Constantine Finding Out Billy Smoked Once (Like Once In His Entire Life) And Starts Playing Random Anti-smoking

john telling billy to get beer for him from the local liquor (forgetting that billy is a minor in the process) is something that i think he’d do

Joker’s asking the important questions.

instead of shoving jason’s storyline into an already full young justice season they should just make a bat family animated show where it’s just batman and his kids dealing with their drama. I’d watch the shit out of that.

gods and their favorites

I will always find solace in the fact that Billy Batson is too poor to be an iPad kid.

For Character Bingo how about Drift

My opinions are not popular because I still like my Drift seasoned with a soupcon of kook. He plays up his spirituality to achieve an effect (mostly provoking Ratchet), but he actually does believe in that shit. It's just funnier if the contradiction is real. He's manipulative. He's cynical. He's a stone cold killer. But he was also physically rebuilt and socially deprogrammed by a crunchy granola back-to-the-land utopian cult during an extremely impressionable period in his life, so yeah, he really is into herbal healing and will gamely read your star chart. What's delicious is you can never really tell if he's shitting you or not. Dream diary? Sure. You nod and agree, because you're kind of terrified of him.

WAIT WAIT WAIT

-the green lantern corps is a lifeguard company/squad

-the star sapphires are workers for an ice cream stand/truck LMAO 

headcanons for batlantern mermaid au?💞

hmmm. I’ve never been super into mermaid aus but I do have some Thoughts about this

Hal is a life guard and one day he spots mermaid Bruce on the shore and saves him from getting killed by some hunters. They don’t really get to talk and Hal barely gets a good look at him.

He doesn’t see him again for awhile but he eventually spots other, smaller mermaids. They seem to be watching him. And he keeps finding random gifts near his house.

One time Hal runs out to save someone getting swept away by the current, and while he saves them he ends up getting pulled under by some waves. He wakes up in a cave somewhere surrounded by mermaids.

According to the one who introduced himself as Dick, Bruce is the one who saved him, but he’s somewhere else brooding. Hal is literally just laying there like :O there’s so many mermaid in the water.

Damian’s like “thank you for saving our father” and Hal jumps because he didn’t even see him he’s so tiny

Bruce comes back and he’s like “WHAT are you guys doing I told you not to go near the human they’re dangerous >:(“

Anyway Hal thinks Bruce is scary but also really fucking pretty and maybe his brain to mount filter isn’t working very well and he just goes “wow you didn’t tell me I got saved by an angel” and of course the kids think this is hilarious. Bruce is unamused.

But also Hal is beautiful and maybe humans aren’t so bad because Hal saved him and hasn’t told anyone about them and he’s making his children laugh.

Okay I’ve had more than a few thoughts about this. Bruce doesn’t trust humans because his parents were killed by some hunters, but he still does his best to rescue mermaids and humans without being seen because he can’t just let anyone die

Bruce didn’t really think through rescuing Hal. He just saw him drowning and made a split second decision. But now this stupid human is flirting with him and apparently his stupid children already like him.

Please I would like more billy spilling tea.(also this batkid au is so fun you are amazing)

YOUR WISH IS MY COMMAND

(Thank you! I've had this idea for a while so I'm very excited to be able to yell about it!)

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Billy, half naked on top of Bruce Wayne's car: Superman punched Green Arrow today

Damian, getting out of Bruce Wayne's car: Oh?

Billy, slowly sliding off the car: It's cause he was bragging about the fact that he had sex with your dad

Damian:

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Billy, duct tapped to the wall: Robin stabbed Green Lantern and called him a little bitch, and now Hank is crying

Damian, duct tapping Billy to the wall: Good for Robin.

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Billy, covered in swamp water: Have you seen Damian?

Cass: *signing* No, why?

Billy: I need to tell him about how Barry accidentally poisoned Diana

Cass:

Cass: *signing* I am intrigued

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Billy, wearing a strangely fancy suit: Hi, Mr. Wayne sir, can you tell Damian that Hank and Iris are fighting at Denny's tommorow at three a.m?

Bruce:

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Billy, stuck in a sleeping bag: Superman said that Jon was an angel and Robin was going to burn in hell

Jon, also stuck in a sleeping bag: Nice

Duke, Damian, Cass: *Laughing*

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Shazam (Billy): Damian said you guys were over rated nerds

Shazam (Billy): Except Diana.

Green Arrow (Oliver Queen): Are you spilling tea, or delivering a message

Shazam (Billy):

Flash (Barry Allen): Don't answer that

reblogging this because this is going to be inspiration for a fic

(mmm adventures of tired+bitchass DILF constantine and a swearing sunshine 12 year old kid) this is a horribly long list im sorry; im adding to the "john and shazam are dating misunderstanding" hc i saw when browsing

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due to billy's reaction at canary telling him that john kissed zantanna, word gets around that john is lowkey polyamorous

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the engagement party is somewhat awkward cuz john and billy are like: ??? what????

billy, as he sees john being congratulated on his "engagement" by the members of the jl: is john getting married to zantanna?

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i said this before but when the league sees john with billy (without him being shazam/chilling in his true form), everyone assumes that billy’s john and shazam’s adopted kid

green arrow: how's life with your dads?

billy, in his true form, confused: don't you mean dad?

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when billy (as shazam) accidentally stubs his toe onto something hard, the jl hears the loudest "FUCK!" from him and thinks that he's gotten into john's swearing habits

superman: i see you have gotten some...habits

billy, who swears like a sailor all the time and thinks superman is mentioning his lessons with john: okay???

This is fantastic and cursed, I love it.

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Captain Marvel: (Injured)

Superman: (panicking) You’re husband is coming soon, just hang in there.

Captain Marvel, who is too injured to understand what was just said to him: k

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John: He’s a handful to put to bed.

Captain Marvel: Hey, it’s not my fault I want to keep playing!

The entire league, not knowing Cap was talking about animal crossing: 😶

hmm…