splurge on some cute ass lingerie that makes you feel like a queen, whether it be for yourself, your mans, or ya lady. Having sexy lingerie on as you go about your day can boost your confidence for sure

Day 30: Apply a sugar scrub to your lips once or twice a week and moisturize them daily to keep your lips nice and luscious😘